Dream of Triumph
by Myra2003
Summary: Update Aug. 22/23rd. Rhett thinks he is done with Scarlett but she has other plans as she pursues him to Charleston. Can Scarlett succeed at claiming Rhett's heart again?
1. Something beautiful

Note: Well here is my sequel. My other attempt at it that is. I did write Ice in the Wind but I decided to give another go at it and have been working on it since last summer. So please review and if you guys like it enough, I'll keep posting. But it is much harder writing a sequel then a what-if story. It has been a challenge to keep Scarlett and Rhett in character and to know what would happen. So I hope you all enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gone With The Wind or Scarlett nor any of the characters.

Part 1

Everyone knew Scarlett O'Hara Hamilton Kennedy Butler was a woman of misery and deceitfulness. She did posses beauty still for her twenty-eight years. Her complexion was still the prized magnolia color fitting for a southern belle and she had tiny hands and her waist was still trim despite the three children she had borne. Her green eyes were still bewitching and could trap any man. Yes, she was a beauty like her deceased mother Ellen Robillard O'Hara with her French descent and the square-like jaw. But she was cold and unfeeling, so did people say.

Her jaw was clenched and her face pale and strained as she stood still. She was like a reed not shaken by the wind, with no outward expression showing. Indeed, she didn't shed a tear as Melanie Wilkes was laid to rest in Atlanta's Oakland Cemetery next to Scarlett's first husband, Melanie's brother Charlie. It was just as well, thought Scarlett bitterly, for I would never want to be buried next to a man I didn't love.

All the mourners gathered around the grave as the reverend spoke. Everyone was there: The Merriwethers, the Whitings, and the Elsings. Henry Hamilton stood next to Pittypat as she wailed with her plump arms thrown around him, their feud forgotten. Dilcey, Cookie and Uncle Peter stood behind the crowd as tears silently ran down their cheeks. And Ashley, he was standing as still as a statue next to India and Beau. He started to walk away from the crowd in a daze, as he looked at all the other graves but Melanie's.

She was shaken to her very soul as she watched the casket being lowered with her only true friend in the world within it. Never would she see her heart-shaped face or hear her soothing voice. But she mustn't cry, for then the fat old cats would win. And as long as there was breath left in Scarlett O'Hara's body, the world or all of Atlanta wouldn't lick her.

"Fools all of them," she whispered, "Oh Melly why aren't you here when I need you so?" Who would love and accept her now? Rhett was gone, her children just as well lost to her for they were at Tara and they were no comfort to her. If only her little daughter with the laughing blue eyes and tumbling black curls, her Bonnie were alive she would have some comfort. But no, not far from where she stood, lay the grave stone that read Eugenie Victoria: Bonnie Butler. How cruel that her daughter was taken when that child had been more loved and admired then her other two children.

She saw Pittypat swaying on her feet about to faint but she didn't give a damn. Melanie would have comforted her. Melanie's soft brown eyes and small, soothing hands. Why, her eyes were like candles, thought Scarlett suddenly. Who had likened Melanie's eyes to candles? It had been Rhett. He should have been beside her now so they could share their grief. To cry against him and to be sheltered by his broad shoulders in this cruel world.

Ashley stood across from her, sheltered by India. India still held the grudge that she had stolen Stuart Tarleton's affections. But Stu had never wanted India. For India was still a mean and hateful spinster with a pale face and colorless lashes. She glared at Scarlett from across the crowd of mourners and Scarlett stiffly looked away, her chin rising and shoulders squared back. She saw Ashley's lifeless gray eyes meet hers and she looked away, feeling guilty and wanting to have her own greif.

She didn't want Ashley Wilkes any more. He was gone to her as the days before the war. The happy old days when Gerald would spoil her and Ellen would softly walk near her, regal and beautiful with her set face and soft voice. No, she didn't want Ashley any longer. For she had discarded him like an old pair of shoes, an old haunt that didn't mean anything to her. She would take care of him and little Beau as she had promised Melly but she could care less if she ever saw his drowsy gray eyes again or hear his talk of honor.

She wanted to desperartly forget the past. But more important than that was how she wanted Rhett. His mocking eyes and full twisting lips she would gladly trade every stolen kiss with Ashley for Rhett. He had loved her once and he must still love her. She felt an acute sense of loss and anger that he had left her when she needed him so, more now then ever. She didn't blame him for she knew she had been awful to him all those years but he had left, as if their marriage had meant nothing to him. As if his declaration of love was a thing of the past.

Like a child she frantically thought of a way to bring him back. Melanie would have helped her. But her only true friend in the world was gone. Dead because of her desire for children. Melanie had loved babies so much, but it had killed her. She blamed Ashley for that too. If it weren't for Ashley, Melanie wouldn't be dead and Rhett wouldn't have left her. But she would always be stuck with him because of her promise to Melly before she died. "He'll be hanging on my skirts for the rest of my life," she thought. "Oh if only he weren't so weak and broken, I could easily say to hell with him and forget."

"Where's her husband?" she heard someone mutter. And she heard them talking about her but she didn't care. "Shameless, going after Ashley with Mrs. Wilkes not cold in her grave..."

India glared at her as if she were to blame for what they were saying about her. With a cold look, Scarlett started walking forward, pushing past an old matron and making her way towards Melanie's large casket all ready lowered in the gaping hole. She felt a sickening and surreal feeling as she dropped one white rose on the casket. "Good-bye, Melly," she whispered with a look of pain in her eyes. But once again she had the cool look in her pale green eyes as she faced the crowd and started for her black carriage, head held high.

She saw the a crowd of darkies. Their faces floated before her, a crowd of them. The only ones she recognized were Uncle Peter and Cookie. They were crying shamelessly and clutching each other. There had to be at least a hundred people packed togther, flashes of black clothing in the crowd. They had all loved Melanie. She remembered Rhett calling her a great lady. Just like mother, thought Scarlett, like mother... gone and buried, something beautiful had died with Melanie, yet she couldn't comphrehend what it was. She stumbled past Uncle Peter, not bearing to meet his eyes, for she knew his look would match her own.

"Scarlett! Scarlett!"

She paused, her whole body stiffening as she turned and saw Uncle Henry Hamilton running towards her, his stocky body making his running difficult and kicking up the fallen leaves. He was out of breath by the time he reached her. What a bad time for him to speak with her when her whole world was falling a part!

"What is it Uncle Henry? I am in a hurry."

"I won't keep you long, Scarlett," he said. "You know how I take care of your expenses and keep things in order..."

"Yes, yes," she impatiently said. "Spit it out, Henry."

"Your husband paid me a visit this morning saying he'd like a divorce and he- he is offering you a tidy financial sum for the proceedings should you give your consent."

"Over my dead body!" she cried. Oh how dare he drag Henry Hamilton into this mess, only a few days after Melanie's death. How humiliating! So much for his talk of returning to keep the gossip down. Rhett had known she didn't want a divorce. And the fact that Rhett was still in Atlanta sent her heart trembling. More then likely he was at that Belle Watling's and that angered her all the more.

She clenched her hands and angrily stalked towards her carriage which was only a few yards away and shot over her shoulder, "You tell him I won't divorce him! And that I'll be at Tara if he wishes to contact me himself!"

"But Scarlett everyone needs you. Surely you won't leave your family in need," he said in a scolding tone as if she were a child.

She froze, her spine stiffening and spun around, her eyes narrowing into slits. "You take care of them! They've hung on to my skirts long enough. Before the funeral they all ran to me! Saying 'what do we do now?' and they came crying to me. Well I wash my hands of them. I'm going to Tara, Henry and not even God could stop me."

That's when she noticed a solitary figure alone by an large oak tree. Her heart stopped and she could hear her heart hammering. It was Rhett.

TBC


	2. Last Trace

A big thank you to Richelle Shalark, Dracoginnylover24, Tuduvant, Joyce LaKee, djeanne, lulu0814 and Annie3. Here is the next part and I hope it's in character. Enjoy and please review. :) Many of you wanted Rhett so here he is. I know it's a little short but I promise there will be many more chapters with Rhett!

Part 2

His eyes were on her but there was no smile on his face or no emotion. It was as if a dam burst, and everything, her earlier anger was forgotten in an instant and she she rushed towards him. The leaves kicked up at her feet and stuck on her skirts as she went over to his solitary figure. He was alone but his presense took up every part of her mind.

"Rhett," she breathed, coming to stand in front of him with a smile. "You did come back, I knew you would. I knew that you loved me. Uncle Henry said you wanted a divorice but I knew-"

"I came for Miss Melly," he simply said, dashing her hopes. His eyes were dull and he seemed to look past her for a moment. Then his eyes met hers again.

"Oh," she breathed. Suddenly her eyes came to life. "But you must care! Why else would you have-" she paused as she noticed Mrs. Merriwether and half of the old guard staring at them but she didn't care, let them. The same pain and anger mingled returned to her eyes. Rhett seemed to notice as he stared at her with a speculative look.

"Come on, let's go, I'll take you back to the monastary. I gather you brought the carriage."

It was a flat statement and she saw nothing in his dark eyes as they began their walk through the wet grass strewn with red and brown leaves from the oak trees. She could feel the cool wind against her face as she walked silently beside Rhett, sparing him a few glances but his fists were balled deep in his pockets and his panama hat was low over his eyes. He didn't look at her.

The closed carriage was all ready driving down Peachtree Street and looking out the open window, she saw their ornate home come into view. Once it had been her pride and joy and she had made Rhett pour an outlandish amount of money into that house. Built fashionable like a Swiss chalet, she had adored the burgundy carpet and grand staircase but now she stared at it with the eyes of a stranger.

Rhett left the carriage promptly and handed her out, the barest contact of their skin sent her blood drumming but he seemed immune to the contact. Walking up the path towards the steps, her heels clicked rhythmically as Rhett followed in silence, like a stranger and she wanted to scream to hear any sound. Opening the door, the house was as still as a grave. Everything looked utterly dull and memories flooded back.

"And I made him stay because I was too selfish," Scarlett thought sadly. "Yes, Rhett had wanted to go to Charleston with me to see his mother and I was such a fool I refused." But she didn't want to think of that now. She could almost see Tara as brightly as it had been twelve long years ago, when life was happy and innocent. Before the war had taken a toll on her. When she had many beaux and they were alive and in high spirits. She couldn't wait to go home.

She stared over at Rhett with hopeful eyes as he stood eyeing the house with a sweep of his eyes. His jaw hardened for a brief moment before his eyes met hers. "Let's go into the dining-room." He bowed with flourish and she moved ahead of him.

She walked a few yards to the heavy dining-room door. She was consious of Rhett behind her. More now then ever with the feel of his eyes watching her. She thought of the night of Ashley's party, that drunken and exhilirating night when she knew what passion meant. And her mind went back to the days Rhett would sit there in a drunken stupor after Bonnie's death. Her emotions must have shown on her face for he was staring at her as she took a seat at the table and he sat across from her.

"When are you going to Tara?" he finally asked, he was pouring her a drink.

"Tomorrow," she lightly said. It was the soonest train she could catch. She didn't want to stay alone in this house. But pride kept her from asking him to stay the night. She wasn't a child that she would beg him nor a girl afraid of her own shadow. All though the thought of him staying the night would have been most welcome.

He nodded, handing her the glass. She gratefully took it and downed it. She needed to calm her nerves donw. Her heart was beating madly and her eyes scanned the room. There was no sound and the silence was maddening! She hated his aloofness and courtesy.

"The red earth will do you some good," he commented.

Scarlett stared at Rhett a moment. Trying to analyze his feelings for her. His face was blank, yet there seemed to be a friendly easy peace between them now. He wasn't bitter to her now, she couldn't bare it if he were yet he seemed to be the ally she had had years ago, which she had missed and hadn't seen for sometime. But she didn't want even that. She wanted passion, love any emotion then polite detachment.

"Rhett, I- Uncle Henry said you wanted a divorice."

"That's right," he said. His voice sounded so tired and her heart felt dull as she stared up at him with searching green eyes. "But it's immaterial to me for divorice is a messy buisness and I wouldn't want to drag Ella and Wade through that so soon."

"But-" she fratically began.

He held up a hand. "Hear me out, Scarlett. No, I won't divorice you if you protest but I won't be your husband either. Granted I'll come here occasionally to keep the gossip down and to see Wade and Ella. But if you want a divorice..."

"I told you I don't," she shortly said with blazing eyes. He saw the same passion burning in their depths he had seen in the library at Twelve Oaks. He couldn't drag his eyes from hers for a moment before he looked away and laughed lightly, the sound so surprising her.

"It's amazing that finally you look at me as you looked at Ashley all those years ago. With that same frantic look. Ah, well it doesn't matter now."

She thought of begging him to stay, of screaming, yelling or even kicking him. He acted as if she didn't matter. He threw her love back at her, and that was one thing she couldn't stand. She wanted him to look at her with passion, to even throw barbs at her. But his eyes were dull, his face emotionless and lines of exhaustion present on his face.

"Are you leaving?" she finally asked, with her chin raised and a steady voice. While her heart beated in jerky motions and trembled at what he would say.

"Yes, I have a train to catch in a few hours. I would rather not stay in Atlanta any longer. It's too hectic and too raw. I suppose I'll try to beat the old guard in Charleston but as I said before 'the old guard never surrenders.' But I think I can beat them at their own game. I did it once before."

Scarlett nodded desolately; he was leaving. "Well I gather you'll be home in November. It's Ella's Birthday then and she would be- be disappointed if you weren't there." "And so would I," she silently added.

"Yes I'll come back for the holidays." He rose to his feet and placed on his hat.

"Rhett! Please stay!" She blurted out without thinking, rising to her feet. She threw her pride aside for a moment. Damn pride, it's Rhett that she wanted.

He only stared at her a moment, silent. "We were never good together, my pet, you know that better than me. It's better this way. Maybe you don't agree with me now but it is. If we stay together we'll end up killing or hurting each other. And I'm tired of living in a war."

Scarlett couldn't speak she only could stare at Rhett's somber, impassive face with wide eyes. He was leaving… But he couldn't, she wouldn't let him. "But you care! You know that you do. Oh, damn you how can you leave me so soon after Melly-"

Rhett walked towards her and for one moment she thought that he was going to take her in his arms. Her body seemed to jerk towards him and she nearly closed her eyes in anticipation, her head tilting invitingly. But he merely looked down at her a space between them and she saw he wasn't going to take her into his arms.

"I may not love you, Scarlett but I'll always care for you. That will never change… I'm sorry it worked out this way. Well life isn't fairy tales. Here take my handkercheif."

She took his handkercheif. The familiarity of the gesture wasn't lost on her as it wasn't lost on him. But where he would have smiled or been mocking, he was neither. He didn't seem to see her and an steady ache rose in her breast. Her back ached and her throat felt so dry.

She pressed his handkerchief to her face as she watched him leave for the second time. He walked with the same grace albiet a little wearily. He placed on his hat and opened the door, then he was gone. She wanted to hate him and said aloud to the closed door with narrowed, tear filled eyes, "Someday you'll be sorry, Rhett Butler. When you see what a lady I've become, you'll be sorry."

She wiped her tears away angrily and turned, stiffly making her way towards the stairs. Walking slowly up the steps, she made her way through the dimly lit hallway. Across the hall from her room was Rhett's. The door was slightly ajar as if beckoning her to enter and she felt herself drawn there.

It was evedent the room hadn't been used for a long time. It was dark, with at least five gas lights that had been used for Bonnie at night during Rhett's absence and even when he didn't go out to that Belle Watling's. Now they hadn't been lit for ages and dust had collected about them. The bed was made as if Rhett had been gone for ages, when he had only been gone for three days.

She searched his dressers and sideboard looking for anything he might have left behind. He had only taken his clothing. He had left behind a few cigars, brandy and even some meaningless papers. Yet she searched through everything. She hadn't ever taken the time to know Rhett. He was still a mystery to her. But she would have all the time in the world to know him; he couldn't stay away from her.

She opened the brandy decanter with shaking fingers and some sloshed over as she placed the bottle to her lips and seemed to down the contents in one gulp, wanting to be drunk. The liquid burned her throat but she didn't care. Setting the bottle back down on his night stand, she numbly walked to his huge bed. She slid between the fine silk coverlets. Only a few hours of sleep and then she worry about everything later. Yet the silence echoed through her mind and hanging her head on the pillow she cried, the last trace of brandy and cigars reaching her nose.

TBC


	3. Leaving Atlanta

Thank you Richelle Shalark, djeanne, Dracoginnylover 24, Joyce LaKee and RT4ever. Your reviews mean so much to me. I know this is a very short chapter and rather boring but I promise it will get better and this chapter is a transition chapter so it was needed. Just hang on and I promise it will be a lot more interesting! Thanks and please review and enjoy.

Part 3

She didn't care about any of the old ties to the Wilkes and the Hamiltons. They may have been her family by marriage to Charles but he had been dead for twelve years now and all they had brought her was misery save Melanie. Always asking her what to do and making her life a living hell with their high talk and gossip.

She had spent a restless night alone in the house. It was unberable and she counted the hours until her train came. She couldn't sleep and had rummaged through the brandy cabinet in Rhett's room, finding a bottle and downing it. She assured herself she wasn't becoming an alcoholic. She had needed that burning liquid that lulled her to sleep.

Now, the next morning, her mind was set and now that Melanie was gone she would no longer treat the Wilkes and Hamiltons like family. For Melanie had been the last link to them. She did feel a brief twinge of guilt, for Melanie would have comforted them, but she wasn't as sweet as Melanie had been. With a feeling of desolation, she knew in some part of her mind she would never be like Melanie or her mother.

Yet someday... someday she might reach a semblance of it. But for now, she didn't care, all that mattered was Tara. To see Mammy again and to cry on her bosom as she had when she was a little girl. She missed her refuge of the red rolling hills. It was all she had left and she intended to find peace and get Rhett back, even if it killed her.

Rhett divorce her? Ha! She would never divorce him. She knew word had probably spread like wild fire that Rhett had left her and they had been seen together at the funeral. But she didn't care. Her train left at noon and she wouldn't miss it for anything in the world.

She went out of her room with purpose, freshly dressed in a mourning gown with a full bustle and slippers on her feet. Her hair was plaited back and she had washed the smell of brandy from her breath with colonge. Her stomach was turning but she couldn't eat, thus she left her plate of breakfeast untouched. She didn't know where help was when she needed it and her eyes impatiently scanned the empty hall.

"Prissy! Prissy!" she yelled, her voice echoing throughout the house.

Suddenly the mouse-like girl appeared quickly from the kitchen, running across the downstairs foyer, her face tear streaked. She ran up the stairs, nearly triping on her feet. "Lawdy Miss Scarlett! Ye scerd me to death." Her body was trembling.

Why, pa had bought her twelve years before from John Wilkes she didn't know. She could never get anything done right, even after all these years. And now that Scarlett thought about it, Prissy was no longer a girl but at least twenty-four years old. But still, she couldn't think of her as a woman but a silly and stupid girl.

"Are the bags packed as I ordered you?"

"Yes'm. Oh Miss Scarlett," she wailed. "What will we do without Miss Melly?"

A momentary pang hit Scarlett. She bit her lip but pushed the face of her former sister-in-law, friend and confidant from her mind. She wouldn't think about Melanie now. She reclaimed her composure and snapped, "What any of us do when we loose someone, continue on with life. At Tara I won't have you sniveling and making the place gloomy. You hear-"

Prissy let out a cry and nearly fell at Scarlett's feet. "Oh Miss Scarlett. You's taking me with ya? I swears ye won't be disapointed. I'll-"

"Oh hurry up and go grab the bags before I change my mind!"

Prissy scurried away but had a satisfied smile on her face. It was against her better judgment bringing Prissy. If the darkies weren't freed during the war she'd take a strap to that girl. Not so much wanting to, but the thought was welcoming. She really wasn't as upset as she sounded but she had to keep a firm hand with that Prissy or she would be shrinking her duty and run off humming songs all day.

She tapped her foot impatiently and looked around the house. The image of Rhett leaving her yesterday came to her mind and Melanie dying. "Be kind to Captain Butler, he loves you so." The words echoed in her mind. Melanie, Melanie... Her voice faint yet so loving, would continue to echo and torture Scarlett for years to come. But she couldn't think of Melly now, she would go crazy if she did, she'd think about her tomorrow...

But first she would get Rhett back. She never failed. If she had to lie and make a fool of herself she would get him back. For she had never failed and even high and mighty Rhett Butler wasn't immune to her charms. He did care for he had come to the funeral. She smiled an unearthly smile for the first time in days, oh, she would get him back. Her jaw clenched stubbornly as Prissy came back and saw her mistress deep in thought. She stared at the determined green eyes and felt a sinking feeling lest she make Scarlett fly into rage.

"Hurry now," she ordered, pulling her mind from her thoughts. Her voice was slow and filled with less heat. "Take the bags outside."

Prissy stumbled down the stairs, nearly tripping that Scarlett cringed. But Prissy kept a tight hold on the banister. Pushing the heavy front door open, Scarlett followed closely at her heels, her train dragging on the ground. She looked back over her shoulder at the last sight of her home. She knew she would return but not for a long time. And when she did return it would be with Rhett.

TBC


	4. Back Where She Began

Note: Thank you djeanna and Joyce LaKee! You both are so wonderful and for all my other reviewrs thank you also. I hope you enjoy and please review.

Part 4

The moment Scarlett stepped off of the train in Jonesboro with Prissy in tow, she smiled. Breathing in the country air was enough to sustain her from the nightmare she had been through in Atlanta. Maybe she would find peace of mind here and a chance to think, without the old guard staring at her and everyone clinging to her skirts.

"Hurry up, Prissy!" she ordered, a look of happiness crossing her face when she scanned the crowd of people who were emerging from the train speedily, merging with the waiting people that stood on the small platform. Her eyes found what she had been looking for.

"Oh I see Will!"

He was chewing a piece of straw as always and oblivious to the fact she had arrived. But Prissy was taking her sweet old time that Scarlett grabbed the bags herself and quickly made her way towards Will. He was perched on the seat of their rickety wagon with a smile on his face. She was waving and calling out his name when he finally saw her and smiled, the piece of straw still in his mouth.

She was powerless to the excitment that took over her. She nearly caused him to topple over as she wildly threw her arms around his waist in a tight embrace. She subconsciously laughed as she pulled away from Will's sturdy arms.

"I'm sorry Will. I was just so glad to see you, I couldn't help but jump at you… How's everyone at Tara? Tell me about Tara? Mammy and the children. Oh, I'm so happy that I'll even ask how Sue is."

"It's just as good as the last time you asked," he said referring to the wire she had only sent him a month prior.

Scarlett blushed. "I'm just so glad to be here," she distractedly answered.

"We are all mighty glad to have you back, Scarlett. Will Rhett be joining you soon?"

Scarlett's former happiness diminished. She dropped her eyes, lest he should notice her thoughts. No, Scarlett thought miserably, he won't be joining us. Just as quickly she raised her eyes with false cheerfulness. "Perhaps," she answered, seeing the same queer look crossing his eyes. "I am glad to be home," she hastily added. "Isn't it silly, wanting to be home so badly when you only live a mere twenty miles away?"

"No not at all. I know how much Tara means to you." He still had that queer look in his eyes.

Prissy had finally made her way to the wagon. Scarlett drank in the sight of Will, it was almost as if she were home again. What a relief to see such a familiar face and Will had always been so helpful, especially during the war. He was the brother she had never had and wise too, even though he was a cracker.

"Here let me help you up so we can get goin' and I'll tell you news of Tara."

He took her bags and helped her into the seat next to him and Prissy hopped in the back. Sitting down he took the reigns in his hands and with a click, the horses were off and Scarlett sat back with a sigh. The last sounds of the train's whistle reached her ears as they pulled away. She took comfort from the fact that despite everyone else had changed. Will hadn't. He was still dependable.

A few miles down the road leading to Tara, she jerked breifly in her seat, she felt as if any moment the wagon would break from underneath them. This wagon was at least six years old; it might have been even older. She didn't know why Will wouldn't buy a carriage. He certainly had the money and if he didn't, Scarlett would be willing to help. Yet, there was something very simple of being on this small wagon. It reminded Scarlett of when she was a small girl.

Many times when Gerald had rode out to town he had brought her with him. He had always laid out a small bit of hay in the back of the wagon so Scarlett could comfortably lie on it, watching the tumbling white clouds pass by and feel the soft breeze of the warm country air caress her face as he sang Peg in the lowback car or the Wearing of the Green. Those were the carefree days. How she missed them! It had been so long since she had been able to lie back in a wagon and enjoy the beauty of the day.

It was strange now that seven years later, after the war she should return. At that moment Scarlett decided she was never leaving this land again. She didn't care. She would speak to Rhett and cut all ties from Atlanta eventually. She remembered how she had married Frank to keep Tara but she had only lost it then. For she had moved to Atlanta and Suellen and Will practically took it over.

"For the first time in a long time, I'm happy. Do tell me the news."

"Well the house is in mourning, Scarlett. After we received your telegram everyone was beside themselves...The children came from Marietta as soon as we recieved your wire."

"It was awful, Will," Scarlett softly said, when he asked her about the funeral. "I wish you all would have been there. Everyone was against me and saying I had designs to go after Ashley-"

"Did you?" he asked.

Her eyes flashed. "How can you ask me that, Will Benteen? Of all people I thought you would be on my side. To insinuate-"

"Calm down. I was only askin' because I know how you felt about Ashley all those years durin' the war. I knew you loved him and would have run off with him if you had half a chance. Why, everyone could see your feelings for him."

"Did pa-"

"No, Scarlett. He didn't see your feelings for Ashley in the end. He was too far gone to notice anything but memories of your mother. I was with him his last days you know."

Her heart returned to a normal pace and she smiled sadly, looking out at the distant hills. She thought of Gerald O'Hara, how he had been before the war. So very determined and loud with his thick Irish brogue. But gentled under the hand of Ellen. He had loved her the most, she had been his puss as Bonnie had been Rhett's princess. To only have those days back! When she was young and carefree, only worrying about the dress she would wear the next day... She had come a long way since then.

"All that's changed now, I never loved Ashley," she simply admitted. "I only thought I did. I threw happiness away with two hands and now Melly is gone and I can never make it up to her. But somehow I will through Beau. He'll never be in want of anything as I promised."

"And Ashley?" he asked.

She felt a twinge of anger, loathing, sadness and pity when she thought of the man that had held her heart for eighteen years. She had been fourteen when he had rode up to Tara like a knight in shining armor. What a fool she had been! But she would never be a fool again.

"As for Ashley he'll never know a woman is taking care of him," she laughed lightly, almost bitterly. "You know his honor and his pride."

Will nodded and suddenly stopped the wagon. Her brows furrowed and she eagerly leaned forward. Scarlett was so preoccupied with her thoughts she didn't notice his searching eyes.

"Why are we stopping Will? We're at the turn to Tara."

"I know. But I wanted to bring up something before we get to Tara. I had a talk with Mammy and she said that you and Rhett weren't well after Bonnie died... And I was wondering..."

"Spit it out, Will," she demanded but he wavered. "Do you want to know if Rhett left me? Well he did right after Melly died. But he will return, I know he will, for he has always come back to me." She smiled triumphantly as her eyes met Will's. "Now hurry up, I want to get to Tara."

He nodded after a pause and clicking the horses forward they took the turn. Scarlett saw her beloved Tara come into view. It looked somehwat shabby with shutters falling off but it was home. Will should really let her give him more money to restore Tara for it had aged with the years but of course he had his pride and he was independant. She secretly admired him for it, at least he wasn't asking her for money constantly as her aunts did in Charleston.

Her eyes shined, Tara would be great again for she would see to it after she got Rhett back of course. Will was all ready bringing it back to a semblance of what it had been before the war. The barn was filled with chickens and animals again. The fields would be ready for cotton in summer and the fertile ground was being broken in. Will had been good for Tara. Rhett had once called it a great white elephant but it was hers, even if Suellen lived here and Careen had given her share to the Church. Tara would always be hers first.

She would always think of the oak trees that lined the driveway and the trees that gave the porch shade during the hot summers. It wasn't the summers she remembered with a cold chill was over the county. Yet, the sight of Tara affected her just the same. The sloping red hills were crimson, almost blood-like in color from the earlier rain. She could smell the rain and the slight smell of the trees and her heart began to beat excitedly. She could see Tara through the reddening leaves and the trees that were mostly bare, she saw home clearly now like a beacon.

The wagon stopped with a jolt. Will rose up and shrilly began to whistle. A moment later the door burst open, followed by three little girls. They ran quickly to their father in amidst of golden curls. Each clinging to him as if they hadn't seen him in years. Scarlett smiled at the picture it made. Will loved all three of his daughters, just like Rhett had had a special place for Bonnie in his heart. She pushed thoughts of Bonnie from her mind

"Where's Mammy?" she asked, stepping out of the wagon. She looked around the yard quickly, expecting to see the scolding black face that she knew so well. Suddenly Mammy did appear. Her face was wreathed with a huge smile as she difficultly waddled towards Scarlett. But Scarlett didn't stay still, with an ecstatic cry she ran to Mammy, throwing herself in her arms. She laid her head on her chest.

"Mammy," she whispered.

"Dar, dar, honey. Ole' Mammy is here. Ah missed you mah dear sweet lam'. Doan ya be cryin' now Miss Scarlett, ya doan want to be worrying the chilun."

"I'm just so glad to be home. I missed you so terribly, I missed everyone. Even Sue." Yes, she had even missed Suellen. Hopefully Suellen wouldn't lash out at her, Scarlett was sure she wouldn't be able to control herself as she had a year ago.

"Well ya better not be too happy to see Miss Suellen. She is 'specting again. Her mood is jus' as sour as ole' milk. She jus' about wo' lil' Miss Sussy with a whup only because she was runnin' in de house."

"Oh!" Scarlett managed to say. Suellen expecting again! There had to be a law against women having so many children. Why, Suellen almost had a baby every year. Will and Suellen wanted a boy so badly. Well, Scarlett suspected Will wanted a boy more badly than her sister did.

"Well, look what the cat dragged in," a voice said from the porch.

Scarlett couldn't keep herself from staring at Suellen's round stomach in surprise. She looked as if she were a year pregnant! She saw how much Suellen had aged over the years, her face slightly bloated and figure thicker. Not the annoying kid sister before the war. Still annoying yes, but Suellen would never be the young girl she once was. But Scarlett smiled for she would have to at least be civil with Suellen. After all they were still sisters.

"Hello, Sue. You are looking very well." It was a bald faced lie but Scarlett smiled slightly. Suellen had a puffy face and her waist was so very thick that she waddled like Mammy. But she was trying to be polite, to her credit.

"Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?" Scarlett asked with raised brows as she began to walk towards the porch.

"Why should I have? It's not as if the whole world should know. This is my fourth child after all. It isn't a big surprise or a happy one," Suellen remarked bitterly. Scarlett looked over to Will who was walking towards his wife. He visibly winced.

"What nonsense!" she replied with false cheerfulness. "Of course it is. Someone once told me that the happiest times were when babies came. Hopefully in a month or two I'll have a nephew. I'm very happy for you, Sue." And she did mean it, even though Suellen didn't deserve children and was nasty.

"You were always the best liar in the county."

"Suellen," Will swiftly cut in, "Let's go into the house. You need your rest." Suellen only scowled as she pushed past her husband and stormed into the house. Will turned to Scarlett with an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry, Scarlett. Suellen hasn't been feeling well. I think I'll go check on her. Don't worry about the bags; I'll get them later. Make yourself right at home."

"It's all right, Will. Go to Sue. I'll visit with Mammy," she assured him. He nodded before turning his full attention to his three daughters. He talked in a soothing tone, assuring them that their mother was fine, before going into the house.

"Does Suellen always treat Will this way?" Scarlett asked, turning to Mammy. Mammy frowned briefly; her black face seemed to become even darker.

"Doan ya be a worryin' Miss Scarlett. Miss Suellen usually act dis way. But she is only getting' wors' because she is 'specting. Women get mighty moody when they are carryin'. Ya did git very moody too, Miss Scarlett. I can always tell when you are 'specting." Scarlett only nodded and nearly jumped in surprise when she felt a tug at her sleeve she looked down.

Ella stood there, her ginger curls badly in need of brushing and her cheeks covered in tears. Scarlett had forgotten that her daughter had rushed out with Mammy. She hadn't even greeted her own daughter but decided to over look tha fact as she pasted a smile on her face.

"Hello, Ella are you glad to see mother?"

"Is Auntie Melly really gone?" Ella asked instead, her hazel eyes brimming with tears as she looked up at her mother, her lips trembling.

Scarlett nervously looked at Mammy. God's nightgown! She didn't know how to comfort a crying child. Melanie and Rhett had always done that for Wade and Ella. She knew Ella would start crying any moment for she always cried.

"Yes," Scarlett replied. "Now go inside the house and tell Wade I arrived."

"Oh Mammy!" Ella sobbed, throwing her arms around Mammy's thick waist and sobbing against her chest. Mammy soothed her as she had soothed Scarlett as a little girl. But even Scarlett couldn't remember crying much, even then. She shifted awkwardly on her feet with a sigh. She wished she understood Ella and how she felt, but she didn't. She only knew she was hurting more, for Melanie had been like a sister to her and she wanted to cry herself. But she wasn't afforded the luxury and she mustn't show weakness in front of Suellen.

Ella had finally quieted down to hiccuping sounds, her face still buried on Mammy's chest. The three girls were lingering by the door and watching their cousin with curious eyes and talking to each other. After a moment the trio rushed into the house with a slam of the door

"Now chile ya go into de house and tell Mistah Wade dat his mama's home," Mammy told Ella.

Ella gave one last glance to her mother, her eyes pleading. Why, Scarlett thought, in surprise, she has Frank's eyes. How Frank's eyes would be so very harmless and pleading whenever he would stare at her and beg her to calm down. Ella had inherited Frank's looks and his demeanor. Her small lips trembled as she ran into the house in tears.

"Oh Mammy!" Scarlett sighed. "I know nothing of comforting children. What will I do? I want peace. I left Atlanta to have people quit clinging to my skirts and I come here-" she stopped abruptly, not wanting to sound selfish. Oh how Rhett had always taunted her that she wasn't a good mother!

Mammy shook her black head firmly. "Ya jus' have neber been close to your chillin'. Many ladies ain't close to dey chilin'."

"I should have been, Mammy. They are the only people I have left. Even Rhett…" Scarlett caught herself, stopping in mid sentence. She quickly looked up to Mammy's eyes, hoping she hadn't heard her but by the change in Mammy's face, Scarlett knew that she had heard her.

"Whut is it chile? Where is Mistah' Rhett?"

"In Charleston on business."

"Business? At a time lak this when yous need him? I doan believe it. You's lying Miss Scarlett. An' doan think jus' cuz Miss Melly is gone and we are mournin', and you's in pain dat I'm gwine to belive you when you's say he's in Charleston on business-"

"Belive whatever you like," she snapped, but forced the edge out of her voice. "Let's go into the house."

Mammy sensed there was something wrong but didn't question it. As many times before, she only went to her favorite girl and gathered her up in her arms.

"Dar, dar honey. Ya tell ole' mammy ever' thin' t' nite. Doan morn for Miss Melly, chile. She lived a good life, a very good life. She loved ya more then any' thin' else. It was her time." Scarlett nodded, even though the words did little to comfort her.

"Yes, Mammy. Let's go inside. I missed Tara so badly. It isn't the same being away from home." She put her hand in Mammy's as they started off towards the brightly lit house. As many times before, she got her strength from Tara. Now walking towards it with Mammy beside her not only lifted Scarlett's spirits but also gave her a new meaning in life.

Mammy muttered over her like a mother hen, clucking and ordering Pork to take her bags. How nice it was to see Pork, the long time valet of Tara and in the end, Rhett's valet and butler. It felt almost like the good old days as Mammy urged her upstairs and the steps creaked in protest under Mammy's weight.

She heard Prissy's screeching talk downstairs with Pork, for she was Pork's daughter and Dilcey's. What a trouble pa had went through all those years ago to buy Prissy and Dilcey. Sweet and gentle pa that roared but had a big heart and couldn't stand to see anyone hurt or in need. She let Mammy lead her to the room like a child as memories vividly returned to her during the war. The bare walls and never knowing if they would have enough to eat.

She pushed those memories away. That had been years ago and now she had enough money that her and her family would never starve. She wouldn't think about the past now. She would go crazy if she did. She would think of the future and how wonderful it would be when Rhett returned and told her what a mistake he had made and that he loved her.

"Why ya smilin' lak dat Miss Scarlett?" Mammy asked as she fell back on the bed with a sigh.

"I'm just so glad to be home." It was partly true but more then that, this happiness she felt was hope for the future. She would smile and never be sad again when Rhett returned. This ache in the pit of her chest, that dull ache would be gone when Rhett took her in his arms and chased away her nightmares. How happy they would be!

TBC


	5. Road to Twelve Oaks

A big thank you to Dracoginnylover24, djeanne and Joyce LaKee. You all are awesome and I don't forget that you continually review my little story. It's so helpful especially when I wonder if it's worth continuing. I hope you all enjoy :)

Part 5

She would forget about Atlanta she determindly told herself that night after supper. The meal had been tense, Wade staring at his plate and barely talking to her. But for tonight she would forget the pain. For she had a purpose in living to get Rhett back. After she got him, she would think of all those things. Here, she would think of ways to get him back and heal from the weary load she had carried.

"I's gwine let ya rest and not be disturbed," Mammy said, waddling away with her discarded mourning gown in her arms towards the door. Mammy shut the door behind her and she dimly heard Mammy heavily move towards the stairs. But her mind was preoccupied with thoughts of Rhett. She went to the window and pushed the white curtains aside and stared out at the inky darkness. Leaning her forehead against the cold pane she sighed, how tired she was...

She had to force herself to sleep for when she was rested her mind could think more clearly. She made her way from the window to the bed and heavily fell upon it. She removed her shoes and unpinned her hair as she fell into a deep sleep. She didn't awaken for hours later until the moonlight shun in and only then did she allow herself to cry for the loss of Melanie as the sharp pain of loss hit her again. Her cries were muffled by the pillow and darkness.

"Melly," she whispered, as if that made her memory more alive. But there was no answer save the wind hitting against the window. She fell into an exhausted sleep.

She awoke the next morning, feeling rested and her body much more relaxed. Sitting up she raised her arms above her head to stretch her aching muscles. She stood up and on bare feet and quietly made her way to the other side of the bed. The cool floor against the soles of her feet made her shiver as she went to the window. Looking outside she saw it was another cold and drizzling day. The sky was slightly gray and the trees swayed in the wind, the autumn leaves fluttered over the red earth and grass.

"Oh, if only it were summer again," she murmured as she went to the mirror and dejectedly saw her reflection. She looked so pale and thin. Her eyes were slightly red and puffy from crying last night. She would just call Mammy upstairs to make her look some what decent, she couldn't bear looking so awful, even if she was in mourning, for Suellen would gloat.

Opening the door slightly, she looked out and saw no one in the hall. "Mammy!" When there wasn't a reply she sighed in frustration and was about to yell again when she heard a creaking sound and saw Wade emerge from the room down the hall. He looked almost solemn and his face devoid of happiness at seeing his mother. Indeed, he looked hesitant as he gave her a quiet hello.

"Hello, Wade Hampton," Scarlett greeted, eyeing her son thoughtfully. She wanted to make small talk as she had seen him and Melanie do so often. His face had always lit up in his aunt's presence but with her he seemed awkward and as timid as a mouse. Today he stared at her with sad brown eyes and looked almost like a miniature adult that had faced the world too early in life for his eleven years, but she didn't give it much thought. "Where's Mammy?"

"I don't know mother." He shifted on his feet. "Where's Uncle Rhett?" He craned his neck slightly as if Rhett were in her room.

"He went to Charleston," she idly said, hoping he wouldn't ask her so many questions. She didn't want to speak of Rhett now when he was gone. Wade always asked too many question.

"Oh." His face slightly fell. "I'll go fetch Mammy for you then." He was all ready walking towards the stairs.

"Thank you, Wade."

Turning back into the room she heard him walk down the steps slowly and the disappeared. She was glad she had been saved from more awkward talk with him. He was a smart boy all though he had often got on her nerves with his stalking around the house in Atlanta like a lost puppy. Rhett had always been the one to praise Wade as had Melanie and had been more tolerant of the children.

She had never had the luxury of being a good mother. Rhett had always painted her in a bad light, taking the children out in the rain when she had guests at the house that he hadn't wanted the children. And he had stolen Bonnie away from her.

She rolled her aching shoulders knowing she must have slept in an awkward position. Where was Mammy? Impatiently, she sat down on the bed and observed her nails which were badly bitten from stress. She sighed, her hands were awful. Ellen had always said you could tell a lady by her hands.

She looked away from them as the door opened and Mammy entered, out of breath. Her bosom was heaving in great breaths. "How did mah lamb sleep?"

"Well enough, I suppose." Mammy eyed her critically and Scarlett rolled her eyes in annoyance. "What? Has my face gone green or something?"

"Naw, I jus' seein' yer eyes all swollen. I's herd ya cryin' last nite an' turnin' in yer sleep."

Scarlett's face flamed. She didn't like showing weakness of any kind. Even to Mammy who she had known from the moment she was born. She shrugged and laughed lightly, trying to not feel embarrassed and to divert Mammy's attention from her pain.

"So what if I cried? I'm not made of stone you know. Now enough about what you heard. I simply look horrible. You must make me look somewhat decent, Mammy... my face is so pale and thin. And Suellen is sure to gloat even though she's as big as a house..."

"A good meal will fix dat right quick, honey. I's gwine go down to de kitchen and git yer breakfeast. A good bit of eggs and ham will do ya good. I knows how much ya love ham." Mammy was walking towards the door when Scarlett refused.

"No, I don't want to eat. I just want to go for a walk and get some fresh air. Help me get dressed."

"When's de last time ya ate?" Mammy demanded. "Yer so thin, I can see dem bones in yer face. You ain't leavin' dis house till you eat and dats dat."

She hadn't eaten much she realized. The morning after Rhett had left and Melanie had died, the cook had brought her up her breakfast but she had only picked at it. And she had been so busy she didn't eat. So busy making the funeral arrangements and listening to everyone ask her, "What do we do, Scarlett?" Pittypat had come the next morning to her home on Peachtree Street with Uncle Peter in tow, sobbing hysterically and begging her to come to her house. She had staid there until late into the night, coming home and falling into sleepless nights filled with dreams. The nightmares had kept her awake and each time she awoke, the feelings of hopelessness came upon her and a dull pain.

She knew she had taken too long to answer for she couldn't remember the last thing she had to eat. She gave a dainty shrug. "I haven't been hungry," she shortly said. "I thought mother said ladies were to eat like a bird," she added smugly. She knew she had Mammy there and do did Mammy, who was hesitant to admit defeat.

Mammy muttered an reply under her breath with a huff. Scarlett rose to her feet with a smile, knowing she had won for Mammy had all ready pulled out a black gown with a bustle with long tapered sleeves. Mammy pulled her stays so tight that she braced herself against the headboard of the bed. Finally, the dress was slipped over her head and Scarlett buttoned the buttons deftly.

"Sit down and lemme put yer hair up," Mammy ordered and Scarlett obeyed with a sigh. She was so anxious to go outside but hoped she wouldn't run into Suellen or anyone else for that matter.

"Who is downstairs?"

Mammy pulled tightly at her hair and twisted her unruly hair into a simple braid. She had always done her hair as a little girl, brushing it and braiding it to perfection for she was an expert. For years she had done likewise to Ellen's hair when they had lived in Savannah, when Ellen had been fifteen years old.

"De whole house. Miss Ella is waitin' fer you."

Scarlett felt a slight irritation as she rose to her feet. Couldn't they all just leave her alone? What she wanted was quietness and a time to think and heal. She couldn't deal with her children now, especially Ella who cried and fussed over the slightest thing as Frank had done. At least Wade avoided her but Ella clung to her skirts far too much.

Opening the door, she went out and walked down the stairs, rounding the corner she saw Suellen in the hall, with arms crossed, a look of irritation on her face and her lips compressed into a thin line. She supposed she would have to be nice for the sake of the household and her sanity.

"Hello Sue..."

"Don't hello me," she snapped, "Just the same I wanted to see what your plans were."

Scarlett's brow delicately arched as she placed her gloves on and started for the front door. "I'm going for a walk."

"You know what I mean, Scarlett. Why are you here?"

Scarlett felt annoyed and her blood boiled. What she really wanted to do was pull Suellen's hair and scream at her as she had when they were little. It was just like her sister to ruin any happiness she had felt. What a sour person Suellen was and hateful for she had always been jealous of her success. She forced a tight smile.

"Why to visit of course. You do know Tara belongs to me too. Pa would have gave me the whole land had it not been for your whining. But as it is I don't care to discuss it."

She walked past Suellen and opened the front door, walking down the front steps. As a hundred times before, she began her walk at a light pace past the dark cedars on either side of the graveled drive and with the arch. She had always thought it looked like a long tunnel. Walking out of the driveway she came on to the main road. The long winding road that she had walked so many times and followed with her eyes to the yellow Flint River and then to Twelve Oaks at the next hill, once so glorious and now only a shell. This blood colored road had once been a road to Ashley and now it was a road to to nothing.

She continued on, the wind gently fanning her face like a soothing balm. How gray and windy it was. Not at all like the warm weather she loved but it did match her mood. All thoughts of winning Rhett back were some how dim in the light of her loss of Melanie, pa, mother, Bonnie and her hopes for the future. Nothing had turned out as she had expected. But then again, she realized with a slight sigh, nothing ever did.

She crossed the Flint River, over a small set of stones that were placed as a slight bridge. Her hem dragged a little in the water but she didn't care. She was anxious to get as far away from people as possible. She had been surrounded by enough people, always watching and talking, always wanting something from her. Whether money, a smile, a favor or her company. She was glad to be alone for once. Her, who had always wanted to have admiring crowds flocked around her, didn't care if anyone admired her again. Except for Rhett...

Scarlett continued up the hill and saw the tall trees that covered Twelve Oaks from view. How wonderful it had been when Twelve Oaks stood white in perfect symmetry. It had possessed tall columns and a wide verandah with a flat roof. Once this shell before her had even been more beautiful and full of dignity then Tara. Now, before her was the wide curving driveway that was dull in color. The place still slightly ashen and in rubble. Part of the staircase still remained in tact and as she walked past it she remembered how she had first laid eyes on Rhett Butler.

Her heart cried out. Rhett! Rhett! Where are you when I need you so? But of course there would be no answer for he was gone far from the county and from her reach. He was in Charleston. He might as well be at the moon for Charleston seemed eons away. How she missed him. She walked past one column still standing and leaned against it, looking as far as her eyes could see. Even then, she knew somehow she wasn't defeated. She drew strength from looking at the dark land and the wind hitting her face. She would never be defeated and these ashes weren't hers. For she still had Tara, that still stood and she had Rhett whether he was here at this moment or not. For he loved her even though he might deny it.

"Mama."

A voice floated to her ears and her body rose to it's full height from the support of the column. Turning, her eyes scanned the dim surroundings and she saw Ella and Wade making their way towards her and Ella carried one of her black shawls in her small arms.

"Mammy wanted me to bring this to you," Ella explained in a tiny voice and thrust the shawl out to her.

Scarlett gratefully took the shawl and placed it around her shoulders. Ella was looking at her with a wistfulness and Wade merely was looking around the rubble, his eyes sad and his body shivering. He was tall and lanky for his age and for the first time she noticed with shock that he was no longer the annoying little boy that had cried and clung to her skirts when she had fled Atlanta all those years ago with Rhett's help.

"My Wade, you have grown, you look so much like your father." The words were difficult to say for Wade looked almost like a replica of Charles but with a hue of darker brown hair. And she felt the old guilt rise up within her of marrying Charles just to spite Ashley. But as always she pushed away her guilt.

She saw Wade's eyes light up like a flame. They were interested but he was too timid to ask questions for she had always sent him away with a wave of annoyance. Scarlett tried to think of what Melanie and Ellen would have said. "Your father proposed to me here at this very place when the war was announced."

"What did he say?" Wade quietly asked, ducking his head and staring down at his shoes.

Wade is so much like Charles, she thought. Both not able to look me in the eyes and with that timidity about them. Truthfully she couldn't remember what Charles Hamilton had said. She hadn't been listening and he had been stuttering so. She had thought him to be a fool but of course she couldn't say that to Wade. Rhett had called her a bad mother, but she could be a good one. She would show him.

"He declared his love for me," she simply said, her voice with little emotion as if she had been stating the weather. Wade luckily didn't notice. There was a slight smile on his face as his eyes met hers for the first time in months since before Bonnie and Melanie's death. And she felt a tug on her sleeve again and looking down she saw Ella's excited face.

"What did my papa say?" she asked.

Scarlett looked around and felt the wind picking up. She didn't want to stand here all day and answer questions about men she hadn't cared about. "I'll tell you some other time," she shortly said. "We should go back before Mammy skins me for keeping you both out here to catch your death."

Ella looked crestfallen but Scarlett pushed the slight twinge of guilt away. It was cold and she didn't want to look back at Charles and Frank, she had been so miserable when married to them. The memories were jumbled together now. She grabbed Ella's small hand and offered her other hand awkwardly to Wade. He hesitated and grabbed her gloved hand. She could feel how he shivered as they began their walk through the rubble and came out into the open air.

There was a slight drizzle of rain again as they began their walk towards Tara down the hill. She released their hands and instinctively covered them with some of her shawl so Wade would stop shivering so. She had walked this road many times and felt a slight feeling of peace come over her, a hesitant one. Caring for her children was a foreign feeling as was being a mother, but whatever she tried at, she succeeded and she would be the best mother in the world.

TBC


	6. Leaving Tara

Note: Thank you for your rviews :) To the wonderful Dracoginnylover24, missysammy, Tuduvant, djeanne, Joyce LaKee and guitarhorselover. Your reviews are much appreciated and keep me going! This is another foundation chapter... I know you all probably want me to get to the point and Rhett... But I promise Rhett will soon be a part of the story and there will be a lot more of him within a short time. Please enjoy and reviews are welcome as always :)

Part 6

A week later with the sun peeking through the gray clouds and a chill still present in the air, Scarlett sent a letter with Will addressed to Uncle Henry. He was making a trip to Atlanta to purchase some winter clothes for the children and Suellen. Suellen had whined loudly last night how she didn't have any new clothes.

"How can you think of clothes at a time like this?" Scarlett had angrily shouted over the plate of rice and gravy. She had been picking at her food after seeing the furious glares from Mammy. Hearing Suellen set her blood boiling, and all thoughts of being kind were replaced with rage, indeed the tension between the O'Hara sisters had been mounting all week.

"You are selfish when Melanie was just laid to rest and all you can do is think about clothes. You were always selfish even if you do give yourself airs," she continued with flashing eyes.

"Take that back!" Suellen cried, her face going pale and eyes blazing. Will looked angry and the children were near tears but Scarlett didn't care. Suellen was selfish and she had to be set in her place even if she was pregnant.

"No, I won't. You are a selfish brat and have always been. Why, Will just married you to save your hide after you killed pa."

"I hate you! Oh how I hate you!" she raged, rising to her feet. She looked ready to attack Scarlett but her older sister merely sat there, a cool brow arched, unintimidated.

"You can hate me all you want, but what I did, I did to save Tara and to keep a roof over your head. You wouldn't have given your family a cent during the war and would have let us all starve to death and be put out on the street."

Suellen sneered and looked ugly. It wasn't her face but her character of selfishness and hate in her eyes. The years of bitterness came out as she raged against her older sister. She wouldn't be restrained by Will or Mammy as she advanced over to Scarlett's form, her mood questionable.

"You stole everyone else's beaux and had to have Frank just because he was mine. You didn't love him-"

"Suellen," Will warned. And Suellen stopped her attack abruptly as Ella had threw back her chair with a clatter and ran upstairs with tears streaming down her face. There was a slam of the door and even Suellen flinched.

"Now look what you did Suellen Benteen," Scarlett angrily said, preparing to rise and try to comfort her daughter. Her meal was ruined. "I hope you are pleased with yourself."

But Wade had all ready rose like a gallant gentleman and had a solemn look in his eyes. "It's okay mother, I'll go to her."

Scarlett nodded and sat back down, glad that Wade had took her task of being the comforting mother. She had a pounding headache as she went up to bed, her food untouched. Will made Suellen go upstairs. The house had been in an uproar and as much as she loved Tara, she decided she wouldn't stay another week under the same roof as Suellen. One week at Tara had been enough.

Now, the next morning after her fight with Suellen, Scarlett sat out on the porch and Will had just disappeared out of the gravel driveway with her letter bound for Uncle Henry. Her plan was to leave to Charleston as soon as possible and the letter had instructions that he was to look after Ashley and Beau for her until she returned home. And if any problem was to arise he was to contact her without delay. At least her conscious was assuaged and even though she wasn't returning to Atlanta right away, she was keeping her promise to Melanie.

The house was silent and Suellen hadn't came out of her room. The children were off playing in the backyard and Mammy was of course giving strict orders to the servants and they scrambled as always in terror. She sighed, she was going mad here. The county was too quiet and had been since the war had ravaged the land and many of the county neighbors had moved out of Clayton County or had died in the war. The Fontaines, the Tarletons and the Munroes. How this land had once been alight with life and parties.

Now Tara wasn't the same. She would go crazy soon if she didn't leave and get Rhett back. She needed bustling life, for movement was in her bones. Never in her life could she stand to sit still and let life go on without her. She chased after it with the same fire she had possessed all those years with her need to live.

Mammy had given her some knitting to do and some spool and yarn. "A lady must kno' how to knit. And ya won't be so bored."

But she was bored and bored to tears. The eerie silence was unnerving. All she heard was the wind, the sound of chickens and the sound of Mammy yelling in the house. Mammy, always on command and a terror to all that didn't obey. She threw her knitting aside on the steps. She couldn't sit here and do nothing. She had to get Rhett back and was wasting precious time when she could be in his arms at that moment... Hearing the door open she quickly turned her head and saw Wade and Ella cautiously come out.

She was so happy to see anyone, even Wade and Ella. She smiled, hoping they would divert her attention from her tumultuous thoughts. They took it as encouragement and shyly asked if they could sit with her for Mammy had sent them outside.

"Of course. Here both of you sit on either side of me." She threw out her charm and they smiled. For Scarlett could be the most charming with a slight smile when she wanted something or set her mind to it. Ella was looking up at her mother.

"Aunt Sue said I was ugly and I would never have as many beaux as you had," Ella mourned. "Do you ever think I'll be as beautiful as you?"

"I'll skin that Suellen," Scarlett seethed. How dare her sister call her child ugly. They were a lot more attractive then her pale faced daughters and Sue's children were brats. She looked over at Ella and saw how hurt the little girl was. And she thought with some surprise, why Ella is pretty. True she wasn't beautiful as Bonnie had been but Ella had lost the ape-like face as a baby and now had light skin and eyes that were large and framed with dusky lashes.

"Of course you'll be pretty, Ella. I was the belle of five counties your grandfather once swore. I had marriage proposals as far as Savannah."

She was proud of her days as a belle. Mammy had praised her for her thin waist of seventeen inches, even smaller then Suellen's. The boys of the county had flocked around her. Somehow it didn't matter so much anymore as it did then. For now all she wanted was Rhett, her jaw clenched and heart felt heavy at the thought of him. But her children were oblivious to this as Wade leaned forward.

"How was Twelve Oaks before the war, mother? It must have been grand."

Wade's face had a look of rapture. Scarlett frowned slightly. She didn't want to look back but she supposed she would have to bear it for any talk was better then none at all.

"I thought it looked like Greek temple on a hill. There were so many parities and barbecue's there..." she trailed off not wanting to say more.

Wade smiled. "Uncle Ashley is very wise isn't he? He told me so many stories about the Greeks and the books he read. He said how he went to Europe. Can I go to Europe someday?"

"Of course..." she murmured with a sigh. She hoped Wade wouldn't go into talk about books. They had always bored her and she had never understood how Ashley could love them so. She had never understood Ashley and that was what had drawn her to him in the first place, which was why she was here in this mess. They must have noticed her change of mood for they quietly departed with a kiss to her cheek, lest they irritate her.

She rested her chin on her hand as soon as the door closed behind them and she looked out. She missed Melanie so very much and this house brought memories back of her in a bittersweet longing. How kind and good Melanie had been. She had helped the wounded soldiers and would have starved had Scarlett not upbraided her. Oh, Melanie, she thought, I need you so. If only you were here, you could bring Rhett back. He always had admired Melanie and listened to her opinion with the utmost respect.

The door opened again and Scarlett raised irritated eyes to the door but upon seeing Mammy, she didn't know whether to be happy or annoyed. Ever since she had arrived, Mammy had watched her like a hawk and trailed after her like a blood hound.

"I'm glad to see it's you and not Suellen."

"I's come out here to tell ya the chillun are happy Miss Scarlett dat ya spen' time with dem. Dey were beamin'. I ain't seen dem so happy for a lon' time."

Scarlett glowed under the praise. She had always wanted Mammy and mother to be proud of her. And one day everyone would be when she became the great lady she had always wanted to be.

"I'm leaving tomorrow for Charleston and I'm going to ask Will if the children can stay here."

The look of praise swiftly left Mammy's face and her eyes became narrow. "Whut ya sayin'. Ya can't leave yer chillun here. Dey need to be with their mother."

"Pooh. The county air would do them good a lot more then Charleston would..." But she paused as a thought came into her head. Rhett loved the children. He had always called Wade his little boy. And Rhett was just crazy over children and babies. If she brought Wade and Ella with her, he would see what a good mother she was and he couldn't refuse the children's pleas to return to Atlanta with them. But then again, Rhett could always see through her actions and he would notice. But if she got Rhett to let her stay until Christmas then she could send for the children after everything was settled!

"Miss Scarlett, I doan lak dat grin on yer face. Whut ya thinkin' 'bout?"

She averted her eyes for Mammy read her too well. "You're right Mammy. Which is why I will send for the children after I am settled. They need me now with Melly gone... Rhett will be happy to see them. Oh, everything will be perfect again!"

"I's knows de moment ye walked in de house dat somethin' was wrong. Why did Mistha Rhett really go to Charleston?"

Her heart began to beat faster but she forced a light smile. "I all ready told you on business."

"You's lyin'. I can see it right on yer face. Did Mistha Rhett leave you or did ye chase him away?"

"I- I didn't chase him way," she mumbled, not bearing to look at Mammy. To her mortification she felt tears well in her eyes and she began to sniffle as the memory of his departure flooded back to her.

"You come here honey and tell ole Mammy everythin'."

Mammy's voice was soothing as if she were speaking to a hurt child. Scarlett rose to her feet and threw herself into Mammy's welcoming arms as Ella had done. It was so good to cry and have Mammy's gnarled hand in her hair and hear her whisper, "Der, der honey ya cry. Let it all out and tell me everythin'."

Through trembling lips she told Mammy how Melanie had died and how she realized she had loved Rhett. She told her how she had run to the house to tell him and how he said he didn't love her anymore and that he left her. She spoke of the nightmare and the sleepless nights and how she was going crazy.

"I have to get him back, Mammy, I just have to."

Mammy's grip slightly loosened. "Mah lamb, you've always been stubbern. I knew it was gwine give ya heartache down de road. Look at me honey. Ya can't chase Mistha Rhett for he is stubbern lak ya and he won' lak being pursued. Ya must give him time and he'll come 'round."

Scarlett pulled away and looked up at Mammy incredulously. "Wait? I can't wait, Mammy. I love him and I know he loves me. I'll go crazy if I wait." Her eyes blazed as she stared up at Mammy with the same light she had seen twenty-nine years ago in Ellen's eyes about her dark-eyed cousin, Phillipe Robillard.

"Miss Scarlett..."

"No! I'm not going to sit by with folded hands and twittering my thumbs. No, Mammy, I'm going to get him back the only way I know how."

The old woman vigorously shook her head. "I can see yer mind workin'. Ye gwine disgrace yerself by chasin' Mistha Rhett as ya chased Mistha Ashley."

"Don't talk about Ashley!"

Mammy's lips stuck out as they always did when she was outraged or furious. Scarlett couldn't believe Mammy was telling her to wait. She couldn't wait and she would have Rhett back. It was her only chance at happiness now.

"I's jus' sayin' de truth, honey. I knows yer mind and Mistha Rhett won't take to ya chasin' him and being pursued. An' if ye think he'll come because of de chillun ya have another thing comin'. He may love those chillun but he won't be tricked. He's a smart gempum. Now, honey I knows ya love him and he's always loved you-"

"Oh, do you think so Mammy?"

"Yes mah lamb I do. But ya can't chase him for if ya do you'll loose him. Ya can't keep a man dat way."

"I don't care what you say. I only know I love him and I won't let him go. I can't! Surely you can understand Mammy. If I loose Rhett, I have nothing to live for."

The old woman shook her turbaned head. "Alls I know is ya woan listen to me. An I can't stop ya. But mark mah words Miss Scarlett, der is grief ahead. It is a sad thing when ya love a man dat don't love ya-"

"But you just said-"

"I's knows what I said. But Mistha Rhett is hurtin' something firece and he has no room to love ya now. I's sure he does deep down but honey dat kind of love can destroy yer spirit."

"Oh Fiddle-dee-dee," Scarlett laughed. "I have pa's spirit so I do. The Irish spirit that can't be broken. By next year I'll have Rhett with me and then you'll see, Mammy."

"I's hope so," the old woman sighed. "Now ya go inside and behave. I won't have ya gloating over Miss Suellen and treatin' her lak poor white trash."

Scarlett gave Mammy a peck on her weathered cheek. "Oh, what would I ever do without you? Won't you come with me to Charleston?"

Mammy laughed. "Lawdy mah lamb. I ain't set foot out of 'Lanta since I came with Miss Ellen from Savannah all those years ago. I ain't leavin' Tara again for I's gwine die here one day. Me and mah red petticoat dat Mistha Rhett done give me."

Scarlett's smile faded and fear clutched her. Surely Mammy wasn't sick! She was moving a little slower but that was only because she had aged some and she was heavy. She observed every wrinkled line of her black face.

"You aren't sick are you?"

"Naw honey. But I gettin' along in de years. Now, doan worry. When ya get back to 'Lanta and if ya need me, I'll come to mah lamb. I'll always come if ya need me."

Her body relaxed with relief and her heart slowed. Mammy was fine and all was well with the world. Now, she must tell the children she was going to Charleston right away to see Rhett and visit his mother. She would have to pack and she supposed she would have to say good-by to Suellen.

But her plans were put to a halt hours later when Will returned with a grim face and said there was trouble at the banks.

TBC


	7. The Panic

Disclaimer: I do not own Scarlett but borrowed some of Alexamder Ripley's words since I know very little about the panic of 1873.

Note: Thank you so much for the reviews even if it is rather slow and can be boring at times. But after this chapter Scarlett will be in Charleston so it will get better. Thank you djeanne, Dracoginnylover24, quibbler149, missysammy, guitarhorselover. Thanks once again and enjoy!

part 7

In Charleston, Eleanor Butler sat in the parlor, worried about her son. He had arrived only a week before and she had never seen him look so low or defeated looking. She had last seen him in June during her sweet granddaughter's funeral. He had been in a bad state then but now she barely recognized him. She had been furthur alarmed when he had arrived at her door with no explanantion.

Drinking ran in the Butler family. Her husband Harrison had drank like a fish, and her youngest son Ross had become an alcohlic. The effects of alcohol were evident on Rhett's face. She remembered when he had visited with Bonnie a few years prior, he had been blooming with health, now he looked much like his brother. Older then his forty-five years.

Now he sat before her, deep in the plush settee, a glass of brandy in his hand. Indeed, he barely uttered a word to her and when she asked of Scarlett or the children, his face would harden and he would clam up.

"Don't you think you have had enough to drink?" she quietly asked. The last traces of light came into the parlor, it was all ready evening. She had seen Rhett drink from the breakfeast table all the way to evening. He had been drinking all day without fail.

He shrugged listlessly. "Not nearly enough." He downed a glass and she watched him before setting her eyes back to her knitting. She didn't want to upraid him or poke around in his buisness. She knew it irritated him and she didn't like being seen as the nosey mother. But he was her son and it was her nature to worry about him. More then any of her children, she worried about him the most.

"Rhett, you're my son," she haltingly began. "And I only want what's best for you. Ever since you arrived in Charleston you have drank like a fish and you won't tell me about Scarlett. I don't know if she is well or if she is even alive..."

"She is very much alive," he said. His dark eyes met hers. "In fact I saw her not too long ago at a funeral."

"A funeral?" she questioned.

"I once told you about Mrs. Wilkes didn't I?"

Her brow furrowed. "Oh yes, dear. You told me she was a saint. The sweetest and truest lady." Suddenly she paused, her eyes meeting Rhett's in horror. "No, don't tell me that she-"

He nodded, his mouth twisiting cynincally. "Yes, she's dead. Didn't you once tell me that God only takes the best? Well she is gone and B-" He couldn't even finish his daughter's name, it hurt too damn much but Eleanor knew.

"Are you and Scarlett having problems, Rhett?" she softly asked.

He had a faraway look in his eyes for a moment. She had never seen his eyes so dull. She remembered the child he had been, full of life and daring. Now he was only a shell of himself. She wanted to weep but she mustn't for Rhett could never stand pity.

"When have we never had problems?" he mused. "They only intesnified over the years." He poured himself another drink. She noticed the slight tremor in his hands as he brought the glass to his lips and downed it.

"Have you eaten today?" she asked.

A ghost of a smile came to his lips. "I'm capable of feeding myself."

She nodded. It had been pressing her to know about Scarlett. Indeed she had only met the dear girl once and she had been a beauty. Vulnerable in the yards of black mourning. She had seen a deep pain in the green depths that she recognized. How she had wanted to embrace her and take her and Rhett away from Atlanta but Rhett had told her not to interfere so she had kept her counsel.

"Rhett, I know you don't like me interfering. But I must know about Scarlett. I know you love her and I simply don't undersatnd how you could be so heartless to leave her in Atlanta after she lost Mrs. Wilkes."

"Heartless?" he asked. "I suppose I am if that means that I couldn't lie to myself and stay in Atlanta. I buried the dead and I'm through with life in Atlanta and through with-" he paused, downing another glass so easily that it surprised her. He rose to his feet. "I will retire to my room."

"Rhett Kinniticut Butler I am not done speaking to you!"

"Sorry, but I am in no mood to speak," he called over his shoulder.

She watched him as he walked out of the parlor. His step was slower then usual and a little clumsy. She wanted to weep and wished that somehow a miracle would happen. She hoped that her daughter-in-law would make an apperance and maybe, just maybe Rhett would heal. His wounds ran deep and only time would heal them and maybe Scarlett was just the person who could.

"It's a panic," Henry Hamilton called it. The financial crisis that had begun in Wall Street and was spreading across the country. Scarlett had rushed from Tara with the children to Uncle Henry's office, afraid she would loose all the money she had saved over the years. He had said something furhur about some scandal with President Grant and some place called Credit Mobilier. Scarlett didn't care a whit about the president or any buisness, she only cared that her money was in jeporady.

Even more angry about the panic was the need to strangle Suellen. After she had heard the news, without a moment's hesitation, she had made preperations to leave. Suellen had stopped her and told her to take the children with her.

"I need a rest," she had fumed. "And you can take the children with you for a few hours. That will take them off my hands since you are abandoning them."

Suellen very well didn't need a rest. Why she had been months pregnant with Ella and had still worked at the store and mills. It was bad enough that Suellen rubbed her preganancy in her face. Scarlett hadn't known that thoughts of the miscarried baby would still haunt her. She had wanted the baby and seeing Suellen gloating so put her in a rage, where she was shaking and barking orders as she left Tara.

When she had returned to her awaiting carriage from Uncle Henry's office with the children in tow, she went straight to her bank. There were so many people swarming around the small bank. God's nightgown, how was she going to get through the mob?

"Why is there so many people at Uncle Rhett's work?" Wade asked, knowing of Rhett's position at the bank.

Scarlett didn't answer. "Stay with Ella, Wade. I must talk to the manager." She forced a smile. "I'll be back."

Stepping out of the carriage, she was shaking internally as she passed many people. Some faces she knew and others, she could care less. The bank manager had to simply see her. Rhett did have weight at the bank after all and they were valuable assets. Just let him try to send her away! She reached his office and with a frown at seeing her, he tried to reassure her.

"I appreciate your concern, Mrs. Butler," he said but she could see he didn't. He resented her questioning the security of the bank and him as manager for that matter. The longer he talked, it sounded as if he were trying to reassure himself!

He continued on, "We'll not only be paying our usual divident to stockholders, it's actually going to be higher than usual. I didn't get the information myself until earlier."

Scarlett couldn't keep the smile from her face as her fears were put at ease. She had once mocked Rhett's position at the bank and the money he threw into stocks but now she was so happy! Thank God Rhett hadn't listened to her former complaints about his investments.

The manger was looking at her. "I'd certainly like to know how your husband reached his decision to add to his stock holdings a month ago..."

She felt furthur relived. If Rhett was buying bank shares, this bank must be pretty secure. Rhett was no fool, he always had money even when others didn't and the world was falling a part.

"You should have known from his work here that he is a mind reader," she quipped with a laugh. The manger looked infuriated and didn't share in her amusement.

She was relived as she converted all her cash in her lock to gold. In her mind she could still see the worthless confederate bonds during the war. Still, she didn't trust paper money. Pa had believed the confederate bonds would pull them through the war, but they hadn't been any good. Used in the fire and to patch holes in the roof at Tara.

As she left the bank, she paused and watched people running like crazy. She could laugh at them for the stricken fear on their faces. The panic wasn't as bad as she had been led to believe by Will or Uncle Henry.

Her next stop was at the store, she might as well visit before going to the depot and sending the children back on the train to Charleston. They were all questions about the house on Peachtree, as if she had seen it recently. Kennedy's Emporium came into view, the gilded letters never failed to instill a feeling of happiness. This store was her pride, thank heavens she hadn't let Rhett talk her into selling the store with the mills.

"Mama can I come in please?" Ella softly begged. Ella loved the store for she was a Kennedy and even at her young age, took an interest to anything that had to do with the father she had never known.

It was on the tip of her tongue to refuse. She didn't need the children running around and ruining things. But one day this would be Ella's store, so there was no harm. Besides the old cats would see she wasn't such a horrible mother.

"Yes, but you two be on your best behavior."

They nodded eagerly as they ambled out of the stuffy carriage. She instinctively grabbed Ella's hand as they passed the window. It was sparkling clean and there seemed to be wide arrangements of products which pleased her.

Andrew Finigan, the store clerk had placed orders for new stock of calico without being told to. With only a few weeks of being out of Atlanta, she saw that her store hadn't fallen a part. But she knew she still had to keep a firm hand over them.

"How is buisness?" she asked, keeping an eye on Ella and Wade who were standing by the window and waving to people they knew as they passed by. Their chatter filled the store and she couldn't keep the slight smile from her face. The smallest things amused them...

"Fine, Mrs. Butler. But with the panic-"

"Oh, bother the panic," she lightly cut in. "Then we are making a profit?"

"Yes," he hesitantly began, "But I hope you don't mind that I paid the underclerks. I wasn't sure when you would return."

"Of course, Andrew," she graciously said. "I will rely on your sound judgment. I will be away from Atlanta for a few months. While I am gone I will want you to open a credit account."

His eyes bulged in his head, she nearly laughed. When Frank Kennedy had lost control of the store to Scarlett, credit had never been extended. He listened to her instructions with the utmost attention.

"Now promise me, you won't tell a soul, Andrew," she said.

He swore he wouldn't. But Scarlett secretly smiled as she turned away to announce to Wade and Ella they were leaving.

Andrew Finigan couldn't keep a secret if his life depended on it. By tomorrow all of Atlanta would know she extended credit. The old guard would be shocked at her 'charitable' intentions and it would surely put her in a better light. Who had it been once that had said the old guard never died nor surrendered?

Returning to the mansion for dinner was odd. Scarlett hadn't truly remembered a happy time in which she had lived in the house. Bonnie had died five months before and Melanie had followed. Through that time, since before last summer, she hadn't taken the least bit of notice of the home.

True, she had tried to keep supper and the routine of the household. The children still had sat down with her at the dinner table, Rhett absent and his plate untouched everyday. Some part of her mind had known even then that his absence had bothered her. She didn't know why she hadn't put the pieces together then.

Coming into the foyer, the house was deadly quiet and with no hint of life within. As always a darkness shrouded the house and the stain glass windows didn't give any light as they did during summer. The gloom of death, misery and coldness shrouded the house.

The children were subdued yet seemed slightly happy at seeing their home. It was the only home they had truly ever known. Even if Scarlett couldn't help but compare it to her own childhood at Tara. There had been laughter, sunshine and family in her childhood. She realized with a pang of guilt Ella and Wade hadn't known that save the stability of Rhett and Melanie in their lives.

She pushed those thoughts aside to more pressing matters as she scoured the house for help and found that the cook would be making a quick supper before they left.

"Will we live in Charleston with Uncle Rhett?" Ella asked her mother after the cook had disappered.

"Don't be ridiculous, Ella," Wade cut in. "Mother would never move to Charleston. She loves Tara. Isn't that right?" He was looking at her expectantly.

She smiled to lighten the mood, though she felt far from smiling. "I could never live in Charleston with those drawls. Yenna wan' cass ya eye 'bout Chaa'stun?"

The children burst out laughing. Scarlett smiled at their amusement. If only Rhett were here, he could see that her children weren't afraid of her as he had claimed they were. Well all in good time.

As Wade and Ella talked, Scarlett scanned through the newspaper. Her palms became clammy at the headlines. God's nightgown, the whole world was talking about the panic. She barley heard the maid as she began to set the table and paid her no heed nor the menu.

Uncle Henry had been right. She had thought he was only overreacting like an old fussy maid. Business was in turmoil and near collaspse. Oh God, why had she offered credit, whatever had possessed her? True she could afford to throw money around. She had plenty of it. But to give it to those people without any sense of how important money was.

The stock market had been closed for ten days in New York. The reporters had even gave it a name of "black Friday." Which the stock prices plunged downward because everyone was selling and not buying. American banks were closing down because people rushed there to get their money and their whole life savings were gone. Factories were closing down and thousands were without work.

So much for Henry's assurance. She had an impulse to run back to the bank but she didn't. She was certain that Rhett had handled it. She could imagine him laughing at everyone's panic. Thanks heavens Rhett had bought some of the bank shares.

The chicken had all but became soggy in the gravy. But she didn't care, she was hungry. Wade was stuffing the food in his mouth as if it would disappear. Rhett had joked that he had taken after her, to which she had glared at him and had reprimanded Wade before.

"He is a growing boy," Rhett had said many a time, "Leave him alone."

She would enjoy her meal. Taking a few more bites, she eyed the brandy decanter and wanted a drink badly. It would settle her nerves. Her fingers reached for it and Ella was watching her.

"Mama you are going to drink!"

"God's nightgown!" she cried. "I am a grown woman, Ella." Imagine that, her own daughter telling her not to drink.

"Busy body," Wade shot at Ella with a laugh. "Uncle Rhett let me have a cup before."

That was news to Scarlett. At her raised brows, Wade blushed and lowered his eyes, continuing to eat. She supposed she would have to forego her cup. She knew it would be smelt on her breath and she mustn't do anything in front of the children that they would get back to Rhett. It was just as well, for tomorrow she would be on her way to Charleston, finally her dreams would come true.

TBC


	8. Awaiting Rhett

Note: Thank you so much for the reviews! Thanks to Dracoginnylover24, Joyce LaKee, missysammy and djeanne! Here is the chapter you all have been waiting for... Scarlett in Charleston. I will post the chapter 9 either Friday or Saturday. Sorry for any spelling errors ect. Anyway please enjoy and reviews make my day :)

Part 8

Mid-October of 1873 marked a new phase in Scarlett's life as she stepped off of the train at the Charleston depot with Prissy dawdling behind her. She really should have left the girl in Charleston but had need of a lady's maid. She had a few trunks all filled with mourning clothes and simple undergarments. Most of her clothing was still in the mansion on Peachtree Street, which explained the lightness of the bags.

Her mind went back to the few hours before she had left Atlanta. She had dutifully went to see Ashley. He wasn't the boy she remembered but only a shell of himself. It had been sobering and he seemed dissapointed that she was leaving. At one time it would have excited her, but now she felt nothing. She had promised to write him. "Won't it be great fun, Ashley?" she had cheerfully asked, "Just like when you were on your trip in Europe?" She would write him periodically about the mills but her main focus was Rhett.

She was nervous and knew no one would be meeting her. Aunt Eulalie lived here but of course her aunt and her rarely corresponded and Eulalie didn't know of her arrival. Scarlett had carefully thought of all that needed to be done. She knew Rhett wasn't a fool. He would know why she had come and if she went to the Butler's she would have the risk of being publicly disgraced if he kicked her out of his mother's home. No, Rhett was too wise for his own good so she would have to be wiser. She would rent a room at the hotel for the night and send a letter to Rhett.

She stopped a cab easily, the driver was a man with a thick Charlestonian accent she detested. "Please take me to the closest hotel," she said as Prissy stood behind her with the bags.

"That would be the Charleston Hotel ma'am," he said.

She nodded and slipped into the carriage followed by Prissy. Soon the carriage moved away from Morris street. How she hated being in Charleston! She had come here once when Wade was a small baby, a little over ten years ago. Looking outside the window of the cab she saw it hadn't changed much. There were new buildings of course but Charleston had the same feel of the stuck-up class of Charlestonians for all their airs of last time, and their high talk with their long, drawling voices that couldn't even pronounce their words right.

The cab continued down the streets and moved past the blocks, thank heavens the cab driver knew where they were headed for she hadn't the faintest idea. Charleston was large enough as it was. She did enjoy watching the bustling town however and saw the women in colorful gowns and jackets, their hats blowing in the wind. A few watched her from the street with a few men of what looked like the wealthy. How proud they looked!

The carriage rocked to a stop a mile later. Scarlett alighted and a bell hop promtly came to help her with her bags as she paid the driver.

"What street is this?" she asked the bell hop.

He eyed her. "Pickney madam."

"Oh. How far from here is the Battery?"

"A few miles," he answered, pulling the bags a long with him.

That was a perfect distance. She smiled as she breathed in the fresh air and looked at Prissy. "Come a long, Prissy," she ordered. "Stop dawdling."

They came into the lobby and Scarlett noticed with delight the large chandalier and sprawling red carpet, a lighter more cheerful hue. It was soft under her feet and she felt excitement at the new feeling of a new place. Compared to Atlanta, Charleston had grace and the architecture wasn't so distasteful. Indeed, it was older and brought back memories of when she was a girl. There was something almost charming about it.

She walked up to the front desk with a smile. A polished looking man with a serious expression, looked at her over his glasses.

"Hello," she greeted calmly, in a strong voice. "I would like a room for the night. The best room available."

"Your name?"

"Mrs. Scarlett Butler."

She saw recognition dawn in his features and his eye brows shot up. He looked so ridiculous, she quelled the urge to laugh. But she remained calm and mimicked the proud, haughty look she knew so well, the one that Gerald had always used when people had tried to laugh at him because of his small stature. No man would treat her like a simpleton, even if she was a woman.

He handed her a key. "Room 415. It has the best view. If you need anything, Mrs. Butler, you can personally call me."

"Why thank you." She smiled, flashing her dimples. "Come a long Prissy."

The bell hop followed her with the bags and Prissy looked amazed at the hotel. Her eyes nearly bulged out of her face. Grabbing the train of her gown, Scarlett slowly walked up the long flight of stairs. A few children rushed past her, the boy pulling what appeared to be his sister's hair, meanwhile a discouraged parent was chasing them. She laughed, in a bright mood.

"Prissy isn't this wonderful? Better then stuffy Atlanta that's for sure." They reached the room and she turned to the gasping bell hop. "That is all thank you." She gave him a generous tip.

"Thank you ma'am," he murmured and promptly departed. Opening the door with the skeleton key she came into the spacious room. Prissy carried the bags to the corner. She viewed the room with a critical eye of one who knew architecture. There was a fireplace and mantle. An Italian mirror hung over the fireplace and there was a simple bed with French paintings on the sand colored walls. Going to the window, she looked out of the shutters and saw an extensive view, high above the streets, across Charleston with dozens of steeples proudly standing and reaching high into the air.

It was noon yet and despite the cooler temperature, the sky had a light bluish gray tint. Opening the shutters and window, she delightfully breathed in the fresh air and sighed. She was suddenly glad she had come to Charleston. Maybe the war had changed this city, she was hoping it would be a lot more fun. For she would have so much fun with Rhett, she would see to it. She thought back to the fun they had on their honeymoon in New Orleans. "Marriage can be fun," he had said, and it had been at first...

"Now Prissy," she said, turning from the window. "I am going to write Mister Rhett a letter and you will deliver it to him." She was all ready sitting at the desk and pulling out a pen to write him a letter.

"Lawdy!" Prissy cried. "Miss Scarlett, I doan know nothin' 'bout Charleston. I's will get lost fer sure. I doan even know where Mistha Rhett is-"

"Oh hush. I have the address and someone will direct you. I pay you well enough that you shouldn't be whining so." She rummaged through the drawer and found a sheet of stationary. Drumming her chin lightly, she thought of what to say. She mustn't sound too formal yet not too anxious.

Rhett,

I have come to join you in Charleston. I have rented a room at the Charleston Hotel on Pickney Street. I do believe you know where it is. I will be waiting for you to meet me.

Yours, Scarlett

She re-read the note critically. It sounded frank enough. Folding the letter, she pushed back the mahogany chair and rose, handing the letter to Prissy. "There, and don't come back until you deliver it." She handed the girl the address sprawled across a torn piece of paper. "And if you don't deliver it, Prissy I am liable to take a strap to you. You may be free but you work for me and I pay you well enough."

"Yes, Miss Scarlett," Prissy sighed. "I's will return."

Scarlett questioned her actions in giving her the letter. She eyed Prissy as she went to the door and disappered. The door shut and she fell back on the bed with a sigh. She wouldn't need to unpack for she was sure he would come and even more certain she would get him to let her stay in Charleston.

(A Few Hours Later)

Hours passed, the clock now read four o'clock and the sky was darkening to a dark shade of angry gray. The wind blew more fierce against the shutters and seemed to resound in Scarlett's ears. Prissy had returned at one o'clock but Scarlett had sent her off on some errands and had paid her generously enough to keep that silly girl busy for hours.

Rhett hadn't come.

"Did he get the letter?" Scarlett had demanded.

"Yes'm."

"Well what did he say?" She was dying to know about Rhett. But Prissy slowly began to talk about her walk there. "Great balls of fire! What did Mistha Rhett say?"

"Well'm. He looked right angry. I ain't never been frightned in all mah life. Not even when we done help Miss Melly give birth to-"

"Never mind about that! Tell me what he said."

"He say, 'Tell yer mistress I'll come when I'm good and ready and not a minute 'fore.' He seemed busy and der was a lot of people der. Plenty of gempum and woman dressed all fancy. Dey-"

"Enough about them," she cut in. "Did- did he say anything else?"

"No, Miss Scarlett. He paid me for my troubles and sent me 'way."

"Oh," she murmured, disappointed. Well, she wouldn't wait. She would have a nap and then go downstairs for a cup of tea. Hence she sent Prissy away and was grateful for the girl's absence.

Now it was three hours later. She had tried in vain to sleep but she couldn't. Her nerves were raw and the chiming of the clock and the pounding of the wind against the windows put her on edge. Where was he? She knew he was probably trying to get her back for all the past things she had done to him.

"None of that matters. I know he will come," she said a loud. "He can't stay away from me. He just can't." Feeling more assured, she put on her fur coat and left the room. People passed her in the hall way and she was grateful for the noise. It was better than her own thoughts.

The same man with glasses was at the front desk. He seemed surprised at seeing her but gave her a smile. "Do you need anything Mrs. Butler?"

"Yes, will you please direct anyone to the dining hall that is looking me."

He nodded and Scarlett left the desk, looking around. She knew it was uncommon for a woman in mourning to go around, but she was glad for once that no one knew her. She was only a nameless face in the crowd. Entering the dining hall she saw many couples sitting and enjoying supper. The smell of heaping plates of food reached her nose, and she felt hungry. But she knew she couldn't eat a bite, with her stomach turning the way it was at thoughts of finally seeing Rhett.

She ordered tea and felt uncomfortrable at being alone. She must look a sad sight, in mourning clothes, looking like a crow. The waiter came promptly with her tea and she drank the warm liquid, her thoughts wandering to times before when she would have tea with Melanie and the old guard when Melanie would force them to accept her into their social circle... She forced herself not to think about Melly.

She sat their for a while, lost in her own world. Her eyes would flicker with thoughts but became hazy. The warmth of the tea was slowly warming her up and making her relax. Even her tired body and aching back was momentarly forgotten. She thought of Rhett and the agony of Melanie's death. And she frowned, a hard look coming into her eyes. She swore in that moment she would never be licked or let tragedy make her broken. And she quietly contemplated that she would get Rhett back, even if it killed her. Just how she would, she was not sure but she had time to figure that out.

"Mrs. Butler I presume," a voice drawled, floating through the fog of her mind and she froze, her eyes coming in contact with Rhett.

TBC


	9. The Battle Has Just Begun

Note: Thank you djeanna, Joyce LaKee and Cornorama for your wonderful reviews! Here is the next part and I hope you all enjoy. :)

Part 9

Scarlett's eyes came in contact with the strong chest of Rhett and her eyes roved up to his face. A Panama hat was tipped on his head and his face seemed even more swarthy then she remembered. He had lost some of the puffiness from all the drinking he had done after Bonnie's death and seemed to be the Rhett she remembered him, strong, masculine and fit. There was a slight hollowness about his high cheekbones but the tan made up for it, even if there she could still tell he had been drinking a lot.

Her eyes drank in the sight of him. He wore a dust-colored coat and his trousers were slightly darker. His waistcoat was collarless with a dark red necktie that contrasted nicely wiht his white underhsirt and skin. A fur-lined overcoat and tan gloves completed his look.

She couldn't keep the sudden smile that came to her face. He's here, she numbly thought, he's here! The time they had been seperated had seemed like eternity and she rose up, impulsively to throw her arms around him in exaltation but the look he gave her, stopped her.

"What are you doing here?" he asked in a low voice, so that the others couldn't over hear.

Her smile faded and she stepped back, her eyes narrowing in defense. But she knew one could catch more flies with honey. She smiled lightly, flashing her dimples. "I all ready told you in my letter to see you. Atlanta was just awful. Aren't you glad to see me?" She didn't add that it was awful for he wasn't there. She knew she mustn't give him too much power over her.

"No," he said. His brows rose at her glare. "I shouldn't have put it past you. In fact I was expecting you. I knew you would come here. But then again you just so happen to come to Charleston when you and I both know you detest it?"

"So do you," she shot back. "Besides isn't a wife's place with her husband?"

"Not in our case, Scarlett. You do remember our conversation the night Miss Melanie died?"

She couldn't believe he was speaking of Melanie. It hurt too much to remember her. He should be happy to see her. They should be talking about their future, not their past. The sudden smile that had been on her lips faded.

"Yes, I remember."

"But this isn't a place for a discussion," he was saying, "Come on."

"Oh fine. You needn't get in such a huff." She threw money on the table and trailed after his long strides. "Where are we going?"

"To your room." Suddenly his arm clamped around her, his arms encircling her shoulders. The heat of his body was exhilarating and she could scarcely breathe. "Smile, you don't want anyone to know something is amiss." She forced herself to smile as her and Rhett moved together towards the stairs. Suddenly he released her at the foot of the stairs, the man at the front desk, was watching them with great interest, Scarlett averted her gaze and looked up at Rhett..

"Rhett-" She felt cornered and that was a feeling she didn't like. It wouldn't be a good idea to be alone with him. And if there was one thing she read in Rhett's eyes was irritation, and an underlying anger he was keeping controlled. But with Rhett, one never knew.

"Come on," he ordered again, his mouth turning down as he grabbed her wrist and nearly dragged her up the first few steps. She felt the instinct of defense rise up within her at his harsh treatment and yanked her wrist from his grasp.

"You're hurting me," she hissed, mindful of others. "You needn't drag me. I am perfectly capable of walking." She lifted her chin and her train with one hand and continued up the stairs, Rhett following closely behind her.

She paused in front of her room and opened the door. She heard his footsteps behind her as he strolled in and then heard the door shut. She felt liked a caged animal as she carelessly threw down her gloves on the bed and sat down. Her eyes met his across the room. He was standing with his back braced against the door and hands buried in his pockets.

"What are you really doing here?" he demanded. His eyes flickered with irriation and some amusement, just what emotion it was, she couldn't be sure. "I know it wasn't your love for Charleston that drove you to leave that monastary not to mention Wade and Ella."

She heard his sarcasm. She would swllow her sharp retort and defense that she was a good mother.

"Now don't be mean, Rhett. The children are at Tara. You know that I missed you."

"Indeed? That is a change. But unfortunately I didn't miss you and I'm plainly telling you that I don't love you and that I don't want you here. I won't spare your feelings with lies, I all ready told you this the day of Miss Melly's funeral."

"But you do love me! I love you, you must believe me. If only you wouldn't be so mean and let me explain-" She rose to her feet and thought of some way to appease him but could not come up with anything. She stomped her foot. "Why are you being so nasty when you know that I-"

He sighed, "Scarlett, let's not go through this again. I can't bear to see you so humble. I know you believe that you love me. But you don't. It's only infatuation and it will wear off."

"No, I'll always love you until I die, Rhett. I've never loved anyone as I love you, not even Ashley..."

"Lord," he breathed, "I can even sympathize with the wooden headed, Mr. Wilkes."

"What?"

"Nothing." His lip tilted down mockingly but his expression sobered. "You're leaving on the first train tomorrow, Scarlett, even if I have to forcefully carry you through the streets of Charleston to the depot." It was a warning.

Her brows slanted. "Threaten me all you want, Rhett but your mother would be so disappointed to see me go. And I am rather enjoying Charleston. I'm not leaving until I am good and ready," she shortly said, her eyes lowering lest he see her triumph.

His eyes flickered as he crossed his arms. He seemed not the least dazed. "Fortunately my mother doesn't know of your arrival or does Rosemary."

"Oh but you're wrong," she quickly said. "I sent your mother a telegram telling her of my arrival just before I left Tara."

She hoped he couldn't see past her lie. He always knew when she was lying but maybe this time he wouldn't. She smiled up at him through her lashes, hoping to disarm him.

His mouth twitched as if he were amused but he looked far from amused. "You're lying."

"I am not!" she denied, feeling cornered. This was her last hope to make Rhett let her stay.

"I could always read you like a book, you know," he lightly said. His eyes flickered with some strange expression, she couldn't name and he folded his arms across his chest. She held her breath as his eyes roved up and down her body, suddenly he laughed lightly.

"You think you have won the battle my dear but it has just begun. Very well, I'll let you stay in Charleston for my mother's sake becuase I know you'll raise hell if I try yo get rid of you. I'll even act the part of the dutiful and loving husband in public. I'll send for the children and we'll be the picture of the happy family. But as for behind closed doors, we'll be the strangers we've always been. And I'll even give you a free reign with my money as long as you control yourself. Is that fair?"

Scarlett didn't know whether to be angry at him for his coldness or grudgingly consent. But he did offer her free reign with his money and she thought of all the things she could do. She hadn't expected it to be so easy. With all her upbringing from Mammy and Ellen, she had long ago cast aside, she could charm Charleston and win back Rhett's heart by Christmas and with the children here, why they would be a perfect family. She smiled. He was watching her with an amused expression, thank heavens he had some light back in his eyes, Scarlett thought.

"Very well Rhett. As long as you don't go back on our deal. And just so I know how much money?" It made her think of the panic, she would have to ask him that later. But now was hardly the time to question him about money matters...

He shrugged. "We'll finish this discussion later." His eyes roved the room. "I see you haven't unpacked your bags. Bring them down to the lobby and I'll go find the uncompetent Prissy."

"Aren't you going to help me?"

"If you can face Sherman, I believe you can handle a few bags." He threw over his shoulder as he walked out of the door, closing it behind him. Scarlett looked at the bags with frustration. By tonight, Rhett would be singing a different tune. Somehow she knew she couldn't bribe him to do her bidding as other men. But she smiled just the same as her eyes lingered at the door, things were turning out just as exactly as she had thought.

Later, as they stood out in front of the hotel with her bags and Prissy, Rhett hailed a cab. Once the bags were secure, Prissy entered the cab and Scarlett felt her heart accelerate as he offered his hand to her. She spared a glance upward, meeting his eyes. There was no emotion in them, not even love but a neutral look. His eyes looked like twin dark coals, burning and consuming her train of thought. His lip tilted down and his brow skidded up.

"Well madam are you going to enter the carriage or stand here all day?"

"No," she airily said, regaining her composure. He seemed irritated yet amused at the same time, if such an emotion was possible. She took his hand as indifferently as possible but even the barest contact with his skin was putting her mind in a haze. His hand was large and warm to the touch as it closed over hers and she placed one booted foot forward and sat next to Prissy, arranging her skirts. Rhett followed suit and the door was closed behind him.

Scant light poured in from the window and played against Rhett's hair. Scarlett tried to slow the mad beating of her heart but he was so close! The carriage rocked forward and Prissy began to chatter but she couldn't make a sense of what she was saying. Then Rhett spoke and his deep voice so close to her befuddled her. She didn't know why he had never affected her so, but his proximity was turning her into a fool and making her speechless. She forced herself to look over at him with a calm and leveled gaze.

"The children will be so glad to see you when they come to Charleston."

"I'll be happy to see them," he politely said.

His silence unnerved her and she thought of some way to liven him up but couldn't think of a thing. How she missed their talks, even banters with one another. But now he was only showing a polite curiosity, and indifference to her. His barbs would have been preferable, for at least that would show he did care.

"I suppose I'll visit aunt 'Lalie tomorrow. And send for the children," she said, trying to break the silence. He didn't say anything and Scarlett sat more back with a sigh. Fine then, she wouldn't try to have a conversation with him. After ten minutes of silence and feeling as if they would never get to the Battery, the cab rounded the corner and slowed its pace. She saw many houses but one in particualr caught her eyes. It was a house that was tall and elegantly built.

"Oh, Rhett!" she exclaimed. "What a lovely house!"

"That's my mother's home," he said as the cab stopped.

He moved away from Scarlett and alighted the cab, holding out a hand to her. She took his hand again and her feet touched the solid ground. He didn't hold her hand a moment longer then necessary she noted with a frown. She watched Rhett through lowered eyes as he paid the cab driver as the bags were set down on the ground.

She stood on the sidewalk, transfixed at the beautiful architecture of the house before her. It had a deep piazza around the house with thick white columns. There were so many long, wide stretching windows and the house seemed to gleam against the gray background of the sky and the giant live oaks surrounding the two story home. A beautifully kept yard and black iron fence completed the picture. It briefly reminded her of Tara but one couldn't mistaken this place for a simple county home.

"Oh, Rhett," she breathed, "the darling thing. I think it is even more charming then our home in Atlanta."

"At least your tastes have seemed to change," he said as he paid the driver. Scarlett was so enraptured with the house she didn't notice as Rhett took her arm and led her forward. He opened the gate she went through, keeping her pace light and unhurried. Head held high she felt Rhett's gaze bore into her as she walked up the steps and the door was opened by the butler. He took their hats and coats. And an older woman who seemed to be the maid, rounded the corner.

"Hello Lucille," Rhett greeted familiarly. "I have aquired my wife."

Lucille's eyes widened briefly, rolling white in her dark face they walked in to the main hall. Scarlett smiled charmingly at the surprised Lucille as she scurried off to get Eleanor. Looking around with her keen eyes she saw the hall was extensive with many pictures hanging on the white walls with a hard-wood floor and a few deep, burgundy oriental carpets. There were many doors on each side of the hallway. A large, gilded chandelier hung from the ceiling and the window shutters were open flooding the foyer with light. A staircase wound in a curve to the second floor. It looked as equally charming inside as the outside, Scarlett thought. For she was used to the dark hues of burgundy and little light in the mansion.

"Rhett... Scarlett," a soft drawl said with excitement. Finding the source she saw Rhett's mother for the second time since Rhett and her had been married. She was a stoutly woman that was no means plump but had the round curves of a sixty-five year old woman. Her hair was gray and piled high atop her head but the twinkle in her dark eyes, so much like Rhett's but with warmth and feeling, belied her age. Her full lips were curved and the train of her tan dress made a rushing sound as she rushed over to Scarlett.

Scarlett realized she was rudely staring and smiled with all the charm she could muster. She could tell it worked for Mrs. Butler's smile was just as large and she embraced her with no hesitation and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"I'm so glad to see you. Did that son of mine finally invite you to come for a visit? I was appalled when he showed up without you and told me the sad news about your sister-in-law, Mrs. Wilkes, was her name?"

Scarlett nodded, she couldn't speak for she was so happy to finally be somewhere that she was welcomed and a place that was warm and gay, not like Atlanta or Tara with Suellen. She blinked at her tears. I won't cry, she quickly thought.

"Oh Scarlett, forgive me for being so thoughtless. You look so tired... Life hasn't been easy has it?"

Scarlett shook her head, she still didn't trust herself to speak. She saw felt Rhett watching her but didn't meet his gaze. Eleanor embraced her.

"My dear! Come into the parlor and we'll have a nice cup of tea and you can tell me news of Atlanta. Rhett always said it was so fast paced." She turned her attention to Rhett. "Go find that sister of yours and tell her that Scarlett has come."

"At your service mama," he said with an elegant bow but a slight grin on his face. Scarlett hadn't seen Rhett so carefree as he was around Eleanor except for Bonnie but she couldn't think about Bonnie now. The bond between mother and son was evident. He rounded the corner, disappearing and Eleanor led her into the parlor. Scarlett couldn't help but keep her eyes on Rhett until he was out of sight. Eleanor ordered Prissy to take her bags to Rhett's room on the top floor.

Eleanor proceeded to sit her down on a comfortable settee and ordered Lucille to bring them tea. Scarlett felt in such high spirits as Eleanor talked about Charleston and Aunt Eulaie. After a cup of tea, she heard the sound of Rhett's voice and a woman's in the hall. That was when Rhett appeared at the parlor door and looking to his right, she saw a tall, stylish woman in her early thirties. The dark hair under a stylish hat with feathers and plums was too obvious and an exact resemblance of the dark haired Butlers. She knew this woman whose shoulders nearly were leveled to Rhett's was Rosemary Butler.

"Scarlett," Rosemary spoke for the first time. Her voice had a deep and strong timbre and her dark eyes were dancing. "I am pleased to finally meet you. Rhett kept you away too long."

She didn't know what to think of Rosemary Butler but she seemed kind enough and she was Rhett's beloved sister. Pulling all of her charm she possessed, she smiled. "He certainly did. And we must be good friends, we are like sisters after all. I have heard so much about you from Rhett... But I suppose I am chattering on so..."

Rosemary laughed. "Not at all. I never had any use for women who only said, "please." and, "how do you do?" Those women are a bore. But I can see why Rhett married you." Her eyes danced with some unknown secret as she shot her brother a mischievous glance.

Scarlett's eyes met Rhett's dark ones. His lip was tilted down somewhat cynically as he dryly laughed, "Ah, yes I do believe this is our fifth year of wedded bliss. Is it not darling?" His lips uttered the words pleasantly but his eyes had a flicker of mockingness. His shoulders seemed even broader and his immaculate tailored suit contrasted with his brooding face and dark eyes. Her voice was lost to her as if stricken dumb but when she saw the triumph in his eyes at rendering her speechless, her chin raised.

"Rhett darling, how you do run on." She turned her attention back to Rosemary and Eleanor. "One look at Rhett sent my poor heart soaring. He was so dashing and not to mention a hero. Well, I do admit he was rude a few times but I just couldn't stay angry with him very long." She smiled and slanted a look at Rhett.

Eleanor laughed. "Rhett you must take Scarlett up to the room. I know she must be dreadfully tired with the trip and all that she has been through. I must assist the cook with a special dinner. I want only the best for my children."

"Now I know why I love you so much," Rhett murmured, strolling over to Eleanor's sitting form and throwing an arm around her shoulders and pulling her closer to him. He gave her a smacking kiss to her cheek. "You are so wonderful, mama."

"Just for that, Rhett Butler, there might be crab soup."

"Ah, the maternal instincts. Thank God for them," he drawled. Scarlett looked away. Rhett never acted that open with her even in Atlanta, even before he had left her. He had with Bonnie and the children. She had once thought it was because he didn't love her. But he did, she knew he did. She saw Rhett move towards the door, at last they would truly be alone before supper...

TBC


	10. Night

Happy Valentines Day everyone. I will post chapter 11 on Saturday :) Thanks once again to djeanne, Mrs. Scarlettbutler, Joyce LaKee and missysammy. :) You all made my day and I hope you enjoy chapter 10.

Part 10

Rosmary and Eleanor preceded Rhett and left the parlor, leaving Scarlett and Rhett alone. Rhett bowed elegantly as she made her way out of the parlor and he followed. Scarlett could feel the tension pulsating though the air as Rhett and her wordlessly made their way up the stairs to the second floor. The floor reminded her a lot like a ship, it was plain yet something about the plain hardwood floor was elegant. She waited for Rhett until he came to a whitewashed door to the left and opened it.

She entered and saw the room was overwhelmingly masculine. There was a desk, a few upholstered chairs and one large french window to the east. There was a dresser also and one large oval mirror hanging directly in front of the four poster bed on the sand colored wall. Nothing was striking about the room except that it was his. It looked unoccupied for it was neat to a fault, but Scarlett knew this was indeed Rhett's room. She could smell the faint smell of cigars and saw a decanter of brandy on the desk.

Scarlett turned towards Rhett after her inspection and smiled, hoping to win a smile or a word from him. But he merely observed her, leaning against the door nochantly. She wondered if he would speak or help her dress. She blushed awkwardly.

"Well?" she finally asked.

His brows rose. "Well what?"

"Aren't you going to help me dress?" she asked, blushing a deeper shade.

His eyes roamed over her body as if eyeing a horse. "No, I'll send Lucille up." He turned on his heel and left, shutting the door behind him. She heard his footsteps disappear down the hall.

After a supper of crab soup and at least three courses, Scarlett lay under the fresh sheets with her blue nightgown on and hair unbound, the only color she had worn in weeks. She idly played with her sleeve and wondered where Rhett was. The clock on the side board read ten o'clock and she hadn't seen him for two hours since leaving the parlor.

Lucille had helped her dress into her nightgown, her mind replaying the events of supper. The conversation had been most enjoyable with Rosemary's talk of Europe. Supper had went well except for Rhett balantly ignoring her most of the time.

Oh, well all that will change, she thought as she lightly slid off of the bed and went to inspect herself in the mirror. She had all ready given her hair the usual one hundred strokes but she grabbed her brush and quickly, brushing a few extra times until it looked like it shun. She did still look pale but her eyes did look more becoming.

Hearing footsteps sent her quickly running for the bed. She placed the sheets quickly around her and smoothed her hair. Placing her face into placid lines she lightly smiled as the door opened and she saw Rhett. His coat was off and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His cape was carelessly draped over his shoulder and he had a cigar hanging from his mouth as he shut the door behind him. The room seemed even smaller compared to his broad shoulders that seemed to consume the room.

"Hello," she calmly said with a smile and lowered her eyes. She felt as nervous as a bride but forced herself to raise her eyes to his. But he wasn't looking at her. He threw his cape on a chair and began to untie his caveat. Throwing it carelessly down, he took his cigar and squashed out the stub on a ashtray.

"I see you got undressed with no trouble," he observed after a moment of silence. He strode over to her side of the bed so suddenly her heart stopped and pulse drummed in excitement. He's going to kiss me, she thought. And she wanted nothing more but instead of taking her in his arms, he staid back. "Get up."

"What?" She tried to not let her befuddlement show but failed as her eyes met his. "Rhett, why on earth would I-"

"Get up," he ordered and when she refused to move she felt his hands on her arms as he pulled her up as if she weighed no more then a rag doll and pulled her onto her feet. He moved past her and bent over, pulling a coverlet from the bed and throwing it on the floor. He threw a couple of pillows on the floor also.

"Why, Rhett! What on earth are you doing?" It then dawned on her. "You don't expect me to sleep-"

"I wouldn't dream of making Scarlett O'Hara sleep on the floor. Well, I told you I wouldn't be a loving husband to you didn't I? I'll be sleeping on the floor tonight."

"But-" she protested but her protest died in her throat. "Fine then. It doesn't bother me one bit.. You could sleep outside for all I care and I wouldn't loose any sleep, Rhett Butler." She moved past him as he kneeled down to arrange the heap of coverlets and pillows on the floor.

He looked up at her perched on the bed. He rose to his feet and snuffed out the lantern. She was still sitting on the bed and only a scant bit of moonlight shun in. She could see the outline of his body as he moved around the room and heard the sound of him undressing. Her face flamed as she quickly slid under the coverlet and pulled the blankets to her chin. She tried to avert her gaze but curiosity got the better of her as she got a dark glimpse of Rhett placing his robe on and saw him tie the belt. It amazed her that he slept naked come winter or summer. She knew he was only wearing the robe for modesty, for once she damned his modesty. She blushed at her train of thoughts.

"You can stop watching me undress, Scarlett," he said, with some amusement in his voice.

"I don't know what you mean," she lied.

He didn't reply but she saw him kneel down and lay his long body down on the coverlet and arrange the pillows under his head. She heard him sigh. "You're still the worst liar. I won't have you lying to me or pulling your childish schemes in an attempt to win my affections. After New Years I'm sending you back to Atlanta. No objections I hope."

It was on the tip of her tongue to fight and protest but she held back a retort. "No..." and after a moment, "Are you terribly uncomfortable?"

"I've slept in worst conditions." She saw him somehow manage to light a match in the dark and saw the deep glow of his cigar as he deeply exhaled. She curiously watched him in the darkness of the night. She hadn't paid him much heed but now there was something about him she couldn't understand. Something waiting to be grasped. He had always mystified her and thrilled her.

"Is it when your father kicked you out?" she asked with a yawn. She was tired but she wanted to hear his deep voice. She drowsily remembered how he had once told her how his father had disowned him.

"Yes. If he could see me now he would see a son richer then the president and him dead in his grave." She saw him stub out his cigar and turn over, his back facing her.

"Good night, Scarlett."

"Good night, Rhett," she echoed. She tried to sleep but her mind refused to let her. This night wasn't turning out like she had expected. Rhett wasn't in her bed and might as well be millions of miles away. She frowned like an displeased child and spent most of the night plotting on ways to lure him into her bed.

TBC


	11. Walk near the Harbor

To Tuduvant who pleaded for me to post the next part. And to Cornorama who answered a question I needed help with. I hope I understood what you said, and if not please correct me. I wouldn't want to purposely not listen to your advice :)

And of course...

Raicheal, Joyce LaKee, djeanne, guitarhorselover, missysammy and Eugenia Victoria, thank you all! I hope this chapter isn't too boring but there will be more action in the next chapter. I hope you enjoy.

Part 11

The next morning Scarlett found herself walking beside Rhett. He was giving her a proper tour of Charleston after Eleanor had insisted. She could tell he wasn't too pleased, but she didn't care. She was so happy to be near him and see the new sights of the harbor. Last night had been terrible but she had hope for today.

His body had relaxed considerably beside her and she could hear the passion in his voice as he talked about Charleston. No matter how much he said he hated it, she knew this city was a part of him, as Tara was a part of her.

Charleston had always been a city that didn't know defeat. During 1828, the year Rhett was born, the nullification crisis arose. South Carolina had threatened to succeed from the Union, calling the high tariff the tariff of abominations and believing they could nullify any federal law they found unconstitutional. Because of the tariffs on imported goods, England had curtailed imports of US cotton and tobacco. Thus South Carolina had threatened succession from the Union in an act of defiance.

President Andrew Jackson had been furious with the Charlestonians rebellious talk led by John C. Calhoun. There had even been threats of sending troops down to Charleston and a threat of war. The president had said nullification was illegal and disunion would be treated as treason. By 1833, the crisis had ended with a compromise that lowered the tariff, but for South Carolina, talk of succession would happen again years later. And twenty seven years later, South Carolina was the first to succeed from the Union.

It didn't matter that General Sherman had marched through the Carolinas and had humbled South Carolina with scorched earth, and the South had known defeat. It didn't matter that parts of the land was still ravaged by a war that had passed nearly a decade before and Federal troops still remained to antagonize southerners. South Carolina still held on to its grace and charm.

Scarlett, couldn't see all of this of course. Her mind wasn't focused on such matters but on Rhett. She walked slowly besides him, her arm in his and they made the picture of the happily married couple as they walked a long the boardwalk. The passion in his voice was unmistakble and the setting seemed to lower his defenses and make him much more pleasant. She felt a thrill of happiness course through her. She hung onto his words, the deep tone of his voice thrilled her beyond words, though she didn't grasp the words he spoke she still was silent.

After walking halfway across the boardwalk, Rhett halted and she followed his eyes, across the murky water to what she knew was the famous Fort Sumnter. Scarlett couldn't help but think of the airs Charlestonians had taken upon themselves of being the place where the war had begun!

"Fort Sumnter, the Charlestonian's pride," Rhett quipped.

She looked at the monuments commemorating that day. "Fiddle-dee-dee, Rhett. One would hear people talk as if they had won the war."

He smiled slightly. "But if you remember my dear, the South bombarded the Union forces in the fort and won if I believe correctly."

She was about to reply when an older man joined in on their conversation. He had white scraggly hair and a wrinkled face. His clothes were slightly worn and he looked to be about in his early sixties as he stood next to Scarlett, and placed his arms over the railing. She felt a slight irritation and it must have shown in her eyes for Rhett bit back a smile but the man was oblivious to her mood.

"Did you know tis' is where the war started young lady?" the man asked in a voice heavily accented with an Irish brogue. She stiffened immediately, just like pa, he seemed so familiar for he reminded her exactly like Gerald O'Hara with blue eyes and a short stature.

"Yes," she murmured, wishing Rhett and her would be left alone but he continued on.

"What a day. St. Michael's bell tolled four times and then there was the sounds of cannons and explosions. It nearly rocked the houses and everyone watched from their windows. We went on our roof to see the South lick those meddling Yankees..." He focused his attention on Rhett.

"Do you remember that day, lad?"

"Unfortunately I wasn't in Charleston," Rhett replied.

Scarlett sighed and looked out at the rolling waves. She hoped there wouldn't be more talk of war but luckily the man bid them a good day and staggered on. Only then did she realize he had been drunk and she felt a sense of loss as the man left, as if pa was leaving all over again, it was strange she knew. And she heard a familiar sound, he was singin peg'd in a low back car. She stiffened as she thought of how pa had sang that song. She bit her lip.

Rhett's eyes searched hers. "Are you all right, Scarlett, you are as stiff as a board. Surely that man didn't bother you that much."

"It's nothing," she shortly said. "Let's continue walking."

"You're lying. Something is wrong."

Suddenly she turned towards him, eyes blazing her eyes not filled with the usual affection but fire. Her emotions had changed so rapidly but Rhett didn't seem affected. "As if you would care," she said. "Remember you didn't give a damn what happened to me or how I felt." The fire left her eyes and she sighed. "He was singing the song pa used to sing."

"I'm sorry, Scarlett, I know how much your father meant to you," he soothed. "You take after him, you know."

She smiled at that, her earlier outburst of anger forgotten. She wondered tha change in Rhetyt's mood but was happy for it.

"He was really sweet, Rhett. Oh, he could roar with the worst temper but he had the biggest heart and couldn't bear to see anyone hurt."

She stopped speaking suddenly as a man staggered past her. He reeked so that she turned her head sligthly away and as soon as the man was out of earshot she whsipered, "He was drunk too!"

His brows rose. "You and I aren't the only ones that enjoy our brandy. He is alwaying wandering a long the harbor for as long as I can remember. He smokes his pipe and looks out, remembering the glory of the South." He said the last words mockingly.

"How depressing! Oh, let's not talk about something so gloomy." She smiled brightly at him and placed her arm through his as they began to walk again.

She pushed thoughts about pa from her mind and thought about Rhett. She loved the feel of his strong and able muscles beneath her fingertips and felt the eyes of women looking at her with envy. Rhett and her had always been an handsome couple and she was proud of it. She didn't know why she didn't realize ages ago that she loved him and how attractive he was.

"I just don't see why people take it upon themselves to speak about the old days," she said. "None of that matters anymore. The war is over and people should make the best of it. We have."

Rhett laughed. "My little idealist, people will always talk about the war. Our grandchildren will long talk about the war when we are in our graves."

Suddenly she felt his arm stiffen beneath her fingers and a muscle twitched in his jaw. She stared at him confusingly before it dawned on her. He was remembering Bonnie. Rhett and her wouldn't have grandchildren because Bonnie was gone... gone.

"We should head back," he curtly said.

"Oh but Rhett!" she protested, she was enjoying their time alone. Why did it have to be ruined remembering about Bonnie and pa? She wanted to forget!

"Do we have to? Can't we go a little further, the women are pea green envy seeing me with you." She smiled charmingly at him as she always had when she wanted her way, he surely wasn't immune to her. She covered any affect that Bonnie's name had on her with a smile and the lowering of her lashes.

"Very well," he allowed, his eyes seemed vacant as hers met his. "It's my duty to make sure my wife is satisfied. We wouldn't want them to catch on that we aren't happily married would we?"

She frowned, her eyes meeting his. "How you do run on darling. I love being married to you."

He snorted beside her and she felt a foolish pleasure rise up in her that she had been the one to make him be somewhat amused, even if he seemed less joyous. The wind gently ruffled his hair and she felt she couldn't keep her eyes from him. He was really a fine specimen of a man, and just why she hadn't noticed it before, she didn't know. For she had always noticed such things.

"You're staring Scarlett," he chided with a conceited grin. "You look like a lovesick school girl."

"I do not," she denied, looking forward and smiling politely as a woman passed them and bid them a good day. "As it is I am going to visit Aunt 'Lalie today."

A seagull sounded in the distance and the waves soothed her. She felt great frustration beside Rhett. If only she could close that chasm between them and the thought of making him fall madly in love with her and admit it, brought a smile to her face. She was sure he was but the thought of him taking back his words that he didn't love her would be satisfying.

Rhett chuckled. "If I didn't know any better my pet, I'd say you were devising plans to make me fall to your charms."

"How-" she began but was cut off by a intruder. A woman who was fashionably dressed and walking past them.

"Hello Rhett," the woman said a little too familiarly for Scarlett's liking.

She appraised the woman. She was only slightly taller then her five feet two inches, with honey colored hair and pale skin. Her features weren't striking but her eyes were brown and they were staring at Rhett, with unconcealed admiration that irked her not to mention the fact that the woman was dressed to the height of fashion with an attractive green colored dress, which had always been her color. It made her tighten her hold on his arm. His eyes met hers with amusement as did the woman's.

Scarlett's brow delicately arched. "Darling aren't you going to introduce me?" she asked, her voice dripping with honey.

"Of course. Scarlett this is Mrs. Sally Bright, Sally this is my wife."

She visibly relaxed, the woman was married. She smiled charmingly and offered her hand.

"Hello, Mrs. Bright. I am pleased to meet you and you simply must call on us. I'm sure Eleanor and Rosemary would love to see you also." There, now Rhett wouldn't think she was jealous over him.

"Mrs. Butler I do believe you'll see a lot of me," Sally said, her eyes going to Rhett. "And of course I will see you soon, Rhett."

He inclined his head slightly. "Of course Sally. Do give your husband my regards."

She laughed. "Oh I shall. Good day." She passed her and Rhett.

Scarlett was glad that horrid woman was gone. The nerve of her looking at Rhett that way. She curbed her tongue from telling Rhett what an awful woman she was, it would never do for him to know she was jealous. But she assured herself, she was far better looking then that mousy Sally Bright, she didn't have an inch of color in her face...

Aunt Eulalie lived on the east of the Battery that faced the Charleston Harbor, right across the street from the Butler's. It was mystifying to her how silly Eulalie could be such good friends with Eleanor. Eleanor was taking a nap and Rosemary was reading a book in the parlor. Rhett had left as soon as taking her home from their walk, saying he had a meeting. Visiting with Eulalie was better then no one at all.

Crossing the street, she saw Eulalie's home and would have noticed it from anywhere. The high walled garden covered the house from sight. She had once thought it a prison, well thank heavens she weren't staying here. She took a steadying breath and breathed in the salty harbor air. It was soothing somehow. She never enjoyed visits with her aunts for they were always talking about her conduct or begging for money.

It was dark as she walked into the yard and up the steps, for the high wall let little sunlight stream in and had always given Scarlett the feeling of a prison with no view. Knocking on the door, she heard the rustling of someone within the white washed walls and the door was opened by Eulalie herself. Her aunt's face was befuddled, then she peered at her and smiled.

"Oh Scarlett! What are you doing in Charleston? Do come in and set your stuff down." She was all ready pulling her into the house. "Martha," she said to the maid, "Please bring us a tray of tea."

Eulalie led her to the small parlor with a couple of stuffy chairs that were out of date and an old piano. She sat her down on the settee. She was beaming and folded her hands as she peered at Scarlett.

Looking around the parlor, Scarlett saw the room badly in need of dusting and the walls slightly cracked in some places. The house looked desolate. It was a good thing I send her money, she thought, or this house would be down around her ears.

"Scarlett," Eulalie said. "You look so much like your mother. I haven't seen you for years and now that you're finally here I'm so happy. I heard you gave up the mills from Pauline and I am so glad."

It was on the tip of her tongue to tell her aunt that she wasn't glad that she had given up the mills. They had been her pride and joy and the only reason she had was she was certain Rhett had something to do with the mysterious money Ashley had received. Aunt Pauline's last letter had been so hateful about her conduct at the mills, that Scarlett wasn't sure if she would ever forgive her.

She forced a smile. "I am too Aunt 'Lalie. But do tell me the news in Charleston, it's been so long since I've been here." It galled her, but she smiled charmingly even though she wanted to leave as soon as possible to see if Rhett had returned.

"Well, my dear. Charleston is still the same and you know I am still dear friends with your husband's mother. What a sweet lady she is, she almost reminds me of your dear mother. We all helped each other out to make ends meet during and after the war, especially the hard times... When did you arrive?"

"Yesterday evening."

"And you didn't warn me? Darling, you know I would have rushed right over to see you. I'm sure Eleanor was so happy and charmed to see you. And of course Mr. Butler... Scarlett, I just wanted to ask if I had apologized for saying all those mean things about Mr. Butler? He is such a handsome man and generous... and he loved that little girl so much."

The mention of Bonnie threw Scarlett off guard. She was so preocuppied with thoughts of Rhett. "Um, yes I believe you did Auntie."

"Here I am rambling," she added with a laugh. "I'll come over with you, I do need to make a call on Eleanor and maybe we can go and show you the sites of Charleston."

That didn't sound enjoyable to Scarlett but she rose to her feet. Rhett had showed her enough of Charleston as far as she was concerned and if she had it her way, Rhett, the children and her would be headed to Atlanta by Christmas.

"Maybe I'll enjoy the carriage ride," Scarlett mused aloud.

"A carriage? Why, didn't Mr. Butler tell you the only people that own carriages in Charleston are the Yankees and Carpetbaggers?"

"What on earth do you mean Aunt 'Lalie? Rhett owns a carriage." Scarlett stared at her as if she had gone crazy. Eulalie shook her head.

"Of course your husband owns one and people hold it against him. It's hard to explain but people go around, flaunting their money, snubbing their noses at the less fortunate. Though we aren't rich, we can hold onto our dignity and our pride."

What dignity was there in being poor? Scarlett had once been poor and there had been no dignity or pride. She remembered the humiliation at throwing herself at Rhett for three hundred dollars. How strange Charlestonians were and she was glad that Rhett and her weren't so foolish. Rhett wasn't a fool, though she had thought he was once. No, Rhett had to be the wisest most wonderful man she had ever known. One she admired just as she had admired Gerald.

"It's a luxury that many of us don't have," Eulalie continued to her confused niece. "Not because we can't afford it which many of us can't, but because when one is poor so is the other. We stick together. During the war Eleanor, bless her soul, would give me money to get by."

Scarlett remembered that Rhett had told her so and she had been the one giving all of her relatives in Charleston money. Sending what little spare change she could. Her eyes had gleamed at telling him that she was giving charity to his mother and sister. She nearly smiled at her foolishness but was drawn back by Eulalie who had said Rhett's name.

"He offered to buy Rosemary, Eleanor and even me a carriage but we had to refuse. Your husband is too generous..."

TBC


	12. Rhett's Leave

Note: Thank you all! I was so hapy to have six reviews, you all are too kind. Sorry for any spelling typos but I double checked this time...

Thanks EugeniaVictoria, Tuduvant, LEYTONLOVER333, Joyce LaKee, Frenchtosser and Princess Alica... One of you said you'd like to see more of Rhett's thoughts and you will in the future, I promise but it is mainly from Scarlett's pov. I will post more later this week. I hope you all enjoy :)

Part 12

Scarlett took Charleston by a storm. As soon as the old families heard of the famous Mrs. Rhett Butler's arrival, they came in packs to call upon Eleanor and to see her lovely daughter-in-law. She wondered more what Rosemary Butler was like-for she was such a silent creature. She had never liked women much except for mother and Melanie, for the rest were usually jealous of her and posed a threat. Men were less complicated. But Rosemary was so frank, a trait she had always admired.

Rhett avoided as much contact with her as possible. She always awoke with the light streaming through the shutters to an empty room, only to find him gone. Of course he was an early riser, but his blankets were folded so neatly, she thought she almost dreamt they shared the room. Just so, her third morning in Charleston, he was gone. At least he had left her a simple note she found on the bureau.

Scarlett,

I had some business to take care of. I am sending a telegram to Tara for the children to come to Charleston within a few days. I'll see you for supper.

RB

Well it wasn't sentimental, she thought with some disappointment. His scrawling, bold letters and abrupt manner made her frown. Just the same however, a smile came to her face and she hugged the letter to her heart, laughing at her sentimentality and foolishness as she twirled around. It was far from a love letter but it was from him just the same. She would always cherish it. She placed it in her top dware and caught a glimpse of her smile.

She was happy, despite Rhett's aloofness. She was giddy with the attention she was lavished with. Only barely two days in Charleston, everyone remarked of her beauty. "What beautiful eyes you have, my dear," they would praise her and, "What a fortunate man Mr. Butler is to have such a beautiful wife." 

Needless to say the compliments that she heard began to puff up her vanity and made her all the more charming. It was nice to be admired once again instead of shunned as she was in Atlanta.

A knock at the door made her smile. She briefly wondered if it was Rhett, maybe he had come back early. She opened the door and saw Eleanor, whose face was pale and her brow creased with worry.

"Scarlett, Mrs. Brown is here! You must look presentable."

"What is she the queen or something?" she asked, seeing Eleanor's face with the look of scared rabbit. Poor Eleanor looked so anxious with her lips puckered and her eyes wild that she laughed.

"Mrs. Brown is one of the oldest and most respected women in Charleston. She swore she would never step foot in the Butler's home because of Rhett's reputation but she came here to call upon you."

"Me? Fiddle-dee-dee! Why should she want to see me but very well." Scarlett looked in the mirror hanging by the door. She looked presentable enough to face an old matron, it's not as if she was seeing Rhett or the pope. 

Following Eleanor, she walked slowly down the stairs and caught her first glimpse of the famous Mrs. Brown. She held a cane but she was tall and imposing with a brown fur jacket and her silver hair caught up in a net with a dazzling broach of diamonds at her throat. She looked to be in her late sixties and early seventies. She was speaking to Lucille in a loud voice and turned upon seeing Scarlett.

Scarlett walked forward to meet her and she saw Mrs. Brown coldly appraise her. What a tyrant, she is, she silently thought. Eleanor looked beside herself, and made a hasty retreat to the parlor. She could tell most people ran from her and didn't dare anger this woman. She was what the old families of Charleston stood for.

"Good evening, Mrs. Brown. I am pleased to make your acquaintance."

A silver brow arched. "Well, now I see what all the talk is about. You indeed are attractive, yet comely. But your face is too pale and you are too thin to be considered beautiful. Tell me, Mrs. Butler are you as flighty as I heard?"

Outraged words flew to her lips. She had never been called comely and the words Mrs. Brown uttered were insulting and a blow to her vanity. She coolly appraised the woman back and her jaw clenched as a mirror image of Gerald O'Hara.

"And are you as old as they tell me?" she asked coolly, her eyes blazing. She smiled triumphantly when she saw Mrs. Brown's chin wobble in outrage before a cackling sound emerged from her compressed lips and she began to laugh. Scarlett was mortified. One would think the awful woman would have left with a slam of the door. But no, she hung on her cane and tears were streaming down her pale face with laughter."God's nightgown! I don't see what's so amusing, Mrs. Brown. First you insult me-"

"I assure you it was with the best regards, Scarlett Butler," the woman cut her off with a wave of a gloved hand that had the biggest diamond ring she had ever seen, even more vulgar then her ring from Rhett. "I heard many things about you and I had to see for myself what kind of woman would marry that blacksheep Butler. No, no don't interrupt me girl or defend him. But I find myself to like you even with your sharp tongue and impertinent manner. I do not like simpering fools. Now humor me and tell me just how you caught Rhett Butler and turned him respectable."

Scarlett didn't know whether to still be insulted or to send Mrs. Brown out. She turned Rhett respectable? Fiddle-dee-dee! But why not take the praise for it? The old ladies eyes were twinkling and she seemed harmless enough. She slowly smiled and decided she could use a woman like Mrs. Brown on her side, tyrant or not. And by the end of the evening after pot fulls of tea, she had fished out of Mrs. Brown an invitation for the Butlers to dine at her mansion in a few evenings . Eleanor was shocked.

"My dear, however did you do it?" she asked after Mrs. Brown had left in her fancy carriage. She was the only one that wasn't a Yankee or Rhett that owned a carriage. Because of her influence it was over looked by the people.

Scarlett shrugged, leaning against the door jamb of the parlor with crossed arms and a slight smile. "I didn't let her intimidate me and I was as sweet as pie."

"I bet you Rhett will be surprised, my dear. Never had he dreamed that he would be invited back into the social circle of the Brown's..."

XXXXXX

Later that evening Rhett announced that he was going to spend the night at Dunmore Landing while Scarlett sat brushing her hair. 

She gazed at him from the mirror of the vanity that Eleanor had moved into the room just earlier that afternoon, since Rhett's room was overwhelmingly masculine, with not a hint of frills or femininity. All was brass, hard wood and dark hues. She was surprised at his sudden announcement for she knew Dunmore Landing was his childhood home and had been badly destroyed during the war. She knew also he was purposely trying to avoid sharing the same room with her.

"When will you return?"

"Tomorrow morning since the children will arrive on Monday. Mama will want to get things ready for their arrival. She mentioned that you might want to go to Dunmore with me-"

"Oh Rhett! That would be just heavenly." She smiled at him through the mirror. Now Rhett was changing his tune. Her mind quickly thought of how they would finally be alone! She continued her quick strokes through her hair. "I'll have to pack-"

"But I told her Dunmore will bore you," he cut in, crashing her sudden hopes. Through slanted eyes she watched him.

"But it wouldn't-" Then realization dawned on her. "You just don't want me with you," she shot back, flying to her feet. "Seeing you is like seeing the pope!" All frustration at his aloof behavior rose had rose up within her. She shot him a scowl and placed her hands on her hips. "Ever since I arrived you act as if I had a plague. Why you treat strangers better then you treat me."

He sighed. "Scarlett, I didn't promise you I would spend every waking moment with you. I told you I would be a dutiful husband in the eyes of Charleston. I know you well, you forget, and you will be bored."

"No, I won't," she argued. "I would love to go to Dunmore. Oh, can't I please go?"

He raked a hand through his hair. "God, Scarlett. Don't you understand, I don't want you with me? I'm trying to be kind but surely you understand it would be only a burden for the both of us. You do understand don't you?" 

She understood all too well. She felt hurt, he was plainly telling her she was a burden and he didn't enjoy her company. She turned away as she felt sudden tears spring to her eyes. "I understand," she said, keeping her voice calm. She wouldn't let him see her cry, she wouldn't cry.

"Go to Dunmore alone then. It will be no hardship on me. Besides I wouldn't want to be with someone who doesn't want me." Walking to the freshly made bed, she slipped between the cool blankets and turned over. "Goodnight."

"Scarlett-" he began but decided better of it, and shrugged. "I'll see you in the morning." His voice sounded as if he were speaking to a stranger as he estiguished the gas light, leaving her with no light save the moonlight that streamed through the window. She watched him open the door, the dim light from the hall illuminated his figure for a moment before he shut the door behind him. She heard his retreating footsteps and swiped away her tears angrily.

She rose to her feet and went to the window. It brought back memories of the days at Aunt Pitty's when she was a widow. Only this time she wasn't a widow, all though she might as well be. Resting her chin on her hand, she squinted out into the darkness, she saw Rhett's figure clothed in darkness as he moved as steady as a panther to his carriage. The proud slope of his shoulders and light step made her angry, at the same time utterly miserable. Oh, how she loved him and wanted to hate him! She fell back on the bed and threw a pillow angrily, it would be another sleepless night.

TBC


	13. To Mass

Note: Well I debated on posting this next part. It's nothing major but I wanted a few chapters more before Wade and Ella come to Charleston and things pick up. I don't want to bore anyone or drag out the story too much:) I loved all your reviews and added a short scene from Rhett's pov. I know it's not much but I promise there will be more scenes from Rhett's pov later so bear with me:)

Thank you 

EugeniaVictoria: It's funny that you point out Charleston is boring. I never thought of it quiet like that but it is true. I mean that it must be one of the reasons Scarlett detested it so much... Which is why she'll miss Atlanta later. Thank you so much for faithfully reviewing!

missysammy: Thank you! The conversation isn't mentioned to Rhett only that it happened and they are invited to supper. I'll leave it to your imagination. :)

LEYTONLOVER333: Thank you so much! I have listened to your plea and added a small part from Rhett's pov. There will be tons more scenes with Scarlett and Rhett.

Raicheal: Thank you so much! I'm glad you think I am getting better. How is your story coming a long? I need to go on the IM soon... I've just been busy. But hopefully I'll ttyl.

Here is the next part...

Part 13

Rhett took refuge in the confines of his carriage. The wind was cool and the moon obscured by clouds as he looked out of the carriage window into the darkness of the night. He took a few breaths and tapped the top of the carriage, signifying for the driver to move. He gave one last glance out towards his room where he had just left Scarlett. Somehow he could sense she was watching him from the window with narrowed eyes.

He had seen the hurt and anger in her eyes. He was a fool, yet couldn't deny that she was turning his inner emotions upside down with her mere presence. Despite what he had said-he still desired her. And seeing her lying on his bed at night awash with moonlight, was enough for him. He would observe her speculatively while his eyes would caress her entire body. His love for her may have died but his desire had not. That was the crux of his problem.

Never had he been one to openly receive affection from another soul except from Bonnie. And though he should have been flattered by Scarlett's supposed feelings for him, it left him feeling tired and suffocated. It was true he enjoyed being with her, though he would never tell her that. And it was also true he had quite drinking so much the moment she came to Charleston. It was ironic that she had been the one to drive him to drink so many times before, now she halted his destructive pattern.

She had been good for him in many ways, especially for giving him Bonnie. He pushed thoughts of his daughter from his mind easily. It had become a habit with him to drown out his thoughts. But he could never forget Scarlett had also been destructive. Thus he would take refuge at his childhood home for the night. For he realized the tight control he had prided over his emotions was slowly slipping.

xxxxxxx

The next morning, Scarlett dressed hastily with Lucille's help and stumbled into the library at ten o'clock. Just why she was going to the library, she didn't know for she disliked books. She hoped to have some peace and quiet but found Rosemary sitting on the settee, her legs tucked under her and she was reading a book. It looked rather dusty and boring. Scarlett took a seat and yawned. She gratefully poured herself a cup of coffee from the tray and took a sip.

"What are you reading?" she wasn't interested but tried to sound so.

"Wuthering Heights," Rosemary murmured. Scarlett thought Rosemary looked oddly over dressed to be reading a book but decided not to comment on it. She would have to later ask Rhett what Wuthering Heights was, she didn't want to seem too ignorant to Rosemary.

"I wish Rhett was home," Scarlett murmured, staring outside the window. The sun peeked through the clouds and the day looked promising. She drummed her fingers on the bureau and sighed. She realized she was sighing a lot but she was becoming mad with the perpetual silence. What she wanted was life, and Charleston didn't offer that. And she missed Rhett, for when he was around, she was never bored. He always made her laugh and kept her occupied.

It was awful how much she missed him with only a night of absence. She had missed his presence in their room, even if they didn't share a bed. Just knowing he was with her, soothed her. She had missed watching him sleep and hearing his steady breathing. She had even missed the smell of his usual cigar before he went to sleep. Damn him anyway!

"You really miss him after one night?" Rosemary asked skeptically, placing her book down on her lap and away from her face.

"Of course. It feels like ages." She laughed a little self consciously, never one to admit her feelings. "I suppose I'm becoming rather sentimental."

"I think it's wonderful how much you love Rhett," Rosemary admitted, her eyes dancing. "He hasn't been the same since... well with all that happened. I feared for him but I think you coming to Charleston was wonderful. Now I can finally get to know you and Rhett will be happy again."

She was about to reply but heard the front door open in the hall and strained her ears. She heard footsteps and then she heard Rhett's voice. "He's home!" She jumped to her feet and started for the door, but Rosemary stood up and restrained her laughingly.

"Don't let that conceited brother of mine know how much you missed him."

But Scarlett didn't care. She ran to the door with a smile and rushed out in the hall. But because of her lack of sleep and her hazy mind, she rushed right into Rhett who was making his way down the hall. They collided and Scarlett came hard against his chest and let out a surprised cry as his arms caught her shoulders to steady her. He looked down at her.

"Rhett, I'm so glad you're back!" she uncharacteristically exclaimed, a smile on her lips.

He seemed surprised. "I was only gone a night," he reminded her as he released her.

"I know, but it seemed like ages." She instinctively grabbed his hand and pulled him a long with her towards the library with a smile. "Rosemary is in their reading. I swear she loves books almost as much as I detest them."

That won a chuckle from him and Scarlett felt her heart soar, her earlier anger forgotten. He was back and she was glad, despite her heated words last night. They made their way into the library and she hesitantly released his hand as Rhett went over to Rosemary and gave her a light peck on the cheek.

"Scarlett is sure glad you are home, Rhett. She rushed right out there as if you had been gone for years."

Scarlett blushed in spite of herself and shot Rosemary a glare. Of course Rhett knew that she had missed him but Rosemary didn't have to tell him. She felt rather self conscious as her eyes went to his to gauge his reaction.

His eyes met hers. "Did she?" he asked a little to impersonally. Scarlett looked away calmly and berated how he made her feel. He mustn't know she had lost sleep over him.

"I used to think Rhett was a mind reader," Scarlett added, changing the subject. "He always knew what I was thinking before I said anything."

Rosemary laughed uproariously. "I did too. I once thought he was a gypsy."

The women shared a laugh and Rhett even had a grin on his face. Scarlett was grateful for the change of subject and was glad that he was back and the mood between them seemed lighter. She turned her head as the door opened and Eleanor entered, dressed in a simple gray gown that looked very elegant and a cameo broach at her neck. A fashionable hat was perched atop her piled hair and she felt her mood brighten even more.

"Hello darling," Eleanor said, noticing Rhett. She went over to him and he gave her an affectionate hug. "How was Dunmore?"

"As unchangeable as the wind. In other words mama, it is still standing."

"I'm glad... I wish I could see it. It was your father's pride and joy." there was a wistfullness in her voice. Scarlett could feel the mood changing instantly as Rosemary bit her lip and Rhett's eyes hardened. She quickly decided to change the subject.

"Eleanor are you going out?" 

"Of course dear, aren't you coming? I thought you'd be ready by now."

Her eyes lit up."Where ever are we going?" She was frantically searching for her black hat that she had carelessly thrown on the settee. Anywhere was better then just sitting in the library. Maybe they would go shopping on King Street...

"To mass, my dear."

"Oh," Scarlett murmured with some surprise and disappointment. She hoped her reaction wasn't to obvious.

Why, the only times she had prayed was with her mother. Religion only went skin deep with her. She had never been a saint or as deeply religious as Ellen, who she had once thought was the Virgin Mary. Church? Great balls of fire! She looked over at Rhett, whose mouth was twitching in amusement and his eyes had a knowing look in them. She composed her face and forced a smile, hoping Eleanor hadn't noticed her disappointment. "I-I heard the churches were beautiful here."

"Indeed they are. Now hurry we want to get the best seats."

"I'm sure you will enjoy it, Scarlett," Rhett said, leaning back on the settee. "You'll see why Charleston is dubbed the Holy City."

"Fiddle-dee-dee! You know there's nothing holy about Charleston," She whispered, mindful of Rosemary and Eleanor who were walking towards the door.

She heard his laughter as she followed Rosemary and Eleanor with a sense of dread. She would rather be left alone wiht Rhett than sit in some stuffy church. Her last glance over her shoulder was of Rhett smiling as she was propelled towards the door. She nearly dragged her feet but went out bravely.

TBC


	14. Love Trial

Note: Wow, I was staggered when I saw how many reviews I had recieved! Thank you all so much! I said I was going to post one more chapter this week and since it is almost Easter, here it is. I won't post another chapter until next Friday probably so I hope you all enjoy.

Thank you Raicheal, guitarhorselover, PrincessAlica, LEYTONLOVER333, Cornorama, Joyce LaKee, EugeniaVictoria and Aroon1190.

I will have Scarlett and Rhett go off alone soon and I will try to add some action to Charleston in some way. This next chapter is an interaction mainly between Scarlett and Rhett so I hope you all enjoy. :)

Part 14

Rhett sat at the supper table with Rosemary and Eleanor. They were chattering about their time at mass and running into Sally and Miss Hampton. Rhett listened with half a ear but his eyes would go to the stairs on their own accord. He wondered where the devil Scarlett was and what game she was playing. Never had he known her to pass supper. Something must be wrong for she was quiet fond of food. He almost smiled at thoughts of Scarlett eating during their honeymoon. She had often ate two meals durring dinner. He had threatened to divorce her if she got as fat as the Cuban ladies to which she glared at him and stuck out her tongue. He saw his mother shoot him a knowing look, to his annoyance.

"After mass Scarlett was very quiet," she told him. "Maybe you should go check on her, Rhett. She didn't look well."

Of course she wouldn't look well. No doubt she had tried to feign sickness to get out of church. He knew how much she detested it. Though, he wasn't a saint either. He categorized himself as Episcopalian but religion only went skin deep with him. Scarlett and him were alike in many ways. The only times he had attended church faithfully was as a boy and with the children in Atlanta.

"Scarlett's a big girl," Rhett said with a shrug. "She doesn't like me coddling her."

But the thought was tempting to go upstairs and see what she was up to. His eyes strayed back to the stairs with a thoughtful look. He would have to abstain for the time being. First he would have a drink in the parlor and then go upstairs. What in the devil was his wife up to anyway? Standing up, he excused himself and went to the parlor, thoughts of Scarlett on his mind, followed by thoughts of the children.

They would arrive tomorrow. He was glad for he had missed them. Though they weren't his blood, he had known them both as babies and he had been much more of a mother to them then Scarlett had been. He thought of little Ella with her ginger curls and her often scatterbrained ideas and Wade with his solemn but shining brown eyes. In many ways the boy was like Melanie. 

Thinking of Miss Melly and Bonnie was something he didn't want to think about. Yet, he often thought about both of them. The only two people he had admired and loved whole heartedly. Miss Melly had been a true lady, the ones with courage and gentleness that you rarely saw. Never had anyone been so sweet and accepting. And Bonnie... she had been his angel. But she was gone... he downed a glass of brandy and sat on the settee, staring at the dying embers in the fireplace. With a sigh he rose to his feet and started for the direction of the stairs.

XXXXX

It was unthinkable for Scarlett to go down to supper. She only wanted to be left alone and hide after the ordeal at mass. It had been bad enough that she had run into that awful Sally Bright with a Miss Anne Hampton that looked like Melanie. But the priest, Father Carey had mentioned Bonnie's name to her and that had thrown her off guard. It was obvious that he hadn't heard of the fate that had befallen her the summer before. Thus she had retreated to her room and she feigned a headache, though one was coming in full force now.

The church bell had tolled constantly, giving Scarlett the sense that God was frowning upon her for her sins. Ellen had tried to instill a Godly fear and reverence in her. And though she wouldn't have stepped foot in church if she could help it, somehow sitting in church had made her remember Ellen's teachings she had strayed so far from. She hadn't wanted to be there, for the processions bored her to death. But she knew that Eleanor would have raised her brows and she would look like a perfect heathen if she hadn't attended. And Rhett would laugh at her lack of morals. And if there was one thing she knew, Rhett must love and admire her..

The sound of footsteps nearing the door and a knock made her visibly jump. It was as if Rhett knew she had been thinking about him. She knew it was him. It was strange how one could become accustomed to the unique sound of someone's steps and the way they knocked on the door.

"Come in," she called, trying to make her voice steady and calm.

He walked in, and again his presence assaulted her. She felt like a scared rabbit, and lowered her gaze. She mustn't look at him for he would be able to read her all too well. But, if she avoided his gaze, he would also know. She looked up to find him watching her.

"Why didn't you come down for supper?" he carelessly asked as he undid his cufflinks and stared at his reflection in the mirror. Scarlett was sitting in a upholstered chair by the window. "Mama and Rosemary were worried."

She noticed he didn't voice any concern for her well being on his part. "I wasn't hungry," she quietly said, staring out the window. Thoughts of the past came back to haunt her. Bonnie, Melanie, Ellen and pa. Thoughts she desperately wanted to forget. Her eyes hesitantly met Rhett's. She wondered if he ever talked about Bonnie. How she wanted to laugh with him about the happy times of watching Bonnie perched on Mr. Butler. And how bubbly Bonnie had been. She didn't know why she had this sudden urge to speak about Bonnie but she did.

"Rhett-" she haltingly began. "Did you go to mass with Bonnie the last time you were in Charleston?"

She wanted to hear the confirmation from his lips. She saw his process of removing his caveat stop. He turned a blank face to her. "I would rather not talk about it," he said and began his administration again in silence.

"Well I want to talk about it," she defiantly said. "Rhett, we never talk about Bonnie. And everyone speaks about her... I miss her so and I too was proud of her-"

"Stop it, Scarlett," he harshly cut in. "Damnit, I don't want to talk about her." 

"Father Carey talked about her after mass," she cut in, ignoring his rising anger. "I want to talk about her. I want to remember the good times, Rhett. Please. I loved her and I know it wasn't your fault. I was such a fool to blame you. I know how you loved her-"

"God I can't take this," he roughly breathed, turning towards her. "I told you, Scarlett I don't want to be in your company and you make me listen to something I told you I don't care to discuss."

"Just because you want to forget Bonnie doesn't mean I will!" she shouted angrily. She rose from the chair and went towards him, hands clenched. Suddenly he was towering over her and had her shoulders in his strong grasp. He shook her. His grasp frightened her but she wouldn't show it. 

"Damn you, Scarlett," he said in a low voice. "I would break your neck if it weren't for my mother. I loved Bonnie more then you have ever loved any one a day in your life. You don't know what love is." He pushed her away from him. And yanked on his jacket.

"Where are you going?"

"Out for a drink," he darkly said, shooting her a scowl with his brooding eyes. "Don't wait up."

"No!" Scarlett ran in front of the door and blocked his intent of leaving the room. "You aren't leaving this room. You are a coward, Rhett Butler! Always running away from your problems and running from me. I know you love me and you're running as you did that morning after Ashley's party." A triumphant smile blazed on her face. "You love me."

"What a naive child you are," he muttered, stepping so close to her they were only an inch apart. She stared up at him with glittering eyes. "You think just because of this show of passion that I love you. No, I don't love you, Scarlett. And by God yes I'm running from you as Ashley Wilkes did, why shouldn't I? Once you sink your claws into someone, they don't stand a chance. But no, not any tears, pouts or your body will make me love you. I only pity you and have an odd feeling of sympathy for your plight." He grabbed her and pushed her aside, gently despite his heated words.

"I don't want your pity," she hissed. "What I want is-"

"I know what you want, but I can't give it to you. Goodnight, Scarlett and sweet dreams." His last words were slightly mocking.

"I'll have sweet dreams when you are miserable for all the pain you are causing me!" 

He seemed immune to her passionate outburst and she knew that he knew what she was trying to do for he didn't reply but shut the door behind him. Scarlett let out a frustrated cry and fell on the bed, throwing a pillow savagely and sighing. Her eyes roved the room and it would have given her great satisfaction to throw something. 

There was a discreet knock on the door and Scarlett dashed away her frustrated tears. "C-come in."

The door opened and Eleanor poked her head in. She quietly walked in and shut the door behind her. "Scarlett, what's the matter?"

"Rhett and I only had a disagreement but everything is fine." Scarlett forced a smile.

Eleanor sat on the bed next to Scarlett. And she felt guilty for lying to Eleanor, but she couldn't tell her the truth! Great balls of fire, Rhett would skin her alive or deny everything.

"Only a disagreement? I believe the whole house heard you two."

She blushed and averted her gaze. "I talked about Bonnie," she blurted out before she could stop herself. To her mortification she began to cry. She cried bitterly for the loss of Bonnie, Melanie and Rhett. She felt herself enclosed in Eleanor's arms. It was almost as if she were a sixteen year old girl again and crying in Ellen's arms.

"Oh, Scarlett," Eleanor soothed. "My dear, Rhett hasn't been the same since Bonnie's death, you know that. I know you two have been through a lot and I feared for your marriage. But I know you do love Rhett don't you?"

Scarlett raised tear filled green eyes to Eleanor. She could only nod as she moved out of Eleanor's arms and wiped away her tears. "I'm sorry. I usually don't cry like this. I don't know what you must think of me!" She hated feeling weak and looking like such a ninny in front of Rhett's mother. Heaven forbid that Rhett would find out.

"I think you are a brave woman that has been through a lot, my dear as Rhett has. The fire was gone from his eyes and I had known he had been drinking himself to death. But now that you're here..."

"Yes, now that I'm here," she murmured, her mind formulating ideas. She could sense enemies from allies, and who was on her side. Eleanor loved Rhett dearly but she knew Eleanor was on her side and would help her win Rhett back. She would just have to bear Charleston until then and see if she didn't! By then she would have the pompous Charlestonians eating out of her hands, even if they were a lot of proud and old families with blood behind them. She had charm and that was all that mattered, especially when one knew how to use it to ones advantage...

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Rhett didn't return until eleven o'clock that night. Somehow he knew Scarlett was awake and was waiting for him. That thought didn't ease the frustration he felt. Though he tried to keep quiet, for all his efforts, the door knob gently rattled as he opened the door. He slipped in quietly and saw her, laying on the bed on her side. He didn't say a word as he slipped off his coat and began to slowly undress.

"You came home early," she commented, her voice the only noise in the room. She sat up and hugged her knees to her chest. He avoided looking at her and his lips turned down somewhat cynically.

"The brandy didn't have it's usual affect," he said. He wondered if she had really been waiting up for him. He remembered many times she hadn't been able to sleep because of her nightmares. He would come in late at night, hearing her cries. After she had kicked him out of their room, her nightmares had only intensified and it had taken every ounce of his will power not to go to her and take her in his arms. To soothe her as he had Bonnie.

"Are you having more nightmares?"

"No... not since I left Atlanta. I can't sleep."

She heard him fumble and he lit a lantern with a match. There was a dim light casting against the walls. She blinked against the light and saw Rhett was wearing his robe. The light showed his face. He looked weary as he poured a glass of brandy and handed it to her.

"If I recall you are in need of your usual night cap."

She gratefully took it. She thought of denying it, but he would know better. She would be lying if she said she hadn't drank. The week after Melly's death she had drank too much, especially at night alone in the house. There was a strain of tension between them, the words left unspoken of their past and of Bonnie, but Scarlett wouldn't bring it up. She didn't want to anger Rhett further and suddenly she felt so tired. He moved away from her and began his usual routine of placing out his coverlets on the floor. She watched him over the rim of her glass as she downed the drink and placed the empty glass on the night stand beside her.

"Rhett, well- that is- you can sleep on the bed if you would like," she said in a rush. She lowered her eyes as she felt his gaze on her.

Her ready acceptance of him in her bed surprised him. It was amazing how quickly she changed her mind. Her voice was impersonal but he knew she was frustrated by his refusal.

"It won't work, Scarlett."

"I-I don't know what you mean."

"You're actually trying to get me into your bed after al these years, amazing. To think that when I don't care, you offer me your body. What irony."

She glared at him. "Why are you being so bull headed?"

His brows rose. "I thought I was being agreeable. And pray tell me why are you being so insistent? Are you, prim and proper Scarlett O'Hara admitting that you want my er-body? Rarely Scarlett, does someone receive both the body and heart. Now I do admit I had your body for a while-"

She had no idea what he was talking about. "Oh shut up!" she snapped. "You know that you have my heart-" She then froze as she realized what she was saying. He saw her mouth clamp shut.

"No," he slowly said. "I have your infatuation for something you can't have. It's bitter gall to swallow isn't it knowing you want someone you can never have?"

He didn't know what possessed him to toy with her. Maybe he liked seeing her angry or seeing some fire in her eyes. He loved it when she was angry and that was preferable than her love sick look. He hid his smile in the darkness as he turned away.

"I'm going to sleep," she peevishly said as she turned over and he estinguished the light.

"Sweet dreams, my pet," he laughingly replied. 

There was only a muffled grunt in response. He watched her a moment more, her back facing him. He wasn't looking forward to the cold floor but he had no alternative. It was either that or give into Scarlett. Tomorrow the children would arrive and he hoped that things would be better and both him and Scarlett would be preoccupied. He needed a diversion from Scarlett for she was proving to be rather tempting in her determination to have him. With a sigh he laid his body on the floor and shifted into a comfortable position. It was a long time before sleep claimed him with Scarlett's steady breathing filling the room. 

TBC


	15. And the children Arrive

Note: Thank you all for the amazing reviews. Guitarhorselover you want longer chapters, which I will try to make:) I thought they were too long haha. And EugeniaVictoria you always make me laugh at your saying that Charleston must be the most boring place in the universe, I wouldn't know... But thanks once again to missysammy, guitarhorselover, LEYTONLOVER333, EugeniaVictoria, Joyce LaKee and tennisplayerx33! Here is the next chapter, it is rather long and is a transitional chapter but I hope it is somewhat enjoyable. Enjoy.

Also please forgive me for spelling Eualie's name different each time, the two l's in her name always confuse me and I was too lazy to check. I tried to correct any other typos...

Part 15

"Any minute my dear. The train is always late," Eleanor was assuring Scarlett as Rhett and her stood at the depot with Aunt Eualie besides them. Eualie had been joyous at the prospect of seeing her great niece and nephew. And no one had been able to dissuade her from coming. While Rosemary had stayed home to make preparations for the children's arrival.

Scarlett didn't know why she was suddenly very nervous but she was. It wasn't as if she had been separated from the children for a month but she was used to life in Atlanta with them. She hoped Rhett would be able to see she was a good mother. She spared him a glance.

"Oh, where are they?" she breathed.

"They'll be here soon enough," Rhett easily said, but his eyes were anxiously scanning the crowd. She knew that he had really missed the children. He had always been wonderful with them. She added that in her head of admirable qualities and he became all the more admirable in her opinion.

"Well," Eleanor said with a chuckle. "I don't believe the train was as late as Rhett was. Why he was born a week late that I feared he'd never be born. Did I tell you when he was a boy-"

"Mama," Rhett cut in. "I don't think Scarlett wants to hear about my childhood. It was rather dull. Now my older years are something to be said."

Eleanor rolled her eyes. "Fiddle sticks. That's something a decent lady should never hear."

Rhett threw back his head and laughed. Eualie looked confused and Scarlett laughed. She remembered all the talk she had heard about Rhett getting kicked out of Westpoint and the girl he wouldn't marry. She smiled at Eleanor.

"I would love to hear about Rhett as a boy. When I was a girl, believe it or not, I could climb trees and ride better then any of the boys in the county."

"I suppose Fayetteville Academy did wonders," quipped Rhett.

She shot him a glare but had the grace to laugh. At least he wasn't ignoring her. She turned her head, hearing a train whistle. That's when she saw Wade and Ella making their way trough the crowd with their luggage, Ella was holding Wade's hand with a frightened look on her face. The children didn't spot them until Rhett called their names.

Wade and Ella froze, but Ella pulled her hand from her brother's and squealed, "Uncle Rhett!" She ran as fast as she could to him. And he opened his arms to embrace Ella who threw her arms around his waist. Wade followed suit and the children were speaking a mile a minute.

Great balls of fire, Scarlett thought, they could have at least greeted me. But Rhett was in a serious conversation with Ella and the girl took no heed of her mother. Rhett of course was ridiculously serious when speaking with the children as if they were adults. Then he proceeded to pick up Ella with one arm and she hung her arms around his neck while he placed an arm around Wade.

"How are you today Ella? You look very pretty in black but I think your color is pink."

Ella giggled as she buried her face in Rhett's shoulder. "We had a lot of fun, Uncle Rhett. Except Aunt Suellen is 'specting and she was very mean."

Rhett countered thoughtfully with a smile. "I bet."

"But soon I'll have a cousin!" Ella said with a huge smile.

He smiled and set Ella down on her feet and turned to Wade. "Are you too old to give me a hug, son? Or do you prefer to shake hands?"

Wade only smiled as he gave Rhett a fierce hug. "I missed you Uncle Rhett. I wanted you to come to Tara with us but mother said you needed time alone in Charleston. But mother said I can go on a grand tour to Europe," he announced proudly.

Rhett's brows raised. "Did she?" He turned his attention back to everyone and took Ella in his arms again. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hid her face as he came to stand in front of Eleanor and Euaulie.

"Mama this is Ella and Ella this is my mother."

Ella peeked at Eleanor and whispered, "Hello."

"How charming," Eleanor said and she turned her attention to Wade. "And you must be Wade. I heard a lot about you from Rhett."

"Hello Mrs. Butler," Wade said, staring at his feet. But he did offer his hand and Scarlett was glad they were being well behaved. He spared her a glance as did Ella.

"Hello mother," Wade greeted in an hesitant voice.

"Hello Wade Hampton," she replied and nearly flinched at how formal she sounded. "Is-is there a hug left for me?" she awkwardly asked. And she opened her arms as Wade walked forward and let himself be embraced by her. He had grown so tall that his cheek rested against hers. She felt awkward as he pulled away but she forced a cheerful smile. Looking up, she saw Rhett watching her with a strange expression.

That was when Eualie spoke excitedly, "Why, Wade I haven't seen you since you were a baby and I have never seen you Ella, darling. Come here and give your auntie a kiss."

Rhett set Ella back down and she ran quickly to Eualie, throwing her arms around her and giving her a quick peck. She ran back to Rhett and hid her face on his arm. The adults shared a laugh.

"Well we best be going," Eleanor announced. And to Eualie, "You must come have supper with us tomorrow evening. Tonight we're dining at Mrs. Brown's."

"Who's Mrs. Brown?" Ella inquired, staring up at Rhett with her hand in his.

"An old crone," he said. Ella's eyes registered confusion and Eleanor shot Rhett a look of warning as if he were a child in need of scolding. He laughed. "She is a very old lady, Ella. I remember her from when I was a boy."

Stopping at the edge of the platform. Eleanor in a light voice of order said, "I'll ride with Eualie and Ella. Scarlett dear you can ride with Wade and Rhett. I'm sure you would wish to spend time with your men."

Eleanor's discernment never ceased to amaze her. The thought of riding with Rhett, even with Wade was wonderful. She greedily took any time she could have with Rhett, even if he side stepped her the whole way. He may be stubborn and unyielding but so was she. Her eyes searched for him and came to rest on him at the edge of the platform.

He was hailing a cab and drivers easily stopped for him. His authority never ceased to amaze her as he handed in Eleanor, Eulalie and Ella into the carriage while Wade and her lingered. He gave the driver orders and then the carriage was off admist the dozens leaving the depot. Then he hailed another one for them. The porter who Scarlett had forgotten about, quickly brought over Wade and Ella's bags and Rhett paid him handsomely.

Once the bags were secure, Wade went in and Scarlett felt her heart accelerate as Rhett offered his hand to her. She spared a glance upward, meeting his eyes. His eyes looked like twin dark coals, burning and consuming her train of thought. His lip tilted down and his brow skidded up.

"I believe you have acquired the habit of day dreaming, my dear."

"Fiddle-dee-dee," she airily said, regaining her composure. She took his hand as indifferently as possible but even the barest contact with his skin was putting her mind in a haze. His hand was large and warm to the touch as it closed over hers and she placed one booted foot forward and sat next to Wade, arranging her skirts. Rhett followed suit and the door was closed behind him.

"I'm glad to be in Charleston, Uncle Rhett," Wade babbled as the carriage began to move away from the depot. Scarlett thought he was never shy with Rhett, but with her he was as timid as a mouse.

"I'm glad to have you here, son. I'll have to show you and Ella the sights tomorrow."

"Mother too?" he hopefully asked.

"If your mother wants to accompany us," he said with raised brows.

Scarlett pulled her mind to the present and shot him a annoyed look. Of course she would grab anytime she could to spend with Rhett, even if it was touring stuffy Charleston again...

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They were all in the parlor and Scarlett was listening to Eleanor talk about Charleston with half an ear, her attention mainly focused on Rhett. She stared at him from beneath lowered lashes, and was accomplished in not making it obvious that she was watching him. She had always done so with Ashley at the county parties.

Eleanor turned her attention to Wade and Ella. Scarlett had forgotten her children were sitting in the same room. They were quiet but Eleanor called them over to her and they left Rhett's side, shyly walking over to Eleanor's sitting form and stood at her knees.

Scarlett was agasth when she saw Eleanor hand them a dollar bill. "I will have Eualie take you to King Street and take you both shopping and you can have ice cream. Would you like that dears?"

They nodded eagerly. But looking over at Scarlett, their faces fell.

Wade was the first to say, "Thank you but we really shouldn't."

Eleanor closed his hand over the bill and said, "Nonsense. You children go have fun with your great-aunt and let this old woman spoil my grandchildren." She winked and Scarlett thought she looked so much like Rhett. Both michevious and conspiring with the children. Ella giggled.

"Eleanor," Scarlett cut in with a frown. "I can't have you spending money on the children. You'll spoil them. And besides they'll spoil their supper."

Eleanor laughed a light, musical laugh. "Stuff and nonsense. They are my grandchildren and I have a right to spoil them."

"Mama's right," Rhett said, leaning against the door jamb and making his authority known. "When I was a child, I ate like a horse. One outing won't turn them into gluttons, Scarlett." His smile was disarming and slightly mocking, no doubt referring to her ability to eat three course without loosening her stays.

"I suppose," she allowed. And looked over at Wade and Ella who awaited anxiously, their eyes roving between Rhett and their mother. "You two be on your best behavior for your Aunt 'Lalie."

"Yes mama," Ella obediently said and turned her attention to Rhett. She ran over to his lounging form at the door. "You will come too won't you, Uncle Rhett?"

He caressed her cheek and stared down at her with a smile. "I'm afraid I can't honey. I have to meet with a man about business. But I promise tomorrow we'll spend the day together."

Eleanor rose to her feet and pulled the bell pull and Lucille punctually came in. Eleanor gave her the order in a light but firm voice to accompany the children down to Kings Street with Eualie.

Scarlett watched in amusement as Eualie was fairly beaming with pleasure. At least they would be entertained. She watched Wade and Ella as they were ushered away by Eualie with waves and thank you's. Ella was skipping with her hand through Eualie's. She turned her eyes from the door when the children had disappeared and caught Eleanor's gaze, which was alight with mischief and happiness.

The more she observed Eleanor, she saw her and Rhett were very much alike. Both loved children, hers especially and horribly spoiled them. Rhett had once given Wade enough money to buy candy in bounds that he had come home with a stomach ache. She often had thought he humored the children too much as Eleanor seemed to be doing. She would have to be careful that Eleanor didn't humor the children too much or they'd become spoiled.

Looking at the clock she saw it was all ready noon.

"Great balls of fire," she cried, how had it became so late?

"What's the matter, Scarlett?" Eleanor asked.

Her eyes met Rhett's who was still lazily lounging at the door with his leg crossed in a lazy manner.

"I didn't realize it was so late. I must start getting ready for supper tonight at Mrs. Brown's." It took her hours to prepare for any social occasion. She hated being rushed and she was about to call Lucille to help her when she realized she was gone with Eualie and the children.

"Lucille's gone, how on earth will I get ready? They could be back heaven knows when."

"I'll help you," Rhett smoothly cut in and surprised green eyes met his. "Shall we retire to our room, my dear?" He said it impersonally but the thought of Rhett helping her dress caused her heart to pound.

TBC


	16. Dreams and Desire

Note: Once again all you who faithfully read and review my story are amazing! Thank you. Well here is the next chapter. I tried my best to make it belivable and add chemistry between Scarlett and Rhett but it was hard, and any typos I missed... there is probably a few, I'm sorry :)

Thank you PrincessAlica, LEYTONLOVER333, tennisplayerx33, missysammy and Loyce LaKee. To answer some requests/comments... I'm sorry this chapter is so short but the next one will be much longer, I hope there is enough chemistry for you all but this chapter was difficult to write :) and Scarlett will spend more time with the children in the future, there will be an outting with Rhett, Scarlett and the children soon. Anyway I am on spring vacation and hoped to post a lot more this week but I am going to the ocean until Thursday so chapter 17 won't be posted until then. Please enjoy...

Part 16

Rhett nearly chuckled to himself at Scarlett's reaction once they reached the room. She looked flustered and she was wringing her hands. Never could she hide her feelings. Her eyes were downcast and she looked almost demure yet, despite the appearance she gave off, she was far from that. The green eyes that had captivated him for so long were filled with conflicting emotions as her eyes lowered and roved across the expanse of the room.

It was lost on him why he had offered to help her dress. Prissy was certainly around the house somewhere, but he was curious as to see how she would react and something drove him to play with fire. As a result of his blockade years and gambling, he had a habit of taking risks and being drawn to challenges. She still proved to be a challenge.

"Well are you going to help me dress?" she asked lightly, drawing his mind back to the present.

Slowly coming to stand behind her, he was so close that he could feel the heat of her body. It could have been his imagination but he almost heard her breath hitch. He smiled as he looked down at the top of her bent head.

"What are you going to wear?" he asked. His arms crossed over his chest as he stood at a distance from her. Still, her eyes wouldn't meet his until she turned to face him and cleared her throat. A silence filled the room as she shifted on her feet and shot a helpless look toward the closet.

"I-I'm not sure. I hadn't decided yet."

It was just like Scarlett not knowing what she would wear. Prior to his eviction from her sanctuary, he had always chosen her ensemble. Turning on his heel, he went to the closet and rummaged through her gowns. Mostly black gowns met his vision but and she had brought an emerald one and a cream colored velvet with black lace accents and a tapered waist. Those caught his eyes, especially the emerald one. Turning back to face her with the dress in his hands, he brought it to her, his brows raised.

"How about this one?"

She looked horrified. "Oh I couldn't! What would Mrs. Brown think of me?" But she eyed the gown longingly. He smirked, his eyes laughing at her show of outrage. He knew as well as she, that she didn't like black and decided to comment about her reputation.

"You're repuatation is all ready in shambles as it is. You surprise me that you still care about such things as honor, Scarlett. I always told you one could do without a reputation."

Scarlett seemed to weigh his words, which surprised him. She had always been rash with her words and temper. But she actually seemed to think before she spoke now. There was a slight maturity in her actions, he couldn't deny. Maybe she had grown up somewhat but she still had that ridiculous tendency to hold on tightly to what she wanted like a child would. She was still very much a child and very much a woman. He had always been amazed in what a woman she was; a strong, independent, willful woman.

"I suppose you're right," she allowed, surprising him furthur. And her eyes suddenly narrowed with resolve. "But I shan't let that stop me from having all the Charlestonians and their proud familes respect me and the children. I may be seen as trash in Atlanta but here in Charelston I shall have every fat old cat eat out of my hand, and what's more, Rhett, I shall be a lady."

There was resolve and passion in her voice. Against his will he felt himself admire her spirit and determination. Whatever she put her mind to, she could do and would suceed. From her clenched jaw to deterimined eyes, he saw she was set on her way and wouldn't relent.

"You shall charm Charleston, my pet," he admiringly said. "I dearsay by the end of this season you will have them eating out of your hand."

Her face relaxed and she smiled with delight. "Oh, do you think so Rhett?" Her hand went out and touched his arm in unconcious excitment. While his eyes went to where her hand was on his arm and their eyes locked, a flooding of warmth and kindness between them, that had rarely been displayed or shared between them. It was significant but Rhett chose not to think of it and drew his eyes away from her and lightly smiled.

"I do. Turn around." And as she did so, he flippantly added, "I don't think Mrs. Brown would appreciate you going around her mansion like a scarecrow."

His fingers went to the small buttons on the back of her dress. He undid them deftly and with ease that spoke of expirence. But it was proving to be a time consuming task as he moved to undo her corset on the intent of switching to a lighter one as she wanted to wear. Each lace had to be done in order for the corset to come off and it was a painstaking task.. All twenty nine buttons served to keep the corset confined on her.

Then her small sleeves began to fall off of her shoulders, revealing white skin, he couldn't drag his eyes from her. His movements became slower as if taunting himself and her. Scarlett's bare neck was tilted invitingly, revealing the graceful slope of her shoulders. The insane desire to place his lips on her flesh swept over him but he held himself back. Good Lord, what was the matter with him? He had easily resisted Scarlett's charms before and hadn't touched her for two years after she had kicked him out of her room, but now the mere sight of her bare shoulders was enough to enflame him with desire.

His hand grazed her shoulder and she shivered in response. Her reaction to him only made him pause and his eyes close for the briefest moment to regain is renowned control. Like a sleep walker, he moved slightly closer, the heat of her body beckoning him. She desired him, not Ashley, that is why it was so damned hard to resist her. Before she hadn't desired him as he had desired her. But now she willingly offered herself to him. Before it had been easier to laugh and hide his feeling from her.

Moving his face closer to her hair, she moved her head back slightly and he caught the scent of her hair, the rose water scent he had always likened to her. I am a fool, he darkly thought. He was playing with fire, and before he had been able to, holding himself back with a curb and priding himself for his control. Now, he could feel that control slipping at his desire for her. He wouldn't confuse it with love but he would always desire and want Scarlett.

With the undoing of another button, her corset sagged further from her body, her straight and flawless back now in his vision. His hand brushed her back and her skin was warm and receptive to his touch for she shivered again. The next button was undone, and he continued to struggle. He should just take what she offered and then he would have her out of his system. But the last bit of restraint he had still held him back. If he gave in, she would win and pride and sheer will power wouldn't allow that.

Painstakingly, the last button was undone and the corset fell to a heap at her feet and she stepped out of the material. His eyes bore into her and he had to admit she looked breathtaking completely naked. Her skin was nearly flawless, her waist still tiny and the gentle falre of her hips made him nearly physically restrain himself from placing his hands on her body. Desire shot through him and he cursed himself for putting himself in this situation once again. Stepping closer, he saw a blush that had begun to creep up to her cheeks. And she placed her arms over her chest as if to sheild herself from furthur embarassment.

"Turn around, Scarlett," he softly commanded, his voice gravely.

She turned to face him, her eyes meeting his and she lowered them. He put his hand under her chin and he forced her to look at him. Her eyes were bright and almost uncertain which surprised him, also filled with the same conflicting emotions he felt. In her seemingly innocent expression, she captivated him all the more. Umcounciously she wetted her lips with her tongue and gently bit her bottom lip. She was oblivious to the effect she was having on him. He quickly released her chin but laughed to cover it up.

"I want to see what I've refused," he carelessly said, not wanting her to notice his desire for her. His eyes roved over her body from her breasts to her bare arms and stocking clad legs. "I remember when I could span my fingers around your waist, like so."

His hands went to her waist and sure enough they could nearly span her twenty inch waist. Her eyes went to his hands against her waist, not baring to breath lest he pull away and met his gaze with glowing eyes. He removed his hands.

"Mammy once told me you had the smallest waist in three counties," he added. He was dragging out the conversation, he knew but he had to get his mind off of her.

"What?" she asked. She didn't understand why he was talking about her waist. She only knew she wanted his lips over hers and to be in his strong arms. She stood bereft before him, clad in her chemise

"Never mind." He quickly grabbed her other corset and she stepped into it. Pulling the stays tightly, almost too tightly he knew for she gasped. He knew he was being quick and careless but the sooner she was dressed, he could take his leave before he did something foolish. The movements he did were quick and jerky.

Placing the gown over her head, he quickly fasted the buttons, faster then he had ever dressed a woman, usually he had lingered in dressing Scarlett. And when she turned to face him, he couldn't keep his eyes off of her. It had been a long time since he had seen color on her compared to the black she now perpetually wore. The green gown she wore, he likened to the first moment he saw her at Twelve Oaks. Spirited, young and carefree. Now she looked thinner now, beautiful yes but far from the happy child she had been. There was a hardness about her jaw now and her eyes didn't dance with the same light but with a vulnerability she had never allowed him see.

He moved away from her and her searching gaze. He wouldn't think about Twelve Oaks. It was water under the bridge and better left far out of his mind. Never would he be be a fool like the wooden headed Ashley Wilkes and dream of something that was a long forgotten dream. As far as he was concerned, those memories were better dead and Scarlett and him were over with. The girl she had been had died in the war, though he had wanted to love and nuture that girl spirit within Scarlett as he had Bonnie. He wouldn't become enamored by Scarlett's deceptive charms again.

A sudden change came over her face as he met her gaze. She had realized that he wasn't going to react to her and she was trying to control her emotions with a clenched jaw and frown lines on her forehead. Rhett forced a short laugh. He wanted to toy with her longer but he saw any desire she had felt for him was being replaced with an icy resolve, all traces of vulnerability gone from her face. Then to his surprise, she was eyeing him with an expression he knew so well. The one where she was planning something devious, and her expression changed just as quickly to a full fledged grin. Her dimples were prominent and he eyed her interestedly, wandering what she was devising now.

"You're smiling like a cat that just found cream," he observed, leaning against the wall and watching her with alert eyes.

"I have, Rhett, I have," she said, her eyes dancing as she went to the vanity and sat down, beginning to brush her hair. Watching her quick strokes a moment longer, he remembered a time he had brushed her hai and disposed of her ridiculous hair piece and curls. He saw she was still smiling and wondered why she had the certain change in her demeanor. A smile still slanted her lips and her eyes gleamed as if she knew someting he didn't. Shaking his head, he went in search of his clothes to prepare for supper.

TBC


	17. Old Habits die Hard

Note: I am so happy to return from the ocean and find 7 more reviews than when I left! Thank you all so much. I was thinking that I didn't have enough chemistry in the last chapter but most of you assured me that I did. You all are wonderful and don't worry... Rhett will soon give in.

Thank you PrincessAlica, tennisplayerx33(your review made me laugh so hard), LEYTONLOVER333, xXxlilnoel09Xxx, EugeniaVictoria (why Scarlett smiled will be answered later :), missysammy, djeanne, GGLover91, Joyce LaKee and FancySara.

To answer some questions/coments: The reason why Scarlett smiled will be answered later, this story isn't ending anytime soon and Rhett will give in very soon in fact within the next few chapters and I hope you all like this chapter because... it is from Rhett POV as many requested... though I don't write him that well, I hope you all enjoy. So I will apologize ahead of time for any typos and the fact that I didn't post earlier but I just walked in from vacation... so here it is.

Part 17

Rhett would have laughed if anyone would have told him he would be dining at Mrs. Brown's mansion. The fact that the old crone had sworn she would never let him in her house and that she had always disliked him, even as a boy.

Her home had been renovated by John Devereaux, one of the greater architects of Charleston. Of course it wasn't as modern as the monastery in Atlanta, but it was impecibly taken care of. The dining-room seemed more like a ball room. The ceiling was high and arched with a chandelier, dozens of windows with velvet potiers and the walls lined with dozens of pictures of the Browns ranging from the Revolutionary War to the long dead Albert Brown. His last years had been filled with the affects of consumption.

Rhett remembered this house well as a boy. He would run along the street with the neighborhood boys. They would laugh at how Mrs. Brown had run her husband with an iron fist and would bet how much money she had. The building of the house had continued until it was larger and more ornate then the governors... more outlandish then any house on the Battery. It would seem that his wife and Mrs. Brown were similar in many ways.

All though the house was outlandish, it had style and color. It didn't look like a grave like that godforsaken house in Atlanta, that he had always felt like a stranger in. And strangely he felt like a boy under the old woman's watchful gaze but he only smiled, which seemed to make her raise her brows and give him that look as if saying she knew that he was up to something.

He stared across the table at Scarlett, unnoticed. Evening had set in and the sky was darkening outside because of the shortening days. He had to admit that even though he didn't love her anymore, she looked as breathtaking as ever. Her gown matched her eyes to perfection and though she had lost too much weight in his opinion, her thin face only accentuated her cheekbones and her pale face made her eyes appear larger.

He knew he was a fool for letting her stay in Charleston. She was poison to his blood but something possessed him to consent to her ridiculous plan. Maybe it was his need to know she was well, or for the thrill of outwitting her. She claimed to love him and he knew she was bent on pursuing him with her tempestuous affections. But this time he would beat her and prove once in for all that he didn't love her. And his other reason for letting her stay was to appease his mother. It would break her heart if she knew the truth about his marriage to Scarlett was only a hoax, not to mention anger her.

Yet, he still desired his wife. He would have to be dead not to. Her eyes were even more enchanting with a haunting quality to them. Sometimes he would notice a sadness in the green orbs that was quickly replaced with a narrowed look. He would see her occasionally search for him in a crowd and when she found him, she would seem to relax. It had always been what he had wanted, her searching for him, but what a pity when he didn't want her affections any more that she should want him now.

Time hadn't altered the fact that he couldn't believe she loved him as vehemently as she declared. He knew her well and she only wanted those things she couldn't have. He spared a glance at her, his glass to his lips and saw her picking at her food. There was a glow about her from the gas light's dim light.

"Butler," Mrs. Brown said and the whole table seemed to hush. "Just how did you meet your wife? Everyone is curious to know the romantic tale. I think it's hog wash but do entertain an old lady." Her voice was gravely but there was a twist on her lips as she watched him with dark eyes.

Rhett's mind traveled back to those days. He remembered exactly what she had worn that day, indeed the memory of her seemed to be branded in his mind. His eyes met Scarlett's and he slowly smiled and saw her squirm slightly in her seat, turning his attention back to Mrs. Brown.

"I met her the day the war started. I was invited to an barbecue in the county where she lived. Of course it was fate that I should see her, the belle of the county. She captivated every man's attention and I knew I had to meet her. Alas I met her when she was mad and throwing things." His lips twitched.

"Pardon?" Mrs. Brown said. "Is that some sort of street talk?"

Rhett silently laughed as he saw the anger in Scarlett's eyes. She didn't look happy that he had brought up the incident in the library. Her face seemed animated and her eyes told him she didn't appreciate his little joke. Ever since the escapade earlier in their room, she was oddly quiet and stiff in his presence. Of course he didn't want to think about the tantalizing view of Scarlett naked as she had been earlier, so he pushed those thoughts from his mind and turned his attention back to Mrs. Brown.

"No," he answered. "What I mean is that she had a delightful temper and many more fine attributes that charmed me."

"All of Charleston believes so," boasted Eleanor with motherly pride. "You are a jewel my dear."

His eyes traveled to Scarlett and he saw her anger briefly fade and he could have sworn that he saw her eyes mist, yet that could be a trick of the lighting. He didn't know why but he wanted to bring the fire out in her, couldn't bear seeing her so humble and as long as he kept her temper out and at arms length, he would survive these next few months unscathed.

"Thank you, Eleanor" Scarlett warmly replied, delicately dabbing at her mouth with her napkin. She looked over at Wade and Ella who were very quiet and watching the adults with a sense of fascination and childish confusion. Eyes narrowing however, for Wade and Ella had hardly touched their food and Scarlett looked at him, giving him a 'I told you so' look he knew so well.

"Mrs. Brown this dinner is wonderful," Rosemary said politely, in a cultured voice that made Rhett feel brotherly pride. Rosemary had come a long way from the tomboy that had run rampant through the neighborhood. She wasn't a belle as Scarlett had been but Rosemary was a lady and a fine one at that from a line as tainted as the Butler's.

The old woman nodded graciously and looked over at the children and her silver brows arched.

"And why are you not eating young man and young lady?"

Ella looked ready to bolt under the table and Wade blushed.

"I- we're full," he stuttered and Rhett felt sorry for the position Wade was in. And had the intention of intervening when Ella beat him to it.

"We had lots and lots of candy!"

Rhett cringed and he saw Scarlett angrily flush.

"Ella Lorena!" she cried. "You don't tell people what you eat. Tell Mrs. Brown you're sorry."

"I'm sorry ma'am," she mumbled. Ella looked ready to cry and Wade was staring dejectedly at his plate. Rhett felt awful for the boy and Ella, knowing very well what it felt like to be reprimanded for every action. His father had seen to that.

"It is my fault Mrs. Brown," he cut in. "I talked Scarlett into letting me give them sweets before supper." He looked at his wife who was still flushed and very silent. He knew he would have to take her outside before she reprimanded the children more or caused a scene. Rising to his feet and pushing back his chair he said to Mrs. Brown, "I would be most grateful if you would excuse me and allow Scarlett and I to go outside on your terrace. She is looking rather flushed and it is such a clear night."

He strode over to her seated form and offered his hand. She turned her face slightly away from everyone's watchful gaze and shot him a glare but there was little she could do without causing a scene, he knew. She stiffly rose to her feet and took his arm. The talking resumed as they made their way towards the French doors, opening the door and let her exit first out onto the dark terrace. He followed and there was little light since night had fallen completely.

The only source of light was the light from the dining-room flitting out through the doors. He knew she wouldn't keep silent long and he was correct for she turned towards him. He couldn't see her face clearly through the darkness but he saw her eyes, though he couldn't read their expression, he could feel the anger bursting from her.

"I told you I didn't want the children to spoil their supper!" she hissed, "And you didn't listen to me. Now all of us were humiliated in front of Mrs. Brown and she thinks the children are perfect heathens. You humiliated me purposely!"

"I humiliated you?"

"Yes! You know you did. You always said I was an awful mother and now you prove it to the woman who will no doubt say Scarlett Butler can't control her own children! I have been nothing but considerate to you. I haven't put you in a bad light and I haven't told your mother what a cad you really are for leaving me."

"Is that a threat?" he asked, mildly amused by her anger. But he wouldn't put it past Scarlett. When she was angry, she couldn't control her tongue. He advanced closer to her but she didn't budge an inch and stared up at him with a clenched jaw, her face looking very pale in the darkness.

"You know it isn't. But I don't see how you can humiliate me so! When you know that I-" she abruptly stopped.

"When you what?" he asked, interested.

"It's no use. Why should I say how I feel when you'll throw it in my face? First you treat me as if I were a plague and then humiliate me. I'm going inside." She began to move past him but he caught her arm in his hand and turned her to face him.

"I think we should finish our discussion first, Scarlett," he said, leaving her no room to protest.

"There is no point. You don't listen to a thing I say." Her arm was stiff under his touch but he didn't release her.

"I want to talk to you about the children. Scarlett, they don't need to be upbraided anymore in front of Mrs. Brown. I take full responsibility for their actions."

He knew he had said the wrong thing for she wretched herself out of his hand.

"Now you are telling me how to raise my children! I raised Wade six years without your help!"

He looked over towards the door to see if anyone had come to see what the commotion was. "Lower your voice, Scarlett." Her voice was rising considerably and he could hear her quick breathing.

"As I recall you gave up any rights to tell me what to do!" she yelled. "Aren't you the one that said we weren't husband and wife?"

He heard the door open and suddenly grabbed her, pulling her with him into the shadows and against the wall covered with ivy. She struggled against him and he placed his hand over her mouth to keep her from yelling in outrage.

"Rhett dear is everything okay?" Eleanor's voice floated through the darkness.

"Yes mama..."

And to his surprise, Scarlett bit his hand rather hard. Hard enough that made him grunt slightly. He looked down at her, her back pressed against his chest.

"Why you vixen..."

"What Rhett?" Eleanor asked. "What did you say?"

"Nothing mama," he yelled back as Scarlett tried to kick him. She was still slightly struggling against him, her soft body and curves melding into his body that he became more aware of her position against him. When he felt a slight kick on his leg he looked down at her continued attempts.

"We're fine," he managed to say between his attempts at restraining Scarlett from bodily injuring him. "Scarlett is getting fresh air and admiring the night," he continued, "We'll be but a few more minutes."

"Very well but don't be too long," she called back. "The children are tired, the poor dears." He heard her retreating footsteps and the sound of the door shutting behind her a moment later.

Scarlett began to squirm against him and he finally released her. She glared at him before to his amazement he saw her lips twitch and then she laughed. It had been a long time since he had truly seen her laugh, she placed a hand to her mouth as if trying to stop the laughter.

"Oh Rhett! Did I hurt your hand?"

He flexed his fingers with a grin. "I think I'll live."

"You deserved it," she said. She lowered her eyes briefly. "I know you say you don't love me but I want my stay in Charleston to be pleasant. I don't ask very much, Rhett only that you'll be somewhat decent to me in front of people. I know you don't want me here but like it or not you are stuck with me."

He saw her expectant green eyes and her head tilted back to stare at him. Rhett knew he had purposely made her angry and that he had been anything but very pleasant to her since her arrival. Old habits died hard.

"We have two more months together," he allowed. "For our sakes and the children I will be more agreeable. That is if you are, Mrs. Butler."

He saw a loose curl lying against her cheek that had fallen out of her pins during her struggle. He didn't know what possessed him, but he reached his hand out and gently moved the tendril, placing it behind her ear. It was an instinctive gesture he knew, he had always brushed her hair in the early days of their marriage and at night with her lying in his arms, he would run his hand through the raven tresses. The moonlight momentarily put a soft glow about her that he had never seen before. He had an sudden wild urge to take her in his arms and kiss her as he had earlier. He moved towards her, his head lowering towards her.

But he froze as he realized what he was doing. There was hope shimmering in her eyes and with his next words, he knew he cruelly dashed them.

"But that doesn't change what I meant, my pet... I don't love you."

He knew the words were not needed and they were cruel. Scarlett's smile faltered instantly and her eyes narrowed, he saw the hurt his words had caused. He nearly cursed himself but he had to be firm with her and with himself.

"I see," she said, "You're a liar and a coward, Rhett Butler." She spun on her heel and left him standing out on the terrace.

TBC


	18. Lorena

Note: I am back, sorry for not as many frequent updates but school is consuming and I found a guy like Rhett Butler (but a modern one) who has kept my mind busy ... I really am a GWTW fanatic. So here is the nest chapter and I know many of you will be upset at "nothing" happening again but be patient and you will really love the next chapter. Thank you seelesyangel, missysammy, PrincessAlica, ang887, tennisplayerx33, EugeniaVictoria, Raicheal, LEYTONLOVER333, xXxlilnoel09xXx and Joyce LaKee. I love how you all are still interested and how wonderful you all are for the long and faithful reviews.

This chapter has a song in it called Lorena (It's actually pretty good... my friend's dad played it on the guitar for me and sang it.) and I am not sure if it was really sung in the full version so it is rather lenghty and you can all skip it if you want to. So here is part 18 and I hope you enjoy it. :)

Part 18

"Mama I want my doll," Ella whined. "I have never been separated from Lorena for long."

Scarlett looked up from her task of mending Ella's doll's torn dress. Ella was sitting at mother's knees, almost Indian style with her legs crossed and Wade was quietly reading a book and was so engrossed he didn't look up.

"You must be patient Ella," she reprimanded her daughter. Ella however seemed immune to her mother's stern voice for she loudly sighed and that grated on Scarlett's nerves all the more. It wasn't Ella's fault really, but the fact that Rhett had almost kissed her and had pulled away with the most hurtful words... deliberately cool.

She had been so happy prior to that moment, though a little jumpy after he had dressed her in the room. But she had been hopeful and couldn't keep the crazy smile off of her face at the thought of Rhett being out of control in front of her. It was evident he desired her as much as she desired him, and that made her happy. Now she couldn't be happy after last evening.

Never one for domestic work, Scarlett had never been accomplished with sewing or needle work but in vain she was trying to be a better mother. Ever since the episode last evening at Mrs. Brown's where Rhett had acted as if she were an awful mother for reprimanding her children, she had been compelled to try all the more. And prove him wrong.

Which was the reason why she sat on the settee in the parlor, trying to mend a doll that was seemingly beyond repair. Her anger had faded over the children's conduct and Rhett humiliating her. Now she felt an irritation mixed with an ache at the words he had said. He had cruelly dashed her hopes. She was no fool, she knew his actions countered what he claimed and that he loved her. She had seen the way he looked at her and then he had brushed her hair away, she could scarcely breathe. He did love her for a man couldn't be as intimate as that.

Now in the after math of the disastrous supper, in the light of the day and after a sleepless night where she hadn't spoken a word to Rhett and he hadn't come up to the room, she was in a sour mood. The ache still remained and her heart felt like a stone within her chest. That ache, she knew would be there until Rhett admitted he was hopelessly in love with her.

She jammed the needle in the material almost savagely and eyed her work critically. Maybe she should ask Rosemary for help. But pride kept her from doing so.

"Mama are you finished yet? You look angry," Ella observed, tugging at her sleeve and making Scarlett's hand jerk which made her nearly stab her hand with the sharp point.

"Great balls of fire, Ella! Stop bothering me. I'll finish when I finish. Go play outside..."

"But I can't!" she protested with a pout. "Uncle Rhett is gone and so is grandmama and Aunt Rosemary. And Wade won't even come with me because he's reading."

Wade momentarily looked up from his book and gave Ella a look. "Ella listen to mother and quit whining. I'm tryin' to read."

Ella stuck out her tongue at her brother as his eyes went back to his page thus he didn't see her. In spite of herself, Scarlett laughed. It made her think of her at that age sticking her tongue out at Suellen. Ella giggled seeing her mother's good mood returning.

"What's so funny now?" Wade demanded, with confused brown eyes roving in between his sister and mother.

Mother and daughter laughed again. After their laughter subsided, Scarlett set aside Ella's doll with the needle placed in the dress. She looked down at Ella who was still at her feet and fingering the side of the settee with a despondent sigh that seemed to fill the whole room, while thinking of some way to amuse Ella so she could finish the doll. Her eyes scanned the parlor until it came to rest on the piano and her eyes brightened.

"Ella darling why don't you go play mother a song on the piano? And I'll sing."

Ella's hazel eyes brightened. She scrambled to her feet as if she had been offered the greatest gift.

"Really mama? Will you please sing Lorena?"

Scarlett nodded as Ella rushed over to the grand piano and pulled out the piano seat and sat down, her feet barely touching the floor but her toes did as she leaned forward and began to play a light tune. While Scarlett picked up Ella's doll and resumed sewing.

Of course Scarlett had to admit to herself that had never sang very well. Her voice was passable but she detested singing too much. Oh, she had sang during the war... and that made her think of how Rhett and her had once played and sang together at Aunt Pitty's piano. She pushed those lingering thoughts aside and her voice rang out in a light tone as she began to sing, her head still bent over the doll concentration:

"The years creep slowly by, Lorena  
The snow is on the grass again  
The sun's low down the sky, Lorena  
The frost gleams where the flowers have been  
But the heart throbs on as warmly now  
As when the summer days were nigh  
Oh, the sun can never dip so low  
A-down affection's cloudless sky,"

her voice faltered a little but she continued on.

"A hundred months have passed, Lorena  
Since last I held that hand in mine  
And felt the pulse beat fast, Lorena  
Though mine beat faster far than thine  
A hundred months...'twas flowery May  
When up the hilly slope we climbed  
To watch the dying of the day  
And hear the distant church bells chime.

We loved each other then, Lorena  
More than we ever dared to tell  
And what we might have been, Lorena  
Had but our loving prospered well  
But then, 'tis past, the years have gone  
I'll not call up their shadowy forms  
I'll say to them, "Lost years, sleep on  
Sleep on, nor heed life's pelting storms."

The story of the past, Lorena 

Alas! I care not to repeat  
The hopes that could not last, Lorena  
They lived, but only lived to cheat  
I would not cause e'en one regret  
To rankle in your bosom now  
"For if we try we may forget"  
Were words of thine long years ago.

Yes, these were words of thine, Lorena  
They are within my memory yet  
They touched some tender chords, Lorena  
Which thrill and tremble with regret  
'Twas not the woman's heart which spoke  
Thy heart was always true to me  
A duty stern and piercing broke  
The tie which linked my soul with thee.

It matters little now, Lorena..."

Ella missed a key but resumed playing very well, Scarlett was surprised for a girl who had the mind span of a puppy. Pausing a moment, she caught her breath and picked up where she had left off: 

"The past is in the eternal past  
Our hearts will soon lie low, Lorena  
Life's tide is ebbing out so fast  
There is a future, oh, thank God!  
Of life this is so small a part  
'Tis dust to dust beneath the sod  
But there, up there, 'tis heart to heart."

Her voice trailed off on the last note and she was silent a moment. A feeling of melancholy came over her. It was a rather depressing song and made her think about the war, something she had never liked to think about.

"Mother you sing beautifully," Wade praised with a slight blush, in awe of her singing that he had even dragged his eyes from his book.

"Why, Wade Hampton you make me blush," Scarlett teased her son. "You'll break many poor girl's hearts."

He blushed a brighter shade of red and Ella giggled, still sitting at the piano. While none of them noticed the fourth person in the room until they heard a low chuckle and all eyes went to the door. It was Rhett and he was lounging at the door, watching them and advanced further into the room.

"Uncle Rhett!" Ella squealed as if she hadn't seen him in ages. Her black skirt swirled about her knees as she ran over to him and hugged him fiercely. He returned her hold and his eyes went to Scarlett.

She felt her heart flutter.

"Doesn't mother sing like an angel Uncle Rhett?" Ella asked, her hand in his. Rhett's mouth twitched at likening her to an angel. While Wade had placed down his book and still looked a little flushed at his mother's praise.

"Mama says," Ella continued, "That Wade will break girl's hearts."

Scarlett barely heard what Ella said, her eyes were searching Rhett's. She was still upset with him, that is she should be furious. But she couldn't deny she was glad to see him and had missed him terribly when he hadn't come up to the room last night.

"I'm sure Wade will," he was saying, "If he takes after his mother."

She didn't know if it was a compliment or not but she lightly smiled. "How you do run on Rhett."

She made herself continue the task of mending the dress. The children and Rhett talking. They planned to go for an outing later. The trio were all laughs and excitement as they talked about their great many plans. She had missed hearing Rhett talk with the children and she likened it to her girlhood days at Tara. Distinctly, she could remember the sound of Gerald, Suellen, Carreen and Ellen's voices over the dinner table...

She was so preoccupied with her thoughts, she didn't hear the children's departure until Rhett's voice made her jump and she jabbed the needle in her finger and let out a cry.

"What's wrong?" he demanded in a anxious voice, his body moving towards her.

"God's nightgown!" she cried, ignoring his concern in his face that she was bleeding. Blood had always made her feel faint and it hurt awfully. "I pricked myself with that blasted needle."

"Here let me see," he easily said and she was surprised when he kneeled before her and took her hand in his.

She reacted strongly to the closeness of his body near hers. His dark head was bent over her hand where she wanted to run her fingers through his hair. All she needed to do was lean slightly forward and she could almost fall onto his knee.

"I was never good with the needle," she lamented a little breathlessly.

He produced his handkerchief from his pocket and placed it over her wound. His dark eyes met hers and a shock of thrilling awareness coursed between them. The position he was in and the heat of his body made her feel as if she couldn't drag enough air into her lungs and she silently cursed her stays. It was a repeat of the event of last evening, where both couldn't drag their eyes from each others but were powerless to the attraction between them. It had always been there, Scarlett dimly thought, but she had never truly noticed it until now.

As if on accord, her free hand that wasn't in his went to his cheek as if in a dream. She could feel the ruggedness of his cheek and the heat of his skin on her palm. With a deep sight, she leaned slowly forward, placing her other hand over his shoulder to steady herself. "Rhett..."

He didn't move forward but nor did he retreat. Indeed, through hazy eyes she could have sworn that she saw his head slightly incline forward, his eyes darkening. This time she knew he would kiss her! But his move wasn't fast enough and even as she wanted his arms to crush her body to his and for his mouth to ravish hers, Ella barged into the parlor.

"Mama is my doll done yet?"

Swiftly, as if nothing had happened, Rhett pulled back so suddenly she almost landed on the floor but caught herself. She blushed profusely and felt a keen disappointment as Rhett had retreated again. He was far from her once again both physically and mentally, with a smirk on his face.

"Ella what did I tell you about interrupting adults conversations?" she breathlessly said, not bearing to look at Rhett.

"But you weren't talking!" she said, placing her hands on her hips. She looked innocently up at Rhett. "Were you and mother talking?"

"No, honey," he answered the girl and looked at Scarlett. "I'll let you get back to your mending my dear."

His voice was impersonal and she blew out a frustrated breath. She felt like screaming but she sighed. Rhett may think he was winning but he would kiss her again soon, she was certain of it. Determined eyes met his. His brow merely arched and he took Ella's hand in his large one and gave her a smile.

"I heard you wanted to go outside," he said to Ella, his voice cheerful and a smile on his face. "Let's find that brother of yours and have some fun!"

"Bye mama," Ella said as she left the parlor with Rhett. As soon as their voices disappeared down the hall, Scarlett threw down the doll and observed her hand with a grimace. Her hands looked awful. And she thought of the feeling of Rhett's hand on hers, her eyes glittered.

Men were such fools over kisses. Rhett would truly kiss her before the month was over, she would see to it. If it weren't for Ella, she would have had his lips over hers and then he couldn't have resisted her. The need for Rhett to desire and love her was overpowering she could almost taste it. She knew it would happen. Just how it would happen, she had not the faintest idea, but whatever she put her mind to, she succeeded Just as that thought came to her mind she heard the sound of Eleanor and Rosemary's voices in he hall, they had just returned.

TBC


	19. A Butler Outing

Note: I am once again so happy with all the wonderful reviews. Currently I am in the process of moving so I thought I would post another chapter since it might be awhile until I can post another chapter, with all hectic things in my life going on such as moving and school :( But I hope you all are pleased with this chapter. Because of your requests, I added this one. And this isn't the best quality since it was a little rushed... but somehting is better than nothing.

Thank you tennisplayerx33, seeleysangel, PrincessAlica, LEYTONLOVER33, FancySara, EugeniaVictoria, Joyce LaKee, xXxlilnoel09xXx and missysammy. You all are so amazing once again. And to answer some requests or comments: Scarlett and Rhett will have a fight later haha (I mean it is Scarlett and Rhett, so yes she will leave Charleston but I don't want to give too much away), and yes... what woman wouldn't want Rhett? I find myself liking guys like RB (it's a curse) Anyway I hope you all enjoy and I will post again as soon as possible.

Part 19

Watching Scarlett sitting across from him was proving to be amusing. The children were sitting on either side of her. Rhett observed she had left her food untouched but she had made use of her time by drinking champagne, of course she didn't drink too much for the sake of the children. Yet, the chamapnage had seemed to relax her and go down easily. She had always loved to drink and seemed to be taking advantage of the opportunity. Much earlier she had been glaring at him and barely cordial, the vixen and tempest she was, mad and throwing things, telling him and the whole world to go to hell.

He hadn't wanted to take her out, indeed he had avoided her at all costs since the close moment he had come to kissing her in the parlor. But the role of the doting husband had to be played for his mother's sake. Taking Scarlett and the children out to a play and supper as well was a reprieve from all the soirees and calls. It was a wonder that anyone would let him grace their doorstep and had to admit silently to himself Scarlett was the reason why.

For once she was the one who offered him something he desperately craved-to beat the old guard. For years in Atlanta he had done so with his own effort. Every move he had made, Scarlett had sought to ruin his plans with her questionable friends and tarnished reputation. Certainly he had contributed to her fall from grace in the eyes of the people of Atlanta but she had finished it. Now, instead of him aiding her, she in some way was aiding him. It was an ironic twist of roles and no sooner had he thought this, Wade nervously clear his throat.

"Mother you're not eating," the boy said, concern evident in his voice.

Scarlett looked over at Wade and gave him a slight smile. "I am not hungry. How about you finish it for me?"

The boy only hesitated for a moment before took the offered plate and proceeded to scarf it down. Boys ate like horses at the age, he had done so as a boy in which Rhett's mammy said he would be as fat as a cow if he weren't careful. "You'll be so fat dat no lady in her rightful min'would have ya Mistha Rhett unless yous rich," she had admonished.

He smiled at the thought of him as boy. His determination had been evident then and his goals set even as a six year old. "I will be a gentleman and I will be rich, mammy."

Ironic that he was far from a gentleman. To his dying day he would be no gentleman but a black guard and scalawag . However he was married, something he wished he never would have done. Their marriage had been a disaster from the start and he wondered how things would have been different between Scarlett and him if he would have never married her.

One good thing that had come out of his life of carousing and gambling was that he was richer than the president... Realizing his mind had wondered again, he brought it back to the present and saw that the children and Scarlett were ready to go, for Ella had become antsy and was tugging at Scarlett's sleeve insistently.

"You ready to go to the park?" he brightly asked Wade and Ella.

They nodded eagerly, scrambling from their seats as he waved the waiter for the check and put a generous tip on the table. Rising to his feet, he offered Scarlett his arm.

"Shall we, my pet?"

She nodded wordlessly and rose to her feet. The children and them made their way towards the door and opening the door, they stepped out into the streets of Charleston. Today was a particularly sunny day for the middle of October and the streets were crowded with people. Beside him, Scarlett stumbled slightly and in his mind there was no doubt, his wife was tipsy though she hid it well. He thought of how his mother had cornered him into this outing. Scarlett had at first offered a lame excuse but for the sake of his mother, Scarlett had relented.

"It will be wonderful for you all to have family time," Eleanor had told them with a smile. "You both need some time together away from society functions." She had given Scarlett a pat to her cheek as Rhett watched, declaring, "I know the lectures and countless calls bore you, my dear."

In which Scarlett had opened her mouth to deny it but she hadn't said anything but merely offered a weak smile that was far from happy. The tension between them was obvious. Especially since a few days prior when like a fool he had almost kissed her. Fortunately they had been interrupted by Ella for he wouldn't have been able to control himself. What he needed was less time with Scarlett but decided not to point that out to his mother.

First he had taken Scarlett and the children to a play at the new theater. Romeo and Juliet, far from a comedy to lift her all ready irked mood. The actors had played their parts fairly well and though he had never cared much for Shakespeare, the play was a good diversion. Still, he scoffed at the notion of sacrificial love in which one would die for the other. True he had felt that way for Bonnie, but romantic love was a far cry from selflessness. Though he had loved Scarlett passionately, he wasn't that giving. Ella had oohed over Juliet's beauty and of course Wade had been fasinated by the sword fights.

"How did you like the play, Scarlett?" Rhett slyly asked his wife beside him, hoping to lighten her mood.

She gave him an annoyed glance, he was not on her good side today.

"I would have enjoyed it more," she sweetly said with narrowed eyes, "If you hadn't taken me on the intent of boring me to death."

He grinned. That had been the point in taking her. The knowledge that she detested plays and Shakespeare had been enough for him to take her. Although it had been an enjoyable play and the children had loved it, Scarlett had silently refused to admit she had enjoyed it just a little. Though he knew she did.

"Come, Scarlett. I know you enjoyed the play and you might as well admit it."

Letting out a frustrated sigh, she shot him a grudging look. "Very, well. If you must know I never knew a boring old play could turn out to be... so lively."

"Now the truth comes out," he quipped. "Don't worry, I shan't tell a soul you enjoyed Shakespeare."

His voice was full of mishief and she reluctantly smiled. Both noted that the children were walking ahead of them by a few yards, very talkative and arguing over what was the best scene in the play. Hearing their childish argument made him smile with amusement and his eyes met Scarlett's, seeing the slight smile that touched her lips. Both were in a much better mood then before. The words of the kiss they had shared remained unspoken for the time being and for that, Rhett was grateful.

"Suellen and I used to fight like cats and dogs," Scarlett allowed with a proud smile. "Of course I always won."

His brows rose, it wasn't very often she spoke of her girlhood days.

"Of course. Of that I have no doubt, my pet. You must have been a very naughty girl."

"Fiddle-dee-dee, Rhett, I was no monster like Suellen. One time I went for a swim in the creek and she stole my dress! I had to run home and Mammy saw mw with only my undergarments on..."

"I have seen you with your undergarments on," he devilishly whispered and gave her a wolfish grin. Something in him made him want to tease and taunt her, though the intimacy of his words was evident.

In turn, she hit him lightly with her fist on the shoulder and her face flamed as her eyes flew over to the children to see if they had heard. They were nearing the park.

"Do you want the children to hear you?"

Luckily she wasn't in a temper. Quiet the opposite in fact, she was smiling though her cheeks were still becomingly flushed. There was a lightness about her mood that had never been present before the war. Opening his mouth to give her a witty remark, he stopped as Ella ran over to Scarlett and tugged on her arm, looking up at her face expectantly with hopeful eyes.

"Mama will you chase me?" she begged.

Being in no condition to run, Rhett saw Scarlett waver and shoot him a helpless look. She wasn't drunk but there was no doubt the champagne she had consumed did have a slight affect on her, her slight stumbling had testified to that and her light, almost giddy mood.

"Well Ella..." she haltingly began. Longingly looking towards the bench where she hoped to sit down. Yet, Rhett wasn't going to let her off the hook so easily and decided to intervene.

"Of course your mother will play with you. Won't you, my pet?"

The glare she shot him could have melted ice but she returned her attention to Ella.

"Of course I will ,darling," she sweetly said, shooting Rhett an evil glare.

The little girl didn't wait another second. With an excited shout, she began to run. Her hair blew wildly in the slight wind as she ran under a path of overhanging tress. In turn, Scarlett picked up her skirts with a final glare directed at Rhett and began to run, albeit difficultly. Rhett knew the corset no doubt made her short of breath, not to mention the champagne that had addled her mind.

He watched Scarlett's retreating figure and skirts swishing about her ankles, her stumbling steps, moving bustle and dragging train with amusement. Wade stood beside him and hollered, "Catch her mother!"

After a few minutes, Ella made move to come back towards Rhett and Wade. The leaves kicked up at her feet and Scarlett suddenly came from behind a tree and nearly caught Ella had the girl not side stepped her mother. And Scarlett lost her footing, tripping on her train and falling into a heap on the ground on wet grass and leaves.

Ella ran towards Wade and Rhett, giggling rather loudly. Scarlett still remained sitting on the ground with a scowl directed at him and Wade. The boy couldn't keep from laughing nor could Rhett keep the smile off of his face. Neither moved from their spot for a moment as they regained their composure.

"What do you say son?" Rhett asked Wade. "Should we aid your mother?"

"Yes, uncle Rhett."

For a moment he debated, the picture Scarlett made with leaves in her hair and the dark scowl on his face was amusing. But he relented and stepping forward a few yards, he came to stand over her and offered his hand.

"Enjoy the chase?"

"The only enjoyment I would get is for you to fall flat on your face," she returned, grabbing his hand and coming to her feet. Brushing off her skirts she looked up and shot him a glare. "You did that purposely."

"Surely not! Never would I intentionaly do that to you. How you wound me, Mrs. Butler."

A slight and reluctant smile came to her face if one could call it that. Ella ran back to her mother's side followed by Wade, whose face was still red from laughing. Rhett noted the change in their open affection to Scarlett as Ella grabbed her mother's hand and Wade stood very close to her.

"I won, mama," Ella boasted in delight.

"Of course you did, darling," Scarlett praised though rather artificially, "You go run off and play with Wade while Uncle Rhett and I walk a little."

Ella obliged and made Wade chase her. They started off across the park past people strolling. The lanky boy was easily gaining speed on her, Rhett observed. Wade had grown much over the past year. Reluctantly turning his attention back to Scarlett, she was watching him.

"Shall we, Mr. Butler?"

She was asking him if he would walk with her. Avoiding being alone with her, proved to be pointless now, for she had cornered him to walk alone with her. He nodded and she looped her arm through his, both walking at a light pace past a row of cypress trees. The silence was amicable but the further they walked, the more darker it became by the thicker canopies.

The silence remained for a good while between them and Scarlett seemed content. While Rhett's mind went back to the play in comparison to Scarlett. The characters had been portrayed as star crossed lovers. He didn't believe in such things but if there were such a thing, he realized it would have to be Scarlett and him. Yet, the thought of Scarlett killing herself over him was highly amusing. She would have left his lifeless body on the altar and taken his money. He laughed.

She shot him curious look. "Why are you laughing?"

He shook his head.

"Oh, Rhett! You can't leave me in the dark," she pleaded. "If you tell me-I'll tell you a secret."

He watched her animated face. This creature was Scarlett at her most charming time. Carefree and pleading, excited like a child that brought a smile to his face and made him forget all the past things that had transpired between them.

"And what, pray will you tell me, my pet?" he teased.

She rolled her eyes. "Spare me the platitudes, Rhett. I'll tell you what Amelia Pengrove did. Eleanor and I had tea with her and it was simply scandalous when Eleanor left the room she-" Suddenly she paused, her eyes narrowed in mock outrage. "I won't tell you anymore until you tell me why you laughed."

"Very well," he allowed. "I'll tell you when we reach the bridge ahead."

She slightly stumbled as she kept with his step and he forced himself to slow down to make it easier for her. Looking over, she was indeed distracting though he swore she left him cold. Her hair was fashioned up with a comb and she had slight ringlets that framed her face. For once she didn't wear black, but a navy blue gown with a pearl necklace and a black shawl. Despite her simple dress, Rhett found he had difficulty keeping his eyes off of her for there was something that was different about her but it was inscrutable to him. One would think he would be more cautious after the incident in the parlor.

"Why did you laugh?" she demanded again, turning her face towards him, the sunlight catching her comb and face. It reflected the light of her eyes that was alight with interest. Her eyes sparkled like twin emeralds and for a moment he was captivated before shortly laughing and throwing up an arm in mock defeat.

"All right, you insistent girl, I shall tell you. I was laughing at the thought of us as Romeo and Juliet. The thought of you dying because you couldn't "live without" me is highly entertaining."

She was silent for a moment as if thinking about what he had said. She laughed also. "I see why you would find it amusing. For I have never done anything selfless have I but somehow I don't care..." In a sudden move she threw up her arms and shouted, "Scarlett Butler is no saint!"

"Shh, Scarlett," he chided. "You'll alert the up the entire park. Now every Charestonians will be disappointed to know that they esteemed Scarlett Butler is not a saint. How grieved they shall be."

Scarlett's eyes sparkled with laughter. "Oh Rhett! Stop it. I can't stop laughing. Oh, why did you let me drink so much? I hid it well until I fell flat on my face. It's all your fault."

He shrugged, a smile playing at his lips as they continued their walk. "I am no temperance crusader. Not to mention the evil glares you were shooting over your glass at me..."

"Fiddle-dee-dee. You can't blame me for being angry with you. Anyway I am not that drunk. I am perfectly sober thank you very much. I'm so glad we went out today, Rhett, with the children," Scarlett admitted, turning towards him and releasing his arm.

Her face was clear to his gaze despite the shadowed the canopies of the trees were causing. Again, as if fate would have it, she lost her footing and instinctively he stepped forward and caught her around the waist. Her shawl slightly fell from her shoulders, revealing her shoulders.

The emerald eyes were alive with life, yet hazy. Not with the hardness he was accustomed to seeing. A slight smiled tilted her lips as she watched him beneath her lashes. Daring him and beckoning him to move closer and take her offered lips. He knew what she wanted but he remained still, his arms still holding her.

"Well?" she said, a brow arched.

"Well what?" he asked, not able to drag his eyes from hers. He had the insane desire to kiss her out in the park, the thought was off limits to him. Certainly he couldn't fall under her spell and would be a fool to do so again.

"Are you going to kiss me?" Her eyes went to his lips in shocking clarity and he was speechless. While his eyes in turn traveled from her eyes to her lips and bare shoulders.

He really shouldn't. But the temptation was too hard to resist. He hoped she wouldn't be able to grasp the desire he felt for her right now. The wind moved over them as if a current or a force that made him step forward and pull her tighter against him, her body flush against his, her head tilted back to look up at him and her eyes fluttered closed.

Rhett forgot that he had told her he didn't love her and didn't want her in Charleston in the first place. Call it forgetting reason but he had to kiss her and he would, hell he couldn't remember the last time he had kissed her. Framing her face in his hands, his lips met hers and if anyone would have seen them, they would have been shocked to see such a display in public.

The lips beneath his were soft and pliant. She swayed closer to him and her arms wrapped around him as if she would never release him. Taking advantage of her open lips, he prodded her mouth with his tongue. Thinking she would jerk back, he was surprised to find quiet the opposite, indeed she imitated his motions and her hands moved sensually over his back. Never had she been so responsive in his arms. The kiss deepened considerably until Scarlett seemed to not be able to stand on her own and nearly fell but he held her.

In his arms she was trembling. If not from the sudden chill or his embrace, he couldn't be sure. Rhett only knew he was a fool and dimly told himself this even as he continued to kiss her and bent her back over his arm, which made her tighten her arms around his shoulders. Even in Rhett's mind, it seemed like a dream, the ones he used to have of Scarlett before they were married.

However, all dreams ended and the sound of laughter brought him back to reality of his surroundings and he pulled away, placing his hands on her shoulders to place a distance between them and to steady his emotions. Her closed eyes fluttered open and she looked up at him with pleasure and triumph.

"You do love me," she quietly said, her arms still hung loosely around his neck.

He froze and grabbed her arms, placing them back at her sides as he cooly stepped away. It took her a moment before the triumph faded from her eyes, replaced with confusion, mouth opening to speak but then clamping shut. He knew he should say something in defense of his actions but he couldn't come up with an excuse. The fact that he desired her was plain to them both. It was proof enough that he wasn't able to conceal his desire from her.

"We should keep on going," he gruffly said. "The children will be looking for us."

Suddenly, she wretched herself away as if burned or the mere prescence of him repulsed her, stumbling in a move that surpsried him. He took a step to aid her but she threw up her arm, her eyes narrowed to slits. The anger and rage radiated from her unlike any fit of temper he had witnessed in years.

"You're acting as if nothing happened!" she hissed.

"Should I?" he asked with a shrug and sighed. "Come on, Scarlett. It was a simple kiss."

"Oh," she mocked, her eyes angry. "It must be a common occurrence with you. Rhett Butler has kissed a great many women! Well, I can very well make it home on my own with the children. You are a-"

"Cad?" he supplied. watching her flounder in outrage.

"Yes! I'm going home." She started to walk away from him and he made move after her. The little fool, he couldn't help but think, at this rate she would fall flat on her face again. But she was too proud to ask for his help not to mention furious.

"You know," he quipped, "It would be a lot more quicker if you would take my arm. You are in no condition to stomp all the way to the Battery."

"The only satisfaction I will get is slamming the door in your face," she huffed. But he saw by the slight unclenching of her jaw she had relented and grabbed his arm with stiff, biting fingers. Her frame was suddenly ram rod straight and she seemed very sober as compared to earlier.

"Scarlett, surely you're not going to let one kiss rile you so much," he chided. "It was merely a show of affection." But Rhett nearly flinched at how his words sounded, as if he were trying to convince himself. Repeatedly he told her he cared and desired her but didn't love her.

She spun on him, her eyes blazing with passion. "Affection? Oh, was that all? God's nightgown, you really must believe I am daft? I'll have you know, that wasn't simply affection, I know the difference. You love me though you are too much of a coward to admit it. This discussion is over."

After her last words, she yelled the children's names insistently and the children speedily came running towards their mother, their faces anxious at the tone of her voice. Yet, he saw that she forced a smile and her face was utterly transformed as if she hadn't been upset. Though by her stiff frame, he knew it was the contrary. As it was, she completely ignored him, as she took Ella's hand in hers and the Butler family made their way out of the park towards the Battery. Somehow, Rhett knew any pleasantries between him and Scarlett had expired and there would be hell to pay.

TBC


	20. When Rhett decides to leave

Note: Well, I'm back and my moving is done! Yay. Here is the next part of my story and I hope you all enjoy it  Thanks once again to my readers, you all are wonderful as always (I can't say it too many times) Just stick with the story and I think it will get even better and step up a pace in later chapters.

Thank you genasyz, seeleysangel, missysammy, xXxlilnoel09xXx, tennisplayerx33, LEYTONLOVER333, EugeniaVictoria, Raicheal, Joyce LaKee and VampiresRule103.

It made me smile to think I am getting better and to answer the one question, there might be another guy later who fights for Scarlett's affections but not for sure yet. I hope you all enjoy!

Part 20

After the day at the park Scarlett was whisked into Charleston society so fast that her campaign at wining Rhett back was difficult, not to mention the words about the kiss were never spoken between them. She was rarely alone with him and was frustrated that once again there was a distance between them, a mere courtesy. With people calling and all of the homes Rosemary and Eleanor dragged her to, she scarcely saw him save during all the meals and at night. But by that time she was so tired she could barely keep her eyes open.

Ella and Wade were good children she was beginning to see after they were in Charleston for a week. She thought of how well Melanie had taught them and felt sadness and a fierce pride. And was beginning to see they were so much like Melly.

Rhett of course lavished them with attention. He took them out to see Fort Sumter, since Wade was excited about anything that had to do about the war. And he took the children all a long the Battery and King Street. Their second outing after the park, she had desperately wanted to go with them, but Eleanor had saw to it that she had to attend a boring lecture by a woman who supposedly was the backbone of the fight for women's rights in Charleston.

Scarlett could care less about things such as politics and voting. Politics had always bored her to tears. She had voiced that much after a lecture while Eleanor, Rosemary and her had been waiting for a cab.

"You mean to tell me Scarlett Butler that you don't want to vote?" Rosemary had demanded, shocked and looking at her as if she had grown horns.

"Why should I want to vote? What good will it do me with my children or my store? All I want is to never be poor again and have enough money that the Yankees can never take anything away from me. Vote, fiddle-dee-dee!"

"But Scarlett!" Rosemary had protested. "That's what America stands for. For freedom and rights. One-day women shall vote and be equal to men. Just think of how women have been treated can you honestly tell me that all your husbands had treated you well? Why if Rhett had ever wanted to, he could throw you out on the street penniless and divorce you."

That had hit too close to home and Scarlett's eyes narrowed in an instinctive fight mechanism. She could see how shocked Rosemary had been at the sudden change in her demeanor and Scarlett grabbed her arm a little too tightly.

"What do you mean by that?"

"I-I was only using an example," stammered Rosemary.

Eleanor witnessed the look on Scarlett's face and moved closer to her.

"Scarlett dear, are you all right?" She reached a hand towards her daughter-in-law but Scarlett instinctively pulled back.

She saw Rosemary's confusion and Eleanor's concern and her face softened. And grabbed Rosemary's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. She could tell both Butler women were shaken up by her anger.

"I'm sorry Rosemary and Eleanor. I didn't mean to sound so upset. I-I was distressed is all."

"Of course dear!" Eleanor cried and embraced Scarlett and Rosemary embraced both of them. Until all the Butler women were smiling again and all was well.

"And of course Rhett would never do such a thing," Eleanor had said to Scarlett. "He loves you and the children too much."

Yet, the words stuck with Scarlett through the week. They were always in the back of her mind. For Rhett had threatened to leave her penniless once and take Bonnie away from her hadn't he? Men could divorce women and take everything away from them in a heartbeat. He was all ready trying his best to be immune to her and had made it perfectly clear he was willing to divorce her...

And if she should fail to win Rhett back, though she didn't want to think of that. She had to think of a way to make sure that her and the children were always provided for and they had enough money. Assuring herself she had a few more months to win Rhett back and had never failed. But the fear was there like the mist in her dreams, always returning.

She was broken out of her reverie by the sound of the French doors opening out to the verandah where she was sitting undisturbed with a cup of tea. She looked up to see Lucille walking over to her.

"Miss Scarlett, Miss Eleanor wants me to tell you that she and Miss Rosemary are gettin' ready for the lecture this evening."

Scarlett let out a sigh. God's nightgown, not another lecture. But she heard that most of the Charleston society including Mrs. Brown would be there and she knew she had to grin and bear it. She had to do anything to get Rhett back even listening to those croaking old biddies.

"Tell them I'll be ready. You know Lucille you speak quiet well for a one time slave," Scarlett commented, interested in this tall, graceful woman.

Lucille did speak well with only a slight accent but her words were pronounced with the utmost care. And she held her head high and chin back in a way that would seem like arrogance, but Scarlett admired it. She could never stand for sniveling and illiterate darkies like Prissy.

"Thank you Miss Scarlett. When I was only eighteen years old Miss Rosemary come up to me. She was only a little girl in school but she was bright and learned. She asked me if I wanted to learn how to speak like a lady and read. And she taught me. The Butler's have always been so kind to me but..." Her voice faltered and Scarlett was surprised to see Lucille shudder.

"But?"

"The master had no liking for a woman to read, especially a slave."

Scarlett thought a moment. "You mean Rhett's father?" Lucille had her full attention now. She had often wondered about Rhett's father who he seemed to hate so much.

"Yes. He found me reading one night by candle light in the slave quarters. He beat me until I couldn't stand and he forbade me to read. Of course I didn't tell him who it was that taught me how to read. Else he would have..." she trailed off.

"You mean," she cried, "That he would have beat-"

Lucille nodded. "Mistha Harrison would have as surely beat that chile with the whip as me."

"But-"

Scarlett felt a sick feeling in her stomach. Of course she knew about slave beatings from their masters. Gerald had many a time had to discipline the darkies but he had never beaten them cruelly. He had always spoken with them and his disappointment was enough discipline. Indeed the most she had seen was a slap to a darkie, as she had done to Prissy.

And for a father to beat their own child! Why pa had never raised a hand to any of his daughters a day in their life, even though plenty of times they and deserved it.

"I'm sorry to distress you Miss Scarlett," Lucille said in a calm voice. "I shouldn't have said anything."

"No, I'm glad you did, Lucille. Thank you; I had always wondered how a son could be so far from their father. My pa and I were always so close. I was his favorite."

"You were fortunate then. Mistha Rhett wasn't so fortunate."

XXXXX

Later, as Scarlett mulled over what Lucille had said, pieces were beginning to fit together and with horror she realized perhaps Rhett's father had beat him. She couldn't voice this of course for Rhett would think she was prying and never could she work up the nerve.

As it was, the lecture was boring her to tears. She sat there amidst dozens of other women in chairs. Most were old biddies that looked ready to die any moment. Despite the fact that the weather was relatively cool outside, many women fanned themselves vigorously in the stuffy room.

Mrs. Brown was sitting to Scarlett's right and Eleanor to her left. Rosemary of course was leaned forward with excitement in her eyes. If only she didn't give into the nonsense of women's rights and dress so plain... Scarlett was sure Rosemary could have quiet a few callers and beaux. But Rosemary seemed to only be interested in the things that old crones did.

But Scarlett wasn't. Why should she be old before her time? She wanted to dance; laugh and do anything but sit in these boring lectures. She didn't realize it but she was staring off listlessly when Mrs. Brown touched her arm with a fan, causing Scarlett to jump. She looked over at Mrs. Brown with questioning eyes.

"I don't know about you Scarlett Butler, but I need some fresh air. Let's go for a stroll." She rose to her feet a little slowly as if she knew Scarlett wouldn't object.

Yet, Scarlett wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to get out of the lecture. She smiled and murmured near Eleanor's ear where she was going. Eleanor nodded and Scarlett followed Mrs. Brown out of the infernal room.

Once out in the foyer of Elizabeth Picketts home, she sighed and gave Mrs. Brown a knowing smile.

"You knew I wanted to get out of that lecture didn't you, Mrs. Brown?"

"Of course. I saw your eyes were glazing over. Now be a good girl and take me outside. I never could stand Elizabeth's drafty house."

"Why Mrs. Brown!" Scarlett cried with a slight laugh. In many ways Mrs. Brown reminded her of grandma Fontaine and Mrs. Tarlarten. Both outspoken and with sense. She offered her arm and the old woman seemed a little frail but she kept in step with her companion.

"So tell me Scarlett Butler, just why do you sit through these boring lectures and meetings?" Mrs. brown asked. "When I was your age, I didn't attend a single one."

"Well-I suppose for the cause."

Mrs. Brown croaked a laugh and shook her head. "Come now tell me the truth girl, I am not daft nor senile."

Scarlett opened the front door and both her and Mrs. Brown came out on the porch. Scarlett couldn't help but notice the deteriorating shape of the wooden porch and the bad shape of the house overall. Really, a woman should be ashamed to let her house get this awful. And the war was over with!

She helped Mrs. Brown sit down on a wicker chair and came to sit on the seat next to her. She let her eyes drift across the darkening sky and sighed.

"I am tired of being an outcast," she said, finally answering her question. "I want to be a part of society and I'm tired of people looking down their noses at me. But here I shan't let them. Someday I shall be a great lady."

"Oh is that right?" The woman asked with a chuckle. "I can help you. Heaven knows I know every one last family in Charleston. But I won't for you aren't telling me the whole truth. It is to impress your husband?"

"Why how did you- I mean I don't know what you mean."

"Hog wash. You know what I mean. It's evident you love that scalawag husband of yours just why you do, I'll never understand."

Scarlett's eyes sparked fire. "Don't you dare insult my husband to my face. He is no-"

"Hush!" the woman barked and Scarlett momentarily closed her mouth and curbed her tongue.

"I only want to know," she continued, "How it is that a woman of your spirit can have married Butler for love. It was that wasn't it?"

Scarlett remained quiet. She wasn't going to disclose information about her and Rhett. It was sacred and somehow sounded awful when others talked about her being so devoted to Rhett.

"Ah," chuckled Mrs. Brown. "So you weren't in love with him. Was it for his money, girl?"

"Yes-no. Oh why are you bothering me so about my private affairs it's none of your business?"

"You are right. But it is evident that you do love Butler. I will help you win his undying love but I must warn you that loving a Butler only brings misery."

Scarlett's startled eyes flew to Mrs. Brown's. "What on earth do you mean?"

"What I mean is that Harrison Butler never loved Eleanor Davis, he married her for children and for his reputation and that was it. It was evident that she loved him but he drank, beat and almost starved her to death. He only brought pain to all around him. Then there's Ross Butler, your husband's brother. He drinks as if it is going out of fashion. Never is he sober and it has got so bad that Eleanor had to forbade him from coming to her home since he is violent. Now you see what I mean. The Butler men are not capable of love."

"Rhett is not like that!" she vehemently declared, defending the man she loved. "He has always been good to my children and our daughter, why he loved her so. Never has a father been tenderer and he thinks about everyone but himself-" she stopped abruptly realizing he hadn't thought very much about her when he left her after Melly's death. But she wouldn't think about that now. Rhett had claimed to love her once and she was certain he loved her still.

"Where is Ross Butler?" she asked instead.

"At Dunmore living in those ruins. Everyone knows your husband goes and help him."

Scarlett stared at Mrs. Brown in surprise. Suddenly it made sense why Rhett didn't want her at Dunmore. Had it been because of his drunken brother and he had been trying to protect her or because he truly hadn't wanted her with him? She decided to believe the latter. Why he had only been trying to protect her! A ridiculous smile spread across her face.

"Why are you smiling?" Mrs. Brown archly asked.

"Nothing. Let's go back into the lecture."

Scarlett helped Mrs. Brown back into the stuffy room but felt as if she was floating and not walking. Rhett did care even if he denied it. She couldn't wait to return home and see him.

XXXX

When she returned home a few hours later it was to see a sight that surprised her, he was packing.

"What are doing?" she asked, standing by the door to their room in surprise.

"I have to go back to Dunmore for a few days," he simply said, looking at her. "In my absence you can spend time with the children."

"I don't want to-" she began but stopped as an idea came to her frantic mind. "Darling, why don't the children and I accompany you?"

His lip twitched down. "I think not. Dunmore is in no condition for the children. It's only rubble, Sherman saw to that. Besides it will give us some space and time a part if you will to think."

"Think?" she asked with an arch of her brow. "I have thought enough thank you very much. Oh, darling," she smiled softly as she walked near him. "I know you're only trying to protect me but I'll be fine-"

"What in the devil are you babbling about, Scarlett?"

"Mrs. Brown told me about your brother and how he stays at Dunmore."

She expected anger but when he threw back his head and laughed, she was shocked. Her eyes searched his and an annoyed frown came to her face for he wouldn't quit laughing. He wiped tears of mirth from his eyes as he stared at her.

"And you think the reason why I don't want you at Dunmore is to save you from my drunken brother?"

"Well isn't it?" she demanded.

"No, I assure you I have other reasons. I feel like you're suffocating me, Scarlett. You watch my every move and seem to hunt me down wherever I go."

Scarlett felt anger rise up within her as her foolish hopes were dashed. "Oh you cad! You are lying. I know you care and you're only trying to cover it up. Well after you kissed me-and well, and you are acting as if nothing had happened."

"I can't bear your silly notions, my pet. Now if you'll excuse me, I must continue packing. I'll be home in a few days."

She felt like a sullen child. One moment he was hot and the next cold. One moment he was kissing her and the next acting as if she were a stranger and not his wife. She wanted to stamp her foot or throw something at his mocking black head. She was about to reply when a knock sounded at the slightly open door and Rosemary peeked in.

"Come in Rosemary," Rhett said.

"Our conversation isn't over," Scarlett mutinously said, her eyes flashing.

"It ended long ago, my dear," Rhett muttered and pasted a smile on his face.

Rosemary entered, her eyes roving between her brother and sister-in-law. Scarlett looked angry, from her lowered, roving eyes and clenched jaw. Even Rhett's face looked strained but his eyes gave nothing away.

"Your carriage is ready, Rhett," she said, seeming to want to leave the strained atmosphere.

"Thank you Rosemary. I best say good-bye to the children."

Scarlett felt his eyes on her and she was sure she was shaking in anger. He was running off again and she could say nothing without making a fool of herself. And she had defended the cad! She felt Rhett's hands on her shoulders as Rosemary watched them. Her eyes met his and where she would have melted to be in his arms, her body was rigid as he gave her a chaste kiss to her cheek.

"Take care, my pet."

"I will without your presence," she said between clenched teeth. "Run to Dunmore, run away Rhett. As I recall that was what you were always good at."

She saw the befuddled expression in Rosemary's eyes but she didn't care, turning on her heel, she stomped out of the room, not sparing Rhett a glance. She fumed even as she felt an ache of emptiness take hold of her. She knew her dreams of bliss wouldn't be so easy now since he was avoiding her at every turn. There had to be a way, there had to! And suddenly it came to her, she knew what she had to do, she would follow him later to Dunmore Landing, enough was enough.

TBC


	21. A Glimpse

Note: Happy Mother's day. I hope you all like this next part… and it's not completely accurate I suppose about trees and boats (I know nothing about boats except that they float and Robert Fulton invented the Steamboat before the Civil War) but hopefully you all don't mind. Since it is not written for complete accuracy, although I wish I did take more time to do research.

Thank you: xXxlilnoel09xXx, EugeniaVictoria, missysammy, Tuduvant, PrincessAlica, tennisplayerx33, seeleysangel and Joyce LaKee. All of you wonderful fellow people have my gratitude and thanks foe keeping me going. Just hang in there, and we'll see a shift in the relationship between Scarlett and Rhett… very soon. Enjoy and please review.

Part 21

Rhett saw the familiar view of his childhood home as he stepped off of the riverboat onto solid land. His eyes scanned the Ashley River as it flowed quickly with the currents. The river was relatively short but it flowed into the Cooper River and into the mouth of the Charleston harbor. Jethro, the riverboat captain gave Rhett a wave.

"Gawd's speed Mistha Rhett," he said in his deep voice. "Tell Mistha Ross, I's say hello."

"I will," Rhett promised, raising up his hand in final getting. He wore his impeccable clothing of course. His gray trousers with black coat and his red caveat. As a man with means, he had never been one for dull clothing or colors, even in view of his setting. The war had raged across the land, but since he had the money, why wear rags? Though people had looked their noses down at him, he wouldn't bend to their rules as he hadn't bent to his father's.

The boat cast back out into the sluggish river. And as always, Rhett felt a sense of unease at the sight of his home and his duty of caring for his drunken brother. Ross, four years his junior had fled to Dunmore after his gambling debts had piled up after the war. It was in ruins but Ross didn't seem to have an ounce of pride left in him.

When Rhett did come to Dunmore, he was always met with the sight of a drunken Ross. Whiskey strong on his breath, eyes glazed and murmuring about the past. There was no help for Ross or a soul that would loan him money save Rhett, against his better judgment.

True, he had a lot of money. Spare money in fact that he threw around to Rosemary, Eleanor, Scarlett, the children and charities also a few investments. And he could very well give it to his brother. But Ross never seemed to appreciate it and he spent it on more alcohol and cigars. He had tried to cut down the amount he gave to Ross but if it weren't for him coming to Dunmore occasionally he knew his brother would drink himself to death, starve as their father had and have no human contact.

His mind wet back to 1866, the year he had last seen his father alive at Dunmore. The old man had just sat there in his bed, sunken and dying. Rhett had seen his mother weeping over her sick husband pitifully as he had fallen into a deep sleep.

"Don't weep for the bastard," Rhett had harshly said.

Eleanor had looked up at him with streaming eyes, her mouth trembling. "How can I not? I love him and he is my husband and your father."

"He is no father of mine," he had shot in disgust, glaring at the sick man. "He may have sired me but he disowned me. If I weren't fond of my grandfather I would have disowned the Butler name all together."

Only then did he hear raspy breathing and mother and son looked at the same time to the bed where Harrison Butler's glazed eyes were open and unblinking as he stared at his eldest son.

"Ross..." he whispered.

A look of disgust spread across Rhett's face, hardening and he sneered. "Don't worry your beloved son is down the street in a drunken stupor. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree does it father?"

Rhett turned on his heel and began to walk out of the room. He felt anger and an odd ache in his chest as the only man he had wanted to call for him, called for the son he loved.

"Rhett," Eleanor had cried to his retreating figure.

But he didn't turn back and that was the last time he saw his father alive.

He could still remember the look of his father's face. The look of Eleanor, her eyes lifeless and the bones visible on her face. The defeated and tear stained face of his sister sobbing. Ross's drunken stupor and raising hell with him and anyone within his reach. Not much had changed with Ross, Rhett thought as he came to the front door of Dunmore.

Opening it with his gloved hand he surveyed the house. It had once been grand, almost like Scarlett's Tara. With a sweeping staircase, chandeliers and dozens of Butler portraits. Harrison Butler had always been for extravagance and had wanted to impress his fellow aristocrats with his airs; money and political views while neglecting his family and for that Rhett would never forgive him.

There was a cold draft always present in Dunmore since there was little source of heating and there were cracks in the walls. He had wanted to renovate Dunmore for years but the other part of him wanted to leave the house like this. As Harrison Butler had come to ruin so had this house.

Oh, he would be a liar to say he didn't have emotional ties to the house. He had spent childhood here and a few good memories were present. But also the memories of his father's anger, abuse and neglect remained in this house. He didn't know why but anywhere he lived, whether the monastery in Atlanta or here in Charleston, there were the dark memories that seemed to haunt him. Of his father, pain, Bonnie, Scarlett and the many other demons he couldn't escape.

He came to the parlor door that was crooked on its hinges and pushed it open, knowing he'd find Ross sitting drunk in front of the fireplace. The room was dark and cold as he walked in and the sight that did meet his eyes was Ross sitting there, a bottle of whiskey in his hands and he was staring at the dying embers in the fireplace.

Rhett advanced in the room and Ross gave no inclination of hearing his brother. When Ross didn't move, Rhett kneeled in front of the fireplace and took the poker, stirring the ashes and adding a log. The flames leapt to life as it consumed the log and he rose to his feet, the firelight hitting him for an instant and Ross. Ross stared up at his brother with the famous mocking grin that the Butler men were known for.

"Hullo brother. I see you have returned to see me. Did you bring any whiskey?"

"No," Rhett simply said, still standing there and his eyes sweeping over the drunken Ross.

Ross shrugged and took a swallow of his whiskey. "Ah well. Where is your wife and darling children? You didn't leave that wife of yours alone again did you?"

"Scarlett and the children are fine," he said.

"It surprises me, Rhett," mused Ross, with a snigger at his lips. "When you came to Charleston oh about two years ago with your daughter... I could see you were a lovesick fool over your wife... Is there trouble in the love nest that you would keep leaving her?"

Rhett felt a rage at the mention of Bonnie and Scarlett upon his brother's lips. It wounded his pride that his brother had known how lovesick over Scarlett O'Hara he had truly been... well not anymore. He smiled mockingly and his brows rose.

"That is none of your business, Ross. What is between my wife and I is only between us."

Ross laughed and took another swig. Rhett observed his brother. Ross looked very much like the way he had looked after Bonnie's death. The high cheekbones were bloated and he had gained weight around his stomach. Rhett knew the affects of alcohol very well and saw that though Ross had always had the lighter skin of their mother, he seemed paler then usual.

"You shouldn't drink so much," he quietly said.

"And this is from a man who drank like a fish only a time before? I never knew you were a hypocrite my dear brother. I'll drink until heaven and earth pass away." Ross laughed, his dark glazed eyes appeared brighter then usual.

"Touché," Rhett said with a bow. "I'll leave you to your liquor."

Turning on his heel Rhett left the cold room. Destruction seemed evitable for Dunmore as well as his brother. A dark and troubled look came to Rhett's eyes as he sighed and made his way through the deserted halls.

XXX

_She wouldn't stay here like the abandoned wife. No, Scarlett O'Hara Butler didn't sit by in defeat. It was simple; she would follow Rhett to Dunmore. She had thought so before but now she was certain. Rhett could raise hell, but she wouldn't let him abandon her._

_Just how she would, she wasn't sure. She had no idea where Dunmore was, it could be in the middle of nowhere for all she knew. She sat out on the verandah with Rosemary, Eleanor and the children. They were having their lunch outside today since the weather had warmed up slightly, though there was a cool breeze, the sun peeked out from behind the clouds._

_Sitting there, Scarlett suddenly thought of something. She knew Eleanor would help her get to Dunmore to be with Rhett. Eleanor was her ally and she certainly wouldn't object to her and the children going to join Rhett, even if his brother was there. She would handle any man, even a drunken one. Many a time she had witnessed Gerald come home drunk and had helped him. And she had seen her fair share of Rhett being drunk._

_"Eleanor," Scarlett haltingly began to her mother-in-law sitting beside her._

_"What is it dear?" Eleanor's voice was easy and Scarlett smiled slightly her eyes downcast._

_"I know it is silly of me but I- miss Rhett. And I would like to join him at Dunmore with the children."_

_She wondered if Eleanor would buy her demure, submissive wife act but of course she truly did want to see Rhett. She missed him terribly. And if Rhett Butler thought he was ahead of her, he had another thing coming. She would not be abandoned or slighted._

_Eleanor looked uncertain. Her brows were creased with worry. "Oh, dear. I would love nothing better but you see-"_

_"Rhett's brother is there," Scarlett finished. "I know. But I'm certain that we will be fine. I took care of myself during the war. It won't be any problem meeting Rhett's brother. And I do believe the children would like to meet their uncle." There, she thought, that was thorough enough._

_There was a slight pause and then, "I will wire Rhett about your arrival..."_

_"No! I mean that is I so desperately wanted to surprise him. And you see if you told him you would ruin the surprise." Not to mention my plans, added Scarlett silently. If Rhett knew she was on her way to Dunmore he could stop her, she didn't doubt his influence and determination. She smiled modestly and ducked her head with a slight blush. She was an expert in being demure when she wanted to be. She looked like the perfect, bashful wife._

_"Of course not! It will be our secret and I know Rhett will be so happy. It is wonderful to see how devoted you are to him and now that you're here..."_

_"Yes, now that I'm here," she murmured with a triumphant look. She patted Eleanor's hand then looked over at Wade and Ella who were chatting with Rosemary. "Children how would you like to go see Uncle Rhett?"_

_There were shouts of exclamation from the children. And Scarlett leaned back with a satisfied sigh. Taking a sip of her tea, she couldn't keep the smile from her face. Rhett you think you have won, she thought, but the game has just begun. She pulled her mind from her thoughts and rose to her feet in purpose, she had to pack._

_xxx_

"Mama this river is named after Uncle Ashley," Ella chirped, holding tightly onto the railing as she stood on the first bar at the stern and leaned far over to see a view of the river. Her ginger curls blew gently across her face and she had eyes as wide as saucers as she took everything in.

"Ella be careful," Scarlett admonished. Her heart seemingly lodged in her throat as she watched her daughter lean far over to see a view of the waves crashing against the bottom. She looked almost as if she could fall into the river. God's nightgown that's just what she needed, seeing Rhett like a drowned cat.

Wade likewise went near Ella to look over and she saw him put a hand on her arm to protect her. She did smile slightly though at Ella and Wade's excitement. She knew they hadn't ever been on a steamboat or traveled much. Granted Wade had gone to New Orleans once with Rhett but he had been so young. The furthest they had been to was Marietta.

Taking in the sight of the sluggish river and feeling the cool breeze against her cheeks she relaxed. There was something oddly peaceful yet disquieting about this land. With the swaying cypress trees and swamps, it seemed almost haunted. Yet, when the slave trade had expanded more after 1793, the swamps began to be cleared out for rice tidal growing. And Scarlett, who knew physical beauty, saw Charleston wasn't as awful as she had once imagined.

She looked over at the man who was bringing them to Rhett. When Eleanor had brought them to the dock at the mouth of the river, the old man's face had a huge white grin that contrasted to his dark face and was very friendly.

His name was Jethro she found out. He had lived a long the river for years as a slave to a rich landowner. When his master had died before the war he had been freed and continued to live a long the river, driving his steamboat that was his pride and joy. It was a hobby of his but often times he would give Rhett a ride to Dunmore or do services for the old families he had known. Scarlett secretly admired him for his accomplishments and his steamboat was wonderful even if it was tiny.

"Your papa used to come a long this river with me when he was a boy," Jethro said to Wade and Ella who were listening to him with rapt attention, more so Wade.

Scarlett didn't correct the man that Rhett was their stepfather. He was absolutely a charming old man. In some ways he reminded her of Pork. She walked forward and came to stand beside Ella. Sparing Jethro a smile.

"Then you have known my husband long?"

He grinned, his weathered face reminiscent. "Yes'm. He shore was a mischievous boy. He'd come and see my master and me. I don't 'spect he's changed much. I've known the Butler's a good many a years."

"Look mother!" yelled Wade in excitement. His eyes danced as he pointed at a huge crane standing among the bushes. Scarlett smiled at his excitement and was slightly surprised for usually he was as quiet as a mouse around her. She was glad to see him more open and felt less bad about her mothering skills. She wasn't such a bad mother after all.

"Do you see the bird Ella?" She asked her daughter.

Ella shook her head. "Where is it?"

"Ah Ella," Wade grumbled, "It's right in front of your face! Right there." He pointed at it and as the boat began to pass, the bird suddenly took flight and Ella squealed, grabbing Scarlett's skirt and staying firmly lodged against her leg.

"Ella Lorena!" Scarlett cried laughing, looking down at her daughter. "Don't tell me you are a afraid of a silly bird."

When Ella didn't reply or move, Wade shot her a disgusted look.

"You are such a girl."

Ella frowned. "I am not!" She stuck out her tongue at her brother who frowned.

"Ella Lorena!" Scarlett blushed at Ella's lack of manners and spared a glance at Jethro. He was merely laughing silently with tears streaming down his black face. She was about to reprimand her, but her lip. She mustn't seem too harsh if she was to win Rhett back.

"I can shore tell you two are siblin'," Jethro said to the children. He pointed out at the trees. "Those are cypress trees. I spect ya don't see those in Georgia much."

The children shook their heads and Scarlett drew nearer to Wade and Ella to get a better look. She unconsciously placed her hands on Wade's shoulders and his chest puffed out in slight pride. He didn't move lest his mother realize what she was doing.

Thus Scarlett, Wade and Ella with a darkie continued down the river towards Dunmore Landing. Rhett wasn't far from her now. The sun was slightly setting as the shrill cry of a bird reached her ears and even Ella jumped in surprise.

Jethro laughed and the children's laughter followed. They would soon be at Dunmore Landing and to Rhett, Scarlett silently added with a self-satisfied smirk on her face.

TBC


	22. At Dunmore Landing

Note: Here is the next chapter... Sorry it took so long but I have been slightly depressed and stressed so I haven't had any inspiration… Well except for re-reading the wonderful reviews. Thank you Tuduvant (It will pick up speed for sure in chapter 24), seeleysangel, EugeniaVictoria, tenisplayerx33, missysammy, PrincessAlica, xXxlilnoel09xXx, JoyceLaKee and genasyz.

Just to let you all know, things will have a change in chapter 24… so it will be a little slow nxt chapter but you all have stuck this long to it  Thank you. Enjoy.

Part 22

Through the cypress trees plantations came into view. Scarlett didn't know which was Dunmore and she watched each one as the boat passed by it. She thought she would know Rhett's childhood home and she felt excitement course though her at the thought of seeing him and seeing Dunmore landing.

Holding onto the railing she stared ahead, as still as a Grecian statue and her hair blowing about her. The tendrils had long escaped the pins and for a moment one would think she was a part of this land. Her face didn't belie her inner turmoil or excitement as she clutched the railing with her pale hands.

Suddenly through the branches and low hanging leaves, did Dunmore Landing come into view. The lateral columns were not as erect or proud as the former days. Yet, she wouldn't have known it for this was the first time she had laid eyes on the home, some part of her knew this was Dunmore even as with a sigh of almost reverence, Jethro said the name of the home.

Green, keen eyes scanned every line of the home. The wide porch, columns and dull color of the once brightly colored home. It appeared even darker due to the dark shadows caused by the cypress trees and oak that shrouded it in darkness. She felt a sense of trepidation as the boat completely stopped at the bank and Jethro made preparations for her and the children to depart.

"Does Mistha Rhett know you and the chilluin are coming?" Jethro asked as Wade, Ella and Scarlett grabbed their bags.

"No," she said, "It is a surprise." She forced a smile. You are no ninny and a coward, she chided herself. Lifting her chin a notch she smiled brightly at the children. "This is where Uncle Rhett grew up."

Ella looked fearful and Wade hesitant as Jethro swung himself off from the deck and came to stand on the bank. He first helped the children down then took Scarlett's hand. The moment her feet touched the solid ground she smoothed out her skirts. She felt a tug at her sleeve and knew it was Ella who was desperately trying to capture her attention. Scared hazel eyes stared up at her.

"Mama do trolls live here?"

Wade snorted and Scarlett sighed. Sometimes Ella had such silly notions.

"Ella Lorena what absurd questions you have! Of course trolls don't exist. Who ever told you such a thing?"

"Mammy," Ella whispered, looking around. "And you said I was to always listen to Mammy."

Scarlett was about to reply but thought better of it. There was no use discussing such things as foolish as trolls. She offered her hand warmly to Jethro who gladly took her hand in his.

"Thank you. I certainly wouldn't have found my own way here by myself," she said, her eyes dancing. "If there is any way I can repay you..."

He looked chagrined. "No Misses Rhett. Friends don't do that. You jus' enjoy yerself and take good care of those chilun."

Scarlett nodded as she watched Jethro climb back into his boat. It pulled with the current and he started it up. With a wave he was off with the river. The child enthusiastically waved.

"Bye, Jethro!" Ella cried, her fear forgotten. Her child-like voice seemed to echo through the wind and trees.

"Bye!" Wade hollered with a wave.

The three lingered there for a moment, before Scarlett turned, grabbing her bag with definite action. The children followed her as they walked across the soft ground and their feet slightly sank against the soft soil under their soles. All though the house wasn't much to be desired, she saw, the ground was lush and she knew Rhett could make a profit off this land. And the house had potential too.

Upon advancing closer, she saw indeed the house was to the point where it was decaying and crumbling almost down to the foundation. The walls still stood but it was evident of the devastation that had swept through Charleston by Sherman only nine years before.

The house was shadowed. But she could see the dark hues with the light. The walls were a dark brown of strong wood that had held up but was now decaying slightly. The rest of the house had two white columns in front with a flat, dark roof and white fencing around the long porch. There were many windows to let light in, if not for the trees that had greatly overshadowed it due to neglect.

The house was not overly high as was accustom in Charleston. Since it was known as the low county, the fashion were homes that were low yet large. Dunmore Landing seemed overly masculine and not a hint of femininity. Strange that a house could seem to have traits that bespoke of its previous owners.

"It's as I thought it would be," Wade said with a touch of awe.

"It's scary," Ella said, placing her hand in Scarlett's so tightly that she slightly flinched as her daughter's nails dug into her flesh. She pulled her hand away.

"Now, Ella you be a brave girl. There are no trolls..." Yet Scarlett felt an odd feeling of depression and sadness sweep through her as she looked at the house with a sweep of her eyes and they advanced closer.

The porch loomed before them. There weren't per say stairs leading up to the porch but one step up led them onto the porch and a few steps to the mahogany door. She spared a glance at the children. Poor Ella looked petrified and Wade's eyes were wide as they roved the architecture and he drank everything in.

"Be on your best behavior," she warned mildly. "You wouldn't want your Uncle Ross to be disappointed would you?"

They mutely shook their heads as Scarlett raised a dark gloved hand and knocked. Her heart seemed to beat madly in her chest as she waited. She felt like fleeing, not knowing if she could face Rhett. Oh what was the matter with her? Rhett had always knocked her off balance. Whenever she saw him, his dark eyes and twisting lips, she turned into a fool. She could scarcely breath when he was near her! And yet he remained unresponsive. She determined that would all change here. Even if the house didn't leave much to be desired, she would bear it. Anything for Rhett.

Hearing the doorknob rattle she pasted a cheerful smile on her face. The door opened a crack and a man loomed there, dark eyes bloodshot and his face unshaven. For a moment it was as if she were staring at a lighter version of Rhett. His hair was thick like Rhett's; save it was a dark chestnut hue with no gray at the temples. His face was lighter and the affects of alcohol were evident in the slightly puffy and sagging lines. And if not for that, he would be as handsome as Rhett.

She smiled and walked right in past him, the children following her a little slowly.

"Oh what a journey," she said with a sigh and a giddy laugh. She wondered if she could charm him so easily and turned her full charm. "You must be Ross, Rhett's brother. I am Scarlett."

She saw a blank look come to his face as he took her in with a sweep of his bloodshot eyes, suddenly recognition came to his eyes.

"Then you must be my big brother's infamous wife... and your children." He spared them a glance but his eyes were again on hers.

She felt slightly discomforted but didn't let it show as she smiled. "Yes. I couldn't wait to see Dunmore and of course join Rhett. He is here isn't he?" She looked around the foyer, hoping it wasn't too obvious how uneasy she felt.

"He went for a walk," he said, his tone clipped.

"Oh," she murmured with a look of disappointment.

Looking up she saw Ross was watching her with a cool look. She felt the hair stand up on the back of her neck, it was much the look Jonas Wilkerson had given her years before. Where she couldn't read what was in Rhett's eyes nor could she in Ross' eyes. But the difference was that Ross seemed cold and Rhett had warmth.

"Well," she said. "I suppose you wouldn't mind showing me around the place?"

She wondered just how drunk he was but he hid it well. He nodded and Ella and Wade seemed to instinctively move closer to Scarlett as he came forward a little slowly. A smile came to his lips, briefly changing his face and softening it if it were possible.

"I would be delighted, we are family after all." He took her hand and held it to his lips too long in her opinion where she shifted uncomfortably.

At that moment, Rhett decided to make an appearance. Turning her head as the door opened, she saw black eyes staring at her and they weren't happy or overjoyed at seeing her. Ross released her hand and Rhett's eyes roved in between her and his brother.

"Hello darling!" she said with a giddy voice. His face was as unreadable as always as she quickly ran to him, as any devoted wife would do and gave him a full smile. She stopped in front of him and looking up at his face, she lowered her eyes before they met his again and were shining with triumph.

"Well aren't you going to kiss me?"

"Of course," he murmured and she was disappointed when he kissed her chastely on her cheek. Her eyes registered her disappointment. He had gone back to his full height. She couldn't make it seem in front of Ross that Rhett didn't desire her or wasn't in love with her. It was a game but she knew he would have to kiss her properly and she was dying to be in his arms again.

"I meant properly," she flirtatiously said. She saw his dark eyes flicker and she lowered her eyes.

"By all means kiss your wife properly, Rhett," Ross intervened.

In an instant and before she could catch her breath, she was in his arms. It was like the day he had proposed to her. Her mind reeled but the only difference was this kiss was welcomed. His lips went hard against hers and she could scarcely breath as she clutched him to her. She could feel the heat of his back against her fingers. And remembered he had trembled then only this time she was trembling.

Letting out a breath as he pulled away, her eyes shot open with disappointment. To her chagrin he seemed to not be equally affected by the kiss they had just shared. .

"Was that proper enough?" he asked, grabbing her arms from around his neck and placing them down at her sides.

"Quiet," she said a little too breathlessly.

Scarlett looked over at Ross who was watching them with a grin. Ross seemed to enjoy this exchange and suddenly with sickening clarity she knew that Ross knew things were bad between her and Rhett. How dare Rhett tell Ross and how embarrassing! She pulled her last shred of dignity around her.

"If you'll excuse me Ross," Rhett was saying, "Scarlett and I have a lot to discuss."

"By all means," Ross replied, his eyes going to Scarlett. "I'll show the children their rooms."

Scarlett had forgotten the children but there they were. They stood by the front door, looking slightly confused and fearful. Ross ushered them out of the foyer and up the stairs. As soon as they had disappeared, Rhett grabbed her arm and forcefully pulled her with him down the hall and into a room, shutting the door behind him.

"I shouldn't have put it past you that you would chase me to Dunmore," he said in a low voice, anger in his eyes. "Damnit Scarlett! I don't want you here."

That stung her. Hot words went to her lips but looking into his eyes she saw he was angry. And the countless times Rhett had been angry with her it had been because he cared. He did care that she could be defenseless to his drunken brother. She smiled instead and he started at her as if she had gone insane. But surely she could charm him. She had done so once when he had bee in jail and he had almost believed her.

"Oh darling," she said, walking over to him and placing a hand on his stiff arm, looking up at his face. "I know you only don't want me here because you are trying to protect me. I can take care of myself. It is sweet of you to worry so. I surely didn't come here to see the scenery but you-"

"I'm sorry to disappoint you Scarlett but I could care less about your safety here. I want peace of mind and some space from you."

Her eyes narrowed. "I would give you space if there was any space to give!" she shouted. She lowered her voice. "Deny it all you want Rhett but I know you still want me. I could tell when you kissed me."

"Oh that?" he asked with a careless flick of his hand. "That was only an act. I did tell you I would be the picture oft he loving husband didn't I?"

She felt angry and frustrated. She knew if she yelled and raged it would only amuse him. She forced herself to smile confidently as she walked past him and shot him a last look, triumph in her eyes.

"Say what you want but I know that you love me."

"You seem sure of yourself," he shot back with a laugh.

"I am Rhett, I am."

He couldn't resist adding, "Just as you were sure that Ashley loved you at one time."

Her smile briefly faded and her eyes shimmered with a slight annoyance. She forced a laugh. "He was only infatuated with me. But you are in love with me."

She saw he was about to reply when they both heard someone clear their throat out in the hall. Scarlett turned to see Ross Butler standing there with a grin. Suddenly, she knew it was childish but she wanted to make Rhett jealous. She knew that was a way she could get a reaction from him and the thought that he would be jealous thrilled her. She smiled at Ross.

"You simply must show me around Dunmore Landing," she declared, walking over to him and grabbing his arm. She looked over at Rhett with a smile and was the picture of sweetness. "Surely you don't mind, darling?"

He started forward and she thought he would refuse but he didn't. He merely moved past her and Ross carelessly. "Of course not, my pet. Whatever amuses you." Then he was gone leaving her frustrated and stuck with Ross Butler.

XXX

Rhett had watched Scarlett flirt shamelessly with Ross during supper. At first it had greatly amused him, especially seeing Scarlett's frustration when he seemed immune to it. But now he was in a vile mood.

He shouldn't have put it past Scarlett to chase him to Dunmore then flirt with his brother. He remembered how shamelessly she had chased after Ashley. She had fought, pleaded, cried and did anything to get her way. But he was determined that she wouldn't conquer him.

She had once. He knew once she had him, she would have used his love against him. That was what he had always feared and sensed. Her green eyes would blaze with triumph. Even now she could still get under his skin. And when he had kissed her, God he had been more affected by it then he had let on. She had been trembling in his arms as he had imagined her doing. She had been responsive and for once he didn't need to wonder if it was Ashley she was imagining.

If only he cared as he once had. But he didn't. He told himself those feelings were gone. Once he would have prayed to hear the words from her lips. Now they were meaningless. He was her current infatuation and she thought she could win him. He was in a foul mood even as he was having more fun then he had in a long time. This time he would have the upper hand.

Supper had ended and after a few hours of the children running around and Ross, Scarlett and him having a drink in the parlor. It was time for the children to go to sleep. Scarlett had disappeared and he wasn't sure where she was but he decided looking for her would only bring trouble.

Walking up the stairs he first went to Ella's room. She was sound asleep and her face peaceful. Walking over to he bed, he watched her as he had lovingly watched Bonnie in her sleep. Yet, he couldn't bring himself to sing the silly songs Bonnie and him used to sing. He couldn't forget this little girl wasn't Bonnie even though she was as close to Bonnie as he could get. The two girls had been inseparable.

Leaning over, he gently kissed her forehead. She didn't move an inch but let out a deep murmur. He smiled and left the room. Next going to Wade's. He was surprised to hear the sound of voices and pausing outside to the door, he heard Scarlett's unmistakable voice. Peeking in, he saw Scarlett was perched on the edge of Wades' bed.

"Thank you for watching over Ella, Wade," she was saying softly. "You are quiet the gentleman."

"Aunt Melly taught me," he admitted, with his head bowed. "Do you still miss her mother?"

She sighed. "Of course I do Wade. She was like a sister to me. A better sister then Suellen or Careen. Someday I'll tell you more about her…"

Rhett listened and was surprised to see Wade throw his arms around Scarlett for a tight hug. He expected to see her push him away as she had been in the habit of doing. But she awkwardly patted his back and held him loosely back. Rising to her feet, she soothed his hair.

"Good night, Wade."

He echoed goodnight and Rhett pulled back, waiting in the shadows for her to come out. Once she did and shut the door behind her he stepped forward.

"Scarlett."

She jumped in surprise. Spinning around, her hand flew to her chest. She looked so startled that his mouth twitched with laughter.

"God's nightgown, Rhett! You nearly scared me to death." Suddenly her eyes narrowed. "Were you listening by the door?"

"You caught me," he chuckled.

He was pleasantly surprised when she reluctantly smiled. "Well you once told me eavesdroppers hear highly entertaining things."

"I said that?" he asked.

She yawned slightly. "I remember everything you say."

There was a silence. He motioned for her to follow him and they walked towards his room, knowing he was cornered into sharing the same bed with her. He would be damned if he threw Scarlett towards his brother and the house was too drafty and cold at night for anyone to think about sleeping on the floor. With Scarlett close to him he could watch over her.

Going into the room he once occupied as a child, he saw Scarlett observe her surroundings. As long as he had known her she always did have a good eyes for architecture. Which was what surprised him that she would build the horror of a house that they had in Atlanta. But he hadn't contested, wanting her to have her heart's desire.

The room was larger then his one on Battery. There was no mahogany desk or rug, the things that many took for granted. It was cold and his eyes strayed to the bed. It was much smaller and he saw Scarlett's eyes also go there. He hid a grin as she blushed and lowered her eyes. Sometimes she still seemed so innocent.

"We'll be sharing a bed here," he simply said, gauging her reaction.

She simply nodded. But he saw her eyes become a little uneasy and fearful. He wondered if she was nervous or she didn't want to share a bed with him after all. He left the room to let her prepare for bed.

Once in the hall, he pulled out a cigar and smoked deeply. He knew this would be an interesting night. Scarlett and him hadn't shared a bed in years. Many a times, especially after Bonnie's death, he had seen her door ajar, inviting him to enter. But he hadn't the nerve to. He had known it was another trap to lure him deeper to her. He hadn't trusted himself as he hadn't trusted her.

After he finished his cigar, he knocked lightly on the door and waited.

"Come in," she said, her voice muffled. He entered and saw that she was all ready in bed and laying under the covers. It reminded him of the early days of their marriage and he stared at her for a moment, his mind going to those days. He saw the smile she gave him.

"Well are you going to stand there all day?" she asked amusement in her voice.

That was the Scarlett he was used to. He wasn't used to the demure, blushing one that she had acted like earlier. He was used to her speaking her mind, her temper and her tactics.

He slowly removed his caveat and coat. Undoing his buttons to his shirt and waistband of his pants, he felt her watching him. She watched him with a slight blush at her cheeks but her eyes had admiration in them and fire.

"You're staring, Scarlett," he said.

"I always thought you were the most muscular man I have ever seen," she admitted with a shrug. "Is it a crime for me to admire you?"

"No," he slowly said. He wouldn't let her flattery draw him in either. It was too late for that. Putting on his robe he walked over to his side of the bed and saw that she had left it open to him. It surprised him that she remembered after all these years of not sharing a room, that he preferred the right side.

Slipping in between the cool coverlets, the bed shifted and sank under his weight. He turned and placing his head on his arm he came face to face with Scarlett. Her eyes were boring into his and her hair was across her shoulders and spread against the white pillow, an urge came over him to run his fingers through the silky tresses. He had always loved the feel of her hair.

"It's awfully cold, Rhett," she murmured. "Would you hold me?"

But that would be a grave mistake. So instead he handed her more coverlets and tucked them around her body.

"You'll warm up quick enough."

He saw the frustration in her eyes as he extinguished the lights. He heard her sigh in frustration. His body was rigid until he heard her breathing shift and he had known she had fallen asleep. Then he quietly slipped out of the room.

TBC


	23. Courage in the storm

Note: It's been awhile since I last posted so here is the next part! A huge thank you to all you wonderful people: tennisplayerx33 (I might actually take your advice about Ross kissy Scarlett haha), seeleaysangel, missysammy, EugeniaVictoria, PrincessAlica, xXxlilnoel09xXx and Joyce LaKee. I'm glad you are still interested.

Originally the first part of this chapter was a separate, shorter chapter but I decided to combine them to make the action come faster and sooner. And I know nothing about sailing so I did borrow text from _Scarlett_ about the capsizing of the boat. Enjoy and please review!

Part 23

Hours later with a glass of brandy as company, Rhett sat in the parlor. His long legs were stretched out on a stool and his robe was close to his body. He thought deeply of his next course of action. Thwarting Scarlett was a challenge and it made him feel alive. Maybe that was what had drawn him all those years ago to her in the first place.

He had pursued her longer then any other woman. At first it had been a challenge to charm her and make her admit that she loved him. His plan hadn't worked. Now, the challenge remained of not giving in, being immune to her charms and not letting her capture him. Scarlett had always wanted the things she couldn't have, and apparently she claimed to want him.

The clock chimed two o'clock. He stared at the dying embers in the fireplace as they gave their last crackling sounds. His face appeared to be made of granite but his eyes became glazed, a slight quirk to his lips as he thought back to the past. Thinking of the first time he had laid eyes on Scarlett and all the years he had known her, her stubbornness and spirit that always drew him.

Suddenly he heard a loud cry, a scream pierce the silence. In an instant he was on his feet and set down his glass. He wondered if he had imagined it as he strained his ears but the cry only became louder and he strode quickly out of the parlor.

In the hall the cries only intensified to sobs, almost an unearthly sound. Taking the stairs two at a time, he went into the room where the cries were being produced and saw Scarlett madly thrashing in the bed. Her arms were fighting something and her head moved back and forth.

"Melly! Melly! Come back," she cried.

He was across the room and bent over her, gently shaking her. She was having another nightmare and fought him slightly. Tears were on her face in a wild torrent and a gasping sob emerged from her lips as she mouthed, "Melly," again and it broke his heart as he gathered her in his arms.

"Darling wake up," he soothed, his arms tightly around her and bringing her to his chest. She quit fighting and her eyes slowly opened to stare into his.

"Rhett? Oh Rhett, it was awful!"

A feeling of tenderness swept in him as it had for Bonnie. He stared down at her vulnerable face. The face staring back at his was pale in the darkness and her eyes shimmered with tears.

"Tell me about it, honey," he lightly encouraged her, his arms still around her.

"I haven't had it since I left Atlanta. Oh but it was awful. I saw Melly in the mist, Rhett. And the mist took her away. I fought at it and clawed at it desperately. And I knew it was my fault she was gone. I was so alone and everyone had left me!"

"It was only a nightmare. You're safe and that four course meal probably didn't help."

She looked gratefully up at him. "You always help me, Rhett." Her arms tightened around him. Eyes were soft in the darkness, not narrowed, calculating or determined.

He looked down at her, aware of her more then ever in his arms. She was pliant and soft against him. The attraction between them was evident and he would be a fool to deny it. He might not love her but he would always be drawn to her as a moth was drawn to a flame.

As always his alert eyes saw that her lips were slightly parted and inviting. Everything from the tilt of her head to her eyes seemed to draw him. He lowered his mouth to hers and could taste the saltiness of her tears. The kiss deepened and her arms wound around his back. Hands moving sensually across his back as her lips surrendered to his.

Running his hands through her hair, he had been right, the silken tresses were as soft as he remembered. Framing her face in his hands the kissed deepened, her hands going to his head and running her fingers through his hair. She drew him closer and suddenly he felt as a man felt when he was drowning. Powerless and he realized that he was giving in again to her like a fool. He roughly pulled away and got to his feet, his eyes narrowed as he stared down at her.

"You're poison to my blood," he roughly said. His breathing was ragged and he could hear hers. Even in the darkness he could almost see her triumphant eyes and smile. "I'll be damned if I am played a fool again."

As always he was the one to roughly leave the room. Following him was a crash of something priceless against the door-a vase but he just missed it as the door shut behind him.

XXX

A few days after departing Dunmore Landing, a strained silence remained between Scarlett and Rhett. Mostly it was Scarlett's icy anger at him for kissing her and then treating her as if it were her fault. Rhett wouldn't give into her temper or pouts. Now he waited at the bottom of the stairs for her to come down so that they could get this day over as quickly as possible.

He saw her coming down the stairs, observing the garb she was wearing for their sailing trip, the one his mother had bribed him into doing. She wore one of his mother's old dresses that had been stored in the attic for years. It was brown and heavy, almost wool like and buttoned to Scarlett's chin and a long with that, she wore a wide brimmed straw hat that made her look like a coolie worker. In short she was covered head to toe. His brow skidded up and she glared at him.

"You don't look too well yourself," she shot back peevishly, the Scarlett he knew so well. She folded her arms.

She didn't see how he could criticize her. He was the one who ignored her. It was his fault that there was such a strained silence between them. After his stunt at Dunmore where he had discarded her, she wasn't ready to be nice. She had all she could take from him.

Her eyes swept over him, trying her best to be impersonal. He wore old breeches, no coat and only a white shirt that was open at the collar. She swallowed, why must he be so attractive? Never mind that she had only seen him dressed in the best fashion. Even if he did look like a field hand, he still affected her just the same. She set her jaw stubbornly.

"You said nine o'clock, Rhett. And I believe it is that. Shall we go?"

Bowing mockingly, he said, "Of course, my dear. Heaven forbid that we should be late."

XXXX

She didn't know why she had let Eleanor talk her into going sailing with Rhett. Once she would have gloried at it. To be alone with him was bliss, but now that she knew he wouldn't budge, despite her determination, a steady resentment had built up within her. It would serve him right if he drowned or she did for that matter.

As long as she pretended she hated him, he couldn't use her feelings against her. Walking to the boating dock, Rhett grabbed her arm lightly to guide her. And despite herself, she felt herself softening under his light touch. She spared him a glance and he grinned.

"I do believe you'll like the widow, Scarlett."

"The widow?" she asked with an arch of her brow.

"I named my boat after you," was all he said, his eyes dancing.

"You what?" she asked, stopping so suddenly she nearly slipped on the wet dock and began to sway until Rhett steadied her. He was still slightly holding her with a restraining hand as he pointed at the small sailing boat to her left. It was gently rolling against the waves. The boat was white washed and sure enough with black letters it read: The Widow. Her eyes flew to his.

"Why, how long have you had this boat?"

His lips twitched and he shrugged nochantly, looking out at it. "After the war."

"And you name it after me? In case you have forgotten I am no longer a widow."

"Touché. Yet, if you remember what I said all those years ago about the custom of the wife being buried alive with her husband?"

She remembered that horrid custom. He had told her that at the Atlanta Bazaar. Even then he had been horrid to her, always mocking her. "If you died," she said loudly, "I would never be buried with you."

The Irish temper had risen at the reference of her as a widow. She wasn't sure if he was mocking her. But she was irritated and there was tightness about her chest. Worst of all he had named his boat after her and not pleasantly! The least he could have done was named it a nice name. He always mocked her and belittled her. Why did she have to love him? He didn't deserve her love but she did just the same.

Rhett didn't say anything as he looked out at the boat. The ladder was old and looked liked it could easily break. It led a few feet down to the boat.

"It's low tide," he said after a moment, "We should go. I'll go first, I wouldn't want you to break your neck before we cast out."

She had a sharp retort but held it back, watching him as he lowered himself on the ladder and moved agilely down it. Despite his big body he moved with a gracefulness.

"Come on," he urged, holding out his hands to aid her climb.

"You went down that thing as if you were waltzing," she said with honest admiration as she turned her back towards him and went to her knees, placing a booted foot on one of the steps and lowering her self. Feeling his arms on her waist as she slowly moved down the ladder and held onto the slimy wood with a grimace.

Scarlett's feet touched the deck and Rhett released her. Turning to face him, she saw that he had all ready turned his attention to making preparations to cast off. She found a seat at the stern and watched him.

The wind gently ruffled his hair and he seemed to be in his element. The boat was awfully cramped in her opinion but he moved about as if it were a large ferry. He freed the lines and pushed away from the pier with a paddle. The tide pulled the boat instantly into the water.

"Put your head on your knees," he ordered.

"What?" she asked with a frown. But did what he had said. He hoisted the jib, cleated halyard and sheet, and the narrow sail filled with wind, flowing gently and expanding.

He sat unexpectedly beside her and hooked his elbow over the tiller between them. His sleeves had long been rolled up to his elbows. And his tanned arms sprinkled with dark hair were in her vision. She couldn't drag her eyes from the tanned skin and play of muscles. With his two able hands he began to haul up the mainsail. Those hands had once touched and caressed her. She blushed at her train of thought.

There was noise of rattling and she saw that his dark eyes were squinting against the sky and sun. He was frowning for a moment. But he looked more at ease then she had seen him around her.

The main sail bellied out with a booming snap and Rhett grinned.

"She's a faithful good old girl!"

Scarlett rolled her eyes. He was more proud of that blasted boat then he had ever praised her. It reached her mind that she was jealous of some old hunk of wood and laughed. Rhett shot her a look and she shrugged daintily as she rose to her feet and rocked as the boat suddenly lurched forward without warning, she caught her footing as they came further and further away from the shore.

"Want to turn back?" he asked.

"Never!" she cried. Priding herself for never being seasick or afraid like some other silly girls. And with Rhett here by her side, she wasn't. She felt safe as she always had with him.

Admiration shun in his eyes. "I applaud you for your courage, Mrs. Butler."

His voice was sincere and she warmed under his words. It was so hard to stay mad at the cad! She supposed she could swallow her anger and be pleasant. After all he was being more agreeable. She smiled and breathed in the fresh air.

The wind picked up the further they went out. She shivered slightly; she should have brought her coat. Rhett as always seemed to sense her needs and slowly walked to the cockpit, bringing a sweater to her that was old and worn out to a faded gray color.

"Put this on, Scarlett, you'll catch your death."

"It's not that cold," she said, eyeing the sweater with keen dislike. She looked around. "What if someone sees me?"

He threw back his head and laughed. "I doubt people will question your fashion taste out here. Anyway, there is no one miles around us… The wind is picking up."

Looking around, she finally relented and grabbed the offered sweater. Taking her hat off, she handed it to him and he wordlessly took it. Slipping the sweater over her head, she got stuck for a moment in the fabric and Rhett laughed. She couldn't see him as she struggled.

"Rhett!"

"Very well," he silkily said and she felt his hands tug on the sweater, pulling it over her head. Her pins flew out and her hair came undone out of the neat plait she had done. The tresses whipped against her face.

"Oh Rhett! My hair is ruined!" A piece of dark hair flew into her mouth and she sputtered.

"You are delightful, my pet."

Despite the mess she was in and she probably would go bald, she smiled. Taking her hat from his hands and she placed it on her head. At that moment, as chance would have it, her stomach decided she was hungry and growled rather loudly.

"I don't suppose you have something to eat?" she asked.

"You just had breakfast an hour ago. Restrain yourself until lunch." He shot her a devilish look. "But I did bring a bottle of wine."

"Fiddle-dee-dee, we'll have enough sea water with it spraying me so!" But her words were playful. She was enjoying herself, and even the slight hunger pangs she had, could be put on hold for later. Uncharacteristically she spanned out her arms and closed her eyes, feeling the wind buffeting against her body.

"Careful, you might fly away," he said close to her ear.

She opened her eyes and met his. He had a grin on his face. But moved away from her and went to free the tiller and came around. She saw his alert eyes scan about seeing if there were vessels that might be coming their way.

"I told you, it's just us, my pet," he commented with a wink. Her heart fluttered.

"I wish we could stay out here forever!" she impulsively said. "I hate all those old Charlestonians staring at me. Rhett, please say we can be out here all day!"

"Sorry, but I have a meeting in two hours." His voice sounded a little sorry also or did she imagine it?

"Oh bother your meeting, Rhett Butler! It's only us today and we shall have fun." She flung out her arms again and like a child, ran to the bow and stared at the foaming water as the boat rocked and lunged down into the waves, flying upward.

"Careful," he mildly chided. "I wouldn't want you to fall in."

But she wasn't listening until his urgent voice captured her attention.

"Look, Scarlett. Out on the starboard. I bet you haven't seen a sight like this before."

Her eyes scanned the rolling waves. And her mouth dropped open as she saw a gray object in the water. It was large and disappeared beneath the surface. Suddenly a few popped up and began to head towards the boat.

"God's nightgown! Rhett, they're sharks." She threw herself at him, staring at the fish with fright. "Do something!"

Looking down at her, his hands on her shoulders, he threw back his head and laughed. "My pet, those aren't sharks. They're dolphins. Watch them. They love to play."

Green, wide eyes looked up at him to see if he were teasing. But his face was serious. Sure enough they began to glide through the water a long the boat. She watched them excitedly and Rhett watched her. One flew high mid-air and fell into the water, letting out a cry. She grabbed Rhett's hand tightly.

"Did you see that? I never knew fish were so well-interesting."

"I saw it," he agreed with a laugh. "I've seen my share of dolphins. I always thought it looked like they were smiling."

"They are," she confidently said, coming to sit down on the seat. She felt a little winded, preferring to watch the dolphins leaping in the air from her seat. This game went on for minutes until suddenly they disappeared and didn't come back to the surface.

"Oh, Rhett, they're gone! How awful." She sighed like a disappointed child. "Well, that was fun while it lasted. I'll have to tell Wade and Ella."

During the excitement of watching the dolphins, Rhett didn't notice the dark clouds spreading across the horizon. His first warning was when the steady fresh wind suddenly dropped. The billowing sails went limp. He looked then when it was too late over his shoulder and saw the squall racing over the water and sky.

TBC


	24. In the Tide

Note: Here is the next part… I know it's a little short but the next one will probably be longer. Thank you Tipperose, seeleysangel, missysammy, sohhkb, EugeniaVictoria, djeanne, xcaptialbarbie90, CapScarlett, PrincessAlica, tennisplayerx33, and xXxlilnoel09xXx. I hope you all enjoy!

Part 24

Rhett swore so suddenly that Scarlett was surprised. Turning her head, her eyes searched his. The eyes that were only filled with laughter and easiness before were now alert like a cat that was in danger.

"What is it, Rhett?"

"Get down into the belly of the boat, Scarlett," he quietly said, "and hold on. We're heading into a storm." At her look of horror, he said, "Don't be afraid, I've sailed through much worse."

She then saw the black sky and wondered numbly how the weather could change so quickly? Standing to her feet, struck dumb for a moment in astonishment. Her eyes wide and mouth open in fright, as darkness seemed to swamp them from each side.

"Scarlett!" His voice was urgent. Without objecting, she fell to her knees by the seat and held tightly onto a handle. The storm hit fiercely and she watched with wide eyes as Rhett made rapid adjustments to the rigging.

"We'll have to run before it!" he yelled. "You'll get wet but God it will be a ride!"

The cad sounded amused! Well when they got out of this mess she would strangle him and drown him herself! At that moment the squall hit. And the sky blackened almost completely. The heavens seemed to open and sheets of rain pelted down upon them She opened her mouth to cry for Rhett but the water filled her mouth and blinded her.

My God, I'm drowning was all she could think as she water continued to pour. She thought she would drown before she got Rhett. What would happen to all her money and children? No sooner had that thought registered; Rhett was on her mind. She looked up, trying to see him. But her hat collapsed against her face and she couldn't see. She yanked it off with one hand and furiously gripped the handle with the other so hard that she felt pain from her ring digging into her finger.

Then there was the awful noise of something breaking and rattling. The boat lunged and she fell forward, loosing her grip. The boat must have been standing on its nose by then and it was sinking!

My God, I don't want to die, not yet! But she was powerless as the boat cracked and she fell headlong into the freezing water, hanging onto the remnants as the storm tossed her. Her hair was in her face and she had never felt so cold. Scarlett opened her mouth to cry out for Rhett but the water choked her.

Then came the awful sound of the thick mast cracking. And she saw it for an instant before the water took it below. She couldn't see Rhett. Oh, God, he can't be dead! But she would know if he were. Though impossible, she dimly thought Rhett could control the sea! He wouldn't leave her even to death; he wouldn't... Then she was dragged under the surface of the water the petticoats pulling her down into darkness, the boat completely capsizing.

She suddenly realized what it felt like not to breath. It was frightening as the water flooded and pulled her down with its chilly grip. She clawed and kicked to survive as she was dragged down further and further. Then just as suddenly Rhett's arms were around her and he pulled her up to the surface. She was violently choking.

"Rhett! Rhett..." was the broken cry that emerged from her lips.

"Thank God," he breathed, still holding her, his face close to hers, his eyes burning and his face pale. "Listen to me, Scarlett."

The waves were roaring and getting bigger. She felt him shake her. The rain was hitting his face and hers as he leaned close to her.

"Scarlett! Listen to me as you have never listened before. We have to get under the hull or the waves will carry us down."

She numbly realized he wanted her to go down into the blackness on the water. But she couldn't, she wanted to scream and hold onto Rhett forever. Yet, even then a voice told her she had to do this. The reality of facing her fear in order to survive.

"Y-yes! W-what do I-do?"

"On the count of three hold your breath. I won't let you go, Scarlett! Do you trust me?"

She mutely nodded, her teeth chattering and heard him counting, all the while holding her breath. She closed her eyes tightly as Rhett pulled her under the surface and then they were under the boat, gulping the air with shuddering breaths. His hand was at her waist. Only then did she realize how pale he looked! She could barley hear him.

"Scarlett, I've got to leave you for a second. Don't panic. I need to cut the lines before the boat drags us down and...your petticoats too. Don't panic when you feel pressure on your legs. I won't be long."

He disappeared and it seemed like forever. She could barley feel anything. The only thought that comforted her was that she was alive and Rhett was with her and the fact that they had the slight shelter of the boat from the storm.

"Rhett, if we come through this, I'll never be mean to you again," she thought and nearly yelped as she felt pressure on her legs. It was Rhett and there was the odd feeling of her boots coming off. She wasn't paralyzed! Then the feel of being released from her petticoats as they fell away.

Only a moment later did Rhett's dark head emerge, gasping and pale. His face was close to hers and his eyes burning strangely. His big body shuddered.

"Rhett, w-what's wrong?"

"Nothing," he faintly said. He grabbed her arms and began to rub them fiercely. "Keep your circulation going." She saw him cringe.

"Rhett!" she shouted, her voice sounding faint. "What is it?"

"The mast hit my left leg when the boat capsized and it broke," he said, "Only a minor wound..."

But Scarlett knew it wasn't. Her eyes widened in panic as Rhett sagged, knowing the look well from her nursing during the war. The glazed eyes, pale face and faint voice. He was badly injured. And this time she couldn't cry on his shoulder or have him save her. She had to save them both and as God was her witness, she would!

"Rhett! You must stay awake, you must!" Grabbing onto his broad shoulders tightly. His hair was drenched and his eyes closed as his weight came upon her. She welcomed his weight and held onto him tightly, kicking her feet to stay afloat. But she could hardly breathe because of her damn corset!

"Where is you knife?" she demanded, her voice faint but still strong.

He slowly moved and handed it to her. She pried herself from his body and cut the front buttons then her corset laces. She held the knife with one hand for they might need it later and held onto Rhett with the other, holding the cleat of the boat with the tips of her numb fingers.

"Scarlett," he thickly muttered. "God, I don't get shot once in the war and now... Listen to me. Don't let me sleep because I might not wake back up. You must keep your courage. The tide-will pull us to shore...I won't leave you. You need every ounce of that damned stubbornness."

My God, she thought! It was as if he was saying a sermon. Rhett who was always so mocking was dead serious. She forced her legs to move; they felt so heavy. But she pushed her fear away with iron determination even as she hung onto him for life. He was in her arms but not as she had wanted him to be. For once in all the time she had known him, he was dependent on her. She chattered on, speaking to him of what she didn't know.

"Rhett, I won't disappoint you," she declared with blazing eyes, "I won't!" She could taste the tears and saltwater in her mouth as she stared at his pale face and eyes.

"I know, my pet." He lightly began to rub her arms. Eyes were bright as he continued to stare at her. "If I come through this, remind me to hang myself."

"Don't talk like that! You will survive! Oh, Rhett, you can't leave me, not now when I...I'll kill you if you go, I swear I will." She knew how absurd she sounded but she didn't care. Hot tears filled her eyes. She hated feeling helpless, she hated her fear and that she couldn't cry on his shoulders. Holding in her tears, as they were pushed by the waves toward the shore.

TBC


	25. Slipping Away

Note: I finally dragged myself online to post a new chapter  it's summer now so hopefully I will be able to write a whole lot more. And perhaps be inspired since my friend is going to Atlanta (And try to not be too jealous of him) Thanks once again, a million times over for the heartfelt reviews!

To: PrincessAlica, tennisplayerx33, xXxlilnoel09xXx, Thwarted Moony, SapphireIris, EugeniaVictoria, Tuduvant, Joyce LaKee, seeleysangel, djeanne, FancySara and CaptScarlett.

You all are amazing for sticking with me and this story.

Part 25

"At least we have the wine," Scarlett murmured hours later. Her voice sounded thick and far. Rhett was too quiet and her eyes widened; it had been a while since she had heard him speak. They were still under the hull of the boat and had been for what seemed like eternity.

"Rhett!" she harshly said, kicking at him and her nails digging into his arms. She knew he could hardly feel it. But a breath of relief, almost a cry emerged from her lips as his eyes opened, glazed but still very much alive. His breathing was jerky, or was that hers?

She cupped his face with one hand as she brought the bottle of wine to his mouth and poured some in his parted lips. She would give him the whole bottle if he needed it. For once, beside the night Sherman had come to Atlanta, she wasn't thinking of herself. Her eyes were on Rhett, narrowed and she wouldn't relent.

He sighed. "We'll be at shore soon, the tide isn't as strong."

She took a swig and coughed.

"We can't drink it all, Scarlett," he said.

Her eyes were staring into his; they were so close. His arms were about her and his head occasionally lulling against her shoulder as if he were a child, holding onto her with slackening arms.

"You mustn't sleep either," he added. "Sing me Old Kentucky Home."

Her voice echoed in the hull as she sang softly, beyond caring how she sounded, hardly knowing what she was doing... Rhett was listening and she saw he was fighting to remain awake. He was worried about her. She could see it in the grave lines of his face. A desire to tell him that she wanted him, loved him, needed him, and was sorry for all she had ever done came over her. But she mustn't give into hysteria.

Then she began to sing Peg in a low backed car. She thought of pa and the good old days. When it was warm and not so freezing. She would give anything to be at Tara. Drawing strength from the song but saw Rhett was becoming unresponsive and his strong arms were slackening.

"Rhett."

No response. She raised her hand and slapped him across the face with all the strength she had that his head hit the hull. His eyes instantly sprang to life and he glared, his eyes shooting fire but a slight smile came to his pale lips after a moment.

"I bet you enjoyed that," he said with a laugh.

Her eyes blazed. "I'll pay you back Rhett Butler for scaring me so!"

The wine had given her some warmth as she took one last sip. She coughed again and grimaced. "Sing for me, Rhett," she demanded, anything to keep him awake. "I always did like your voice..."

He sang and for a moment she forgot the cold or that they could die. She could pretend the cold wasn't gripping their bodies and that Rhett didn't look so pale. But his voice grew thicker and lowers as he stopped singing.

"Rhett!" She kicked at him and nearly went under the surface but despite his weakening body, he quickly caught her and brought her hard against his chest. Her face was on the crook of his neck, her arms wrapping around him. She couldn't smell the comforting scent of brandy and cigars on him. There was only smell frigid air all around her.

"So cold..." she murmured, sagging against him. Wanting to give up, she was tired of fighting, of the cold. Never had she felt so cold.

"Damn you for being a quitter, Scarlett," Rhett said, his voice sounding a little stronger. "I should have let Sherman get you."

Fire leapt to her eyes. "I'm not a quitter," she said between gritted teeth. "If you weren't hurt I would-"

"Scarlett! I feel a change in the current, I swear it. We're near shore. You can't give up. God, I feel like a newborn colt...Come on darling, kick me if you want, just don't leave me."

She glared at him. "Quit talking so! You'll loose your strength."

He nodded slowly. "Take a deep breath," he suddenly said and his hand clamped over her mouth and nose. He dove under the water with her struggling body. They surfaced outside the hull. She could see land!

"Almost there, my darling," he said. "Hold on."

He swam towards shore, holding her against his side. But his strokes slowed and he seemed to loose his stamina to fight against the waves. Scarlett held him tighter. She placed most of his weight on her and woodenly kicked her legs. Rhett was heavy and his body threatened to make her sink. But she wouldn't release him. Just how she made it to the shore, she would never know.

"That's it, my pet," he softly said. "You saved both our hides."

The last wave pushed them into the shallow water and another gust sent her and Rhett gasping and floundering on the wet sand. She still held him, her arms shaking from his weight. And she gasped when she realized how bad his wound was. There was a deep gash on his left leg and it began bleeding profusely.

"My God!"

She felt her stomach turn. She nearly retched but held in her bile. Now wasn't the time to be squeamish. She quickly placed her hands on his wound, pressing her hands against it. His legs were numb that he only slightly cringed. He was staring up at her and a ragged sigh came from his lips.

"The saltwater cleaned the wound out," he faintly said. "But you must bind up the wound and use some of the wine. We still have-it..."

She nodded but then her eyes widened. She had never been a good nurse. She knew hardly anything of binding wounds. What little she had known, she had pushed far from her mind. His blood was on her hands and she paled, her eyes meeting his.

"H-how do I bind it?"

"Tear a strip of your skirt off," he said.

She did and it ripped, none too easily, revealing her thigh. But she could no longer feel the cold wind as she placed pressure back on his leg. She reached into the knapsack and pulled out the bottle. Opening it with her teeth she poured some on the wound. Rhett showed no reaction on his face.

She knew the suggestive position she was in as she moved between Rhett's legs and lifted up his left one so that it was bent and easier for her to tie the material tightly around it, to stop the bleeding. He had seemed to loose so much that her heart dropped and she felt the tears rolling down her cheeks as she bound the wound tightly that he grimaced.

Scooting back, she moved to the other side of him, bringing the wine with her. Shirt clinging to his body and he was shivering. She could hear the chattering of his teeth. His eyes seemed feverish for an instant. She wanted to lie face down and cry but she forced herself to meet his gaze.

"Help will come... You must stay awake, Rhett."

"God-I can't remember being so damn helpless and cold," he murmured, his eyes closing for an instant and opened.

"You can't die!" she cried, grabbing his arm tightly and staring down at him with a look of horror and anger. "I won't let you!"

"I don't think I will leave this world so soon," he said with a laugh.

"How can you laugh?"

"It's either that or go into shock," he seriously said. His eyes met hers and they appeared dull. "Hold me, Scarlett," he whispered. "Just for awhile to keep us warm."

She lowered her body alongside his as his arms came around her. They were as close as they could possibly be. There still seemed heat and strength left in his body. She had wanted him to hold her but not like this. She sniveled and finally cried in gasping sobs.

He stroked her hair wearily. "You have been brave, my pet. God, I thought I had lost you. Don't cry, it's all over my courageous girl."

This made her cry all the more.

"Oh Rhett! I thought that you were dead. I couldn't bear it. To loose more people that I love. You can laugh at me all you want but I do!"

Rhett didn't reply but his hand continued to stroke her hair almost lazily. She didn't know how long they lay there in each other's arms. She heard him lightly speaking but it made no sense to her. It was lightly drizzling now and she knew what she had to do.

"I'll have to go get help," she numbly said after a moment.

He nodded and released her as she rose up to her knees beside him. She stared at him for the longest time, and bit her lip, shivering and wiping away her tears and the rain from her face.

"Yes," he said. "But first we must go to a cottage and start a fire to regain our strength. You are in no condition to scour the beach yet."

He drew himself up slowly and staggered a little. Scarlett was on her feet in an instant and was surprised that her legs didn't collapse beneath her. But she had no time to show weakness or give into the stinging pain of her flesh from the scrapes of rock and shells. She placed his arm over her shoulder and let him lean against her.

She staggered a little under his weight but regained her balance as they slowly made their way away from the shore. Rhett told her where to go and soon they were going through the thickets and far from any place she knew.

A cottage stood in front of them, solitarily. It looked inadequate to stand against the wind but she trusted Rhett's judgment. It had stood for generations and many a shipwreck survivor had seeked refuge in places such as this.

She pushed hard against the door with difficulty while supporting Rhett's weight. They stumbled inside.

"Take me to the chair," he said and she nodded as they made their way to the worn and faded chair. Rhett grimaced as he sat down and she looked at his leg. The bleeding had stopped but the fabric was soaked through with blood.

She forced herself to look around. There was a fireplace and rummaging around, she found wood sitting it in. Only after a few minutes with effort, the fire was lit. Then she turned back to Rhett.

"We have to get you out of your wet clothes." Walking to his seated form that was not erect but slouched and his head was bent. She kneeled in front of him, her hands moving to the buttons but his hand restrained her.

"I am capable of undressing," he said. "You must get out of those wet clothes too."

Her legs felt like jelly as she rose to her feet. Looking around she saw there was only one quilt. She grabbed it and spared a glance at Rhett undressing slowly. His whole body appeared cold and he was shivering. The fair light played across his perfect body and skin. Even with her muddled mind she felt her mouth go dry as she approached him and handed him the quilt.

She turned away to compose herself.

"Where do I go for help?"

"A couples miles north is Fort Moultrie," he said.

She lingered for an instant and took a deep breath. Somehow her shivering had ceased and her fear. Only the fear remained though for him. She had never seen Rhett look so worn, even after Bonnie had died, he had drunk like a fish but never had he looked so pale and hunched. There had been fire in him. And if she should return and he was dead...

Her green eyes searched his. In a swift instant she was across the room and knelt in front of him, grabbing him arm and forcing him to look at her.

"Promise me, Rhett Butler you won't give up. Promise me that you won't-" she let out a shaky breath, "die."

The fire played against his eyes. They were unreadable. But for an instant he raised his thumb to her cheek and lightly caressed it. He quickly pulled away his hand with a sigh.

"I promise," he gravely said, "But hurry, my pet. I'm as tired as hell and the wine isn't holding up..."

She rose to her feet, bereft, tired and cold. But she knew what she had to do. With one last glance she was out of the cabin and racing through the rain and away from the warm cottage and away from Rhett.

XXX

"Exhaustion," said the army doctor that Scarlett had brought back from Fort Moultrie, "and exposure. It's a miracle that your husband isn't dead, Mrs. Butler or yourself. His circulation is all but shut down from that wound and if we don't hurry gangrene might set in. Wrap the blankets around him and let's get him to the fort."

Scarlett spared a glance at Rhett, her heart in her eyes. She wanted to sob. She was near exhaustion and she had come back with the old goat of a doctor to find Rhett in a deep sleep.

She kneeled down, numbly, tears on her face as she swaddled Rhett with the blanket's careful to not let them fall away from his body. A large, beefy man stooped and picked up Rhett. Which would have been no easy task for Rhett's size. But the man picked him up and she began to follow him, until the doctor stopped her.

"Here now. Let the sergeant take him to the Fort. You are in no condition yourself."

"I am fine," she said stubbornly. "Where my husband goes, I am going too."

A cry almost escaped her lips, when she saw Rhett's eyes open for an instant and he seemed dazed. Then his eyes rolled back and the doctor closed the eyelids with his fingers.

"Better hurry," the doctor said, "He's slipping away…"

TBC


	26. Scarlett Takes Charge

Note: Thank you all once again!

**XXxlilnoel09xXx:** I'm glad you think there is plenty of drama since GWTW was full of it and I am trying my best to make this story entertaining.

**EugeniaVictoria: **It makes me so happy that you think this chapter was brilliant or rather the idea. I agree that I love it when Rhett is the helpless one, maybe it's because he always seems so in control. Not this time!

**seeleysangel: **Scarlett would not take kindly to Rhett dying, I agree. haha.

**Tennisplayerx33: **I'm so glad you loved it.

**PrincessAlica: **I'm delighted you thought it was a wonderful chapter 

**Djeanne: **It's always nice to hear that the reader is curious to read more… I'm on a thin rope and don't want to bore anyone  so thank you for reassuring me.

**FancySara: **Your reviews are always appreciated and I am glad you want to read more!

**Joyce LaKee: **I laughed at the "not Rhett" part of your review! I take it you like Rhett Butler as I do… lol. The writing will both be happy and not so happy. (By the way when will you update soon to your amazing story?)

**Missysammy: **No need to apologize for not reviewing more! I am always glad to get your reviews though and saying that you believed this was one of the best chapters I had written made me incredibly happy. Thank you!

Part 26

As soon as Rhett was brought back to the Butler's home, he settled on the bed, the house was in an uproar, packed with doctors and callers. Scarlett could only sit outside of the room they had inhabited as strangers, bereft and numb. Her eyes stared restlessly ahead as she waited for Eleanor, Rosemary and the doctor to emerge.

She couldn't even feel resentment at the thought of all the people around her, crying on and carrying on so. They didn't understand this numbness and the fear that shrouded her. She desperately wanted to see his face but the doctor had ordered she be put in the guest room for much needed sleep. If there was one thing she could do, it would be to yell that she didn't give a damn what they said.

Wade and Ella were stricken with fear. They had seen Rhett carried in from the carriage, his body almost lifeless. She had sent them to their room. Yet, she could see them watching from their bedroom door which was slightly ajar. Later she would comfort them, but not now when Rhett needed her. When she felt like she was going crazy from the wait.

The bedroom door opened and she nearly jumped in fright. Rising on shaky legs, the doctor saw her, a frown of displeasure crossing his face.

"I thought I ordered that you stay in bed, Mrs. Butler."

Knowing his tone all too well, her chin notched an inch. "How is my husband?" she asked coolly but inside she was trembling. Despite her bravado, tears began to course down her cheeks. Silence.

"Tell me!"

Her voice was almost hysterical when Rosemary and Eleanor emerged from Rhett's darkened room. They had tears on their faces and their eyes were worried as they came to rest on Scarlett and they rushed over to her, seeing her discomfort.

"Your husband's leg needs to be amputated, Mrs. Butler," the doctor was saying, " His condition has only worsened since last night. He is delirious and feverish-"

"Stop it!" she cut in harshly that everyone looked at her in alarm. "Are you telling me my husband might die, is that it?"

"Yes."

She felt her legs nearly buckle but some unseen force or strength made her stay still. Her eyes were suddenly dry, with no hint of tears that all onlookers were amazed at the sudden shift of her mood. It was as if Scarlett were waking from a frightening fog as she stared at the doctor with clear eyes.

"It's his leg or his life," the doctor repeated.

She thought of Rhett. How valuable his life was. But the thought of him without his leg was unbearable. He wouldn't be a whole man. He was a roamer; he couldn't be tied down without his leg. Just as she wouldn't be able to live without such a vital part of her body. Never to be able to dance or walk as she used to would be torture for her and she wouldn't let Rhett suffer. As long as there was breath in her body, she would fight what the doctor said. Surely he wouldn't lose his life or his leg. It couldn't be true!

Her eyes narrowed and her chin set. "You are discharged. My husband's leg will not be amputated. I will take over his care."

"Mrs. Butler, you are not qualified..."

Fire sparked to her eyes. "I nursed men during the war, doctor. I saw them blown up to bits. Bleeding and dying, until I couldn't stand it anymore. Don't you dare tell me I am not qualified!"

The doctor's face was red with outrage. "You'll be the death of your husband-"

"You heard what my daughter-in-law said," Eleanor cut in with firmness that both surprised Scarlett and the doctor. "You may leave."

The doctor muttered something as he marched down the stairs and Lucille scurried to show him out. As soon as the doctor disappeared, Scarlett placed her hand on her head and sank down on the chair. The Butler women flocked about her and their arms about her.

"You are so brave, my dearest," Eleanor said close to her ear. "Rhett will make it. We will call in the best physicians and with us all- he will be up in no time."

"I have to see him," she said. Her eyes met Rosemary and Eleanor's concerned ones. "Will you let me see him?"

"I don't know if that's a good idea," Rosemary began

.

"You need your rest," Eleanor soothed.

"I'll have plenty of rest when Rhett is better," Scarlett stubbornly said.

They nodded.

"Go to him."

Without the slightest hesitation, Scarlett rose to her feet. She felt a deep fear as she placed her shaking hand on the doorknob and slowly opened the door. Shutting it quietly behind her, she saw Rhett's darkened form. The room was almost completely dark, save for the two flickering gaslights. It reminded her of the glimpse she had of Rhett's room after Bonnie had died.

His face was dark. She felt her breath escape her lips and could taste the tears on her lips. Rhett seemed so vulnerable and she was used to the eternally sure and mocking Rhett. She was the one who was always sick and he was the one who saved her. Now he lie before her and a fear she had never known stole in over her.

"Oh, Rhett."

Her hand slowly touched his rugged cheek and smoothed his hair away from his broad forehead. A muttering of some sort sounded under his breath and he thrashed, causing her to withdraw her hand. His mutterings continued; she couldn't make sense of it. Finally, he quieted down.

She sank on the chair beside his bedside with a weary sigh. Taking his hand in hers, she lowered her face on the coverlet and allowed a few shuddering breaths from her lips. His hand hadn't moved in hers.

"I love you," she whispered, looking at his unconscious form. "You can't die for then nothing else matters. Not even Tara, money or life." She brought his hand to her lips and kissed it lingeringly. Rising to her feet, she spared him one last glance before going to the door and opening it.

She emerged from the dark room, spent and her heart feeling as if it weren't beating in her chest. To the left of her, she saw Prissy whining and simpering. Was it only that girl came in moment of crisis to whine?

"Miss Scarlett, oh Miss Scarlett what will we do?" Prissy cried hysterically.

Dimly she remembered someone once asking her the same thing. Looking upon her for all the answers. It had been at Tara… Once again she had to tote the weary load, a load she would gladly take. Anything could be borne as long as Rhett survived and he would, she would see to it.

"Quit crying," she stiffly ordered. "We have enough going on without you carrying on so…"

Her eyes left Prissy and went to Eleanor and Rosemary's anxious ones. The women had been standing there the whole time and she now faced them with a calm look, though Scarlett could have sworn it felt as if her heart was breaking and she was deathly afraid. Never would she admit it though. Thus she met their eyes directly.

"I want the best physicians in Charleston called. At least two of the best. I will nurse Rhett and someone is to be with him at all times."

With their nods and Rosemary running to do her bidding. She saw Wade and Ella hiding in the hall, unnoticed. She was so very tired, she didn't feel like speaking with them but she motioned for them to draw near to her.

"Mother Uncle Rhett is not-" Wade began.

She shook her head. "No Wade. But he is very sick. I need you to be brave and watch Ella for me... Will you do that?"

He nodded. In other times she wouldn't have done so, but she smoothed back Wade's hair almost unconsciously. Letting out a deep sigh, she looked at Ella. Ella's lips were trembling.

"I don't want Uncle Rhett to die like Aunt Melly!"

Rhett's words came back to haunt Scarlett. That she wasn't a good mother, somehow inadequate. She was so damned tired but she woodenly took Ella in her arms and soothed her, while feeling a pang deep in her own chest.

It threatened to burst. She wanted Mammy. She wanted Rhett and Melanie. It seemed as if fate was always working against her to take those away from her that she loved the most. Well, fate wouldn't take Rhett from her. Turning her head, Ella still in her arms, she looked over at Wade.

"Wade, please take Ella to Aunt Eualie's and stay with her. I'll come for you both later." And on a second thought she added, "Prissy will go with you."

At least she would get Prissy out of her hair. She couldn't have the children running around like scared goats and getting in the way. Wade nodded and she patted him on the cheek, making her way towards the French doors like a sleepwalker.

She breathed in the cool air in her lungs. Her heart cried out for Rhett. Feeling as if she would die if he didn't survive. She came to stand beside the lounging chair and held onto the arms so tightly that her wedding band dug into her finger. Exhaustion threatened to conquer her, and shock. But she wouldn't be licked; she released the arm of the chair and made her way back inside, shoulders squared.

TBC


	27. Scarlett's Decision

Note and Question: Well I am dragging a long with this story still. But am a little discouraged and not very satisfied with the outcome of the characters. I feel like I am not having Scarlett and Rhett remain true to their characters. It is very difficult since their roles are reversed. So if anyone could help me and honestly tell me if Scarlett and Rhett are believable enough, I would so appreciate it!

Thank you SkyBlueSw, FancySara, EugeniaVictoria, PrincessAlica, Joyce LaKee, seeleysangel, xXxlilnoel09xXx, Musical Harmony and CaptScarlett. Here is the next part and I hope you all enjoy.

Part 27

Rhett tossed fitfully as he slept. He heard fragments of his mother and Rosemary's conversations. He thrashed and pushed off his coverlets. But opening his eyes he saw the dim flickering lights and Scarlett standing over him.

She was placing a cool rag on his forehead. He felt hot and the water soothed him for a moment. The thought of death was welcoming. It had been welcomed since Bonnie's death. Even the sight of Scarlett and the knowledge she was alive didn't help his disjoined, chaotic fragments of dreams.

There was his father beating him as a child. The feel of a slaves whip against his back and the memory of running away. There was the feeling of keen starvation and seeing Ross chase after him, calling for him to come back. And Scarlett evaded him as a dream. Wearing her green dress and her eyes dancing. He could hear her laughter swirl in his mind, beckoning him and holding him prisoner. And then the feel of his arms around her, kissing her and telling her that he loved her.

Her voice faded and then there was war, sprawling in front of him. The heavy feel of the artillery and the sight of men dying. Blood was all over and the sound of soldiers singing rang in his ears. Always, Scarlett came back to him but then she was replaced with Bonnie, his sweet Bonnie.

He licked his dry lips as the voices hushed. He saw Scarlett still standing over him, her brow creased with worry and her face pale in the dim light. Closing his eyes, it was Bonnie wanting her daddy.

"Don't worry my Bonnie," he murmured hoarsely. "It's all right, daddy is here." He opened his eyes looking around the room and saw the lights were flickering for Bonnie. Then the image came of her on her pony. He saw her fall and heard her cries and the splintering of wood. He called for her name hoarsely. "Bonnie, wake up. Open your eyes for daddy. Bonnie, God!"

"He's having a nightmare," Eleanor whispered beside Scarlett.

Scarlett stood, choking on her tears, too tired. She soothed Rhett's feverish face again, his luminous eyes staring at her until he began to mutter again about Bonnie.

Rhett watched Scarlett a moment longer. Before he fell back to sleep of dreams of Scarlett haunting him and Bonnie. When he opened his eyes again, hours later, Scarlett was gone.

"Scarlett," he whispered.

Lucille was beside him and moved towards the bed, her face shadowed.

"Did you want Miss Scarlett?"

He wanted her, like a man starving. Wanting to grasp her against him and stare into her emerald eyes to know he was alive. But he couldn't be under her spell again. But God, he wanted her. Just to see her and feel her hand in his.

"No," he hoarsely muttered. "I must purge her from my blood…"

The darkness claimed him again. In his dreams there was Scarlett. She was calling for him and telling him that she loved him.

XXX

The days melted into weeks. Scarlett stood steadfastly by Rhett's side. The children were to stay at Aunt Eualie's and everyone: the physicians, maids and the Butler women staid to take turns caring for Rhett.

By the end of the first week, Scarlett was frantic. Her temper was short, her face drawn and pale. Dark circles were under her eyes. She didn't leave his side for but a moment. She barley ate anything and her sleep was only in minutes at a time beside Rhett. During that time, people stayed clear from her…

One particular day, she was surprised to walk out of Rhett's room and see Ross Butler in the hall. He looked drunk and she felt a hot anger stab her. He couldn't even be sober to see his own brother! The doctor said Rhett was near death but she wouldn't and couldn't believe the pompous old Dr. Garrett. The hall was empty save Ross and her. She wanted to flee but made herself cordially greet him.

"Hello Ross," she stiffly greeted, "I am surprised to see you."

"I have no other choice," he slurred. "My brother is near death after all."

"He is better," she said, hoping her voice sounded convincing. But Rhett was getting worst. No wonder that someone would call the drunken Ross from Dunmore. She wondered if it had been Rosemary or Eleanor.

"So," he suddenly began with a mocking smile. "My brother is near death and you begin to care. I suppose you'll inherit his millions and make out well enough. I know he doesn't want you, he told me so."

A rage so explosive built up in her and a sharp pain but the rage dulled it. She couldn't control her next actions as a cry escaped her mouth and she slapped him across his face with all her strength. He seemed as surprised as her and stumbled back from the force. The sound echoed throughout the empty hallway and Rhett's door opened, Rosemary and Eleanor stumbling out to witness the sight. She ignored their voices.

"Don't you dare ever say that again!" she raged, eyes flashing. "I am not some gold digger. I love Rhett but of course a drunken fool like you couldn't understand about love. Get out of my sight and stay the hell away from me."

She turned on her heel and stomped to the guest room, slamming the door behind her. She hated Ross Butler! She hated him more then she had hated anyone in her entire life. How dare he say that she only wanted Rhett's money. Once that would have been true but now when for the first time her feelings were genuine, he made light of them and insulted her when Rhett lay in the other room near death.

She could hear Eleanor reprimanding Ross and questioning him. She staid in the room, long enough for her breathing to slow down and her rage to cool. Not long later, she emerged to find the hallway empty and Ross nowhere in sight, he must have been a lot smarter then she had thought.

Dr. Garrett couldn't have known how near the breaking point Scarlett was by that evening after her rage at Ross Butler. He suggested that they make Rhett bleed to get the toxins out of his body. That was a grave mistake and she raged, advancing on him and screaming at the top of her lungs.

"You get out of this house. Bleed my husband and I'll murder you! Would you bleed him to kill him you low down scum of a physician. I can care for my husband with my hands tied behind my back better then you could, you impotent fool. Get out!"

The doctor didn't move and Scarlett was ready to forcefully throw herself at him to make him leave. When Ross appeared, giving the appearance of being more sober then she had ever seen him. Ross was staring at the doctor with the same cool rage Rhett possessed.

"I believe you heard my sister-in-law, get out before I throw you out."

She was surprised by Ross' sudden move of defending her and siding with her. She searched his face for any ulterior motive but saw none as the doctor fled. She felt tears run down her cheeks to her mortification. When Ross handed her his handkerchief, it reminded her of Rhett that it brought on fresh tears.

"You and your brother are a lot alike," she explained. Then laughed tearfully. "He always gives me his handkerchief when I become a crying jag."

"So I've been told," he said, but his voice was kind and there was no hint of mocking.

"Why did you help me?" she weakly asked after a moment. Her body was still shaking from exhaustion and stress. She was utterly spent.

"In a way to make amends," he said, surprising her further. His voice was earnest as he continued, "I figure you must really love my brother is you would stay married to him this long. And about me saying he didn't want you, well I was lying. It's plain to me he does. Any man would want you…"

Her eyes met his and she saw his eyes sweep her body in the same way Rhett's eyes had done countless times.

"Are you flirting with me Ross Butler?" she asked, the first hint of a smile in her voice for weeks.

He laughed. "I am but don't tell my brother, he'd have my hide. Well, I better head back to my room." He began to walk past her. She called out his name and he turned.

"Thank you, Ross."

He bowed and walked away. She wondered if Rhett knew how much him and his brother were alike. Still clutching the handkerchief she made her way to Rhett's door and pausing she opened the door and slipped quietly in.

He was still lying on the bed. The lights were the same and not much had changed. He was quieter though because of the laudanum laced milk she had given him earlier with the doctor. Changing the bandage on his leg she saw to her relief that there was no sign of infection setting in.

After she was finished, she sat at his bedside she told him of her near attacking the doctor and Ross helping her. She talked about everything, not knowing if he could hear but she did anyway. Holding his hand she felt somehow closer to him.

"I love you, Rhett," she finally said, knowing he couldn't hear her but knowing she could say it freely without him laughing at her or running off.

XXX

Despite her stress and fear, Scarlett stood firm, even in the moments that she would start shaking from exhaustion, even when Rhett appeared to get worst. Even when no one else seemed to understand the reality of his sickness, acting as if they knew how she felt.

"You've done all you can do, Mrs. Butler," Dr. Smith told her in the hall way after an examination. Dozens of examinations had been done over the past few weeks. She could only stare at him uncomprehendingly. Rhett still needed her!

"But," she protested stubbornly, "He needs me."

He smiled kindly. "Let me take over now. You look near exhaustion yourself."

She could only nod as she sat at her usual spot in the hallway. The grandfather clock chimed. It was two o'clock. Time seemed to blend together. She waited for Eleanor to emerge from the room and when she did, Scarlett quickly rose to her feet.

"How is he?" she haltingly asked. Her eyes searched Eleanor's face for she would know if she was lying. Eleanor wavered and she sighed.

"I won't lie to you my dear. His leg won't need to be amputated but he is getting slightly worst. But you know that saying once someone gets worst only then do they get better?"

She stared at Eleanor with dull eyes. Eyes that was haunted, pale and left with little hope. Scarlett knew Eleanor was only trying to not tell her the worst. She could read it in her drawn mouth and sad dark eyes. They were Rhett's eyes but the only difference was they were soft and she could read them. She had never been able to read Rhett.

"Has he called for me?" she wearily asked. She had waited so long for him to call her. She grasped for some sign that he still cared. But she saw Eleanor's eyes lower.

"He hasn't called for anyone darling. He is delirious."

But Scarlett knew that he could have called for her. After her fall and miscarriage she had known that she had wanted him. She remembered calling for him. He could call for Bonnie and not her! She knew the unfairness of her being jealous of her daughter that was dead. But Rhett had always been kinder and more loving to Bonnie then her, even now.

If only he had been kinder to her as he had been to Bonnie. Loved her as much as he had loved Bonnie. Even now Bonnie had more of a hold over Rhett's heart then she had. She thought of Bonnie and all the pain came back on her. What if Rhett died? She knew he probably would be happy to do so and get rid of her. Maybe Ross had been right and he didn't want her. But even now with his fever gone, he didn't want her... She swallowed.

Placing her hands on her face, eyes dry but exhaustion evident in the lines on her face. Damn him. He spurned her love, rejected her and didn't give a damn as he had said. She wished she had been the sick one then he would have been sorry.

"Darling, Rhett will be fine, he will..." Eleanor embraced her but she didn't cry, she couldn't. She sagged against Eleanor and let her soothe her as one would soothe a hurt and wounded child. But her heart couldn't be soothed and she couldn't pretend that her foolish hopes and dreams could come true. She had fought for three long months for Rhett, and now she had been shot down. A tide of bitterness rose up within her.

"I-no he won't call for me," she frantically said, hysteria rising from lack of sleep and anger. "He doesn't want me. I was a fool to believe that he did care but he has proven that his feelings are-" she stopped suddenly, her eyes meeting Eleanor's.

She rose to her feet slowly. "I am going to get some fresh air," she tiredly said, leaning against the wall for support. "Rhett doesn't need me any longer…" She slowly turned away, her shoulders hunched as she made her way down the stairs and towards the French doors.

Breathing in the cold air into her constricted lungs once outside, she wanted to see the children. It was odd for she had never wanted to see any of her children desperately. Of course she had missed Bonnie terribly when Rhett took her away to London. But this was the need to just be with her children. Despite the fact that Ella's constant whining bothered her and Wade's timidity annoyed her, she missed them.

They loved her for herself. She didn't have to fight for their love, earn or give them things constantly. They reminded her so much of Melanie that being with them was like being with Melanie all over again. Later, after some rest she would go and see them...

She heard the doors open and turning her head she saw Ross had come out. Oh, can't they all just leave me alone, she thought. She wanted to lick her wounds, to cry at the unfairness that Rhett didn't call for her or want her. But it wasn't to be.

"Hello," he greeted, his eyes searching hers in that irritating way Rhett's did. She hoped he couldn't see that his presence wasn't welcomed. But he did. "Would you rather I left you alone?"

She thought of saying yes, but couldn't be so rude. Seeing he had a brandy decanter in his hands and her eyes must have shown she wanted it. Once she shook her head, he wordlessly handed her a cup and the decanter.

"Looks like you need a drink."

Before this time, she hadn't touched it, wanting to be strong for Rhett and clear-headed. Now she grabbed it frantically and opened it up. Her hands were shaking so badly that the contents sloshed over the cup and she drank the liquid greedily and it burned her throat.

The glass slipped from her hand and shattered. She stared at it numbly for a moment before she felt the tears well in her eyes; she turned away. Feeling utterly bitter, angry and hurt. Also mortified that this was the second time that Rhett's brother had witnessed her in this condition. She stooped to pick up the pieces.

"I'm sorry. I have never been this clumsy." Her hands were shaking.

"Leave it," he said. "Lucille can pick it up later." He held out his hand to help her up and she took it gratefully.

Looking at Ross Butler, she realized this was the second time he had helped her. Despite her dislike and uneasiness at Dunmore around him, she felt that he wasn't as bad as people said. As people had called Rhett a scalawag and no good, they had been wrong. She was certain they were wrong about Ross.

"I believe all Butler men are gallant to rescue a damsel in distress," she lightly quipped after such a dire time of Rhett's sickness and her displays of anger and sadness. Moving away, she held onto the verandah railing and looked out into the small but well manicured yard.

He took a place next to her and no more words were said. She thought about Rhett with a pang in her heart. Suddenly with clarity she knew he didn't want her and it was unbearable to stay in Charleston now. She wouldn't be the fool again, mooning over a man that didn't want her. Still she had pride left even if it was wounded pride. She was still Scarlett O'Hara and she thought of her father's words all those years ago, "Would you be chasing after a man that didn't want you?"

Gerald had said that about Ashley but she saw that she would fall into the same mistake with Rhett. It would be useless to waste her life another moment, for looking back she saw how much of a waste it had been. She had been wounded, humiliated and rejected enough by Rhett Butler. As soon as he was out of bed, she would leave with the children and go home.

TBC


	28. Recovery

Note: Thank you all so much fro the reviews and support. Sometimes I feel like I am done with this story and other times, I am just pushing forward to finish it.

Thank you Raicheal, Joyce LaKee, xXxlilnoel09xXx, Sohhkb, EugeniaVictoria, missysammy, seeleysangel, CapScarlett, Lady M. Blackeney and Gina C M. The reviews mean so much to me. Here is the next part and please enjoy.

Part 28

It was hovering faces that Rhett was greeted with. He blinked against the harsh noon light as he became conscious of his surroundings. His body felt like hell was his first conscious thought before his eyes saw those around him. He saw Rosemary and his mother, their faces creased with worry.

"He's awake," Eleanor breathed. "Go tell Dr. Smith."

He saw his sister quickly rush out of the room, her skirts flying around her ankles in her haste. Then Eleanor was holding his hand as if she were afraid sleep would claim him again. He didn't know what time it was but he could grasp what had happened. Then he thought of Scarlett. He remembered the boat and the fear in her eyes.

"Scarlett?" he whispered between chapped lips. His tongue felt thick as if he couldn't speak the words coherently.

"What is it darling?" Eleanor asked. straining forward as the doctor came in followed by Rosemary. He saw the doctor was lighting the gaslights for better light in the dim room and Rosemary was watching him with an anxious face. He wondered why the children weren't around and the more burning thought came to his mind. Where was Scarlett?

"Where is Scarlett?" he asked, his voice sounding stronger.

"Your fever broke earlier," she explained as the doctor moved around their conversation, pulling out his stereoscope to check Rhett's heartbeat.

"Yes," he urged, wishing the doctor would get out of the line of his vision.

"Well, the poor dear has hardly left your side for a month now. She saw that you were taken care of personally. Finally the strain was to much and she fell into an exhausted sleep in the guest room."

Rhett was shocked. The fact that he had been sick so long and that Scarlett hadn't left his side. He knew she could never stand sickness and she wasn't the most selfless person. But she had nursed him back to health and what sounded was to the point of exhaustion.

"How are you feeling Mr. Butler?" the doctor asked.

Rhett took a good look at him. He was a young chap but seemed sincere enough. He wondered what had happened to old Dr. Garret.

"Fine, fine," Rhett said, a bit too impatiently. "And the children?"

"They have just returned from Eulaie's. Scarlett thought it would be best if they staid there until you were well. She didn't want them frightened."

Another selfless act on Scarlett's part that surprised him. He saw Rosemary with tears in her eyes. Had he really been that sick? Looking at the doctor, his suspicions were confirmed by the look with which the doctor was looking at him.

"How sick was I doctor-" he gave him a helpless look, not knowing his name.

"Smith," he supplied. "Very sick, to the point of death. The injury on your leg sent poison through your body and you had a fever... a very bad one. Hallucinations and we could barely feed you enough. Your wife was very helpful and from what I heard your leg was about to be amputated."

Rhett cringed at that thought. Not having his leg would have been worst then dying. Men were useless without legs. He had seen that enough in the war when his fellow men's legs had been blown up or sawed off. There was a crippling affect of not having ones legs and arms.

"But your wife flatly refused," continued the doctor. "Mrs. Butler is a courageous woman and an asset to the medical field. She knew many things from her days of nursing that saved your life, Mr. Butler and your leg."

It wasn't often that Rhett was speechless but he was.

"Thank you doctor."

"You're welcome. You aren't the most agreeable patient but I've had worst." There was a slight laugh on everyone's part. "I'll be by tomorrow to check on you. You are in the clear but do not over exert yourself so soon and I prescribe further bed rest for at least a week."

Doctor Smith turned, his bag in hand and Eleanor left to show him out. He could hear their voices drift down the hall. Rosemary stood in front of him, tears still in her eyes as she watched him wordlessly.

"Oh Rhett," she finally choked, falling beside him. "I was so scared. I thought you would die especially when mama sent for Ross."

"She did?" he gently asked, stroking his sister's back. She was beside herself and sobbing as she had when she was a little girl.

She nodded. "But Scarlett was so brave. She does have the most fearsome temper but it saved you. She truly does love you."

It was as if fate were laughing at him. He didn't know if he would have welcomed death. But he hadn't died and was pulled back by the very woman who he scorned. He had scorned her love and had done little to make her feel welcome in Charleston. He hadn't been viscous but nor had he been kind to her. Now even his own sister echoed Scarlett's haunting words to him.

He felt concerned for her. He knew Scarlett was strong but from what he had heard, she had been to hell and back on his account. The most overwhelming desire to see her came over him. Through his sickness he could remember the overwhelming urge to call her, wantung her and Bonnie. He remembered that much. Looking at Rosemary, she was poised over the bed, ready to help him in any way.

"I need to see Scarlett," he said, "To make sure she is okay."

"But Rhett, I don't think that is a good idea so soon after your sickness. Doctor Smith and mama would have my head."

"I know," he gravely said, but a hint of a smile came to his face, the same mocking one that assured Rosemary that her brother was well.

"But love awaits no man," he quipped. He wouldn't pretend his feeling for Scarlett had never been closed. Over these past few years, he had weaned himself off of her pull on him. It had taken years but he had done so. He wasn't ready to open old wounds and to start over. But more then anything, this desire to see Scarlett was strong.

It surprised him. Ever since after her fall a few years prior and her miscarriage he had wanted to see her badly. But after that, and the last two deteriorating years of their marriage, he could have cared less what she did or where she went. His attention had been lavished on Bonnie and the children. That had been enough and his dream of Scarlett had only become a faded desire of the past.

Now he had to see her. His eyes met Rosemary's questioningly. She wavered but she helped him up. Only then did he realize how weak he was, as weak as a newborn colt. And he was conscious of his unkempt appearance. Looking at the mirror only confirmed his suspicions. He had dark stubble that was turning into a beard; his face was pale and gaunt. Even worst was the odor of not bathing for a month that reached his nose. He had smelt better even when he had been in the horse jail years ago.

"Could you call Lucille to draw a bath?" he asked. "I can't see Scarlett like this."

Rosemary smiled and left the room to do his bidding and he sat back down heavily on the bed. Looking around the room he saw rags, bandages and food untouched. It was a mess in here and by the looks of it; Scarlett's things had been moved into the guest room. For her brush was gone, her empty bags and her shawl that she always paced near her in case of a chill.

The bandages brought back the memory of his wound from the broken mast. It had hurt like hell but he had tried to push aside the pain for Scarlett. Much help he had been though for she had saved him and he had helped her very little. He felt slightly embarrassed for he had always been the one to help her out of trouble. Having taken her out of Atlanta when Sherman had marched through, married her and had given her anything she had needed.

Now he was indebt to her. He had been used to Scarlett so long asking him for things and looking up at him expectantly. Now he couldn't help but think the roles were reversed. Whereas he had loved Scarlett, she claimed to love him. Where he had once been her rescuer, now she had rescued him from death.

Rhett grew more impatient by the minute. But Lucille did arrive, with a grin on her face.

"Praise the Lord you are with us, Mistha Rhett," she said with a broad grin. "I heard you want to look presentable for Miss Scarlett."

He chuckled. He had always made sure his appearance was perfect around Scarlett. During the war with men in tattered clothing and Scarlett being surrounded by them, he had always wanted to stick out in her mind. Many times he had seen admiration in her eyes at his appearance but her mind had been so stuck on Ashley Wilkes, she would merely give him a glance.

The water was drawn and as the maids shuffled out. Rhett shut the door behind them and began to shed his clothing. Lowering himself into the water, he sighed and his body relaxed. Seeing his leg made him cringe. Gangrene hadn't set in luckily but a deep black bruise and yellow color colored around the wound.

He vigorously cleaned his body, trying to get every inch of sickness and filth off his body. It felt damn good to be clean again. Leaning his head against the tub, he let his eyes drift to the window. It was dark outside, the clouds covering the sun and it definitely wasn't as humid as it got during the summer.

After a time when his tense muscles had relaxed, he rose up out of the water, dried himself and began the process of dressing. Looking in the mirror he saw he was still unshaven and grinned at his appearance. Running his fingers through his damp hair he seemed to laugh at himself

"You sure looked a lot better during the war."

He lathered his face and began to shave.

XXX

Ten minutes later, Rhett snuck into the hall, knowing Rosemary was keeping their mother busy. The halls were still and he tried to make his heavy steps lighter as he made his way down the hall on his bare feet. He cringed slightly, for his leg still hurt like hell. But he took the pain as he came to the guest room.

Pausing in front of the door, he wondered how Scarlett would react to seeing him. It was odd that he no longer had to hide behind his mocking facade. He could see she was even more open with him and the thought of seeing her was frankly terrifying. For once things weren't between them and he didn't know what to expect.

Knocking lightly, he didn't hear movement within the room or her voice. Thus he grabbed the doorknob and quietly pushed open the door. He was greeted with the sight of Scarlett lying across the bed. She seemed very small compared to the massive four-poster bed and the dozens of pillows around her. Advancing further in, he shut the door behind him.

The window was open and wind blew gently against her face. She seemed peaceful, no harsh lines on her face but it was relaxed in a way he had rarely observed. Usually her eyes were narrowed or her face would change so drastically. It had been one of the things he loved most about her, her expressions. They could range just as quickly from sweet to scorn.

He shut the window and expected her to wake up by the noise. But she merely threw her arm upward so that her hand was resting on her forehead. Her brows furrowed. Even in her sleep, he could see she looked much paler and thinner then he had ever seen. His heart twisted at the sight of the toll life had taken on her. Whereas he had the affects of alcohol, she had the affects of life; of lack of sleep, food and a disregard for her well-being.

A strand of hair gently lifted by the wind across her face to her nose. After a moment her nose twitched. He smiled as he moved the wisp away, his finger moving across her soft skin. Her eyes fluttered open and she stared at him drowsily, as if he were a dream.

"Hello," he greeted.

"Hello," she echoed, her voice thick with sleep as she sat up. Her mourning gown was rumpled, as was her hair. He couldn't help but smile.

Her eyes roved across him openly although she seemed disoriented. "I see you have recovered well."

"Quite, Mrs. Butler. I owe my gratitude to a former Confederate army nurse. Perhaps you know her?" he joked but his eyes bore into hers. "You saved my life. I am curious as to know why."

He waited for her reply. She was debating on what to tell him. This was a side of Scarlett he had never seen. She was thinking before she spoke and the fact that she seemed to care for his welfare was sobering.

Eyes lowering, he saw dozens of emotions flitter across her face. He wished he could have seen her eyes. Her expression became neutral then her eyes met his squarely. "You know why."

He knew she was saying that she cared. He didn't want her love, at least her infatuated love. But he had to admit that he felt touched. The only people in the world that had cared for him beside Mama and Rosemary had been Bonnie. Now Scarlett offered him the love that she had withheld and that had died with Bonnie. That had been the cruelest blow life had ever dealt him and he had told Scarlett he wouldn't risk his heart again.

"Scarlett, I've been thinking we should have a real truce. I'm not admitting my undying love," he quickly added. "But I would like peace between us."

He saw her face visibly drop and smile fade. The hope diminished from her eyes. But she quickly pasted a weak smile on her face. "Well then you wouldn't object to lying down. You look ready to fall over and I am certainly tired."

Rhett wavered for a moment but there was no harm in sleeping beside Scarlett. He sat on the edge of the bed and lifted his long legs, stretching out and turning over until they were face to face.

He didn't know what possessed him. Only mere inches were between them and he closed the distance. He lightly brushed his lips against hers and felt her body stiffen for an instant before she settled against him. The kiss was over soon and he pulled back, his eyes serious to her searching stare.

"What was that for?"

"Thank you."

"I should thank you," she said after a moment of silence.

"For what?" he asked, his brows rising in question. His head rested on his arm as he stared at her.

"For not leaving me a widow. I do believe three times would be too much in a lifetime."

He laughed. The first time he had laughed in a long time. His arms moved around her, he drew her nearer to him instinctively. She had a grin on her face as she rested her head against his chest. The feel of her cheek resting against his chest was oddly comforting. Rhett was content in simply holding Scarlett. Stroking her hair lazily, he realized with surprise that he hadn't felt this peaceful in ages. Even though his body was weak and he had been near death, somehow the five-year storm had passed.

TBC


	29. Constant Reminders

Note: Well, I'm back. Being dragged back from my laziness and uncertainty of posting a new chapter. This one is a rather long one and I hope I didn't drag it out too much. Here is a long overdue thanks to djeanne, Caiti Scarlett, seeleaysangel, xXxlilnoel09xXx, PrincessAlica, Lady M. Blackeney, oldsoul01, Tuduvant, EugeniaVictoria, missysammy, alex67400, FancySara, tennisplayerx33, Joyce LaKee and Kelly Melly.

Part 29

"I saved you," Scarlett reminded Rhett with an arch of her brow. "You owe me."

She took pleasure in reminding him just how much he owed her. True, she had somehow persuaded him to come outside with her… just so she could knit. That wasn't the true reason but the fact she enjoyed his company and took pleasure in people that walked down the Battery seeing them. Often they were complimented and the women were pea green with envy that she was the one married to Rhett.

"I saved you a great many times," Rhett reminded her with one of his famous grins. "I would say you were simply repaying the debt."

Before she could reply, he opened the front door and she went out. He followed her and sat down. She began knitting with a vengeance as Rhett pulled out a cigar.

"You know there is a great many other entertaining things we could be doing," he pointed out.

Shooting him a look, she tossed her head. "Like what? Perhaps calling on old biddies or taking a stroll?"

Laughing, he didn't say anything else as he began to smoke and they fell into a comfortable silence. Scarlett began to think and many would say it was a bad thing. Truly she didn't want to stay in Charleston another moment. She loved being near Rhett, Eleanor and Rosemary. But one could only take so much. This had to be the most boring place she had ever been. She had thought so all those years ago too.

Taking her eyes off of her work, she observed Rhett sitting beside her in a chair. His body was in a relaxed position, legs crossed. Then his eyes met hers if he sensed she was appraising him, an easy grin flitted on his face. He looked wonderful despite the fact that he had been near death. No one had been able to keep him in bed and he taken up his usual routine. Really a man shouldn't look that wonderful, Scarlett thought.

He wore gray trousers with a black waistcoat. His necktie was wide, a navy blue color and he wore his usual watch that she hadn't seen for much time. Drawing her mind from his appearance, she sighed and threw down her knitting. It was an awful attempt.

"I can't do this anymore!" she cried. "I will go mad. How on earth do women knit all the time without going utterly mad?"

He chuckled. "Cheer up, you have made good progress."

They both knew that was a lie. Her stitches were awful. She had begun with ten and somehow had fifteen now. The scarf for Wade wasn't working out.

"Fiddle-dee-dee," she said. "I'd like to see you knit Rhett Butler."

He screwed up his face in mock disgust. "Thanks but no. I would much rather be…"

"Oh, I know where you would rather be," she teasingly interrupted. "Perhaps at a saloon or gambling. Nothing you want to do surprises me. I just don't know how you don't go insane with all these parties and calls."

He shrugged. "I got good practice in Atlanta."

It was a touchy subject. Both avoided talking about Atlanta or their past so she kept quite though she was dying to ask him what he meant. But he changed the subject.

"Scarlett, have you heard the latest talk?"

. "No, but you will tell me anyway."

"You little hypocrite. You don't want to look too excited but we both know you are dying to find out. Well, I shall tell you. It is said you are a woman of admirable exploits."

"So what is this about me being admirable?" she asked, interested.

"I was with Wade and Ella Christmas shopping-"

"Oh Rhett really? Did you get me something?"

He looked amused. "Try to control yourself while I finish my story."

Rhett told her that two women had come up to him and had raved about her courage. They had promised to call on her. She had thought it would be far more interesting then that and her face showed her disappointment.

"Oh is that all? It's not as if the governor was coming to call on me or the pope for that matter."

"If you must know, Mrs. Butler, every where I went, I was stopped as people raved about your courage and your virtue. We are the most talked about couple in Charleston I daresay. They couldn't help but wonder how a woman could so selflessly save a scalawag like me and how a woman of your virtue could be in 'love' with her black sheep husband."

Scarlett watched him with a guarded look. If he thought she would say she loved him again, he was sadly mistaken. She wouldn't tell him again so that he could reject her love. Indeed, she would have left Charleston after his recovery if not for the sudden change in their relationship.

Not that Rhett had admitted he was madly in love with her. But after the day he had asked for a truce, their relationship had become more caring somehow. It was a peace she had never felt with him. Yes, she was frustrated at times that she wanted his love but forced herself to take what was offered. No longer was he as guarded or aloof around her. Indeed, it was as if she had went back in time to the early days during the war when he had been there to talk to and someone to laugh with. She wanted more, but she knew with time he would see that he loved her. Scarlett was trying to be patient, but sadly that was one virtue she didn't posses.

She jumped in surprise at hearing his voice and she saw the he was watching her expectantly.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"You have become scatter brained lately," he joked.

Hot words flew to her lips so quickly that the emotion surprised her. She was used to Rhett unmercifully saying hateful things about her. Hadn't he always, from the first moment she had met him? The defense mechanism rose up within her, one she had always fallen back on.

"If you're just going to be unpleasant today, I'll kindly thank you to leave or better yet, I'll go into the house and slam the door."

Surprise registered in his dark eyes, briefly giving her a moment of triumph, that she had disarmed and surprised him. But once again the emotion on his face was wiped clean and she rose to her feet, her intent of going out of the door and getting as far away from Rhett as possible.

But he was quicker then her and grabbed her shoulders. She stiffened instantly and glared up at him defiantly.

"Release me."

"Scarrlett, look at me," he cajoled. "I didn't mean to offend you. Haven't I been pleasanter lately?"

"Only when it pleases you," she shot back, letting herself vent her frustration. It was true but only because he wanted some peace for himself, not because he was truly sorry for being rude to her.

He nodded. "I deserve that. But I am willing to be pleasant and had no intentions of-er raising your ire. A truce, my pet? You know you can trust me to play the gentleman."

Even now that she knew she loved him, she wondered if she could trust him. She hadn't been able to trust him much with that Belle and their marriage. Yet, he hadn't given her much of a chance to prove herself trustworthy and definitely hadn't given her a chance to explain that the incident at the mills with Ashley was purely innocent. Thoughts of paying him back were highly satisfying.

"Fiddle-dee-dee, you are no gentleman," she lightly said. "But…"

"Irresistible?" At her rolling of her eyes he walked over to her and looked her n the eyes. "I am forgiven?"

She pretended to think a moment. "Only if you beg on your knees."

Laughing he placed a hand on his heart. It reminded Scarlett of the time he had proposed to her and brought a moment of pain at the thought of it. But she was still in good humor when he chuckled.

"But forgive me, my dear Mrs. Butler for being so thoughtless. I forgot the delicacy of your genteel spirit." Going onto his knee, he grinned. "Pray forgive me or my soul will be tortured at the thought of you plotting a way to make my life miserable...Now the neighbors shall see what a devoted husband I am."

"You miserable? I don't believe it," she said. "I bet you have never lost sleep a day in your life for offending anyone."

Rising up to his feet, he smiled. "You know me all too well, my pet. Before I lost your attention, I was merely speaking of my shopping excursion with Wade and Ella. You do remember it is less then a week until Christmas?"

The Christmas spirit was everywhere in Charleston. From the shopping to the garland that hung everywhere. She hadn't thought much about Christmas however. Even though most of their marriage had been a war, Christmas had always been a happy time. The children had always been full of smiles and excitements with her watching Rhett humor them and purchase elaborate gifts.

What she wanted most was the spirit of the year to somehow lure Rhett and her together. Though he had been amiable, it was passion and love she wanted. Maybe this Christmas would be the key to her happiness. But then she thought of how selfish she was being when the two people she had loved would miss from this Christmas. She felt a deep pang in her chest.

This was her last chance, before she left to win Rhett back. She hadn't broached on the subject about leaving. She couldn't stay longer with Rhett when he claimed to not love her. Now, she knew was the perfect time since Rhett and her were finally alone. The children hadn't relented their grip on Rhett since his recovery. It was as if they thought he would die like Melanie.

"Rhett-I wanted to speak with you about something," she began.

"Yes?" he calmly asked.

It really shouldn't be so hard to tell him that she was leaving. Never prior to this time had she cared how he felt. Now, admitting she was leaving seemed as if she were giving up. Never would she give him up, she fiercely thought, at least not to divorce. Though she was leaving, Rhett would always be connected to her. Her eyes squarely met his, unblinkingly.

"When you were sick, I had decided that after you were well the children and I would return to Atlanta."

Waiting for some sort of reaction, she watched him with a guarded look. He gave none.

"That is your prerogative, my pet. But I would ask that you wait until after St. Cecilia's ball for my mother's sake."

Anger rose in her. She wondered if he was always calm and collected. If he always thought about his own desires and never her own. To hell with what he wanted! She was through being walked on, even if she did love him.

"I have spent my life listening to you, Rhett Butler," she gritted, eyes glittering. "It was always what you wanted that I did. Like a pet you prodded and kicked me. Well, I'll stay in Charleston for Eleanor but not you!"

"I take it you're angry again?" he silkily asked.

In response she turned on her heel and walking to the front door, she opened and slammed the door soundly behind her, no longer caring what anyone thought. Her perfectly crafted plan was turning into shambles. Nothing had changed and she wished for a brief moment she could tell Rhett to go to Halifax.

XXX

Scarlett was slightly apprehensive about shopping. She had no idea what to purchase for Rhett. Anger still held her ransom in concern to Rhett. Really, she shouldn't get him a thing but now that her anger had subsided somewhat to his careless concern for her, she knew she had to get him something.

Somehow before this time she hadn't given it much thought. He had seemed pleased of what she had got him in the past, but she hadn't put much thought into it. All her presents for Rhett had been solely out of duty. Now she certain this would prove her feelings for him in a way her words couldn't. But what could one get Rhett Butler? He was the man with every luxury and material thing on God's green earth. Certainly he didn't really want anything.

She was asking herself this as she rounded the corner to King Street. It was swarmed with people along the sidewalks. Being a businesswoman and shopper, she was used to crowds but her face slightly fell and she nearly groaned. She didn't know how she would ever find the perfect gift for Rhett in this mob!

"Wohoo! Scarlett, dear!" a voice cried loudly.

Scarlett froze and looked around; she didn't see anyone calling for her. Her eyes searched the crowd as a boy walking his dog rushed past her and a cackling, buxom woman. Hearing her name again, a round woman pushed through two men talking, waving ecstatically.

Raking her mind as to who the woman was, she couldn't remember. She was stout with a full pale face and dark hair that was pulled back with ringlets. Her cheeks were rosy and her eyes danced much like a girl's but for the life of her, she couldn't place the woman.

"Scarlett- you remember me don't you? Oh you simply must," the woman gushed.

"Um..."

"I'm Miss Carrington but you may call me Patsy..."

The woman was rambling. Scarlett eyed her, deep in her own thoughts. There was nothing beautiful about Patsy Carrington. She reminded her slightly of Pittypat but with more coloring and youth on her side. There was a girlish charm about her but she certainly hadn't stuck out in Scarlett's mind. Where on earth had she met her?

"Certainly I remember you," she swiftly lied, grabbing her arm, as she would do to a friend. "I am a silly goose that is quiet surprised by this crowd."

Patsy smiled widely. "Charleston at its best. I would have noticed you anywhere in a crowd! The other day my aunt was telling me that you were the most becoming woman in all of Charleston."

That captured Scarlett's attention. "People are saying that?"

"Of course," she gushed. "Oh, but I must go. I will certainly call on you soon and I hope we shall be great friends."

Then the woman was off in a whirlwind. She had the mind span of Ella; Scarlett couldn't help but think as she was jostled in the crowd. A few men were looking at her with a look she knew well, but she ignored them.

Stopping in front of a store, merchandise in the window caught her eye and she came in. She knew a good store when she saw one. The jingling of the bell announced her entrance and a woman stood behind the counter, middle aged but still with a straight posture and easy smile.

"May I be of assistance?" she asked. Suddenly her face brightened and she quickly rounded the corner. Her movements were hurried and Scarlett was surprised as the woman grabbed her hand with a bright smile.

"You are Mrs. Scarlett Butler are you not?"

"Yes," Scarlett said, wondering why the woman was so overjoyed at seeing her.

"Oh, I noticed the eyes right away! People were telling me how you stood out. Imagine that! You coming into my little store... I have heard of you for weeks now but despaired of not meeting the heroine of Charleston."

Scarlett's jaw dropped open, and an incredulous laugh emerged from her lips. It was all too amusing. Her a heroine? What a laugh that was, that she should be reviled at home but here they gloried at sight of her.

"Certainly you are mistaken. I am no heroine-"

"Oh and modest too!" The woman said. "No, no I won't believe that you aren't as wonderful as they say. I have heard of your belief in woman's rights and attending the lectures. Mrs. Brown speaks of you often in the best light and not to mention you saved your husband, risking your own life."

Scarlett wanted to tell her she was a fool and the rest of them. She could imagine Mrs. Brown singing her praises that weren't true. As for the lectures, she abhorred them and she hadn't truly risked her life for Rhett, her health yes but not her life. She wasn't that saintly. But why not humor them and accept the praise?

"I could do no less Mrs..." she laughed lightly. "I do not know your name."

"Oh forgive my manners. I am Mrs. Carrington."

Her brow furrowed in thought. Where had she heard that name? Suddenly it struck her.

"You don't happen to be related to Patsy Carrington do you?"

"She is my niece."

Scarlett nearly laughed. What a topsy turvy world it was. The Carrington's must think of her in some heroic light. What a laugh it was, but how fun to deceive people when it was all for the right reasons.

The door opened and the jingling of the bell made Scarlett turn her head slightly to see whom the customer was. Her smile froze as she saw Mrs. Sally Bright walk in. She again wore a fashionable gown, red in color with a hat that was tied under her chin. Her ear bobs looked outlandishly expensive.

"Mrs. Butler, what a surprise," she said, but her voice didn't sound as if she were.

"Mrs. Bright," she coolly returned, feeling her anger rising, there was something about this smiling woman that angered her.

Mrs. Carrington greeted Sally and returned to her counter. Scarlett told herself she should leave the horrid woman's company right away, but she had been here first and she would not show defeat or run off. She forced herself to stay rooted to the spot.

"How is Rhett these days?" Sally asked in a honeyed voice, her eyes overly eager.

It was shameful that way she was flaunting her obvious infatuation over Rhett, Scarlett thought. She would have sharply told her just what she thought of her but only Mrs. Carrington's presence stopped her.

"Quiet well. Indeed we shall return home after the holidays." There, she thought with victory. She had every intention of getting Rhett as far away from that woman as possible.

Sally laughed and the sound irked Scarlett. The awful woman walked over to a bolt of calico and ran her hand over it.

"That isn't what he told me our last visit..."

"Then you are misinformed," Scarlett coldly said. "My husband's welfare is none of your concern."

The woman's laughter further angered her and turning on her heel, Scarlett left the store. She nearly slammed the door behind her but stopped the urge. Hating that woman worst then she had ever hated that Watling creature. At least Watling had never the gall to speak with her in public in that manner. God's nightgown did Rhett have a Madame in every state? Thoughts of revenge swirled in her head, nothing would give her more satisfaction the squarely punching that Bright woman in the face.

TBC


	30. Oh, Christmas Tree

Note: We're nearing the big part in the story yay! Thanks so much for all the reviews and encouragement. You gents and ladies are amazing. Thank you Princess Alica, alex67400, sohhkb, Catastrophic. Composer., EugeniaVictoria, missysammy, xXxlilnoel09xXx, Joyce LaKee, seeleysangel and Miss Bridget Sharpe.

Part 30

Scarlett pushed thoughts of revenge out of her mind for the infamous Sally Bright for the time being. She wanted this Christmas to be the best, and not even that awful woman would ruin her mood. Yet, as a few days passed since her encounter at the Carrington Store, she began to contemplate just what that woman was to Rhett.

She wouldn't share him with any woman she stubbornly thought. She told herself that Rhett couldn't prefer that Bright woman's company to hers. Yet, Scarlett who had always been vain in thinking she was far better looking then most women, felt herself slowly admitting that she was no longer sixteen when she had first met Rhett.

Thus, she was tortured at night with thoughts of Rhett holding Mrs. Bright, of him kissing her and them laughing behind her back. She thought of confronting Rhett but that would never do. Surely she couldn't let him know she was madly jealous for he would still think her childish, and if there was one thing she was determined, that Rhett would see she had changed and she no longer threw tantrums to get her way, all though the thought of screaming out in the streets and forcefully attacking Sally Bright was most welcome.

She had been shopping all day once again; scouring King Street for the best gift and also she had went to the post office to send Ashley a reply to his letter. Corresponding with Ashley was oddly comforting. Not because she loved him, but she felt somehow closer to Atlanta and Melanie. As strange as it sounded, the letters were sometimes the only things that kept her sane, since she was keeping her promise to Melanie.

There was no need to tell Rhett she was writing Ashley. He didn't tell her everything he did and Scarlett knew speaking of Ashley would only confirm his suspicious or he would get angry. So she didn't dwell on it much. Christmas was her sole focus and had the perfect gift for everyone and was quiet satisfied with the deals she had got. Though she had money, she wouldn't let anyone trick her into paying a penny more then the actual cost.

Now, it was Christmas Eve, it was hard to admit that she had been in Charleston now for a little over two months and she had yet to make Rhett admit his love for her. She knew if only she tried harder he would give in. But something made her simply want to languish in Charleston, to rest from the hell she had been through in Atlanta. Scarlett knew that she wouldn't get Rhett back by sitting in Charleston not doing a thing. The fact remained that within a few days she would be headed back to Atlanta.

"I won't think about that now," she muttered to herself, her arms heavy laden with gifts. Walking through the hallway to the parlor she set them down on the settee. And went in search for Eleanor, Rosemary, Rhett or the children. But the house seemed empty. Rounding the corner she saw Lucille who was coming towards her due to her insistent voice.

"Where is everyone at, Lucille?" Scarlett asked.

"Miss Eleanor, Miss Rosemary and Mistha Rhett went down to buy a tree. They took the chillun with them to pick it out."

"They did? But Christmas is tomorrow. Why on earth would they want to put up a tree now?" Scarlett muttered mostly to herself.

She could not fathom why the tree wasn't put up in advance so it could be decorated perfectly. Planning had always been important to Scarlett but it was after all Rosemary and Eleanor's home. She thanked Lucille and head back to the parlor.

Since she was alone she sat down on the settee next to the packages, pushing a few aside, slipping off her shoes for a moment, freeing herself of the confining heels. Taking off her hat she carelessly slung it over the arm rest and rested her head against the back of the chair, surprised that she had been feeling so very drained lately. She who could dance hours was now tired by the simple task of shopping, although she would never admit it.

But Scarlett had to admit she hadn't slept well lately. Since Rhett had recovered only a week prior, it had seemed silly that he would continue to sleep on the floor and not to mention with his leg still sore. Scarlett was more then happy to have him sleeping beside her, though he didn't lift one had to touch her, but kept his body a distance from hers.

It was frustrating but Scarlett couldn't help but feel a small victory that he was in her bed once again and just maybe soon there would be more. But due to the close proximity of Rhett beside her, she couldn't sleep at night. Holding her breath until he fell asleep, in which she would relax and observe him with frustration and longing. Even her dreams were filled with him...

She must have dozed a few minutes for the next thing she knew there was the sound of the door crashing against the wall and voices in the hallway. Hurriedly slipping on her shoes and patting her hair, just as Rhett pushed into the parlor door. He was carrying a tree that was slightly taller than him.

"The children picked it," he explained, walking across the room and laying it down. Rosemary, Eleanor and the children also came in. Their voices were filled with excitement and there was a glow about everyone's eyes. The excitement was contagious and Scarlett couldn't help but smile as she got up and examined the tree, standing beside Rhett.

"It has to be by far the best Christmas tree I have ever seen," she declared.

"I chose it mother," Wade declared, pride evident in his voice. But Ella ran in front of Wade and stuck out her tongue.

"Did not! I chose it, you wanted an ugly brown one." She looked at Rhett for affirmation. "Didn't he Uncle Rhett?"

Everyone broke out in laughter. Scarlett saw Rhett's eyes dancing in amusement and felt glad that he was happy. She was happy and life for once seemed well and couldn't remember a time she had looked forward to Christmas for years. Not since 1864 when Ashley had returned on his furlough but even that paled in comparison to now.

"I shall sing Christmas carols tomorrow," Rosemary declared.

"Heaven forbid," Rhett said with a laugh in which she glared at her brother.

"I don't see what is so amusing. I want to spread holiday cheer for those that don't have what we have."

Scarlett didn't see how Rosemary could do so much charity work. Her days were spent reading, going to lectures and charities. Well, that was fine but Scarlett wouldn't go spend Christmas in the freezing cold singing to a bunch of strangers. Rosemary was very odd.

Eleanor was laughing as she embraced Scarlett. "Sometimes they act like little children." She drew Scarlett away from the conversation and the children, lowering her voice. "I spoke with Rhett, my dear and I was hoping when the children go to sleep Rhett and you would decorate the tree."

Scarlett slowly smiled. She loved anything that had to do with decorating and Rhett and her alone for Christmas Eve sounded just heavenly.

"Of course, Eleanor."

Eleanor patted her cheek and Scarlett couldn't keep the triumphant smile off her face as she grabbed her packages and began to carry them up to the room to wrap later.

XXXX

Hours later, as the clock chimed announcing that it was nine o'clock did Scarlett finish her task of wrapping the gifts. She heard Rhett's deep voice as she came down the stairs and headed for the parlor. Coming to the door, she rested against the doorjamb and saw that Rhett sat on the settee, with Wade and Ella on each side of him. He was reading A Christmas Carol and the children were rapt by Rhett's voice that flowed easily. Though she didn't care for books, even she couldn't help but listen. His head was bent over the pages and his hair seemed to glisten, she felt trepidation even as she felt excitement at the thought of being alone with him.

Eleanor and Rosemary had retired only a short time before and it was the children's bedtime. After a minute more of Rhett reading, Scarlett stepped forward.

"It is time for bed," she announced.

"Oh mother," Wade groaned.

Ella looked disappointed, her face slightly falling into a pout but she got up to her feet. "Just a little longer?" she begged.

Scarlett's eyes met Rhett's. She thought of giving in but knew she must be firm. They were being far to spoiled by Rosemary, Eleanor, Rhett and Aunt Eulalie as it was.

"Ella Lorena, are you going to mind mother or not?" Scarlett irritably asked, placing her hands on her hips with a firm expression. They glumly nodded and gave Rhett the customary kiss to his cheek. He gave Wade a slight hug, knowing of a boy's independence, not wanting to be coddled and hugged Ella longer, giving her a smack on the cheek that made her giggle and race outside of the parlor door and up the steps.

She moved to go tuck them in but Rhett stopped her.

"It's okay, my pet. I will tuck them in. You can get started on the tree, it will be a long night."

For a moment she stood in the middle of the room, unmoving as she watched him stride away. Just the way he moved and how he held his body captivated her. Pulling her mind from thoughts of Rhett, she got to business.

Finding a box of ornaments, she went to the tree Rhett had stood up in the corner of the room, adjacent to the fireplace. Eleanor had conveniently placed a stool there and she bent over, picking it up and placing the small wooden stool next to the tree.

Grabbing the hem of her skirt, she stepped up the stool, while holding a few ornaments in the other hand. Scarlett eyed the tree with a frown as she tried to imagine where each ornament should go. It was a rather tall, thin tree and two many ornaments would hold down the all ready thin branches.

She placed on a few ornaments when the sound of footsteps coming towards the room made her pause. Looking over her shoulder with a welcome smile, she knew it was Rhett.

"How does it look so far?" she asked.

He eyed it as he advanced further into the room. "Awful."

She tossed her head. "Let's see if you can do better."

He smiled as he walked closer to her; she was almost level to him since she was on the stool. He grabbed a few ornaments after a moment of observing them. He then placed a red bulb at the center.

"Don't put so much thought into it," he said, "The best trees are throwing the ornaments on."

Placing on another bulb, she burst out laughing. He looked at her with raised brows.

"Oh, Rhett it's crooked," she said. "Let me do it." She reached over and straightened the bulb on the branch, only to totter for a moment but she caught herself laughingly.

"You little fool, reaching where you can't reach," he joked. "Are you trying to break your neck?"

"Fiddle-dee-dee. I have climbed higher then this. I used to climb the highest trees at Tara and I assure you I didn't fall once...Well maybe once but I was still better and quicker then the boys."

As she was speaking, she was careless, and the stool rocked beneath her feet. She let out a cry as she began to fall sideways but Rhett swiftly moved where she fell against him, her chest against his and her eyes staring into his. His arms went around her to keep her from falling completely.

"And you were saying Mrs. Butler?"

She couldn't find her voice. Being so close against Rhett was muddling her mind. She swallowed as she pulled away from him.

"M-maybe I should get down." She grabbed her train and took two steps down, coming onto her feet and thankful that she was on solid earth again. She saw that the tree wasn't near being finished; indeed only half of it was covered with bulbs while the other was bare.

"Oh, Rhett! It's simply awful."

"It has potential," he said, stroking his chin as he eyed the wreck of a tree. "Let's take a break and have some port. We'll toast to the spirit of Christmas."

She was only to happy to oblige as she took a seat on the settee and watched as Rhett went to the sideboard and produced two glasses, pouring them drinks. She couldn't keep her eyes off of his broad back and the way he pored the drinks with ease. Beginning to see anything Rhett did, he did with such ease that amazed her.

He gave her a grin; much like the one he had given her the day at Twelve Oaks. Her heart fluttered and she saw that he knew how much he affected her. His grin became wolfish as he handed her a cup and took a seat beside her. While her heart thrilled at the close proximity of his body near hers, she felt as if the walls were closing in on her.

Scarlett turned her head as she sipped tentatively. The window showed the inky darkness outside and a slight fog was on the window because of the drop in the temperature. The clock chimed and she was surprised to see it was all ready ten o'clock. Time had gone by fast.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked, his voice having odd effects on her.

"It is almost Christmas…"

Suddenly he got to his feet and began to walk towards the parlor door.

"Rhett, where on earth are you going?"

"To get your gift," he shot over his shoulder as he disappeared around the corner. "Let is be an apology present for my actions earlier..."

TBC


	31. Each Year You Bring Me Delight

Note: I am so nervous about posting this chapter. Many of your dreams will come true but a good part of it should I say, is leading up to one moment. Don't want to spoil it, but sorry if I drug it out too long. Thank you ang887, PrincessAlica, Mad Steph, Thwarted Moony, Catastrophic. Composer., seeleysangel, missysammy, xXxlilnoel09xXx and Joyce LaKee. Here is the scene many of you have been waiting for, and I hope I did it justice.

** Part 31**

Her gift? Feeling much like a child as she waited, wondering why he would want to give her the gift early and feeling like a naughty child that was going to peek at her Christmas gift. The suspense was maddening and then Rhett returned, shutting the door behind him and coming over to her with a smile.

"I thought it was better you opened it privately."

Sitting beside her, his gaze was serious for a moment as he handed it to her. She took the small package that was fashionably wrapped in green paper and had a little bow tied around it. Making herself slowly open the gift, lest he see her impatience.

The bow was off and that left the paper. Gradually, she undid the sides and she saw a small box. Opening the box there lay a small locket with a small glass crystal that showed the contents. She had no idea what it was and looked up at Rhett confusedly.

"Miss Melly saved a lock of Bonnie's hair," he slowly said, his gaze dropping for a moment. "I thought that you would like it."

Her hands shook as she opened the locket and lightly touched her daughter's raven lock as if hypnotized. She didn't realize she was crying until she felt the salty tears on her lips and she shut the locket quickly. In an instant Rhett's arms were around her and she held him as if she were drowning.

"I know, Scarlett, I know," he heavily whispered. "I thought you would like some part of her. She always loved Christmastime."

It was one of the first times he had openly spoken of Bonnie since her death. And she realized that he was comforting her. She hadn't comforted him after Bonnie's death; indeed she had blamed him with hot venomous words that made her cringe at thinking about them now, and cried harder if it were possible, still occasionally glancing at the package that was on her lap.

"I don't blame you for Bonnie..." she whispered, looking up at him a she pulled away. "I was such a fool for saying it was your fault. I didn't mean a word of it. Oh, I am so sorry. It has haunted me ever since then just as everything else has."

She saw his throat work and she wondered if he would cry but he managed to compose himself.

"Scarlett-"

She placed a finger over his lip, silencing him. "Don't speak." Drawing nearer to him and placed her hand on his cheek. For moment he seemed to move his rugged cheek closer to her touch. Then a brief hesitation before he brought her to him, his lips slowly meeting hers. His lips seemed to burn her skin: her lips, cheeks and neck as they moved over her and she grabbed onto his head, her fingers running through his dark hair and holding him to her.

"I know I shouldn't do this," he muttered. "But God I need you..."

"Then have me," she said, her voice was a dare, a plea.

Rhett rose to his feet and looked down at her. She thought he would change his mind and her breath seemed to stop as she waited, her eyes searching his. Then he held out his hand to her in silent invitation. Without hesitation she eagerly took his hand in hers. The package would be forgotten until the morning as Rhett and her left the parlor and quietly walked through the dim halls; all was silent but the mad beating of her heart.

Then they walked up the stairs, reaching the landing. The dark shadows obscured his face but she could tell he was deep in thought as the came to their room and they went in. He shut the door behind them. Now alone, his eyes raked over hers and she stood there bereft, wondering what do to, looking down at her feet before looking at him. So many words she wanted to say but she was struck silent. She wanted to tell him she loved him, wanted him and had waited ages.

But she didn't finish her train of thought as he moved swiftly like an Indian; once again he took her in his arms. A cry of surprise and joy emerged from her lips as he kissed her again. This time she knew he wouldn't pull away as she held him to her, letting herself go for the first time in her life.

Body hard against his, they stumbled towards the bed but Rhett easily caught himself and set her down upon coverlets, watching her as he slowly began to undress. First his shirt was shed, revealing his tanned skin and the muscles of his arms. Scarlett felt her heart thrum loudly and her mouth go dry. Never had she seen a man so handsome. The only thing left was his pants and a feeling of desire raced through her, unlike anything she had ever known.

He kneeled down, in a move that surprised her and lifted her left leg, maddeningly caressing her skin with his warm hands and moving higher and higher until he reached the inside of her thighs and she let out a deep breath, arching her body into his touch.

"Rhett…"

Not content to merely caress her skin with the obstruction of clothing, he made move to remove her dress, corset and chemise until she only remained in her stockings. His dark head bent over her legs as he removed the stockings and parted her legs gently, his eyes meeting hers.

Scarlett's face flamed and she shivered. She was completely naked, whereas he still had his pants on. To remedy that situation, she thought of all the things she had heard: the whispers of wife's pleasing their husbands, none of the things she would have never dared to do. And before she could act, Rhett had bent his dark head between her parted thighs and gently began to kiss a trail that felt as if she were on fire and he neared her source of desire to her shock.

"You mustn't," she gasped, briefly scandalized and shocked.

But he paid her no heed as he unrelenting worked his magic upon her. The very surprise that desire and pleasure could be done without the act of sex was a revelation. One in which she was powerless but her hips moved forward and she her hands went to his head and grasped onto his hair. It seemed to last forever until she thought she would faint with the stark pleasure until he suddenly moved away.

"What do you want, Scarlett?" he gently asked in a low voice. "Tell me."

She stared at him with wide-eyed disbelief. Couldn't he tell that she wanted him? But he stared at her expectantly and some part of her knew words wouldn't suffice. Dear God, she thought, her mother would be rolling around in her grave at her next move. She knew Rhett wanted her, even as she wanted him, and it filled her with power and unrestraint. It was a feeling like she had never known and she rose to her shaky legs, staring down at Rhett.

"I want you."

Standing up to his feet, he towered over her. Distance remained between them and he merely searched her eyes for any sign that she would change her mind. Which made her close the chasm between them and place her hands against his bare chest. His skin was warm to the touch and her fingers spanned open. Then her hands trailed across his body, from the dark hair on his chest, the scar and to his waist.

She licked her lips and stared up at him. "I-I think you should take off your pants."

"Be my guest," he cajoled.

Blushing at the stark intimacy of undressing him, her trembling hands went to his pants and she wordlessly undid them. They fell into a puddle at his feet along with his undergarment. He stood completely and gloriously naked before her. Revealing the long and well-muscled legs and the other parts of him she had never thought to admire. His masculinity radiated from him and she was breathless by it.

Scarlett knew very little on the art of pleasure. But she wound her arms around his neck and hesitantly began to trail kisses along his cheeks, lips, throat and shoulders. And when his lips met hers, she began to return his kisses with fervor, her nails raking across his back, and her chest pressed hard against his in a friction that made her toes curl.

Rhett's hands moved down to her buttocks and pushed her against him. In response her legs wrapped around his hips and she let out a moan into his mouth as his tongue prodded into her mouth. Copying his actions, her tongue dueled with his; her eyes tightly closed as he placed her on the bed once again and poised himself above her, his arms holding supporting him, so that he wouldn't crush her with his weight.

The dark face above hers was like the man who had bedded her three years before. Passion was in his eyes and they glowed like twin coals. Dazedly, she stared up at him with hazy eyes of passion. Her lips still tingled where he had only kissed her headily moments before.

Then sweeping across her entire body was his lips, his moustache slightly tickling her but making her feel his burning kisses all the more. From her breasts to her stomach and the inside of her thighs until she was writhing beneath him, her eyes closing shut and fluttering open to watch him on his exploration of her body. It was maddening and slow.

"I want you," she deamanded in a low voice. "Now."

Seemingly, he ignored her request and only continued to tease her with his slow kisses. His moustache tickled her, yet made her breathing heighten, almost painful. Thus, she couldn't take it anymore and gripped him, her legs wrapping around his thighs and pushing against his in an attempt for him to finally take her. But he didn't and merely bit her shoulder gently.

A cry emerged from her lips and her nails sank into his shoulders. "Rhett… please." Realizing she was reduced to begging but somehow she didn't think about it. Her sole focus was Rhett over her and needing him.

"Not, yet," he softly said, his voice husky and sending shivers through her spine.

But she didn't want to wait and arched her body against his, pushing at his shoulders with her arms. Pushing him onto his back so that she was straddling. A sense of power came over her, that he was finally at her mercy and the roles had been reversed. Green eyes frankly swept across him, in unabashed admiration.

"I don't know what to do," she admitted, her face flaming at her ignorance. For once she wished she could have known how to please Rhett. But that had never been her goal until now. She ducked her head but felt his finger under her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze. Somehow his eyes gave her the courage to take action.

Thinking of all the possibilities, she moved off of him, to his side and her hand hesitantly went to his manhood, fondling him on her own accord. A move she had never made in their six years of marriage. Her eyes were watching his and she felt satisfied at hearing the groan that came from his lips and the pleasure she was giving him. Her touches became firmer and bolder as she explored her newfound technique, watching him with a slight, cattish smile on her face.

Suddenly, his hand caught her wrist in an iron grip and he let out a ragged breath.

"No more minx," he muttered.

A gentle laugh escaped her lips as he rolled her over onto her back so that he was poised over her again and ravished her mouth with his. Still, he was at a distance from her, their bodies not touching. Her hands pulled him down hard upon her, so that his body crushed hers into the mattress. Scarlett was barely able to breath but she didn't care, greedily welcoming his extra weight pinning her down.

Even when he tried to stop kissing her, she pulled his lips back down upon hers, hard. For once her lips were brushing against his in her own accord and she was moving under him sensually, her nails making marks against his skin, even as her legs wouldn't release him.

"You still love me," she whispered breathlessly, her eyes blazing into his. "Say it."

He stilled completely, and stared at her with a serious expression. "No, by God I don't love you anymore but I still want you more than I have ever wanted any other woman."

Words flew to her lips but he silenced them as he thrust into her with such ease and force, a startled cry emerged from her lips and a gasp. Being completely stretched and invaded by Rhett wasn't familiar. She had never thought of it much during their quick and ritualistic act of lovemaking. Never had she wanted him as she did now or welcomed him.

Head arcing back, she parted her thighs further and took more of him if it was possible… and it was. His voice was hoarse as he muttered something, she couldn't understand. Some part of her knew he wouldn't whisper love words to her, as he began to move in earnest, yet she didn't care. The movement intensified and words and feelings swirled in her mind. Causing her nails to dig deeper into his shoulders and for her to lightly nip him on the neck, a move that was beyond her control.

"I love you," she said against his ear and the warmth of his skin. All thoughts of modesty were gone from her or reserve. Her body wasn't able to remain still and she moved under him as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

The pleasure intensified, cascading across her so that her words were repeated with moans and sighs. "Oh, God, Rhett," she choked. "I never knew…"

The thought of such pleasure in his arms had never been attainable. There had been that one drunken night but it was nothing compared to this. He wasn't brutally using her this time without her consent first and she wanted him as she had never wanted or desired anyone in her entire life.

Arching her trembling body into his, he groaned out her name. No words of love came from his lips but she knew deep within her soul that he did love her. She arched her body again and this time he let out a cry of utter triumph and pleasure as both were taken by the tide of pleasure and he fell heavily upon her, even as she cried out his name one last time.

And as their breathing returned to a normal pace and he fell atop of her, she stroked his damp hair. An icy feeling filled her at what would come in the morning but she wouldn't think of that now, she'd think about that tomorrow. It wasn't long when Rhett rolled off of her onto his side, his back facing her and she reached toward him.

"Rhett."

"Go to sleep," he gruffly said, not willing to meet her eyes. Rising up in his complete nakedness, he went to the light and extinguished it. Sliding back into the bed, he did take her loosely in his arms and sigh. Although words were on her lips she held them in and it was not long before her tired mind claimed sleep.

TBC


	32. How Lovely are Thy Branches

Note: I loved everyone's reviews. So excited to get them and all you thought I did the scene justice. Many of you can probably guess where this is going and there will be trouble ahead, well by next chapter  I thank my 12 reviewers, you know who all you amazing people are! (Plus I'm lazy to list you all) but I know many of you have faithfully been reviewing and I so appreciate it. Please enjoy.

Part 32

It was the light filtering through the shuttered window that awoke Scarlett; she blinked against the harsh light. In a sate of semi-consciousness, she became aware of her surroundings. Her eyes fluttered open and she didn't move for a moment before the events of last night flooded through her mind.

Flying up to a sitting position, the blankets grasped to her neck. She didn't see Rhett anywhere and for a moment hot anger rushed through her before she saw him. He was sitting by the window in an upholstered chair. Freshly dressed and smoking a cigar. The still look in his eyes showed he was deep in thought as he smoked and gave no indication that he had seen her rise.

Her heart hammered at the sight of him. Knowing now that he loved her. No man could make love to a woman as he had made love to her if he didn't. Her eyes lingered on him and she couldn't keep the ridiculous smile off of her face.

"Hello, Rhett," she brightly greeted, a smile playing around her lips. If he had been looking at her, he would have seen the happiness glimmering in her eyes.

He didn't even look at her but replied, "I didn't know you had woke up." It was not happy but solemn and almost grave. Finally he did look at her.

Awareness coursed through her. She slightly blushed but was still smiling. Knowing she must look ridiculous but she didn't care. All was right with the world, Rhett loved her and it was Christmas. Never had she felt so happy as she did at that moment.

"About last night," he began, still far from her. "I have no excuses. The fact remains that we were both emotional about…" he trailed off, not ale to speak her name, though they both knew.

"Rhett you needn't explain," she lightly said.

"But I must," he said rising to his feet and coming towards her. Standing at the foot of the bed and he looked down at her. He looked most becoming, dressed but his shirt was open at the collar revealing his throat. A throat she had kissed many times last night and she blushed as she lowered her eyes.

"Scarlett," he was saying, "I won't say I regret it. Indeed I enjoyed the exchange. You are a quite passionate woman. But that's the problem; I won't get my feelings mixed up with pleasure. I meant what I said."

"We're married," she said, finally looking up at him, her eyes blazing. "And you love me."

"Surely you aren't naive," he said, turning from her and going tot he window, his back facing her. She stared at him with wide eyes. "Last night was purely physical. It won't happen again. We were emotional and I took advantage of your weakness. We were both caught up in the moment but that's it."

It dawned on Scarlett that he was trying to hide his feeling from her again. Oh, he had done so before but this time she wouldn't let him. She swallowed a sharp retort, feeling sick to her stomach. How dare he make light of what had happened last night. Hot anger rolled through her and she jumped out of the bed, sheet firmly wrapped around her body and stalked over to him, eyes angry.

"How dare you, Rhett Butler! You can make light of this all you want but I know that you love me and you are a damned coward!" She would have hit him or beat at his chest if not for her attempt to keep the sheet around her body.

"I take it you are mad?" he enigmatically said, crossing his arms. He wasn't bothered by her anger and that made her all the more mad.

"Just go away!" she shouted. "Let me alone so I can dress you pig."

"Now I am a pig?" he asked with raised brows. "You didn't say that last night..." He sighed. "I won't have you causing a scene on Christmas. We'll finish this discussion later, Scarlett. Get dressed and come downstairs, you'll behave or I'm liable to take you over my knees and spank you."

"Just try!" She gritted, her eyes blazing with challenge. "I'll come downstairs and act as if nothing were wrong. But mark my words, Rhett, you won't get away with last night or shrug it off as if nothing happened."

"I'll send Lucille up," he simply said, turning on his heel and leaving.

The sound of the door shutting was deafening. She had good mind to throw something at his dark head later. But for now she would curb her anger. Later however, Rhett would be sorry. Falling on the bed glumly, she looked towards the window. It didn't feel like Christmas, she felt awful and wished she could feign a headache.

When Lucille arrived, she was still was sitting on the bed; with the sheets tightly wrapped around her. Her mind was in a daze as she systematically rose for Lucille to aid her. But her mind kept replaying last night. It were as if it were a dream, a delicious, delightful dream that had seemed slow as a waltz.

Now, in the aftermath, she felt the sickening reality that Rhett had used her once again. He claimed not to love her and he would always do so. He would always take what he wanted from her and then discard it. No, she wouldn't let him.

She mumbled the customary responses to Lucille. Finally, she was dressed in a green dress. Only today would she do so today since she wouldn't be leaving the house. Yet, strangely she missed her black gown, it matched her mood. Hair swept from her face, she looked in the mirror and saw the lines under her eyes from lack of sleep.

Coming to the top of the stairs, she took a few steadying breaths. With a smile firmly planted upon her lips, Scarlett slowly descended, her hands clutching the banister. She was the picture of serenity by the time she reached the parlor and heard the merry voices from the hall. Going in, she was greeted with the sight of the children, still in their nightclothes with ecstatic looks on their faces. She pointedly avoided Rhett's gaze as she came in.

"Merry Christmas," everyone seemed to greet in unison.

Weakly returning it, she finally spared a glance at Rhett. He was slouched against the wall by the tree. She saw by the looks of it, Rhett had brought down the presents earlier. All of a sudden, she felt uncomfortable at the thought of giving Rhett his present.

"I still don't see why only half the tree had bulbs," Rosemary said, shooting her brother a look.

Scarlett's face flamed. Her eyes went to the tree and sure enough in Rhett and her passions, she hadn't given anymore thought to the tree. Only half the tree had red bulbs on it and the other half was bare.

Besides the disaster of a tree, the parlor was everything she could have imagined it. The fire was lit, garland hung and even a mistletoe. Lucille was bringing in tea and hot chocolate for the children.

Deciding to retreat over by the children, Scarlett found it better instead of staying under Rhett's scrutiny. Never one to keep things in, she wanted to demand why he had made love to her, but that would never do. Not now, even though the very words were bursting from within her.

She took a seat on the settee and Wade and Ella drew closer to her. She held Ella, finding that showing affection for her children was coming much easier. Grabbing Wade's hand, she stared up at him and smiled brightly albeit fakely.

"How did you sleep, Wade?"

"Fine mother. But Ella kept waking me up and asking me if Santa had come yet." He shot her a dark scowl. Truly Wade had come out of his shell and even had begun to act as vivacious as Beau.

Everyone laughed in unison except Scarlett couldn't force herself to do so. Certain she was showing her emotions too much on her face… sparing a glance at Rhett. He had moved from his fixture at the wall and was now nearing the children. He had an easy smile on his face and she wished it would be directed at her.

But, no, that was too much to expect from the likes of Rhett Butler. Who was only kind when it suited him. She pushed the ungracious thoughts away as everyone drew to their places and the presents began to be distributed amongst them-first Wade and Ella would open theirs followed by the adults.

Scarlett only watched bits and pieces of what Ella and Wade had gotten. Ella got a bracelet and dress from Rosemary and Eleanor. Scarlett had gotten Ella a set of paints for she knew Ella liked color and Rhett had gotten her a new dress. While Wade received the normal things a boy would books and clothes. Scarlett had gotten him a chess set hoping to divert his attention from books.

Now it was time for Rhett to open his present from her and the children. The children had purchased a gift for him together. Wade brought it over to him and he smiled.

"Thank you son," he said and opened the gift slowly, both children leaning forward in anticipation at his reaction.

Once the package was pulled away, a scarf was revealed. A fine woolen scarf that the boy had chosen with thought of the cold weather. Rhett smiled warmly and Scarlett saw how he was touched.

Next, was Ella's gift. Scarlett knew what it was and she watched as Rhett took the offered gift. It was wrapped in a delicate package and opening it up was a picture she had drawn of Rhett the children and her together as a family. Rhett smiled and went over to Ella, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

"Thank you, honey."

The girl beamed with pleasure. She chattered about what colors she used. While Rosemary and Eleanor admired the drawing and got a set of there own from Ella. Scarlett saw that Ella was quite talented with paints for an eight-year-old girl.

Never had she been able to draw anything as discernible as Ella had. She nearly laughed, despite her subdued mood at the picture of Rhett had mustache and all. Rhett finally made move to open her present. It was a watch with the simple engraving: "with love always, Scarlett."

She cursed herself for getting it for him. How highly embarrassing to admit her love to him once again. However it had been purchased before she had given though to not making her feelings known. He didn't give an outward reaction but simply thanked her. It was going to be a long day.

Forcing herself to look away, he would be able to read her emotions all too clearly. She would have to bear it, was all. Although the thought of strangling him was highly satisfying or having the ground swallow her up.

XXXX

"Goodnight, Rosemary," Rhett said, giving his sister a peck on the cheek as she went toward her room. The children had long went to bed, all smiles as had Eleanor. Scarlett had retreated to their room, brooding and silent.

What Rhett needed was a drink but he forced himself not to. No, he would simply have to face her, though it scared the hell out of him.

Raking a hand through his hair, he easily went up the steps, leading to their room. The hallway was dimly lit and the house was silent. For once in his life during the Christmas festivities, he hadn't been able to read Scarlett's mood. He knew she was mad, yes, but beside that emotion, he didn't know how she would react. He was hoping she was sleeping, so that he would be saved from having to explain his actions in making love to her.

He hadn't meant to. Trying to stay far from her and her charms. But he had given in like a fool last night. Her tears and passion had been his undoing. It was worst that she had responded to him in a way he had never imagined and he had thrown all caution in the wind. Now he would reap the consequences he supposed.

Standing in front of the door for a moment, he took a breath and opened it, stepping into the dark room. Scarlett was lying back on the headboard, her arms crossed over her chest as if she had a chill. He saw that she was awake for her eyes were noticeable even in the darkness by the moonlight.

He undressed slowly, feeling her eyes bore into him. Odd that he should feel strange to have her appraise him so silently. He knew any moment she would speak. Yet, her silence was surprising. She who usually yelled, raged or was icy with him was now silent.

Once he was undressed, he knew he couldn't very well suddenly sleep on the floor once again as he had prior to his injury. Besides the floor wasn't as comfortable as the bed. He sat on his side and slipped between the sheets, turning from her.

"Good night, Scarlett."

"No," she quietly said, her voice rising. "Not anymore, Rhett. You think you can shut me out and pretend as if nothing happened. I won't let you."

Turning back to face her, he watched her move so quickly that it surprised him, her hands framing his face and her pale face close to his.

"Kiss me," she demanded. "If you don't, you're a coward."

The feel of her hands against his cheeks was his undoing. He should have known that he couldn't resist her. He had never been able to from the first moment he saw her. Closing the distance between them, he kissed her with surprising tenderness, his lips moving over her lips, cheeks and eyes.

Suddenly she pulled away, her hands pushing against his chest. "You won't regret it?"

He heard the vulnerability in her voice. The green eyes were narrowed and watching him. Even as her breathing had heightened and the thickness in her voice was evident.

He smoothed her hair from her face and cupped her cheeks, gently stroking them. And for once, he knew the next morning he wouldn't run or hide. He would glory in this night with Scarlett. Hadn't it been what they were destined for? Now she returned his desire and he would be a fool to refuse what she freely offered him.

"No, Scarlett. I won't regret it."

All resistance left her body as her lips came against his on her own accord. Her move surprised him but he gladly let her take the lead. There was no turning back, and strangely he didn't want to...

TBC


	33. Trouble in Paradise

Humming a merry tune, Scarlett awoke to find the bed empty beside her but she didn't care

Note: A huge thank you to my ten reviewers for chapter 32! If I could repay you all, I would  Many of you have guessed what will happen and Rhett will be Rhett so I hope this chappie isn't too much of a disappointment. Enjoy and please review.

Part 33

Humming a merry tune, Scarlett awoke to find the bed empty beside her but she didn't care, it was something she was used to. Well, except for the early days of their marriage when he would linger in bed, holding her, caressing her hair and simply touching her. Often times, she had been a fool and had coldly thought he just wanted to make love to her. But she now knew he had merely liked holding her simply because.

For once a feeling of contentment came upon her. She knew that Rhett wouldn't deny what had happened and it filled her with such happiness she hadn't known in years. The kind where she could rest instead of fighting and lying to get what she wanted.

Swinging her legs out of the bed, she was still wonderfully naked and placing the sheet around her body she luxuriously stretched with a contented sigh and rose to her feet. Her body was slightly sore but wonderfully satisfied, blushing at the thought.

Happy eyes met her gaze as she observed herself in the mirror. There was a ridiculous, giddy smile pasted on her lips and a laugh emerged from her mouth. Perhaps she had won, well both of them for she was certain they were equally happy.

"Rhett," she murmured with a little laugh. She remembered every detail of last night. The way he had felt and every expression upon his face. Never would she be able to suppress her feeling for him. Nor did she want to, for something had seized her and she never wanted to pretend again

And the note on the beaureau made her heart clench with excitement. Going over to the neat scrawled letter-as boldly written as the owner who had made it. She would know Rhett's writing anywhere.

_**Scarlett,**_

_**Last night was one of the most enjoyable nights of my remembrance…**_

Her face flushed from pleasure as she eagerly read on…

_**I told mama that you would have breakfast in bed and would most likely rest until the ball. In the closet you will find appropriate attire compared to the godforsaken black. I had business in town but I will return later this evening for the ball.**_

_**Yours,**_

_**Rhett**_

Hugging the letter to her heart, a little giggle escaped her and she spun around. Curiosity and excitement got the better of her as she went towards the closet and opening it, her eyes met the sight of the most exquisite dress she had seen in a long time.

It was sea foam green with short, tapered sleeves, a plunging neckline and flowed to the floor as if made of silk. Running her fingers over it, she indeed felt that the fabric was the top quality. And Rhett had purchased this gown for her! She would wear it gladly and have Lucille put up her hair and adorn it with blossoms.

Placing on her robe, she opened the door and summoned a maid to fetch Lucille. It would take her all day to prepare…

XXX

Rhett arrived back at the house, before supper began. Coming into the door, he handed his coat to one of the maids and took off his hat. His eyes were alive with light, an inner fire that had been absent for a long time.

It was happiness on his face; he knew that all too well. Scarlett, believe it or not had made him in high spirits. Even as she had been his misery, she was his momentary happiness. Not all of their marriage had been bad, though most of it had been horrific. He hadn't thought it was probable but he couldn't quit thinking about last night and keep the ridiculous grin off of his face.

Whistling he walked towards the dining room and passed Lucille a long the way.

"Lordy Mistha Rhett, I didn't even see you," she said, a hand going to her heart.

He grinned. "Forgive me, Lucille. Is the family having supper now?"

"Yes, sir but Miss Scarlett won't eat a bite, she is waiting for you."

That surprised him. Never had he known for Scarlett to wait for him. Yet, he found pleasure at the thought that she wanted to eat together. He had been a fool to think he was over Scarlett, far from that. Now he was coming to realize, she was very much a part of him.

Walking past Lucille, he walked into the dining room, his eyes first going to Scarlett's seated form that seemed utterly bored. Her chin was resting on her hand as she stared off into space. And he took the moment to observe her without her knowing. God, she did look breathtaking even in her black gown with her hair freely flowing around her shoulders. Framing her flawless face. Her smiled at the picture she made.

Ella alerted the family of his arrival. All eyes turned towards him but it was Scarlett's face his eyes lingered on. Her eyes lit up at the sight of him and her dimples played on her cheeks as her eyes warmly met his.

The memory of last night flowed between them in their eyes, but he dragged his eyes from hers and looked at the others.

"God I'm starving."

Eleanor chuckled. "You are on time for supper for once. Now sit down so we can all eat."

Gladly he did so, sitting beside Scarlett. Being so near her, was affecting him strongly. He hadn't thought he could feel for her again, but he did. Telling himself that he was over her, and her eyes couldn't turn his head and her pleas fell on deaf ears. What a fool he was. Never could he rid himself of her despite all of his attempts.

Turning his head slightly, he gave Scarlett a small smile. Her lips also crinkled at the corners and her eyes dropped. His interest was piped and he wondered what was lurking in her eyes.

As the supper slowly progressed, his thoughts turned to last night. Their lovemaking had been filled with a tender emotion that had seldom been there. Both had wanted each other, but it had been slow and unhurried, unlike the other times in which it was either frantic on his part or she was rigid in his arms.

Without a shadow of a doubt he knew Ashley wasn't in Scarlett's mind. It had only been him last night and that thought scared him. Why it should, he had no idea but the fact that he was finally getting what he had wanted years before was sobering. Now he wondered would he be a fool to accept it or even more a fool to disregard it?

Playfulness seized him and his hand moved under the table to her leg. There was a start on her part and her eyes flew to his in surprise. And as his hand roved up inside her thigh, the look she actually gave him was flirtatious and cattish. He grinned wolfishly, forgetting that they weren't alone.

"Uncle Rhett," Ella insistently said.

"Hmm…" He drew his eyes over to Ella who was pouting.

"Do we get to go out for ice cream tomorrow like you promised," she asked hopefully.

"Did I?"

He couldn't remember. Obviously he had though, and keeping his mind in the present and on supper was proving to be distracting.

"Yes, honey. I can't break a promise now can I?"

She vigorously shook her head. There were shared smiles around the table as Rhett turned his attention to Scarlett who had a smile lurking in the corners of her mouth. But God, she looked breathtaking. It wasn't what she was wearing for she was in the forsaken black but the expression on her face.

It was satisfied and peaceful, unlike anything he had seen on her face in a long time. True, the same expression had been on her face the few months following their marriage. It was happiness and hope that radiated from her, not to mention satisfaction. He wondered if she had enjoyed last night as much as he had.

When her eyes met his, he raised his eyebrows in silent question. For a moment, her face colored but then she shot him a dazzling smile, before turning away to capture Eleanor's attention.

"Eleanor, who will be at the ball tonight?"

"Oh, a great many people. Mrs. Brown, the Carrington's and…"

"The bluest blood in Charleston," Rhett asserted.

Eleanor shot him a mock frown but her lips turned into a smile as she sighed

"Do try to be on your best behavior," she chided.

Rhett couldn't resist throwing her a cheeky grin. "I'll try but I can't promise anything. If Scarlett watches me, I'll try to be a good boy."

Scarlett rolled her eyes but had the grace to laugh. "I daresay no one could turn you into a good boy, Rhett, you will always be a rascal."

He caught her hand and brought it to his lips, lingeringly. "One of my admirable attributes."

The look they shared was meaningful as he released her hand and turned his attention to Wade, who was oddly quite, more so then usual. It wasn't usual for him to be so quite and Rhett searched the boy's eyes.

"Why aren't you eating son?"

He shrugged. "I'm not hungry, Uncle Rhett."

Rhett knew it was more then a simple lack of appetite. Boys ate like horses at that age and Wade was no exception.

"Uncle Rhett," Ella butted in. "I know why Wade won't eat. It's because he's in love!"

Wade shot her a dark scowl. "Mind your own business, Ella."

Observing Wade, Rhett saw that there was high color on his cheeks and Wade was obviously embarrassed. Ah, the innocence of a childhood crushes. But he could tell this was a serious matter to Wade and Ella wasn't making it better. Sparing a glance at Scarlett, she shot him a helpless look.

Luckily, supper was coming to a close and as everyone rose, filing to the parlor. But Rhett stopped Scarlett by lightly capturing her attention.

"I will speak to Wade, Scarlett," he assured her, amused to see the look of relief cross her face.

"Thank you, Rhett," she sighed, her green eyes full of relief. "I wouldn't know what to say."

He chuckled. "I'm sure you would figure it out. But I take my leave Mrs. Butler." Taking her hand in his, he bent over and lightly kissed it, hearing a sharp intake of breath. Smiling, he rose up and with one glance at her; he turned on his heel and went out of the dining room, out into the hall where Wade was waiting for him.

When Wade saw him, his eyes dropped in embarrassment.

"You told me to wait for you Uncle Rhett."

"Yes, Wade. Let's go to the office and have a talk."

Wade complied, but seemed rather slow as he followed Rhett's strides up the stairs to the second floor. There was an office, which Rhett had previously used, as did Eleanor to keep a track of expenses.

It was a small room but served its purpose. Surprisingly it was rather stuffy inside despite the chill. Rhett lit a gaslight and sat down, Wade followed suit and he observed the boy for a moment before smiling.

"I wanted to talk to you son… man to man. For you are coming of age and it natural that… well that you would begin to be attracted to the fairer sex. I am right, aren't I?"

Wade nodded with a sigh. "Yes, Uncle Rhett. There's this girl…Her name is Mary. I met her one day at the park with Rosemary and Ella."

"Hmm, I see," murmured Rhett. "And have you seen her since then?"

Wade looked crestfallen. "No… Uncle Rhett, who was the first girl that you… cared about?"

Rhett raked his mind. There had been many women in his life, but thinking back to his boyhood, the slight crushes he had blended together. But the image of a red haired girl with freckles and green eyes came to his mind.

"I was about your age and there was this girl. Her name was- Rachel and she was the quietest girl in our class. I teased her mercilessly."

Wade's eyes shun as he leaned forward. "And-did you tell her that you cared for her Uncle Rhett?"

He chuckled. "Certainly not. Boys can be cruel at that age and if they had known I liked that poor girl, I would have heard no end of their mockery."

There was silence for a moment and Rhett watched the emotions cross Wade's face. Ah, the innocence of childhood, he remembered a time of his boyhood when he had selflessly liked girls. It wasn't until later that his motives became selfish. Now, the boy who had had known since a baby was coming to manhood. He had always considered Wade a son and wanted to help the boy have a better life then he had.

"She's very pretty," Wade continued. "She has green eyes like mother and the longest hair..."

"Your mother does have beautiful eyes," Rhett easily agreed.

"Can I ask you one more thing before I go?" Wade hopefully asked, looking hesitant. But Rhett nodded.

"Well-when did you know that you loved mother?"

The question surprised Rhett. Hearing a question he had so long posed to himself from another's lips. Scarlett and his relationship were complicated. He couldn't pinpoint the exact moment he knew he loved her. Desire had turned to love somewhere along the torturous years of waiting for her to return his feelings.

He raked a hand through his hair and sighed. "During the war, when you were just a baby. I would come and visit your Aunt Melly and your mother at Pittypat's. I knew then that I loved her."

The answer satisfied Wade and he beamed. "Thank you, Uncle Rhett."

He dashed out of the room as if he had been given life's greatest treasure. Rhett sighed again, shaking his head with an ironic grin on his lips. Rising to his feet he thought back to Wade's question.

When had he realized his feeling for Scarlett wasn't mere lust but love? It hadn't been right away. She had enchanted him yes, with her body and spirit. He remembered asking her once to become his mistress; it hadn't been then either. Perhaps it had been when she was nursing the wounded soldiers and he joked that she should run off with him. He had been deathly serious and would have whisked her away, but she hadn't wanted him.

He thought back to last night. Whistling lightly, he walked over to the desk and unconsciously began to straighten up the papers and stationary. While his mind wandered back to Scarlett.

Last night, had been one of the only times he had seen her vulnerable. She had opened herself to him and had offered her body as well as her mind without qualms. And for once, he was slowly admitting that perhaps they did have a chance to mend the broken pieces and have a second chance at life… Later, after the ball he would speak with her and see where they stood.

Frowning, a paper with small, neat writing addressed to Scarlett reached his eyes and he slowly read the letter.

_Dearest Scarlett,_

_Your letters have been my salvation and Beau's as well these past few months. I thought I would die without Melly. But you, my dearest gave me hope again to live in the hopes that you will return to Atlanta._

_I think back to when I was in Europe and you would send me your gay letters-full of mischief and news that would make me smile. Times have changed but your sweet demeanor and caring heart have not, my dear. I anxiously await your impending return. _

_Yours truly,_

_Ashley Wilkes_

This letter before him staggered Rhett. And he felt anger wash over him and the bitter taste of betrayal. So Scarlett had been writing the wooden headed Ashley Wilkes for months had she? He crumpled the letter in his hand and released it, trying to regain control.

It was obvious that Ashley still entertained thoughts about Scarlett, more then friendly thoughts too. No doubt Scarlett was enjoying the attention and he wondered how could he have been such a fool? Her declarations of love and fidelity meant nothing. Once again her words were empty and meaningless.

A dark look crossed his face and he laughed harshly at himself and the whole situation. She had played him well to the last minute. Well, she wouldn't win this round, he would see to that. Still, he thought of storming into their room to confront her but pride stopped him.

No, he would play her at her own game. Closing his eyes briefly he sighed, trying to get a hold of his emotions. Then opened them once again with an odd look in their dark depths. The same blank look he carried like a mask. The calm and cool look that could deceive anyone but he was not calm or cool. He furious with Scarett and himself as he strode out of the office.

TBC 


	34. A Disaster

Note: A huge thank you to all my 10 reviewers. As you can tell, I have become lazy and have quit mentioning everyone's name  (bad me) but I remember you all and this chapter is to you. I hope you enjoy and please review.

Part 34

The sudden change in Rhett's mood as they arrived at Hibernian Hall was obvious. All three women who sat in the confines of the carriage with Rhett could sense the tension and brooding look in his dark eyes. A look that had been absent for sometime, especially after his accident.

Scarlett's merry mood was dampened by the unexpected change. But she decided to be upbeat so she chattered and kept her voice bright. Perhaps if she smiled enough at Rhett and encouraged him to speak, he would be in a better mood.

"Rhett, I will be mighty mad if you don't give me the first and last dance," she playfully teased.

The look he shot her could have pierced ice.

"If I don't have prior engagements," he curtly said, but he smirked, thus one couldn't tell if he were joking or utterly serious.

Her smiled faded as she stared at him. No longer was he looking at her and she felt her heart plummet and become cold in her chest. Rhett was purposely being cruel and doing a wonderful job at covering it up, for Eleanor and Rosemary seemed to not notice anything was amiss.

Rosemary snickered. "Of course Rhett will probably keep you all to himself. Both of you will be the talk of the ball…"

Everyone in the carriage couldn't know how true that would be…

XXX

Having taken such pains to perfect her hair into a neat coiffure, Scarlett knew she looked breathtaking. The sea-foam colored dress she wore contrasted against her pale skin to perfection and was fitted tightly, emphasizing her waist and the line of her legs. So, why then when Rhett and her had been so close last night, did he pointedly ignore her?

Craning her neck, without trying to be too obvious, she saw Rhett across the room. He had a drink in his hand and seemed to down it. Next to him was a brunette woman who was far from homely. Hot, jealously coursed through her since Rhett was her husband and was doing a hell of a job fulfilling the role as the attentive husband.

The gradual strain of music filled her ears and partners made move to the white and black tiled floor. The chandelier cast a glow above the room and across. The night would have been magical if she didn't feel like her heart was breaking. Briefly, she thought of excusing herself but when she saw Rhett actually lean closer to the woman, she froze.

No, she wouldn't leave like a defeated coward. She would dance all the dances and have men eating out of her and by the end. Rhett would see that she wasn't so lovesick that she would let him walk over her. Wanting to give him a taste of his medicine, she turned and scanned the room, her eyes lingering on the first man who was under sixty but over twenty years of age.

Shooting the brown haired man a dazzling smile, she lowered her lashes and bit her lip as she saw him make move towards her. Stopping in front of her, she didn't have to tilt her head much for he was shorter then Rhett, yet there was a nice boyishness about him.

"I don't believe I have had the pleasure of meeting you," he grinned. "I am Grant Adams."

A smile played at the corners of her mouth. "Hello Mr. Adams. I am Mrs. Scarlett Butler."

At the mention of her marital status, a look of disappointment came in his eyes. "Ah, so I gather that you are saving your dances for your husband, Mr. Butler."

"Mr. Butler is occupied," she quickly said, placing her hand lightly on his arm. "As you can see I am without a dance partner and in dire straits."

His lips turned up into a smile. "Then shall we or should I fear your husband?" Offering his arm, she took it and they began their walk to the floor. She kept her eyes focused on him as if he were the most fascinating man on the earth.

"Rhett is harmless," she assured him as another waltz began. Taking her in his arms, Scarlett was pleased to find that Mr. Adams was an accomplished dancer. Not as light on his feet as Rhett was but he didn't step on her feet.

As she turned, she would catch quick glances at Rhett. He was watching them, and she felt triumph until offered his arm to the brunette and led the brunette to the floor and she saw him take her in his arms, too close to be proper.

"Mrs. Butler."

She was jerked back to the present to see Mr. Adams staring at her with concern. "Are you quite all right?"

"Y-yes, I am," she lied with a forced smile. Although she felt like she was going to throw up and her heart was oddly constricted.

A few more moments of pleasantries passed between them but Scarlett barely heard, since she was so focused on Rhett. The cad seemed to be enjoying himself and laughed rather loudly as he animatedly talked to the woman.

As the waltz ended, she was led back to the side and he kissed her hand, yet she was barely conscious as she mumbled customary responses and he left. Forcing herself to act, Scarlett went with a vengeance, attracting any man near her with her charm until they were nearly lined up to dance with her.

Thank heavens for her stamina, she couldn't help but think. For all these years since her first ball, she had been able to dance for hours without feeling tired. And partner after partner led her out for dances. Until, she took a brief break and Rosemary made her way towards Scarlett.

"Scarlett, why hasn't Rhett danced with you?" she worriedly whispered. "People are starting to talk…"

"Ask your brother," she crisply said, sighing and turning her head. "I am going to dance…"

"But Scarlett…"

Ignoring her, Scarlett wordlessly nodded as a man offered his arm and she went out once again to the floor. Out of the corner of her eyes, she could still see Rosemary watching her with a frown on her face. But she didn't give a damn.

"You are Mrs. Butler, are you not?" the man asked her in a crisp voice.

Turning her eyes to his, she smiled and saw his lips also draw to a smile under his thick moustache.

"I certainly am unless if there is another woman who looks like me."

He shook his head. "Indeed no! No woman is more divine then you that I have seen. No woman that could match your beauty."

Briefly, her eyes sparkled. "Are you a poet or a womanizer?"

Throwing back his head, he laughed. "You are a delight, Mrs. Butler. It has been a pleasure to dance with you and bask in the presence of such a strong, vivacious spirit."

Despite the compliments that were thrown out her, Scarlett couldn't be happy. She felt no triumph or satisfaction for her feat. Only an utter weariness and sadness seemed to envelope her as she went back to her place, glad to see Rosemary was gone.

Rhett was across the room and might as well been a million miles away. Luckily women were absent from being at his side for now. Never one to beat around the bush for long, she clenched her jaw and decided it was high time she confronted him.

Taking measured steps, she crossed the room. As always, Rhett didn't miss anything and gave her a pointed look as her steps drew her closer and closer until she was right next to him and leaned over, near his ear.

"What are you doing?" she hissed.

He shrugged. "What does it look like? I am enjoying myself and getting slopping drunk."

"But why?" she demanded. "Rhett, why are you acting this way-after last night? I thought-"

"Oh, that? Call it a lapse in judgment or a mistake. Which ever suits you better."

She felt as if the breath had been knocked out of her. A mistake? But it hadn't been a mistake! At least, he had said he wouldn't regret it. The anger was visible on her face.

"The only thing would suit me is you getting out of my sight."

Her voice had been calm and controlled, but as she turned, her legs were far from in control. She could feel them shaking beneath her and felt close to loosing it. What she really wanted to do was rush home and lay face down and cry. But pride kept her from doing so, and she smiled an almost sick smile towards Eleanor who was watching her with alert eyes.

Wanting desperately to be alone, she knew she couldn't. The things she couldn't help, she had to bear. So, she remained standing straight and proud with a fake smile on her lips. The picture of serenity while inside she was seething.

"Are you having an enjoyable time, Mrs. Butler?" an old crone asked her.

"Why, of course!" Scarlett cheerfully lied, yet swiping away at a few stray tears. "This is simply one of the best balls I have been to."

"It is absolutely wonderful how you saved your husband," the old woman continued, totally oblivious. "How heroic and brave…"

"I wish he would have drowned," she darkly muttered.

"What?" the old woman asked. "Please speak up dear."

Taking in a deep breath, she smiled sweetly. "I said I would have been heart broken had anything happened to him." Yet the words were gritted out. Luckily the woman didn't notice. Yet, Scarlett couldn't help but think, _Oh, I wish she'd go away._

As if providence would have it, the last dance was announced. The evening was coming to a close where there would be one last waltz. Foolishly, Scarlett's eyes scanned the room for Rhett, hoping that he would come to her. He made no effort to.

With a sickening feeling, she saw the woman Rhett went to. It was Sally Bright and he led her to the floor. It had been the last dance, their last chance to dance together. Rhett couldn't have planned it any better if he had slapped her across the face.

Despite trying to control the welling emotions, tears filled her eyes and nearly choked her. Through her lashes, she saw Mrs. Brown making her way towards her and she wanted to flee but Mrs. Brown firmly rooted herself in front of Scarlett, her eyes pointed.

"Your husband should be dancing with you," Mrs. Brown said. "If you had any sense Scarlett Butler you would take action and march right up there."

"I can't," she whispered. "Just go away."

"No," the woman adamantly said, her gray eyes unrelenting. "I never knew you were a coward."

If that was one thing, Scarlett couldn't stand being called was coward. As if the tears had magically stopped, her eyes blazed.

"I am no coward."

A feeling of power rushed over her. Going to the punch table, she filled a cup and took a sip. Brushing past Mrs. Brown she marched right out onto the dance floor, interrupting dancers by stepping in their paths. The confused looks on their faces were evident and the music had stopped.

She saw Sally Bright's golden hair and her painted ruby lips upturned in a smirk as she approached. And Scarlett hated her as much as she hated Rhett at that moment. Wishing she could throw something at his mocking dark head.

Coming to a halt in front of Rhett and Sally Bright, she smiled sweetly. The picture of innocence although what she was about to do wasn't so innocent.

"Hello darling, enjoying your evening?"

"Scarlett…"

"Because I certainly am not," she cut in. Then she poured her glass all over Sally Bright's dress. A startled shriek came from her lips as she jumped back and Rhett stared at his wife as if she had just grown horns, the twisted look on his face was priceless.

"I am finished, Rhett," she continued, her voice growing stronger. "You two deserve each other. I might not be a saint but at least I have the gall not to make myself look like a fool. You really are a fool, Rhett Butler."

Turning on her heel, she slowly made her grand exit out to the hall. Whispers sounded in the room but she ignored them until she reached outside and took great, gasping breaths, knowing Rhett would soon be following her outside.

TBC


	35. The Gazebo

Note: Thanks for all the lovely reviews. I wrote this scene forever ago but of course am always hesitant to post this type of scene. It is definitely RATED M and probably not very accurate with the clothing and stuff, but please ignore that. And yes, Scarlett is leaving Charleston the next chapter, so many of you, who might have been thinking, "Can she leave that old boring place already?" will be pleased, hopefully. Enjoy and please review. Also a special thanks to missysammy who asked me the other day when I would be continuing.

Part 35

Rhett watched Scarlett flee the ballroom. Her posture was as erect as always and she didn't run, but slowly walked away, but with a purposeful stride that showed him she was angry and hurt. He didn't know what had fueled him to so blatantly humiliate her by dancing with Sally.

But, yes he couldn't lie to himself. He did know-jealousy. He was a fool and lying to himself and to Scarlett. Still, even saying he didn't love her, with the feelings of passion driving him, he was jealous.

Sally was still riled, her face red in anger. She was pale as where Scarlett was dark. Scarlett was passionate and had a fire that drove him to her. All Sally had was sarcasm and an indignation at being drenched in punch. Publicly humiliated by none other then his feisty wife. Even he had found the exchange entertaining.

He had never slept with Sally but she had made it clear she was willing. At first he had no intention of doing so and after last night he had been certain him and Scarlett had another chance. By her act, he now looked like the cad of a husband but she wasn't blameless either. The old hurt rolled in him that she still wanted the wooden headed Ashley Wilkes.

"Please excuse me, Sally," he crisply said to hide his feelings of confusion that Scarlett had given him. She stiffly nodded but he could see the frustration in her eyes. The only pressing thought was finding Scarlett. He knew she would explode once she saw him but he knew he had to seek her out and somehow appease her anger. What a pretty mess he was in.

Turning on his heel he left the silent room. Going out into the dimly lit hall, he didn't see Scarlett nowhere in sight. Indeed it was empty for everyone was in the ballroom.

Walking further down the hall he came to the French doors that led out to the terrace and down to the lawn. It was quiet dark but he knew nothing had confined Scarlett inside before. Opening the door, he stepped out into the cool crisp air.

His steps were quick and purposeful as he walked across the terrace to the steps and descended onto the lawn and the pathway. He saw Scarlett in the distance. She was walking quickly away. Thinking of calling out to her but thought better of it, he didn't want to alert anyone's attention, as it was there was going to be talk about them tomorrow. He saw that she was going to the gazebo and wondered what she was up to.

Scant light was in the lawn but not very much from the lanterns. He squinted in the darkness and came to the white gazebo. Scarlett was standing on the first few steps. Her hands clenched. He could feel her anger.

He took a breath and he could see it in the cool air, raking a hand through his hair.

"Scarlett, listen to me-"

But she spun around, her eyes narrowing. She was more angry then he had ever seen her-even more so that fateful day at Twelve Oaks. Her chest heaved and her glove clad hands were clenched at her side as she advanced towards him, her lips nearly a snarl.

"No, you listen to me. You brute! How could you dance with that creature when you knew how I felt? Do you know how it feels to be stabbed Rhett? You brutally humiliated me. Damn you!"

The clouds shifted that moment and her face was illuminated by moonlight. He saw the tears on her pale cheeks. He felt like a heel and the worst person for hurting her. He had been driven, as he always was when it came to Scarlett. Yet, he pushed aside the guilt and dryly laughed.

"Pot calling the kettle black. You played me a fool. For all your flowery speeches, you never loved me, my pet. You were carrying on with Ashley this whole time."

"Now you are trying to blame me?" she asked through gritted teeth. "The gall of you. Always blaming others for your shortcomings. You are pathetic and a foolish man, Rhett."

"You wrote Ashley Wilkes a number of occasions," he accused. "Deny it, Scarlett."

He saw the surprise in her eyes. He knew she wouldn't deny it. God, he was still jealous of that wooden headed Ashley Wilkes. He wanted to strangle her and for that reason he loathed the power she still had over him. To his dying day he would always want her, which was the crux of his problem. But now he dared her to admit she didn't love him, and then he could wash his hands of her and be free from her.

"I won't deny it," she laughingly said. "You are jealous of Ashley. That's rich coming from a man who claims not to love or want me. Yes, Rhett, you are right. I am madly in love with Ashley. I was playing you a fool. The whole time I only wanted your body and money. How could I love a cad like you?"

He had got the admission that she hadn't loved him. But the feeling of relief he had expected didn't come. But hot anger from the past and because of the woman standing before him. God, he wanted her and the same time, she was like the angel of death. He felt angry and his jaw clenched.

"How does it feel, Rhett?" she continued, her voice mocking. "Knowing that I only want your body and money-not you?"

"Stop it, Scarlett," he warned. "Don't make me do something we both regret."

She moved past him, making way back towards the door when his hand caught her arm in a deafening grip, he spun her to face him His face was dark and shadowed. But she wouldn't fear him; he could see it in her narrowed eyes.

"You don't scare me anymore," she said. "You once cornered and frightened me. You were bigger then me and stronger. But not now." Suddenly she disentangled her arm from his grasp and stepped back. The light from the window monetarily lit up her and he could see her eyes glittering with fire.

"But I want you. I'll give you a divorce as long as you give me money and- yourself. Have I shocked the mighty Rhett Butler? Well, I'm damned tired of staying quiet and letting what I want go by. But I shan't let you touch me while you are dallying with that creature under my nose-"

Her voice had begun to rise in anger and before Rhett could control his actions, he grabbed her around the waist and brought her body hard against his. He moved forward, her body against his and his arms tightly around her in a steel grip. She let out a cry of surprise at his lighting motions as they moved further back into the shadows of the gazebo, from the last light and sight of the windows and of people.

He pressed her hard against the railing of the gazebo, his thighs against hers. Now he was stronger then her and she knew she should fight him. Rhett knew he would regret this later but he had to have her one last time and desire and anger fueled him to hold her tightly against him. His hands moved through her soft hair, the pins falling out as he held her face captive with his hand. His face came down, his lips hard and bruising. Suddenly it was as if everything burst and he felt her reserve and restrictions melting.

Scarlett was clutching his shoulders, her hands moving sensually over his back as she gave into this demand. Returning his bruising kiss, her lips eagerly meeting his. She knew her mother would be rolling around in her grave and there was the risk of people seeing them but she didn't care. Clutching him to her, her hands moving across the wide expanse of his covered back, anger fueling her actions.

The smell of perfume that clung to her of rose water was his undoing. The deep anger was still in the pit of his stomach and he could feel the anger in her body pressed hard against his. Suddenly his hands were under her skirt, on her bare thighs. He could feel the smoothness of her skin and the heat. She let out a gasp as he pushed up her skirts further and lifted her so that she was hard against the wall and her legs were around his hips.

He grabbed her hands that were clutching his shoulders and pulled off her gloves, watching her eyes. He wouldn't be gentle or reserved as if had been with her their whole marriage. God, he wanted her more then he could remember ever wanting her. She was kissing him still, now returning his ardor. It wasn't just him as it had been that night all those years ago, she met him stroke for stroke and passion with passion.

Once again, in the few times he had known Scarlett, Rhett wasn't even in control of his own actions. His head pounded and the feel of her pliant lips under his made his hands move to her legs that were fasted around his waist and pull her tighter against him if it were possible. He was kissing her in earnest, his thighs firmly pressed against hers. Holding her captive by his body against the railing, his lips moving to her bare throat. Her pulse thudded against his lips, signifying that she was as equally affected and her head fell back to give him better access.

"Rhett," she breathed. This sound of her name on his lips made him monetarily pause. The shadow of Ashley Wilkes had always been around them. Of her imaging Ashley holding her while he had been and of her saying his name in her dreams. But not this time, this time it was his name on her lips, as it had been the last few times. And he gloried in it.

It wasn't enough playing with fire. Both had to have each other, last night seemed like ages ago. He pushed her skirts further up, almost savagely and she in kind shifted against him. His hands were under her skirts and he disentangled her legs from his momentarily and set her on the ground. She swayed and he smiled at the effect he had on her. Rhett kneeled down and pushed her skirts up, removing the barriers between them; glad she wasn't wearing a corset.

On her own accord and a move that surprised both of them, her hands went to the waist band of his trousers when he rose to his full height... She was trying to undo them with shaky hands but he merely smiled as he aided her. He saw the desire mirrored in her eyes. Rhett had always wanted to see her desire him, and now that she did, like a starved child he greedily took what was offered. There was no turning back and he didn't want to.

Then they were free of any restrictions as he pushed her hard against the wall and she gasped again. He wasn't sure if it were the surprise or thrill at the strength and the force he exerted. His eyes were on her face as he finally thrust into her. She gasped, her head falling back. Only then did he come back to reality. He felt fear sweep over him at her expression. God, he really was a savage animal to take her so forcefully. Had he hurt her?

"Scarlett, are you all right?" he asked, his voice sounding even strange to his own ears.

She silently nodded. But her face was strained and her eyes unlike anything he had ever seen before. He made move to withdraw but she clutched him to her, her legs wrapping back around his hips.

"No," she protested, her eyes boring into his. "Don't stop."

Her nails dug into his shoulders as they began to move in earnest. She cried out his name as she was clutched him to her, moving her thighs against his and drawing him nearer to her with her legs. Groaning against her mouth, she drew him deeper. She was kissing his neck when he thrust into her again, a cry emerging from her lips as well as she sank her teeth into his skin.

The feel of her teeth against his shoulder made him pause in surprise for a moment. She arched her back in response. This only fueled his movements and they became harder and faster. He was driven to posses her and to take the pleasure she offered. The anger had faded to a pressing desire. He could hear his own ragged breathing and hers echoing his. Rhett didn't feel the cold against his skin from the December night air as he drove them to heights faster, where pleasure waited at the next turn. It was only Scarlett against him.

Her cries intensified in his ears so loudly, any other time he may have gone deaf but were joined with the thudding of his heart. He caught her cries with his mouth, his tongue probing her parted mouth and dueling with hers in movement with heir bodies.

Finally, it was as if everything burst and shattered within them both. Scarlett let out a cry that was muffled against his mouth. Her head fell back. He knew she was almost at the peak and he thrust one last time into her. She reached the heights of pleasure and the tide took them both. He slumped against her and the wall supported them, her legs still held fast around him.

Rhett didn't know how long he was in the state. Scarlett was held tightly against him and he stroked her hair. His throat buried her face. He realized he wanted to stay like this forever but they couldn't. But he became aware of what they had done and after the pleasure came the steady rise of self-loathing. How could he have taken Scarlett outside of all places and forcefully? Anger and desire had gotten the better of him. He saw her become aware of what had transpired. She turned her head from his gaze and dropped her legs from around him, stumbling on shaky legs. He tried to aid her but she pulled away.

Her hand went to her mouth and she stared at him with wide eyes. "What did I do?"

"Scarlett..."

"I-I'm not some whore that you can use," she said shakily. "But you always take what you want, don't you? Just like the night of…" She trailed off but pressed her lips together. "We have a deal and I still intend to give you a divorce. I'm buying a train back to Atlanta tomorrow for the children and me."

That cooled any pleasure her had felt right away. Harsh reality set back in. He buttoned his waistband. Finally he looked at her. The raven hair was mussed and her eyes appeared darker then usual. Her face had looked peaceful and beautiful during their lovemaking and followed but now her jaw was clenched. The tears he saw in her eyes staggered him. Feeling guilt and shame as he made move towards her.

But fear came into her eyes and something else-hurt. She turned on her heel and fled before he could reach her. He made move after her as she was stumbled away. God, he felt like a fool as he sighed and sat down to compose himself before he went back in. He was a fool, for Scarlett O'Hara was still in his blood. Watching her leave, he knew there was nothing he could do or say. Bitterly, he knew if he told her he loved her that she would stay. But he couldn't lie to himself or to her. The truth was, he didn't love her.

TBC


	36. Visitors

Note: Many of you didn't expect last chapter.. Not sure if it was a good or bad thing but I am still currently not sure where I am going with this story past a certain point. Thank you for the lovely reviews and here is the next part. Enjoy and please review, especially if any have opinions in where they would like to see this story go.

Part 36

The mutinous line that was slashed across Scarlett's ruby lips was a telltale sign that she was angry. The train seemed to flash past all the scenery in a blur until everything blended together in one sickening dream. Her stomach hurt and her jaw was clenched to control the pain.

Even Wade and Ella had fallen silent, sensing one of her moods. For a long while the moods had been absent but they had returned in full force. Especially when Ella kept tapping her fingers against the glass.

"Stop that Ella!" Scarlett snapped.

Ella's head snapped around so surprised by her mother's sudden outburst. Wade also stared at her. The tears that filled Ella's hazel eyes made her feel briefly guilty but she looked away, sighing. Placing her hands on her pounding temples, she thought of the agony it had been to leave Eleanor and Rosemary…

_"Oh, Scarlett?" Rosemary mourned. "Must you go? I know you and Rhett had a disagreement, but surely…"_

_Shaking her head, Scarlett sighed. "Are you really that naïve, Rosemary? Rhett and I have been in disagreement for ages. He doesn't want me here."_

_"My bull headed son loves you," Eleanor added in a calm voice, silent during the exchange. "I know he does even if he is being stubborn."_

_Scarlett had forgotten Eleanor's presence. The voice was soothing and soft like Ellen's and she felt herself precariously close to tears. And when Eleanor embraced her, only then would she let herself cry but the tears wouldn't come. She had used them all the night before in the guest bedroom… alone._

_"You two seemed so happy together," Eleanor told her daughter-in-law. "What happened?"_

_Scarlett laughed bitterly. "Rhett and I have never been happy. We have only given the illusion of it." She looked away. "I don't want to burden you with Rhett and my problems…"_

_"You know I will always be here if you need me. Be brave, my dear and everything will work out," continued Eleanor, patting her cheek. "I promise I shall write you every week and you will keep in touch, won't you?"_

_Both these women cared for her and she didn't know what she would have done without them. How she would have survived had they not been here._

_"Yes, I promise," she softly said, with feeling. All the women embraced each other in tears._

The memories shifted in her mind and she could still see Rhett's form as the train had left the depot. He had been standing there with his hands shoved deep in his pockets…

"_Boarding!" the harsh voice rang through the depot as the engine started, signifying the train was ready for departure. People walked and rushed forward, waving and kissing loved ones good-bye._

_It seemed appropriate that the children lunged forward and hugged Rhett in a tight embrace. There was a momentary sadness and sobering look that seemed to pass in Rhett's eyes before it was wiped clean._

_Ruffling Wade's hair he murmured something and then turned to Ella. She clung to him and was crying. Turning away, Scarlett felt bitter that Ella could openly hang on him and cry. What she wanted to do was cry, but wouldn't give Rhett the satisfaction of seeing her cry._

_She felt incredibly cold inside. The sickening feeling she related to falling out of the tree at Tara when she was little. Always she related any type of pain to that, since that was the only staggering physical pain she had felt until the fall down the stairs._

"_There, now don't cry," Rhett soothed Ella._

"_But when will we see you again? Why aren't you coming back with us, Uncle Rhett?"_

_Patting her hair, he disentangled her hands from around his waist and shot Scarlett a look. "Ask your mother."_

_The look she shot him was fierce and could have melted ice. Even the memory of his embrace seemed like a dream. The passion she had felt and love had dwindled to fierce resentment, this showed clearly on her face._

_But he took a step nearer, because it was expected of him. Reaching out a hesitant hand towards her, she stiffened._

"_Don't touch me," she warned in a low voice. "Not when you don't mean it and you've touched her... You've come here to do your duty now you can go back to Halifax for all I care."_

_His hand dropped back to his side and he stiffly nodded. "I see… Take care of yourself Scarlett and the children."_

_Stiffly nodding her head, she grabbed Ella's hand. "I will."_

_Wade followed her as she walked to the train and showed the conductor their tickets. On an after thought she turned to Rhett and released Ella's hand, walking over to him._

"_I have one last thing to say to you Rhett Butler," she said with a breath. "I may be a bad mother but at least I never abandoned them." Her eyes burned holes into his. "Remember that, Rhett."_

"_Bitterness doesn't become you, Scarlett," he said in a serious voice._

_A mirthless laugh escaped her. "Doesn't it? I suppose you have yourself to thank for that."_

_He shrugged. "I told you I'd come and visit…"_

_The last call rang out and she said, "Don't bother coming. Just send me the divorce papers and the million dollars that we had agreed upon last night, unless you have forgotten our conversation."_

"_Your thirty pieces of silver," he mocked._

_Her eyes rove over his face with anger and bitterness. The planes and creases she had come to despise, love and then resent once again. They could have been terribly happy if he would have let them._

"_I never betrayed you though," she softly said, her face briefly softening and a look of pain crossing her eyes. But she quickly replaced it with a neutral look. Not bidding him good-bye, for she couldn't, she turned and went back to the children._

_Boarding, they quickly slipped into their seats. A window seat in which she could clearly see Rhett. And she couldn't bear watching him walk away. Yet, he stood there, scanning the windows until he saw her and their eyes held._

_Some unspoken words spoke between them before she felt her throat close up and she turned her head away. The train began to move and at last she stared at him one last time, a brief nod was given from him, his hands shoved deep in his pocket as he turned and walked away._

_Feeling the tears finally come, she mouthed, "Rhett…" placing her hand fleetingly on the glass as if she could touch him._

XXX

Lying in her massive bed, Scarlett listlessly stared out the window from her pillow. It was noon and she had only arrived hours before in Atlanta. Still dressed fully in her mourning gown with only her shoes kicked off on the floor. Trying to imagine what it was like before she had kicked Rhett out of her bed.

She remembered the feel of his body next to hers and the way he would hold her against his broad chest. At that moment, she could swear she smelt the comforting smell of brandy and cigars-that smell that she had always associated with her father and Rhett.

Her mouth turned down. Noticing that she was becoming fanciful in her thinking as of late. Perhaps it was being back in the house that brought back memories. Wanting to imagine all was well. That Melanie hadn't died, Rhett hadn't rejected her and Bonnie wasn't dead…

Thank heavens Cookie was entertaining the children. As it was, she had to almost forcefully keep Wade from rushing off to see Beau. It was too hard to think of seeing Ashley and Beau. Both a part of Melly that would no doubt bring memories. And that horrid house that hadn't been fit enough to hold Melanie and the one in which she had died in. Melanie had looked so small lying on the bed…

And unbidden came the images of Bonnie lying dead in her small bed. Then the mist came and she wasn't sure if it was reality or a dream until she woke up, her legs tangled and Cookie standing over her with a worried look.

"What is it, Cookie?" she hoarsely asked, sitting up. "Are the children…"

"They are fine, Miss Scarlett."

"Oh, thank God!"

The black face searched hers. "Ya were having a nightmare and callin' for…"

"Never mind about that," Scarlett cut in, not wanting to hear their names, placing her feet on the floor and getting up. "What do you need?"

"Well Miss Scarlett, Mrs. Merriweather, Mrs. Elsing and Mrs. Meade are here to see you."

"They are?" she asked thoughtfully and with some trepidation. Going to the mirror, she looked awful. The color she had regained in Charleston had seemed to dissipate and now left staring back at her was a sickly looking ninny. Turning back to Cookie, she arched her brow.

"Where are the children?"

"Miss Ella is in de nursery and Mistah Wade is in de backyard."

"Very well. Go tell them I will receive them in the parlor momentarily and bring a tray of tea."

Cookie did as she bid and Scarlett patted down her hair, smoothing her wrinkled gown. Really, she should have changed and should at least look decent, well groomed. Sadly, she couldn't conjure any desire to play the part anymore of the dazzling Scarlett Butler. In Charleston she had cared somewhat but now left was the bad taste in her mouth of utter dullness, a world with little color or gaiety.

Slipping on her shoes, she left the room. The hall was still as she soundlessly walked across the carpet to the landing of the stairs. Clutching the railing tighter unconsciously, she held her train in one hand and came to the bottom, heading directly to the parlor.

She saw the old crones: Mrs. Merriwether, Mrs. Meade and Mrs. Elsing. They were standing as straight and proud as a cat, ready to pounce on its prey. She didn't mind Mrs. Meade too much. But Mrs. Merriwether and Mrs. Elsing! They were two of a kind. Both fat old cats that would surely gossip after they noticed Rhett's absence.

They were looking around the ornate house with looks of awe and horror. She couldn't blame them, though they were old busy bodies that were looking around the house to find anything unusual. Not that they would find anything though. Except for the dark gloomy interior of the house.

There were days when Scarlett even wondered why she had even wanted this house. All the memories lingered around, turning this sinister house into a nightmare.

The women's mourning gowns were outlandish with yards of crepe that showed how old the gowns were.

"Mrs. Merriwether, Mrs. Meade, Mrs. Elsing," Scarlett said nodding politely in greeting. "What brings you here?"

"Good morning, Scarlett," Mrs. Merriwether stiffly said.

"Morning," Mrs. Elsing coldly followed suit.

Scarlett smoothed the skirts of her mourning gown distractedly as she smiled. "Would you care for tea?" she asked as she looked at the women's shocked faces_. "They probably thought I wouldn't have aske_d," she thought but forced a strained smile.

She hoped her breath didn't smell like brandy. Maybe she had consumed more then she had thought since arriving for she could still taste it on the tongue hours later.

"That's quite alright, Scarlett," Mrs. Merriwether answered for all three of them as she glared at Mrs. Meade, not letting her speak. Scarlett watched in amusement as she bit on her lower lip to keep from laughing.

"Is there something I can do for you both?"

Mrs. Elsing only glared at her, not wanting to be indebted to anyone especially Scarlett O'Hara. Mrs. Elsing's refusal to speak caused Mrs. Merriwether to do so.

"Scarlett I feel as if I were your mother. And I must tell you that you must watch over yourself. Under these circumstances I feel you should stay away from…"

"Ashley," Scarlett angrily finished as she stood up and glared at Mrs. Merriwether and Mrs. Elsing, who looked as if they agreed. "If you must know Mrs. Merriwether I have no intention of staying away from Ashley! I loved Melanie and she made me promise to take care of Ashley and Beau. And I will!"

"Now, Scarlett I didn't mean to pry. I only feel it is my duty as a Christian woman and one of your mothers dearest friends. Rest her soul. She would be concerned for your well being as I am, dear…" Mrs. Merriwether explained. "Where ever are your charming children?"

"They are resting."

"And how about Captain Butler?"

Scarlett froze as she heard Rhett's name. "Well… He had business to attend to in Charleston and promised he would join us later."

"My dear," Mrs. Merriwether continued. "I feel it's my duty to tell you to stay away from Ashley until Captain Butler comes home. We don't want any more gossip. Poor Ashley, he had handled more than he can bear."

"I wouldn't have Ashley on a platter anymore then I'd have you at my own funeral!" Scarlett snapped. "Let them talk, I say! I won't suffer because fat old buffalos like yourself don't have enough chivalry to keep your mouths shut. I have suffered enough of all your deceitful gossip. I shan't stand it any longer! Leave now."

"Well! I never thought I would here you conduct your self in such a deceitful way, Scarlett O'Hara! It was bad enough you married a Scalawag and chased after Ashley Wilkes… God will set judgment upon you. I only hope you will be forgiven…" Mrs. Merriwether said briskly as her face turned red with indignation.

"My name is Scarlett Butler and not O'Hara," she countered with clenched fists. "And furthermore you won't speak of my husband that way! He isn't anymore a Scalawag than you are a Christian!"

"Oh! That is enough out of you young lady! Our calling is over now, Mrs. Elsing. We shall never call here again. I will forgive you Scarlett but I can't find the sympathy to do it just yet." With not even a nod, Mrs. Merriwether trudged over towards the door as Mrs. Elsing stayed behind with a fuming glare.

"I have been waiting to tell you what I thought of you Scarlett O'Hara. Melanie had kept me quiet for years! And now she isn't here to save you and cloak your sins from the eyes of God! You will pay dearly for all the pain you have inflicted upon the goodness of people. You don't deserve forgiveness.

"You are only a flighty spoiled brat that doesn't deserve happiness. I am surprised that Captain Butler is still married to you! You haven't a heart and he has. You were rotten to him after his darling daughter died! It nearly killed him but did you have mercy? No! You didn't give him the time in the day. An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth!" With all that said, Mrs. Elsing scowled at Scarlett with all the hatred she possessed and left, slamming the parlor door behind her.

To Scarlett the hateful words were like a slap to her face. She couldn't ignore the words nor laugh at them to make them go away. Sinking onto the plush settee; she had never felt so lonely and empty. Mrs. Elsing was right; she had been awful to Rhett. But was it true she didn't deserve forgiveness or happiness? For she could never imagine being happy again.

Wanting to reach the sanctuary of her room. And she did, falling onto the bed. But the tears wouldn't come. So many emotions over took her. Wanting to laugh, cry, scream and throw things. But most of all she wanted another drink.

Crawling forward, she grabbed her glass of brandy and downed it, not caring that some of the contents dribbled onto her coverlet. Swiping her mouth with the back of her hand, she froze as she heard another knock on her door.

Thinking of ignoring it, she poured herself another glass and knew she was getting tipsier by each cup. The knocking intensified.

"Miss Scarlett."

It was Cookie. With a sigh, Scarlett set down her glass and bid her to come in. The door opened and Cookie entered.

"Der is a visitor downstairs, Miss Scarlett."

"Tell them to go away," she ordered. "I'm busy…" But interest got the better of her. "Well, who is it?"

"It is Mistah Ashley."

TBC


	37. A Visit from Ashley Wilkes

Note: Thanks for the reviews. Here is the next chapter and to answer one of the questions/comments posed, actually I will have a future chapter with Rhett's thoughts but I'm afraid I just got done writing it and that won't be until chapter 46, which is quite a ways away. So we won't hear from Rhett again until chapter 41 briefly and chapter 44. Then 46 will be all him!

Also missysammy, I took your advice and will have Eleanor and Rosemary come to Atlanta in the future. Thank you all and please enjoy! Reviews are always welcomed.

Part 37

It wasn't love that made Scarlett scramble to her feet, her hand going to her chest in a flurry. If Ashley had just arrived that meant that the old buffalos had probably passed him on their way out. One thing she didn't need is any gossip that would somehow confirm Rhett's suspicions.

"He's here?" Going to the mirror, she saw she looked even more awful then she had imagined. Her gown was wrinkled and her face drawn. She simply couldn't let Ashley see her this way! Call it pride but she had always looked her best in his presence, and that wasn't going to change now just because she wasn't in love with him.

"Cookie, hurry and help me. Go fetch me my chocolate colored gown in the closet, the one with the high bustle and flower at the shoulder."

Cookie went to do her bidding and she sunk on her bed, a speculating look in her eyes. She wondered why Ashley was downstairs. Her correspondence with him hadn't certainly announced her arrival since it had been sudden. For some odd reason she felt nervous, as if he would truly see her. The unhappiness and agony she felt, well she just wouldn't let on.

But more frightening then that, she couldn't help but think as she stood up for Cookie to help her. Was the fear she would see his pain and her own would come flooding back. As the dress slipped over her head and she rose up her arms, she left Cookie to look in the mirror. Indeed, she looked better but not quite good enough, especially her hair.

Grabbing her brush, she gave it a few quick, good strokes. "I'll wear it down today," she told Cookie. "Go tell Mistha Ashley I will be right down. And send a tray of tea and pastries to the parlor…"

Once Cookie had left, Scarlett put on a dab of cologne on her wrist and patted some on her neck. Also and she knew what would have been to Mammy's horror, she pinched her cheeks roughly. But when color failed to appear, she settled for her jar of rogue and powered some lightly on her cheeks. Certainly she looked better and a slight smile came to her lips of satisfaction.

Leaving her room, she headed for the parlor the second time today. The house was as still as ever but she could hear the strain of Ella's voice as she played dolls by herself in the nursery. After Bonnie's death Rhett had barred its use but since he wasn't here, Scarlett had given her permission for Ella to play there.

Unconsciously, she held her locket in her hand as she came to the parlor. Entering, Ashley was sitting down but immediately rose to his feet at seeing her, a small, weak smile coming to his lips. But what drew Scarlett were his eyes.

They burned with an inner fire that had often been in own her eyes. She couldn't place where she had seen that look but shrugged it off.

"Ashley," she warmly said, going over to him with her hand offered.

He took them and kissed them almost reverently but Scarlett didn't notice this as she smiled happily up at him. One of the first genuine smiles on her face since the disaster at St. Cecilia's.

"Scarlett, my dear. You look as beautiful as ever."

Biting her lip, she felt a sudden flood of emotion. But looked away, not wanting him to see her as weak. It was as if time had played a cruel trick and had taken away how they had used to be. Twelve long years ago, both had thought their life had been promising but it had turned out to be hell.

It remained unspoken that Melanie should have been there. The heart-shaped face should have been adoringly looking at Ashley and glowing with happiness. Melanie should have been there, sitting before her and sipping tentatively on tea while she rambled about the cause. True, Scarlett hadn't listened but she would have now.

"You're still the worst liar, Ashley Wilkes," Scarlett chided as she sat down on the settee. "But do sit down next to me and tell me how things have been since I left..."

Ashley sat beside her and she was vaguely surprised when he took one of her hands in his. She couldn't quite place her finger on it but there was something different in the way he was acting and how he was looking at her…

"The whole town continues to mourn for… Melly. Mrs. Merriweather, Mrs. Elsing and Mrs. Meade continue to fight for the cause even more so now since Melly…" he trailed off. "India is harsher somehow, I don't know what happened to her sweetness and innocence Scarlett but she's as hard as nails. Her brutality surprises me sometimes."

"Oh, India?" Scarlett asked with a shrug. "She has always been as hard as nails since I took her beau from her. But how is Aunt Pitty and Uncle Peter?"

A sad smile tilted his thin lips. "As if the world had come to an end and an era has passed."

Before, Scarlett couldn't have understood Ashley's ramblings. But she suddenly realized that Melanie had taken an era with her, passing along with her in her death. An era of gentility and the virtues Ellen had possessed, the virtues she wished she could attain. A deep loss settled over her and she had to hold the tears in once again by toying with her sleeve. Face hardening, she bit her lip.

Perhaps Ashley had noticed her distress for his hand in hers became warmer and his grasp tighter.

"Is Captain Butler home?" he asked, his gray eyes hesitant.

At the mention of Rhett's name, a feeling of new grief and loss washed over her. The emotions must have crossed over her face for Ashley stared at her with kind, wistful eyes.

"No, he's in Charleston still," she evasively replied. "But he will return soon."

The brightness in her voice was fake and they both knew it. Scarlett had the insane desire to tell him how awful it was between her and Rhett. But pride kept it in and she couldn't bear for Ashley to think badly of Rhett and feel pity for her. All would say she deserved it or rant about how many husbands' she had lost. But she hadn't lost Rhett and would never let anyone know that he had left her. Yet, she knew everyone sensed it, even Ashley though dim-witted, wasn't stupid in those matters but perceptible to her moods and emotions.

"Scarlett," he gently and hesitantly asked. "Are you and Rhett having problems?"

"Why would you ever say that, Ashley?" she playfully asked. "Fiddle-dee-dee, since when have you known Captain Butler and me to ever have problems?"

His eyes were questioning and she looked away, feeling unnerved.

"Has he hurt you?" he pressed. "In your letters, you seemed so happy to… be with him."

"Is this an interview?" she tightly asked. "Please, Ashley, I don't want to speak about… Rhett."

Ashley shook his head with an ironic smile on his lips. "Darling, I have to know if he hurt you, because by God if he did…"

"No," she stiffly said. "I hurt myself. Rhett had nothing to do with it. It's my fault because I was such a fool for not seeing that you didn't love me." Moving away from him, she glared at him, accusingly. "Yet, you left me hanging on to you like a lovesick girl. I could have been happy but you didn't have enough decency to tell me all those years…"

Ashley was holding her wrists, imploringly.

"Please calm down. Let me explain…"

Her jaw was stubbornly set. "You needn't bother." Then a sigh came form her lips and she placed her hand to her temples. "Don't worry, I won't slap you."

A smile came to his lips as both remembered her impetuous nature and how she had slapped him all those years ago in the library at Twelve Oaks.

"That's a relief."

Both were silent and once again Ashley grabbed her hand, an odd, pained expression on his face and he deeply sighed.

"Scarlett, I came to tell you something…"

With a raise of her brows, she said, "Well, go ahead, I am listening."

"After I lost Melanie… I thought I was too much of a coward to go on…"

Scarlett flinched but he continued.

"Then I thought of you. Your beautiful face and your courage. You have always been so strong and full of life. From the moment I returned from Europe, I loved you but I couldn't marry you. I married Melly because she was my blood and like me. Never could I have you as more then a dear friend…since I was a fool to believe you were too passionate for me. Now…"

The breath seemed lodged in her throat and her eyes widened. Being used to love declarations from men, she knew what he would say next. She didn't want to hear it and tried to block out his words.

"Ashley…"

"No let me finish, dear," he said grabbing her hand and searching her eyes. "I know you haven't been happy because you have thought of everyone but yourself. You married Captain Butler for money as you married Frank because I was too much of a coward to stop you… But Captain Butler was the worst. He hurt and coarsened that very sweetness…"

"Stop," she harshly cut in, pulling her hand out of his and getting to her feet. "Rhett didn't coarsen me. You were the one who didn't have enough decency to tell me that you didn't love me so that I-" she trailed off, floundering. "So that I could have quit wanting a man I could never be happy with…" Her voice became almost a murmur as she thought aloud. "When the only man I could have truly been happy with was right in front of me, the whole time… Oh, I was such a fool."

There was a queer look in his eyes as he rose to his feet, a rueful smile on his lips. "I suppose I am out of respect and not being very gentlemanly. Forgive me, Scarlett."

Giving in after consideration, she sat back down and forced a thin smile, although she felt sick and wished she could have just been left alone. "Well, enough serious talk for today. You simply must tell me the gossip that has circulated about me."

His eyes lowered briefly. "Well, they say you and Captain Butler are separating. Rather that he left you."

"Oh," she breathed, feeling anger and shame, hating that Ashley had to keep bringing such an awful subject up. "I wish people would mind their own business, Ashley. I never have any peace here because those hateful women have always been against me."

"You always had thought in that stubborn mind of yours, that I could make you happy," Ashley suddenly said, surprising Scarlett enough to gape at him. "I need you, my dear…"

Patting his hand, she smirked. "Not even those old biddies can keep me from seeing you, Ashley. You know I will always be here for Beau and you."

"You could leave, Rhett," Ashley desperately said.

Scarlett, not sure she had heard him right, stared at him incredulously.

"I love you, Scarlett. I have loved you for years, my dearest. It is strange loving two women isn't it? I loved Melanie for her gentility and heart." His voice cracked. "As I loved you for your courage and spirit. Oftentimes I wished that both of you had been one woman."

Scarlett knew she should have raged and found what Ashley was saying offensive. The selfishness of what he was saying was evident. Always thinking of himself and his dreams.

"But, Ashley I'm married," she said, her face shocked and outraged. Her mind swirled with shock and she could scarcely think past her pounding heart and head.

"When I think of how Captain Butler has hurt you, I can't stand it," Ashley raged, his voice filling with passion. "He abandoned you twice. And all the years he was unfaithful. Can't you see, darling he almost destroyed you? You could leave him and we…"

"No," she cut in, eyes blazing. "I won't leave, Rhett, Ashley. I love him."

Ashley rose to his feet, his face looking weary but a slight, hopeful smile on his face. Then he was kneeling before her and she was shocked. For years she had dreamt of this moment but now felt no satisfaction, not even vanity or pride.

He took her hands in his and began to speak: "You're the only dream that has never changed. That fire in your eyes has never left even as the world as we knew it was gone with the war. Leave Captain Butler and marry me, Scarlett. Melanie would have wanted us to be happy and Beau adores you."

Looking away, Scarlett sighed. Oh, to go through this bother of refusing Ashley. Not even did she linger on the thought of leaving Rhett and accepting the proposal. Gerald's words ringed in her ears that she would never in a million years be happy with Ashley. They were too different but she had a shot left to be happy with Rhett, incredibly happy.

She wouldn't loose that chance by turning to Ashley to make Rhett jealous. Those games would never work. And she couldn't spite Rhett for he had never cared for petty games. No, she couldn't leave Rhett and wouldn't let him go, even if it destroyed her.

Turning her eyes back to Ashley, she gently smiled to soften the blow of rejecting him. She was good practiced at refusing proposals. The only time it hadn't worked was with Rhett, but Ashley certainly wasn't Rhett. That was one thing she could never forget.

"Oh, Ashley," she said, with a smile. "You still love Melly. We could never make each other happy because we are too different and I love Rhett. I do love you, but you see-that is I…"

A sad smile came to his lips. Getting back on his feet, he looked down at her endearingly. "I see. I'm too late since you have it in your head to stay with Captain Butler… Do you really love him, Scarlett? You once told me you didn't. I could always see the sadness lurking in those green eyes."

"No, I love him," she said with finality in her voice. "I was incredibly unhappy, Ashley. Sometimes I still am when I think of the stupid, foolish things I did. And when I think of Melly and Bonnie…I miss them so."

After her confession, Ashley sat back down beside her and took her in his arms. There was no excitement or any close feeling to what had been. Only the warmth of friendship and a shoulder to rest on in her weariness and grief. Naturally, her body sank against his thin frame.

"How will we get on without her?" she asked, her voice muffled in his shoulder. "I took her for granted but I truly did love her…"

Before she had time to react, Ashley pulled slightly back so that his eyes met hers. The change in his eyes was evident as they went to her eyes and lips. Scarlett became paralyzed and couldn't move as his head lowered and his lips gently met hers.

For a brief moment, she let herself be kissed. No doubt Rhett was kissing Sally Bright and didn't care for her. At least Ashley cared and was here to comfort her but he wasn't Rhett. Yet, Rhett should have been the one holding her, kissing her and soothing away all the pain and fear, the hell they had went through since Bonnie and Melanie had died…

Ashley's lips weren't hard or firm like Rhett's. The way his lips moved against hers left her unmoved and she panicked as she realized that she was letting Ashley kiss her.

Jerking away, she saw his eyes were hazy with passion and felt sick to her stomach. The wine had made her take leave of her senses.

"You must get this ridiculous notion out of your head, Ashley Wilkes," she ordered. "I love Rhett, and t-this shan't happen again. You know I will always be there for Beau and you but not as a…"

"Wife," he sadly said. "I have lost my wife and I know no one can ever replace her but I had hoped…" Sighing, he got to his feet. "I guess we will forget about this…"

"Yes," she agreed nodding, relieved. "I'll show you out."

"No," he lightly interjected. "I want to remember you like this, not telling me good-bye and sending me away. But before I leave… the offer to become my wife still stands. If you should change your mind…"

"I won't," she bluntly said. Sometimes Ashley could be so melancholy. It had been one of the things she had loved about him. Just why she had, she didn't know. Wishing to appease him, she lightly touched his arm.

"You haven't gotten rid of me yet, Ashley Wilkes and you never shall. I will never say good-bye."

Giving her a quick and grateful kiss to her forehand, he turned and was gone. She watched him disappear and once he had she tiredly made her way to the settee and fell down with a heavy sigh.

_My wife is gone_ Ashley had said. No one could ever replace Melanie in is heart as no one could ever replace Rhett. Scarlett wanted to hate him but couldn't find herself to do so. Ashley had lost Melly to death but she had lost Rhett, and it was a greater loss. It was a loss by Rhett's choice.

Rhett claimed to not want her and went out of his way to avoid her. Well, she wasn't going to cower in her house. Tomorrow, she knew what she would do. She would fulfill her promise to Melly and visit the mills, she was certain that they loosing profit since Ashley's math skills had never been good.

TBC


	38. Of Business and Duty

Part 38

Note: Thanks for the reviews! Rhett will be coming back in the story shortly by chapter 41 as I said and 44. Here is the next chapter and I hope you all enjoy. (As you can tell my notes have become shorter and forgive me for not mentioning all you wonderful people by name but I'm lazy and tired. : )

Part 38

The black carriage pulled in front of the lumber yard and had anyone been paying attention, they would have noticed that it was the private Butler carriage and inside sat Scarlett, wearing her usual mourning garb, black gloves and a flimsy veil that lightly covered her face, draping from her hat.

The window was slightly open and she stared out, watching as Ashley made his departure for lunch. Of course she would know that time like the back of her hand. Prior to Melanie's death, she would keep that time like a holy ritual. Waiting for that time in which Ashley would be free from work and they were able to take lunch together.

The time was without fail. And as Ashley drove away, she was glad he was gone and hadn't seen her. Ashley must never know she helped him and it saved her from awkwardness. After his proposal, she didn't know if she could face him or if he could face her.

Opening the door, she stepped out onto the dirt packed street, her booted heel coming lightly onto the ground as the other leg followed.

"Wait here," she ordered the driver. "I will be but a moment."

There was a cool breeze and she enjoyed the feel of it pushing the veil from her face and giving her a moment respite from the heated feeling on her cheeks. The store looked dusty and she flinched at noticing it. Surely they couldn't be making much of a profit and she would have Andrew Finigan's head for this.

Opening the door, she marched in and took off her hat. In time to see a customer depart, going past her way and eyeing her. Scarlett eyed them back as they left and she came to the counter, placing her arms on it and waiting expectantly.

Andrew Finigan didn't notice her at first until she cleared her throat and his head snapped up. The look of astonishment on his face was priceless but she kept her face straight as she said, "Mr. Finigan, come with me into the office."

Not waiting for his reply, she walked right past him and heard him following her. Once reaching the sanctuary of her office, she turned her full fury on him.

"I ordered you to do your job and not let the store turn into a shanty town! It's in shambles and is deserted. There is dust, dirt and grime. Even my home looked better then this during the war."

"Mrs. Butler," he tried but she firmly held up a hand.

"Show me the mill ledgers."

"But Mr. Wilkes… I don't think you want to see them."

She scowled. "I didn't ask you to tell me what you think I want to see! I want the ledgers now and then I want you to leave me and clean the store top to bottom."

Sighing, he went to do her bidding. And she wondered why she hadn't fired the incompetent man. Drumming her badly bitten fingernails on the desk, she rounded it and sat down, ready for a long and excruciating look through every figure on the sheet.

It wasn't long before Finigan shuffled in and with a mumble, deposited the ledger on her desk. She took it, opening it and ordered that she didn't want to be disturbed for any reason.

Later, she slipped out before she knew Ashley would return. The ledgers were in order but they had lost a lot of money. Scarlett knew in order to fulfill her wish to Melanie all that would have to be changed.

Finigan was desperately cleaning the windows when she came up to him. Standing there, waiting for him to acknowledge her presence.

"You are to show me the ledgers once a week when I come in," she told him. "And it is only to be between us, is that clear? Mr. Wilkes isn't to know of this or that India Wilkes with all the snooping she does."

"Yes ma'am," he answered. Taking the offered ledgers from her hands.

XXX

Watching the passing scenery, Scarlett felt a little melancholy; especially thinking about how much Atlanta had changed. Remembering how Atlanta had once been before the war and Melanie…It had settled down a bit, not too much to be as boring as Charleston but enough that it seemed old and dull to her. But of course she didn't let such trivia things as change keep her down.

She thrived on change and life. The driver was talking her to the small schoolhouse to pick up the children. Prior to this time, Rhett would always do so or she would send Prissy. But for appearances sake and because she had no better things to do, she would grin and bear by doing her motherly duty.

This duty she put her self through wasn't too hard nevertheless it had its trying days. Especially yesterday in the store when Ella had caused a scene. Scarlett wanted to back hand her but she had calmed down enough to speak in a controlled voice.

Truly, it wasn't that hard to speak with the children about the mundane things of their life. They were so simple and didn't want much from her. Actually they were pleased by so little, especially Wade.

The way he followed and hung on her words reminded her of a dog. It pleased her just as much that someone actually valued her opinion and loved her whole-heartedly. Unlike Rhett who didn't value her thoughts nor showed such devotion.

She didn't question that she showed very little devotion. The only devotion she had shown was to Ellen and Ashley. In the end she had shown devotion to Melanie but it had been ephemeral. Such devotion could have been possible, if only Melly had lived.

The school bell pealed, signifying the end of the school day. It wasn't long that Scarlett watched from the window as the children filed out and Ella came, running out with a worried look on her face.

There were tears spotted on her face as she advanced closer and Scarlett sighed. Ella was far too thin skinned. Once Ella was in front of the door and Wade hadn't made any signs of coming out, Scarlett took a breath.

"Where is Wade, Ella?"

"Mr. Williams kept him," she said with a hiccup. "He h-hit another boy and Mr. Williams took a strap to h-his hand."

Scarlett wasn't surprised about the strap but her jaw dropped open. She was surprised about the fact that Wade had hit another boy. Why, he couldn't have hit a fly in all of his years.

Opening the door with her gloved hand, she stepped out.

"You wait in the carriage, Ella and I will go to speak Mr. Williams," she told her daughter, forcing a smile on her lips. "Don't worry, mother will handle everything."

She would handle Mr. Williams. True, she had never met him but knew he must be a new teacher if he hadn't been able to handle the situation and Wade had hit a boy. Surely he was mistaken and she would set matters right.

The walk to the door wasn't long and once she entered, her eyes immediately went to Wade. He was sitting at a desk with a stony look on his face. But at seeing her, fear and shame flooded his face.

Taking her eyes off of him, they immediately went to the teacher and her jaw nearly dropped in surprise. This man was far from old and didn't look the least bit ruffled.

As he neared her, his steps slightly awkward, she felt nervous under his gaze. He was a second generation German-American, had a round face, which still managed to be sharply defined. Age was impossible to determine, she could guess he was in his early forties. His still blue eyes belied an inner kindness Scarlett could sense.

As his gaze turned to her, she felt as if every part of her was being scrutinized, measured. She looked at the rugged stubble building above and below his lips. His hair was also the most vibrant color, a slight tinge of golden red that she had never seen before.

But she pulled her mind from his masculinity to the present. Truly something was wrong with her, her emotions in turmoil.

"Mr. Williams, why have you held Wade after class?" she coolly asked.

"It has been my experience, Mrs. Butler," he jokingly said. "When a student misbehaves, he is punished. Wade hit a fellow student and wouldn't explain his actions."

"Maybe it's because you didn't have the decency to hear him out," she retorted hotly. "How long have you been a teacher because surely-"

"Ten years," he interjected, having the nerve for his lips to quirk into a smile. "I have experience."

Scarlett was doubtful so she pointedly ignored him and went over to Wade. Gently as she could she asked, "Wade, what happened?"

His brown eyes were sad and filled with tears as he looked up at her. "This boy said that you were white trash and so was Aunt Melly for consorting with you…" He swallowed. "And that Uncle Rhett had left you. That he was goin' to divorce you and leave us penniless…"

Feeling anger rising up in her, she forced herself to calm down. "None of that is true."

"I won't apologize," Wade, whispered, fire coming to his eyes.

Wade's sudden stubbornness and pride made Scarlett feel proud of him. A fierce pride and love swept through her for her son. A feeling she had never associated with Wade. Placing a hand on his shoulder, she kindly said, "I wasn't going to ask you to."

Then she shot a look at Mr. Williams, daring him to contradict her. But he merely shrugged and sat down, his arms going behind his head as he leaned back, as if enjoying the exchange.

"See you tomorrow in class Hamilton. And don't forget your book," Mr. Williams simply said and his blue eyes turned to Scarlett. "It was a pleasure meeting you, Mrs. Butler."

"I'm sure," she muttered. "It was a misfortune for me, Mr. Williams. And just to warn you, no one puts a strap to my son's hand. Next time you do, you'll solely regret it."

"I don't enjoy doing it, Mrs. Butler," he called out. "But I gather I will be seeing you very soon."

Then he had the gall to wink at her. Her mouth dropped open and she turned on her heel, marching out. What an awful teacher! In some ways, his impudence reminded her of Rhett but he seemed less charismatic then Rhett was.

"I should have his job pulled," Scarlett fumed. "What an awful man!"

"He's not bad, mother," Wade told her. "He's sarcastic and all but I like Mr. Williams, even if he did discipline me."

Turning her eyes back to her son as they approached the carriage, she smiled. "I am proud of you Wade, for hitting that boy. I would have done the same thing. Your grandfather had to discipline me a many a time for hitting my fellow class mates."

Wade laughed. "I wish I could have seen that, mother. I always remember you beautiful and elegant."

There had been a time Scarlett O'Hara had been far from elegant and poised. The years had gone by and she could scarcely remember those days. But she laughed a long with Wade as she put her arm in his and they went to the carriage.

TBC


	39. Two Visits and a Visitor

Part 39

"India Wilkes, I know you're in there," Scarlett yelled loudly, her eyes scanning the windows for any life that might move across it. "You might as well open up!"

"Go away," a voice hissed after a moment and a self-satisfied smile came to Scarlett's lips. India Wilkes was home and would open up the door. The fact that anyone down the street could hear Scarlett yell would no doubt cause a scandal if India didn't open up.

"I'll shout louder unless you open this door," Scarlett threatened.

A second later, the sound of the door being unbolted sounded and the door opened a crack. To reveal India Wilkes' pale face, clenched between anger and embarrassment. She looked paler then usual and there were the beginnings of a hot flush coming to her cheeks.

"Just go away," India said, her eyes shooting daggers. "You've done enough all ready."

India was about to shut the door but Scarlett was quicker and stepped in front, pushing the door open with little effort for she came right in and nearly fell but caught herself. She was in the house now and felt bile fill her throat as her eyes roamed across the dim, deserted hallway.

Not a light was lit. As India muttered angrily, she thought of Melanie's last moments on earth. She remembered being in this very room and Rhett leaving her. Of Ashley grasping her glove and the utter despair. The door was shut and she visibly jumped.

"I need to speak with you," Scarlett quietly said, as if she had to be quiet. This place was like a tomb and she shivered as she pulled her shawl closer. "I'm not leaving until we have a decent conversation about… Ashley and Beau."

India scowled, moving fiercely past her. "They are no concern of yours!"

"That is where you are wrong, India Wilkes. On Melanie's death bed she made me promise that I would take care of them."

The other woman seemed to get madder for she clenched her fists. "If you think I'm going to receive you as a caller, you are sadly mistaken. You can tell me in this hall then get out. You've all ready caused enough damage."

"I have a proposition for you, India," Scarlett said, not beating around the bush. "You let me look over Ashley and Beau, not getting in my way, I'll make it worth your while."

"How?" she suspiciously asked.

Scarlett shrugged. "I'm not a fool to think that men want money. But you have no suitor or prospects. Since the war, you have lost all the money John Wilkes had at Twelve Oaks. If I gave you enough money you could have a chance at not being an old maid anymore..."

"You think I'd sell my brother's happiness for money?" she indignantly asked.

Rolling her eyes, she laughed. "You can't fool me, India Wilkes. You might act like a lady but you're every bit as hard as me and you desperately are tired of taking care of others. You detest Aunt Pitty and her fainting spells. Most of all you hate a brother clinging to your skirts and taking care of a boy who isn't your own… Take the money and let me fulfill my promise to Melly."

"I'll take the money," India muttered, her eyes flashing. "But I'll still hate you until the day I die. Everything that has happened to you, you deserved."

Scarlett was unfazed. "And you wonder why you are an old maid. You are mean and hateful India Wilkes. Prudish, without an ounce of attractiveness but bitter and a dried out old prune. I pity the man who marries you, but better him as long as you are out of my hair."

"I take it we understand each other," she stiffly said, "you now may leave."

As to prove her point, she went to the door and opened it. And upon the door being opened, Scarlett's gaze met the befuddled one of Ashley Wilkes. His eyes roamed between sister and Scarlett but he finally broke out into a weak grin. Scarlett felt awkward since their last meeting but she smiled brightly, knowing it unnerved India.

"Ashley, how wonderful to see you," she chattered, her hand going to his arm. "I simply was paying India a visit and on my way to see the children. Surely you will come over later to see them and bring India with you."

India glared and Ashley shifted uncomfortably. She knew his eyes were fastened on her and she did feel unnerved. Still, the smile did not slip from her lips as Ashley hastily agreed for India and him. They would accept the invitation and she left with a self-satisfied smile.

Things were going her way. Ashley and Beau would be taken care of discreetly, no one knew of her visits to the mills, the children were fine at school and India was out of her hair. Next, to tackle would be the old guard.

XXX

Flowers laden in her arms, Scarlett walked across the Oakland Cemetery's slightly wet grass. It had been a dreary day and after sending the children off to see Beau, she had an overwhelming need to see Melanie's grave.

Winding her way through the head stones, the names blurred past her. The cemetery seemed deserted as the wind howled, slightly picking up but not enough that it felt like a winter storm. It was soothing somehow as she came to the spot and paused before the marker.

It was the best and Scarlett had picked it out against protests. _Melanie Hamilton Wilkes: Beloved wife and mother. _The years of her life were read, only twenty-nine years old. Not even making it to middle aged woman. Never to see any grandchildren or her boy grow up.

Scarlett thought of the unfairness of it as she kneeled down on the wet grass, it soaking to her knees as she gently smoothed the grime off the head stone and placed her forehead briefly against the cold surface.

"Oh, Melly," she whispered. "I need you so. I never realized how much you meant to me. For that I will always be sorry…"

Rhett's words rang in her mind; _you're such a child Scarlett, you think saying I'm sorry all the past mistakes can be erased. _Melanie couldn't accept her apology but somehow deep down she knew if Melanie were alive, she would have forgiven Scarlett for being so blind.

No, Scarlett amended. Melanie would have never thought she had been so horrid and blind. In her mind, she had never been able to do wrong. Such devotion, she knew would never exist again for her and she had taken it for granted. Suddenly and desperately she wished she had a friend. Someone to confide in and who would accept her for who she was.

"Mrs. Butler," a voice greeted her. A man's voice that caused her briefly to freeze and turn her head. Looking up, she knew it wasn't Rhett and her heart sank. It was Rodney Williams, her children's teacher who she had found annoying the other day.

"Mr. Williams," she coolly greeted, getting to her feet with difficulty.

His eyes were dancing. "It's the perfect weather to be without a coat… Take mine, surely you should dress warmer."

Somehow it seemed unsettling and intimate talking of dressing in clothing or lack of it. Yet, it was an easy conversation and he had an easy smile on his lips, the stubble making him appear more rugged then she remembered, but she pushed those thoughts aside as she briefly felt a pang that it wasn't Rhett to who she was speaking to.

"I am warm enough," she lied. "What brings you out here, Mr. Williams? A family member or a sweetheart?" She didn't know what had possessed her to ask the question.

"No, I merely was taking a stroll," he joked. "To answer your question I have no sweetheart."

"A wife?" she added.

"No," he dryly laughed. "Only an nagging mother and a sister."

Scarlett found herself enjoying the conversation and felt briefly guilty. "Why aren't you married?" she boldly asked, ignoring any guilt.

"No woman will put up with me," he easily answered but didn't seemed disheartened, quite the contrary. And as she observed him, she saw striking similarities between Rhett and him, despite the difference in the color of their eyes and hair.

Both their bodies were far from graceful, bigger bodies but still trim. Both were about the same height although for some reason Rhett seemed taller to her. As she thought this, she had fallen silent but forced a slight smile of truce.

"I should be leaving…"

He easily nodded and his eyes roved away, a little awkwardly but his lips quirked into a smile. "Good day, Mrs. Butler."

"Good day," she echoed, watching as he walked away.

There was a slight spring in his step as he left and she watched the gait of his walk. For a moment she imagined if Rhett were here and wondered how he would react to Wade and Ella's teacher. He was unlike any teacher she had ever met, somehow she could imagine the two of them playing cards together and that made her smile.

Pulling her mind back to thoughts of the present. She kneeled down one last time and lingeringly touched the head stone. Setting the flowers down, she touched Melanie's name. If she had been a religious woman like Ellen or as devout as Melly, she would have prayed.

"What would you do Melly?" she asked, feeling a little self-conscious she was speaking to the wind. "Oh, what shall I do? I need Rhett back. You said he loved me, but he let me walk away…"

There was no reply. Only the shuffle of the trees branches. The wind lifted a few tendrils of hair from her face and moved her locket as she clasped it in her hand and rose to her feet.

Knowing that Melanie would have joined the cause and would have beaten the fat old cats with kindness, goodness and patience. Virtues she had never possessed but she knew what she had to do. To beat them she would have to be as sacrificial as Melanie, join the cause she had despised. Plan in head, she turned and quietly left the cemetery.

TBC


	40. The Old Guard Surrenders

Part 40

Note: Thanks for the reviews! Many of you said you disliked Mr. Williams or that he bugged you and many others noticed that he and Scarlett had some banter going on. I think he will be more in the story in the future… Anyway please enjoy and I love reviews, of course 

Part 40

There wasn't a visible change of the town's people's opinion about Scarlett Butler at first. They still believed she was a viper and a trashy woman. But as the weeks turned into a month of her being the embodiment of the concerned citizen and good mother, people began to gradually warm up to her once again.

Offering condolences for the loss of her darling daughter and occasionally coming to her shop to see if it was true she had really changed. The change in her amazed many and it had people abuzz with gossip, especially Mrs. Merriweather, Mrs. Meade and Mrs. Elsing.

"Perhaps we were to hard on the poor girl," Mrs. Meade was saying. "Melanie did love her after all…"

Mrs. Merriweather snorted. "The Lord loved Judas too and he betrayed him with a kiss. I don't accept that hog wash that Scarlett has changed. Her likes don't change but become more corrupted."

"But Dolly," Mrs. Elsing interjected. "Captain Butler married her and he got your daughter her wedding dress during the war when we were low on material. And how he loved that little girl…"

All were quiet for a brief moment in the memory of Bonnie Butler. They continued to believe she was the only good thing that had come from a bad apple like Scarlett. Even a sad quiver came to Dolly Merriweather's lips.

"It is said from the strictest confidence that Captain Butler left her," Dolly continued. "I don't blame him a bit. When that little girl died, Captain Butler lost all heart and then Melanie… Melanie might have been too good for her own good but I am not easily fooled."

Mrs. Meade shook her head. "Dolly, you might not accept her but I shall call on her and proudly do so. Melanie would have us do the same and people deserve Christian charity. It is evident Scarlett has changed… I heard something that she did, a selfless act on her part."

"What?" both women questioned at the same time.

"Before she left, heaven knows where, she gave credit from her store. She has never done so, even after the war and consorting with those Yankees and carpet beggars. But she loaned me credit and even Mrs. Elsing."

Mrs. Merriweather was silent a moment and sighed. "Perhaps I misjudged her… but I am not too sure yet. Well, we simply shall call on her and see for ourselves. If she has changed, I will personally ask her to join the knitting society and help those less fortunate. But mark my words, she has not changed."

Mrs. Elsing and Mrs. Meade smiled at each other in triumph. As far as they were concerned, they were letting Melanie's legacy live on and Scarlett Butler deserved another chance and a show of good will.

XXX

Gripping her store counter tightly, Scarlett took a few deep breaths and closed her eyes, trying to catch her bearings. All day she had felt nauseated and dizzy and it hadn't helped that she had been awake nearly all night trying to correct the mill ledgers again.

She simply couldn't let the mills go under. They were still her source of pride and Ashley's only income, even if she didn't own them. If they went, he would never accept charity but rather starve. So she continued on unrelentlessly with the sole goal of winning over the old guard, being the best mother and fulfilling her wish to Melanie.

Never one to slow down, she pushed her malady aside as a mere side affect of over working herself and eating less. Her appetite and been non-existent and her nights filled with dreams of Rhett. It had been more than a month since she had last seen him and each day a part, she felt herself falling deeper into despair, though she didn't let on.

People still talked about her husbandless state and that Rhett had left her. She had received sporadic letters from Charleston from her aunts and Eleanor on Rhett's welfare but it wasn't enough. Her nights were filled with dreams of him until she would wake up and wouldn't know reality from a dream.

Then the despair would come crashing over her. The brandy decanter had almost become her constant companion at night. Staying awake, drinking it until passing out in Rhett's bed. Even his scent was disappearing and she could no longer remember the details of his face or the sound of his voice.

Pushing thoughts of him from her mind, she caught her bearings in time when the sound of the bell in the door jingled and her eyes widened.

It was Mrs. Merriweather, Mrs. Elsing and Mrs. Meade. She felt struck dumb as she stared at them incredulously and hadn't expected they would come so soon to speak with her.

"Great balls of fire," she muttered. Wishing she could escape, for she felt like she would retch any moment and wasn't ready for this yet. Her hands shook as she plastered a weak smile on her face.

"Hello, is there anything I can do for you all?"

"We heard of the credit you leant out," Mrs. Merriweather gruffly said. "Why did you do so?"

Eyelashes lowering briefly, she looked back at them. "I owe it… to-to the cause and to the memory of Melanie. She would have done so. And I…" Scarlett let her voice trail off, as she looked ashamed. "I am so ashamed for my actions and wish to make amends."

They looked at her as if she were the persecutor of the Church, Paul of Tarsus who had been blinded by a light and had come to a startlingly conversion. Remembering that story, Scarlett felt very much transformed as if she had become the apostle Paul of whom Ellen had often told her about.

"I-I never said I was sorry for your losses, Scarlett," Mrs. Merriweather said. "And I wasn't because I thought you deserved it. But because of Melanie, I know she would want me to invite you to our sewing and meetings. Scarlett, these past years you have been a spoiled, flighty brat, yet I see some of your dear mother in you and know that everyone is redeemable…"

"I…"

Scarlett felt a flood of relief but her body didn't agree. Suddenly her stomach turned and she fell forward, stars swimming before her eyes. Clutching on the counter, she could feel her legs buckling.

The women were holding her in an instant and one was kneeled beside her on the ground, her head on their chest as a mother would do for an ailing child. Patting her head and stroking her sweaty brow as Mrs. Elsing got her water and they gently tipped it to her lips.

Drinking greedily, she let out a few shuddering breaths and could scarcely meet their eyes as she got shakily up to her feet.

"I'm sorry," she murmured. "I don't know what came over me…"

"Mrs. Meade," Mrs. Merriweateher said. "Go and get your husband."

"I'm fine," Sacrlett assured them, weakly, hating the weakness that engulfed her body. "I don't want nor need to see the doctor." Yet, her head lolled and she was once again engulfed in their arms as they pulled her up to her feet, one arm still around her shoulder, as any mother would do.

Mrs. Merriweather had never hid her dislike for Scarlett but now she seemed to take pity in the woman. Scarlett, hating pity, pulled herself away as a stubborn look came to her face and she caught her bearings. She couldn't accept pity especially from the likes of her.

Customers came in and went out; surprisingly the older women met their needs or told them the store wasn't open today. Really, Scarlett should have fought them and demanded they leave with hot words. But she was too tired to protest. So she sat in a chair with a cool rag over her head.

Perhaps she had drank too much and needed to quit. She had been drinking awfully a lot lately, too much. But Rhett seemed to haunt her. Rather it was someone who looked similar to him or even Mr. Williams reminded her of Rhett. Both sarcastic men with looks that was similar.

No, she mustn't think of Rhett. In some ways, even though she missed him, he had faded slightly from her mind. But then there were times she would go to the places he had walked, the places he had went and would find herself in front of the bank he had worked, for no apparent reason either then to grasp onto some part of him frantically. If Bonnie had still been alive, she would have hugged and kissed the little girl. So much a part of her and Rhett, she wouldn't have let her go.

Word had all ready spread Rhett had left her like wildfire. Yet, she couldn't admit she was defeated. Rhett would return and he would ask for her forgiveness. They would be together and no matter how many pitying looks she received and her body was so tired, she wouldn't cave in.

Looking up as the doorbell jingled, she saw Dr. Meade. His brow was furrowed and he appeared older then she remembered. Summoning a weak smile, she tried to pretend nothing was wrong.

"What is this young lady?" he asked. "I heard you are over working yourself and nearly fainted."

Shrugging, she said, "I am perfectly fine."

His eyes observed her and he shook his head. "Let us go into your office and you three ladies please leave. Mrs. Meade I will see you at home."

As the women made move to leave, Scarlett got to her feet and cried, "Mrs. Merriweather!"

The woman turned before she went out the door and Scarlett's eyes met hers unflinchingly.

"I accept your offer. I will come to your next meeting."

"I will see you then," she said in a business like tone. "Good day, Scarlett."

The women echoed the sentiment and Scarlett nodded as they left. Then she turned to show Dr. Meade into her office. Feeling unnerved at what he would say. Of course she knew it was only over wrought nerves and nothing more.

"You don't look well, Scarlett," Dr. Meade said without preamble. "Captain Butler didn't either the last time I saw him… How long have you felt sick?"

A frown settled between her eyes as she thought. "A week or so. But I truly am fine and you're making a fuss over nothing."

"Let me be the judge of that young lady. How have you felt lately?"

"Slightly dizzy and a lack of appetite but I have been stressed so it is perfectly normal…"

"Very well," he said with a sigh. "But if it keeps on persisting, come back and see me. Also I order you to get more sleep and eat more."

"I will," she muttered but smiled. "Thank you Dr. Meade."

The old man left the office and Scarlett watched him, staring off into space until he was long gone. With a tired sigh, she made her way out to greet a customer though her heart wasn't in it.

TBC


	41. And the malady persists

Part 41

Note: Thank you my lovely 6 reviewers. I find it delightful many of you seem fine with Mr. Williams and others hate him… It shows that he might prove to be a controversial character although I haven't quite developed him fully. Here is the next part and by next chapter you all will find out just what Scarlett's malady is, though many of you have all ready guessed it. Enjoy and please review.

Part 41

"So you really left her? I don't believe it." Belle incredulously asked as she took another sip of wine. "I heard how she followed you to Charleston."

"You should know me better than anyone, Belle. I never do anything on an impulse. I was planning on leaving months ago. She followed me but I sent her back eventually," Rhett replied as he took another sip of wine and stared at the dying embers.

Belle studied Rhett's handsome features as he stared at the fire as if memorized. For as long as she had known Rhett, she had never seen him as crazy for any woman as he had been for Scarlett O'Hara.

"Go home, Rhett," she said. "Go home now before you regret it. I know you're in love with her, so you might as well stop pretending. Why else would you be in town? If I remember correctly she arrived back in Atlanta a month ago."

"I may care for her but I don't love her. Those are two different things," he answered curtly. "I only came to see you and for some buisiness matters."

Her lips twitched as if amused. "Not from where I am standing. Good God, Rhett… You can't even tell me you don't love the girl. You're just as in love with her as from the very day you first met her. And don't think I don't know it, I do. You're dying to know about her but too damn stubborn to admit it."

"You don't know what you're talking about…" Belle only shook her head and spoke as if Rhett hadn't uttered a word.

"I know what I know and I do know you love her. Rhett, I'm telling you to go home now… you're being a coward. Running away… what good will it do for you? She told you she loved you and you don't know what to do with it. So you're planning on running, just like the day night after Mr. Wilkes party."

Anger surged through Rhett. He remembered that party as if it were yesterday. Belle had been right; he had only run from his problems. He abruptly stood up and he sent the whole tray of wine flying towards the fireplace with a loud crash.

Belle only watched Rhett with a knowing glance. Nothing Rhett did frightened her. She had known Rhett long enough that she could read him like a book. Even if he were angry with her, he would never strike her or any woman for that matter.

"I'm leaving," Rhett peevishly declared as he grabbed his coat and hat.

"Good," Belle replied, "Then maybe you'll go home on the way to your destination. Rhett, honey… you know I care for you. I only want you happy. And as much as it pains me I know only that green eyed vixen can do it."

Rhett only stared at Belle a moment, knowing she had more to say.

"Have a nice trip, honey. And don't worry about your vixen, I'll watch her like an old mother hen and if anything is amiss I'll send for you," she said as she pinched Rhett's chin playfully.

Belle's only answer from Rhett was a slam of the door.

She smiled slightly as she lounged in the settee. It would be very interesting to watch Scarlett O'Hara Butler to say the least. She had always been interested in Scarlett. Rhett had always spoken about her with the highest praise. Only a few times had he cursed her. And that was only when she had hurt him.

Scarlett O'Hara Hamilton Kennedy Butler was a very interesting woman. She had charm, grace and undying beauty. And she always had Rhett's love. Scarlett O'Hara had Rhett Butler wrapped around her finger even though she wasn't aware of it. She just hoped Rhett wasn't in France too long.

XXX

Sickness washed over Scarlett again until she was leaning over the lavatory and retching out any remains of her breakfast. Furiously she wiped at her mouth with a handkerchief she found in her pocket. Eyes closing as she let out a few steadying breathes. Only the other day had she heard that Rhett had been in Atlanta from reliable sources, well if you could call the old cats that.

She had been at another sewing circle when they had brought up his name. Of course he had been seen going to that Watling creature's establishment. That wasn't the only thing that angered Scarlett but the fact he hadn't bothered to come and see her, not even the children. At that moment she had hated him for his disregard and her feelings were slowly hardening towards him.

Opening her eyes, her line of vision happed to stare at the letters on the handkerchief: **RKB**. Feeling another wave of nausea and heart sickness wash over her. Shuddering, she felt like crying and wondered if she could be dying. Truly, she couldn't remember feeling so sick and this illness had persisted, despite her attempts to deny it.

Knocking sounded on her door.

"Mother are you okay?"

It was Wade and she forced herself up from her knees. Wiping at her mouth again, she went to the door and opened it. Wade stood there, an uncertain look on his face as he took in the sweat beading on her forehead and the handkerchief she was clenching.

"I'm fine, Wade," she said with a sigh, but placed her hand on her temples. "Where is Ella?"

"At school," he murmured, his eyes dropping in shame.

Scarlett processed that her son wasn't at school while her daughter was. "What day is it?"

"Tuesday. I'm not at school because…"

"Yes," Scarlett demanded, crossing her arms.

"I couldn't. That boy keeps on bugging me and he lied yesterday. He told Mr. Williams that I thought he was foolish and had a funny walk. I don't think that…"

Sighing, Scarlett closed her eyes. She couldn't deal with this today of all days and thought of letting Wade stay home. But, no, she knew she had to be firm with him and she would rather have him at school then moping around. It still surprised her that her son loved school where at his age she had detested it and books.

Frowning, Scarlett peered at him. "You are going to school Wade Hamilton. Never mind what that boy says. I will talk to Mr. Williams and make sure there is an end to that brat's taunts."

Wade's face relaxed and he nodded with visible relief. He quickly went to her and gave her a peck on the cheek, his face beaming. "Thank you mother."

XXX

Walking into the classroom with a room full of students was not how Scarlett wanted to spend her day. Ella saw her and waved ecstatically towards her; making move to get up and go to her mother but Mr. Williams voice stopped her.

"Sit down and finish your work, Ella," he chided, his voice laced with amusement. No doubt Ella had many a time tried to leave her desk since she was slightly scatter brained.

Scarlett nodded for Wade to sit down as Mr. Williams came towards her. Once Wade had done so and Mr. Williams was in front of her, she eyed him. From the top of is bent head with the reddish gold tint of hair to his eyes.

"Mr. Williams, I need to speak with you privately."

Her gave a brief nod. "Very well. Would you care to go outside?"

At her nod he turned towards the class. "I'm going to step outside for a moment. Everyone try not to get into trouble… especially you Roger."

Everyone laughed at that and the boy who Scarlett thought was Roger snickered laughingly. "I will be on my best behavior, Mr. Williams."

"I'm sure," he muttered, but there was a smile on is face as he turned towards her. The pleasant smile and the way his face seemed relaxed and peaceful through Scarlett off guard. But she kept Wade in her mind.

As soon as they walked through the door and it was shut behind them, Scarlett turned her fury on him. "Mr. Williams, Wade keeps on having trouble with some brat boy who enjoys antagonizing him. I suggest you do your job and discipline the brat."

"Mrs. Butler, I deal with those problems right away. If a student is rude to another I will publicly tell them to stop. If Wade has been bothered it had been without my knowledge. But I have an idea who it is and it will be stopped."

His easy acceptance surprised her. Nodding gratefully, she sunk on the stair rail for support. Watching Mr. Williams as he deeply sighed and stretched his arms above his head. She couldn't help but notice as his shirt raised a great many inches to his abdomen, showing a stomach and back that was firm and oddly… appealing.

It surprised her that she could find another man suddenly attractive. It was Rhett she wanted; yet here she was looking at another man's stomach. Unexpectedly, she realized she was attracted to another man who wasn't Rhett and she felt shaken. Surely she had been out too long.

The feeling wasn't a welcomed one as nausea rose in her stomach again and she knew with humiliation she couldn't keep it in. Placing her hand to her mouth, she raced away to the side of the school and vomited the rest of the contents of her stomach.

She heard his shuffling behind her and then felt comforting hands on her shoulders. Closing her eyes, she remembered Rhett doing the same thing when she had been sick and pregnant with Ella. Only, he hadn't been so tender and had called her a fool. Scarlett felt tears of humiliation and exhaustion fill her eyes.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. Trying to move away from him but he gently pushed her back so that her back was resting against the wall. He was kneeled in front of her with a worried crease between his brows.

"No, don't move yet. "

"I'm so embarrassed," she muttered, not staring at him in his eyes.

"It's a natural part of life."

Finally her eyes rose to meet his and he was smiling. His attractiveness assaulted her again. Certainly it wasn't the charismatic attractiveness of Rhett but a quieter one, a kinder one. His pale blue eyes met hers but then flickered away until she thought it had been of no consequence and she had only imagined it.

"You will help, Wade won't you like you said?" she asked.

Nodding, he helped her to her feet. Offering her his arm, she took it and he led her to her carriage. Both walked in a harmonious pace and he seemed to slow down for her slightly uneasy steps.

The only thought Scarlett could process was despite the fact she felt sick she felt comfortable. She hadn't felt that way in a long time around another human being. Feeling deep gratitude she smiled at him once they had reached the door.

"Thank you for… everything, Mr. Williams."

He seemed uncomfortable under such gratitude but his eyes were warm. He nodded awkwardly as he helped her into the carriage. Once she was seated, she watched him through the window as he walked away, a spring in his step.

Scarlett wasn't one to give into defeat. Being self-sufficient was one thing she prided herself for and she didn't want to see the doctor. But if she was going to keep getting sick in public, she had no other choice. She would have to go see Dr. Meade…

And after that, it was high time she went back to Tara for a visit. To see Mammy and that land she had missed so much. Tomorrow she would make an appointment with him while the children were at school.

TBC


	42. News

Part 42

Note: I know this is a shorter chapter but I hope you enjoy it. Thank you for the wonderful reviews, as always, they keep me writing and the fact that I need to finish this story. 

Part 42

Each sound of a carriage passing by or talking outside brought Scarlett to the window. Dr. Meade was supposed to arrive any moment. So when the knock at the door came, she waited for Prissy to answer it, peering out from the parlor.

But was mystified as Prissy shut the door and came back, holding a letter in her hand. Dr. Meade was not in sight.

"What is it Prissy?" Scarlett demanded, taking the offered letter. With shaky fingers she saw it was from Tara and opened it quickly. It read:

_Suellen ill. Please come to Tara._

Sighing, she felt a flood or relief. It wasn't Mammy or Will, only bratty Suellen. Yet, it seemed urgent for why else would they send for her? Despite the fact that Suellen and her had never been on good terms, fear flooded her and she stuffed the letter in her pocket.

"Prissy, I'm going to the post office," she said in a low voice. "If. Dr. Meade arrives before I return, have him stay…"

Putting on her coat, she quickly left out the door, her mind trying to figure out what the illness could be. For Suellen in her right mind would have never let Will wire her to come to Tara. Their relationship had never been a good one, even as young girls.

The air was chilly as Scarlet quickly walked down Peachtree Street and made her way to the post office. It seemed as fate had pushed her going back to Tara even as she wanted to return. She wondered what would meet her as she sent Will a wire telling him she would come as soon as possible.

After that, she went to purchase three tickets for the children and her from the Atlanta depot. Tomorrow they would be on the first train bound for Tara.

XXX

Dr. Meade came to the Butler mansion precisely at noon the same day. Scarlett was only fifteen minutes late and came in, taking off her coat and gloves. Prissy was by the door.

"Is Dr. Meade here?" she asked, still gasping for air from her quick, brisk walk in the cold.

"Yes'm. He got ah here a little bit ago. He is waitin' in de parlor."

Scarlett walked in the direction of the parlor. Coming to the door, she pushed the heavy door open to find Dr. Meade sitting down. He looked up at her with a twitch of his moustache. His face a little more aged and gruff then she could remember.

"Dr. Meade," she acknowledged and swallowed. "I'm sorry. But Suellen is ill and I had to send a wire to Tara."

"How ill is she?" he asked, his thick white brows drawing together.

"I'm sure she's fine," Scarlett off handily said. "Suellen is simply pregnant and about to give birth any second. Dr. Fontaine will look after her."

"Now, why did you send for me, young lady?" he asked, getting back to the situation as any doctor would. "Are you ill?"

"I have been under the weather since our last meeting. Nothing has changed but-"

The old man eyed her thoughtfully. "Sit down, Scarlett."

Once she had, he walked over to her and listened to her heartbeat and did a few simple procedures. "Everything seems fine," he muttered. "What were the symptoms?"

She told him frankly. It was dizziness, retching and nausea. The sleepless nights were due to Rhett so she kept them put of the picture. He nodded as she told him and he seemed to think, stroking his moustache.

"When was your last course, Scarlett?"

She flushed. "Well, why it was…" trailing off, she shot him a helpless look. "Not since the beginning of December."

And as she stated the fact, a thought came into her mind. Could she be… pregnant? Yet, it didn't seem as if she would. After all, wouldn't she have sensed it? Her courses were often sporadic anyway due to stress and she hadn't paid much attention to those sorts of things, at least not like fashion or business.

She was spending sleepless nights in Rhett's room and her days charming the old guard. There wasn't any rest for her, so it was normal and likely that she was simply exhausted and stressed. Pushing those thoughts aside, she thought it was ridiculous.

"Dr. Meade," she began. "I'm simply tired and have been under stress. But everything is just fine and dandy. I don't look like I'm dying do I? I am as fit as a horse."

"Oh, you're not dying," he said with a smile. "Quite the opposite in fact."

Her brows drew together. "What on earth do you mean? Have I a cold?"

"You're last course was December and now it's February." A knowing smile came to his lips. "Do you mean to tell me, Scarlett that a woman who has borne three children doesn't know when she is in the family way?"

Scarlett gaped at him. "But I- I that is… Oh, Dr. Meade are you serious?"

He laughed. "Of course, young lady. I haven't been a doctor all these years to not notice the signs. I'm sure when Captain Butler returns he will be very pleased."

Shaking her head, her mind swirled. The wire from Tara and the news she was pregnant was all too much. Those nights Rhett and her made love, she had become pregnant on or after Christmas. It all made sense yet she couldn't digest it. The shock must have shown on her face for the doctor patted her hand.

"I once told you Scarlett after Bonnie died to give Captain Butler another child as soon as possible. Think of this child as a blessing and a second chance. If you need me I will be here… I shall show myself out."

The sound of the door closing jarred her and she flew to her feet, opening the door and trailing after him. "Dr. Meade!"

The man stopped and turned back towards her expectantly, holding his doctor bag in one hand.

She grabbed his sleeve. "You won't tell anyone, will you? That is, I would like to tell Rhett myself. He is in Charleston and-"

"Not to worry," he assured her. "I won't tell anyone. But I would get Captain Butler back to Atlanta as fast as you can for the child's sake."

The child. Hearing it made the baby more real. As Dr. Meade left, in a daze she walked towards the parlor, her mind continuing to spin. Hand going to her flat stomach, she let out a shuddering sigh. Rhett and her would have a child again and she wasn't certain if she was elated or upset about the fact.

It was true she had wanted the baby she had lost. But since then, Rhett and her relationship and deteriorated. He had made it clear he hadn't wanted the baby either and how things were now between them, he wouldn't want this baby either. Yet, he had always been crazy about babies and if she showed him what a good mother she was he would love her.

She could write him a letter and he would return speedily. For now she didn't know if she wanted the baby but she accepted it as fact. For now she would keep the secret close to her heart and in a few days she would wire him. He would come back, he just had to.

Thoughts of Rhett and her standing over a baby filled her mind, just like Bonnie, as happy and beautiful as she had been, with just as strong a spirit. And with each passing thought of what could be, she found a slight smile come to her lips as she walked over to the steps and sat at the bottom.

Once she had cried brokenly on these very steps and had lain brokenly at the bottom after falling. But she had triumphed and she was still alive. She had won and Rhett and her were going to have a baby. A bond that even Rhett couldn't deny. The very part of them, which would in time drive them together. She hadn't lost Rhett even yet.

As soon as she returned from Tara she would wire him. Glancing at the clock, she saw that she had time to begin packing before she would have to go pick up the children and later she would go to the awful sewing circle with the old guard… then she would be on her way to Tara.

Walking up the stairs, slowly she came to the top. Somehow she was beckoned to the nursery and hadn't been there many times since Bonnie had died… that had been seven months ago. It seemed like forever ago, and now by August, Rhett and her would have another child.

Pushing the nursery door open, she came to sit in a chair. Remembering the laughter she had once heard from this room. Of Rhett's deep laugh and Bonnie's high giggle. It had depressed her before but now she was elated. Before the noise had gotten on her nerves then but now she could imagine Rhett and their baby as Bonnie and him had been.

"I'll be the best mother ever," she declared, placing a hand on her stomach. "And Rhett will come back. He just has to…"

TBC


	43. Suellen

Part 43

Note: Thank you six people for the wonderful reviews. You all are amazing. I would also love to give a special thanks to my new beta, Hepzibah Smith who encouraged me and looked over this chapter for any mistakes. Thank you.

Many of you will be happy about the next chapter for Rhett will make an appearance. So please enjoy and review.

Part 43

"Scarlett, Suellen is dying," Will whispered to her. That was the first words Scarlett heard as she came into Tara with Ella and Wade following her in. Will's face was drawn and pale as if hell's fire had burned him, leaving him only a semblance of the happy go lucky man he had been, not the one who had been so sure of everything during the war.

The children looked petrified and Cookie came, dragging them away to the other bedroom in which Scarlett had inhabited as a young girl, where her childhood innocence had long been swept away by the war. It was so dim in the house and it reminded her of the morning Melanie had died. She blinked as she quietly looked at him.

"What happened?"

He nodded for her to go with him towards the stairs. Grabbing the banister, Scarlett looked around in a daze but brought her gaze back to the exhausted Will. His throat worked as he let out a sigh.

"She has been in labor for two days. Scarlett, it's been the hardest labor and the doctor says if she doesn't have the baby soon she'll die."

Die? Scarlett couldn't grasp the fact. What she needed was Mammy. She needed to rest her head against the breast she hadn't been comforted for four months, the last time she had seen Mammy. It had been too long; she always had Mammy with her except for the early days of the war.

"Where is Mammy?" she asked, licking her chapped lips. "I need to see her."

He stared at her quizzically. "In with Sue… I'll go get her."

They had made it to the top of the stairs. Pausing in front of the door, Will went in, Scarlett catching a glimpse of the darkened room and Suellen on the bed. The door shut behind him and she seemed to wait forever.

The hall seemed suffocating and she moved to rest against the wall. Her eyes riveted on the door as she felt the walls close in on her and she could scarcely breathe. Tightening her fists, the nails dug into her palm. Closing her eyes, she waited, but her eyes flew when the sound of the creaking floor sounded. The door opened and she saw Mammy waddle out, looking infinitely older.

But Scarlett didn't stay still, with an ecstatic cry she ran to Mammy, throwing herself in her arms. She laid her head on her chest, as deep sobs racked her body.

"Mammy," Scarlett whispered. "Suellen…"

"Dar, dar, honey. Ole' Mammy is here. Ah missed you mah dear sweet lam'. Doan ya be cryin' now Miss Scarlett, ya doan want to be worrying the children Miss Suellen will be fine."

_But how do you know? _Scarlett wanted to cry; yet she merely nodded, tiredly resting against Mammy. The old woman continued to soothe her but peered down at her mistress.

"Where is Mistha Rhett?"

"In Charleston. Oh Mammy, everything has changed. I can't bear it anymore and I-" she paused, realizing she was about to admit she was carrying Rhett's child. But she couldn't tell anyone now. Not now.

"I understand, mah lamb," Mammy tiredly said. "My poor chile. Mistha Rhett will see dat he still loves ya."

The words did little to comfort Scarlett. But she moved away from Mammy and asked, "How bad is Suellen really, Mammy?"

The black eyes flickered, speaking clearer then any words would. "Mah lamb, Miss Suellen is sicker then ya ever were durin' chile birth. I ain't ever seen a woman sicker, not even Miss Ellen when she gabe birth to de boys."

"Let me take over," Scarlett suddenly said. "Please, Mammy. I helped Melly give birth and I know I could-I hope that I can help Sue."

"Mah lamb never liked nursin', not like Miss Ellen."

"I know. But Sue needs me and I must do something or I'll go crazy. You can take care of Wade and Ella while I am in with Sue… Has the doctor been sent for?"

Mammy nodded. "Doctor Fontaine was here, Miss Scarlett but he done left after he came. He said dat Miss Suellen had no hope. I bout cried my eyes out at dat. She is mah youngest girl dat still is with us."

"Yes, yes I know," Scarlett distractedly said, her hand at her chin in thought. "Well, I shall prove the doctor wrong. I will go in Mammy and said Cookie to me. Two pairs of hands are better then one."

Leaving, Mammy went to do her bidding. When she opened the door, she saw Will, sitting at Suellen's bedside and looking beside himself. He rose up at seeing her advance in the room, his eyes bleak.

"I will help Sue, Will," Scarlett assured him, coming to stand beside him and put her hand on his arm comfortingly. "I'll need you to leave."

Opening his mouth as if to protest, he closed it and shuddered. Nodding, he left the room and once the door was closed, Scarlett turned back to Suellen's bedside. The shallow rise and fall of her sister's chest, made Scarlett go closer to the bedside to observe her sister.

The eyes were open and glassy. Also there was sweat beading on her forehead and she had the sheets twisted in her fingers each time she had a contraction and her face twisted in pain before she looked up at Scarlett.

"Came to gloat?" she asked through gritted teeth.

"No, only to help you."

The eyes that stared back up at her blazed in a pale face. "You've all ready helped enough. You stole Frank from me and anything else that would have made me happy. I hate you."

The words hurt but Scarlett swallowed a sharp retort. "Just let me help you."

Suellen was about to reply when another pain shot through her and she cried out, biting her lip so hard Scarlett winced.

"Please, Scarlett… H-help me. The pain, the pain hurts so bad."

Scarlett's head snapped up, seeing tears coursing down Suellen's ghostly cheeks. Her mind drifted to the time when Suellen was five and had tired to follow her up a tree, only for the branch to give way under her in which she had fell. Suellen had sobbed and tattled to Mammy that she had been climbing trees. Since that day, she hadn't seen Suellen cry as hysterically. Sobs wracked her body, and even Scarlett was moved to pity and sat down, grabbing Suellen's hand.

"You'll be fine, Sue," she assured her sister. "You'll have this baby."

Thinking about her own baby briefly, Scarlett knew she wouldn't let this baby die. Just as she wouldn't have let Beau and if it would have been her power Melanie wouldn't have miscarried but would have had dozens of babies. And she wouldn't have lost Rhett's baby by the fall.

Rising to her feet, just as Cookie came in, she ordered the woman to get a ball of twine, towels and boiling water. Thank heavens Prissy wasn't here, she would have someone who was reliable and level headed to aid her, unlike when Melanie had given right and Prissy had whined.

Going back to Suellen's side, she surprisingly took her sister's rough hand in hers and gently rubbed it with her thumb.

"You'll be fine, Sue. I know you will."

But somehow icy fear still clutched her. And her voice didn't sound as sure as she would have liked. The truth was, Scarlett didn't know if Sue would be well again or if the whole world would be for that matter.

XXX

Again, Scarlett played nurse. She was at Suellen's side and had been for the past few hours. A towel in her hand, she wiped Suellen's forehead and chatted with her. Yet, Suellen was barely conscious and seemed to be slipping away with startling speed.

So much so, that raw fear filled Scarlett. Always she had been in control but for once she was coming to see she wasn't certain if she could save Suellen. Though, she was trying her hardest.

"You must push, Suellen," Scarlett urged. The baby was so close in coming.

Suellen began to cry. Scarlett hadn't seen her truly cry since they were little. But she ignored it and grabbed Suellen's arm. "Push, Suellen. You must, you hear me."

"I hate you!" she screamed but cringed as she pushed.

The baby came with blood and a cry that filled the room as Suellen went slack against the bed. Cookie took over and Scarlett watched as the baby was placed in a blanket.

Scarlett went over to Suellen. Her sister lay unmoving and her face ghastly. Peering into her face, Scarlett shook her gently.

"Sue, its all over," she breathed. "You can wake up and see your baby. It's a boy."

"A boy," she whispered, her voice fainter and light. There was a moment of triumph in her tired face but her head lolled. "Scarlett, I hated you so much my whole life. Even now when I'm dying I can't bring myself to love you, like I don't love Will."

The look Scarlett gave Sue was shocked. "Don't be silly, Sue. You'll get better and you'll be up in no time."

Realizing she was crying, she dashed her tears away. Suellen merely gave her a pitying look and let out a sigh.

"I'll see mother again and pa. I know you t-think I killed him. I never wanted pa to die…"

Suellen trailed off as she laid her head back down on the pillow and closed her eyes. Suddenly, she grasped Scarlett's hand in a death tight grip and a scared look filled her sallow face.

"Tell Will good-bye for me."

Scarlett tried to pull her hand from Suellen's. "I'll go get him…"

"No," Suellen vehemently said. "Stay with me, Scarlett. It's the least-you could do now. Did you really love Frank?"

"What? I- that is in my own way. But Frank always loved you. Even in the end and in our marriage. I only did it to save Tara, surely you understand."

"No, I don't," she breathed. "And I will always hate you for it. Did you think I'd really let you go off guilt free?"

Scarlett miserably shook her head. "I don't expect a thing from you, Suellen."

The eyes were unflinching as they looked at her. "Let me see my son. His name will be William."

Cookie, who had been waiting near the bed with the baby in hand, brought the baby to Suellen and set the small child in the crook of her arm. Suellen looked at the baby with no look of love, only a look of one who was eyeing a stranger or animal.

"Take him," she ordered, and then looked at Scarlett once the baby was gone. Her blue eyes searched her sisters as if trying to have one last memory of the sister she had despised. But her face wasn't full of venom only acceptance and infinite exhaustion.

Eyes fluttered closed and one last breath filled the room. And Susan Elinor O'Hara Benteen died alone with a sister she had hated, a darkie holding a child she hadn't wanted and had resented. The baby cried as if realizing it was motherless and Scarlett could feel the tears fill her eyes as she raced out of the room.

Mammy was in the hall way as Scarlett came out, a wild look on her face as she pushed past Mammy and raced down the stairs. Feeling like she couldn't breathe as she raced out the front door, down the porch steps.

The dirt was cold under her slippers as bitter air assaulted her. Taking deep breaths, she found herself in front of her mother's headstone and she fell to her knees, her head resting against the hard slab. Crying as she realized she had lost yet another person a part of her. Suellen had hated her to the end and she had failed grievously as she had failed with Rhett and Melanie.

She wanted to die. But the only thing she could remember was she had this baby who would be born and a part of Rhett and her. Desperately she wanted her mother and Rhett. She couldn't have Ellen, but Rhett she could… Silently she mourned for her sister, even as she silently prayed Rhett would come to her when she called for him. The tears continued to flow as she sat in the cemetery, feeling colder then she had since the war.

TBC


	44. Rhett Returns

Note: Once again thank you to my reviewers and my beta. Also to those who pointed out any typos because I always miss a lot. Here is the chappie with Rhett in it so enjoy and please review.

Part 44

Scarlett happened to be standing near the window for her mother's office, as was her occasion since Suellen had died. She would stand there for hours without realizing the time had passed. Mostly, she would stare off into space and try not to think about Rhett abandoning her and that Suellen was dead. So, that cold morning, she stood by the window and one wouldn't have known someone was in the room, not one muscle moved. However, the billowing of dust captured her attention outside. Her breath stopped for she knew the carriage, it was the Butler's own private carriage. She knew it was Rhett.

Mixed emotions filled her, elation but a calm feeling that surprisingly wouldn't let her move or rush down to him. Something within her constrained her mind and body, where she wasn't acting as she used to. Knowing she had taken a chance by sending him a wire all the way to France when he might have not received it in time or could blatantly refuse her call for him. As it was, it had taken him a week to arrive.

Life had been a nightmare since Suellen had died. Scarlett was filled with guilt about the rift in her and Sue's relationship, which had never been fixed. The fact was she failed in saving Suellen, something she would never forgive herself for. Added to another long list of grievances she had committed.

Everyone looked to her, lost and needing to know what had to be done. The funeral came, and she waited for Rhett. She watched, clear-eyed during the funeral as everyone from Atlanta who had known Suellen came. India, Ashley and Beau arrived together; India of course shooting her glares as if to say everything bad in the world was Scarlett's own fault. The old guard hadn't bothered, since they hadn't been acquainted with the O'Hara kin. Ellen and Gerald had lived in relative isolation in Clayton County and their deaths hadn't improved relations.

What family that was left of the Fountains and Tarltons shuffled over to keep their neighborly duty. It was a simple ceremony with a priest that had led Ellen's nine years before. Scarlett had poured as much money into the funeral as Will would allow her, mostly to appease her guilt and so that people wouldn't call her cheap. It wasn't love for her sister that had driven her to pay, but the feeling of guilt. Wishing that in some way she could make amends.

The constant sound of Suellen's girls' crying along with Mammy's profuse weeping caused Scarlett to lock herself in Ellen's office for a few days.

_"Ah done lost another one of mah girls," Mammy mourned "Miss Carreen to the convent, Miss Ellen to the Lord and now He done take Miss Suellen. Promise me mah lamb yous will never leave ole Mammy."_

_"Oh Mammy," Scarlett tiredly said, her face drawn. "You know I could never leave you. Oh, what shall I do? Now I have Suellen's four children on my hands and her share of Tara. It rightfully belongs to Will."_

_"You speak to Mistha Will and he will make a good decision."_

_Scarlett knew Will had always been levelheaded but she didn't know at this point how he would act when overcome with grief. So Mammy left and Will came into Ellen's office, looking sicker then he had ever been._

_"Will," Scarlett gently began. "I need to know your plans. Will you continue to stay at Tara?"_

_"I could never leave Tara," he tiredly said._

_Nodding, she knew just what Will meant. The share of Tara was rightfully his and she wouldn't refuse him is share of the land. _

_After their talk, Will left out to the fields again and the barn. Scarlett watched him from the window as he strolled the bleak land and refused to acknowledge the grave in which his wife lay._

A week later, Scarlett was still at Tara. Her constant fixture seemed to be in the office and she rarely ate. The nausea came fiercer until she realized she couldn't let herself be run down. She needed to take care of herself for the baby. Placing a hand on her flat stomach, she could scarcely believe there was a life in her. A baby. Rhett's and hers. Even though Rhett had helped her create this baby, she was beginning to feel this child would only be hers. Something that would belong to her and that she could love, as Rhett had pointed out numerous times and occasions that Bonnie had belonged to him.

Her eyes took in the sight of Will making his way alone again outside across the land. The graves were plain in her sight and she clutched the curtains from her place by the window. Scarlett was startled when she saw the black carriage pull up. The man who exited the carriage was unmistakable and her heart lodged in her throat as she saw his wide shoulders. The wide Panama hat and the body she had known so well was a telltale sign it was Rhett. She would know him anywhere and she released her grip from the curtains.

However, she didn't rush out as she wanted to, but forced herself to sit at her desk and calmly wait for his arrival. It wasn't long before the creaking of the floor could be heard, signifying Mammy was coming. Then a knock on the door.

"Miss Scarlett, Mistha Rhett is here."

"Show him in Mammy," Scarlett said in a calm voice, jumping when the door flew open and Rhett appeared. He couldn't have been two steps behind Mammy.

For a moment she couldn't breathe. She nearly cried from the mere sight of him. It was as if a burden had been removed from her. She had missed him so and she searched his eyes and face, every line and expression. There was evident concern for her well being and she took a brief comfort in it even if it wasn't burning love she wanted.

"I'm so sorry, Scarlett," he sincerely said. "I came as soon as I could but France isn't close as you well know."

Tears came to her eyes at his understanding. She sniffled as she buried her face in her hand. "I know. Oh Rhett it was so awful. She still hated me, even at the end. I couldn't save her. I tired, I really did."

Rhett strode across the room and came next to her, leaning over to hand her a handkerchief and place a hand on her shoulder. "I know you did, Scarlett. Mammy told me and you mustn't blame yourself."

Drawing strength from his touch, she looked up at him. "I never wanted her to die. She was my baby sister, Rhett. Not sweet like Carreen, but-still my sister."

"I know," he quietly said.

It was as if he had never left her. As if they had never quarreled and she hadn't left Charleston because of his scene with Sally Bright. All that was forgotten and he was once again her confidant and the man who had once slightly cared for her. Even in her slight grief-stricken state, Rhett looked so handsome, the puffiness completely gone from his face and an endearing solemnity about him, as if he understood her feelings completely.

"Rhett, I need you," she murmured. "Will is always out in the field and the children are crying… I'm going mad. I don't know what I shall do… "

"I'm here, Scarlett," he gently told her. "I can't be here long though. I came by to make sure the children and you were fine before I left for London."

A sick feeling washed over her. Her eyes met his and she begged for him to know she was carrying his child and for him to see how much she needed and loved him. But he didn't seem to know or care for he sighed and looked away.

"If you don't mind, it was a long trip and I would like to see the children…"

"I understand," she numbly said. "Please leave." Turning her head away from his gaze. "You can stay tonight but your presence after that is no longer needed."

"I see. I'm surprised Ashley isn't here."

She turned on him, her eyes full of fire. "You jealous fool. How dare you accuse me of being unfaithful when my sister just died? I hate you! I hate you!"

In a flash she was on her feet, nearly knocking the chair over, the chair her mother had sat peacefully so many times. But she couldn't hold in the anger that had been building for months and beat at his chest, tears were streaming down her face. Nausea rolled through her and she felt faint as she fought him as she had when he had made her look like a fool in the Yankee prison. She used her hands and even tried to kick him.

Blood pounded through her ears and she could feel herself feeling fainter. The world dimmed and she felt him catch her, his face over hers and he was calling her name. She was only aware she couldn't see for a moment but could hear his voice dimly.

When she came to, he was cradling her in his arms. _The baby. _This was her first thought but she seemed fine, only a brief fainting spell, no doubt from lack of sleep and nourishment. She hated her weakness and tried to pull away from him but he held her still.

"Let me go," she weakly said, cringing at how she sounded. As soon as she left Tara, she would call on the doctor. She would do nothing to risk the baby's life.

Seeing the struggle on his face, Scarlett felt very little pity for him. All she could muster up was resentment and wariness. Once she would have followed him to the moon, now before her was a stranger. A man, who pretended to care for priorities sake, yet had not an ounce of love for her. Time and time again these past four months, he had done everything in his power to push her away.

As soon as he released her, she was back on her feet, not looking at him for she knew if she did she would cave in. One flicker of his eyes or a caring look would turn her into a puddle at his feet.

"You can stay the night and for supper. But after that," she softly finished, averting her eyes, "You can leave. Our marriage is over just as you wanted and I suppose I will be even richer. It's convenient isn't it?"

"Yes, I suppose so. And you can have anything your heart desires. More money and Ashley Wilkes."

Her eyes met his finally, but they didn't hold happiness, only a bored acceptance. "I'll have something, yes, Rhett. Something I always desperately wanted. Someone who will love me."

She meant the baby but Rhett didn't know. Of course he only thought she meant Ashley and merely nodded crisply.

"See you tonight, Mrs. Butler." Then he was gone, leaving Scarlett alone, going back to the window to stare vacantly out. Tears wouldn't come as she placed her hand on her stomach and leaned her forehead against the cool glass.

XXX

Supper was quiet, as could be expected. The girls whined, wanting Suellen and Will left wordlessly halfway through the meal out the front door. Even Mammy wasn't the usual loud terror at the dinner table. It was far too quiet.

Even Rhett had tried to engage people in conversation, but the silence proceeded until he turned his attention on her. His eyes fastened to hers. In turn, her eyes searched his and when she didn't find what she so desperately wanted, she turned away, her appetite gone.

Excusing herself without even a glance towards the children, she sought her childhood room. The girls had used it until they had become older. Now it was a guest room, the room she always slept in during her visits to Tara.

Later, as she lay in bed, her hand on her stomach, Rhett came in. Luckily he didn't notice her hand as she moved it away and stared at him quietly.

"I take it we're sharing a room for the night?" he asked.

"Yes," was all she said as he shed his clothes, even in the dead of winter. He was naked and she swallowed as he moved beside her, sitting down he moved under the covers. This was her childhood bed and had seemed big to her as a girl, but with a man who seemed to take it up, it was small, so small that their bodies touched. She sucked in her breath. For an insane moment she thought of telling Rhett about the baby.

"Rhett," she began in the darkness.

"Yes?" he impatiently asked.

She fell silent. "Nothing."

No, she couldn't tell him about the baby. He would either accuse her of sleeping with Ashley or worst he would say he didn't want the child, just as he had when she had fallen down the stairs. Both scenarios would be devastating. Besides, he deserved to know what it felt for a child to favor one parent over the other. This baby would love her and maybe in time she could forget about Rhett.

Yet she was afraid. Rhett didn't hate her but didn't love her either. It was a neutral feeling and she couldn't bear it. She needed love or hate, some emotion she could comprehend or understand…

XXX

It was cold hands on her feet that awoke Scarlett with a start. She yelped and sat up, glaring at the intruder that had awoken her from her deep sleep. She saw it was Rhett and he was grinning at her. It registered in her mind he had done this ritually in the early days of their marriage. He would kiss her or give her some sort of token to appease her.

If there was one thing she hated it was getting woken up. She threw her pillow at him with blurry eyes and fell back on the bed. "Go away," she said with a muffled voice. She still hadn't forgotten how rudely he had treated her.

The only response was a laugh from him. Hearing his footsteps, she sighed and knew he was only getting closer to the bed. He wouldn't leave her alone for he tugged at her blanket insistently as a child would do. Burying her face deeper in the pillow, she tried to block him out.

"I'm mad at you still," she mumbled. The room was dim with light from the sunrise. But she didn't notice such things. She only knew it was an ungodly hour and Rhett was being infuriating.

"I want to show you something," he said.

She heard his voice and sighed. She blinked drowsily and rolled over on her side, looking up at him. He looked as if he hadn't slept a wink but was as well groomed as ever. This time he was dressed and had his normal clothes on. His shirt was open slightly, showing enough of his chest that made her swallow. She berated herself… How could she be so attracted to him even when she was barley conscious to her surroundings?

"Very well," she said peevishly. "What is it that you would pull me out of bed?"

He offered his hand and she took it with a sigh. Yet, she couldn't deny she was curious and holding his hand was heaven. It was warm and seemed to enfold her, as did his eyes. He drew her by the window and pulled back the curtains. Looking out she didn't see anything.

"What is it?" she asked, her eyes scanning the semi-dark surroundings.

"Have you ever seen a sky like that?" he asked.

She looked at the wide expanse of the horizon and was taken aback by the simple beauty. She hadn't seen many sunrises but this one was beautiful. The sky was a pale gray color with clouds scattered across the morning. But they were the brightest pink she had ever seen and were startling against the color of the rising sun.

Feeling Rhett watching her, she turned to face him. His face was clothed in the slight darkness, but she could see his features. The features she hadn't given much thought to. His broad forehead, dark eyes, swarthy face and full lips. There was a peaceful look about him. Not mocking, angry or unreadable. He took joy from seeing the sky and he had wanted to share it with her! Even at this ungodly hour, she felt a slight happiness.

"Thank you, Rhett," she murmured. "You are right. I have never seen a sky like this." She slumped slightly against the wall.

"Let's get you back to bed," he quietly said.

She nodded as she let him lead her to bed like a child. She sat down and slipped her legs beneath the coverlets as he tucked her in as he had done with the children. He was slightly bent over her, his chest strong and so close that she could feel the heat of his body and wanted to place her hands on his skin.

She remembered placing her head on that chest. How she had taken it for granted! But now she desperately wanted to rest her head against him. She knew she didn't want him to reject her again but in her sleeping state she threw all caution out and was too tired to care what she said.

"Rhett will you do something for me if I asked? Will you hold me?"

She saw the guarded look come to his eyes and nearly berated herself for speaking out. She lowered her eyes briefly and sighed.

"Don't look at me like that, Rhett. It's not as if I will attack you or expect you to make love to me. It's just that I am cold, and well-" she trailed off, knowing she was making a fool of herself.

But she was surprised when Rhett sat on the edge of the bed and lifted his long legs, stretching out on the bed and turning over until they were face to face. He seemed to take up the whole bed and she felt her heart flutter as her eyes met his.

When his arms moved around her, he pulled her near to him and she sighed as she rested her head against his chest. She could hear his heart beat. She closed her eyes and for a moment she could pretend that he had said that he loved her.

Tilting her head back, she looked up at him and saw his eyes were open. He looked at her, his eyes very serious.

"Rhett, will anything ever be as it was between us?" she asked hopefully.

He sighed deeply and stroked her hair. "I'm not a mind reader, but no, Scarlett, those days are gone. Time can't be changed even though we wish it could. I meant what I said."

Her body stiffened and a deep anguish pierced her heart. She couldn't, wouldn't believe it. But she felt the hot tears in her eyes as she looked away from his eyes and placed her head on his chest.

"And I meant what I said," she said with conviction, "Every word of it."

She didn't expect him to reply. Her eyes remained open for a long time before that began to drift close and she fell asleep with the knowledge that Rhett's body was close to her but he held his heart away from her.

TBC


	45. An overdue post

Note: Wow this is a long overdue post; I cannot even remember the last time I posted a new chapter. Once again thank you to my beta that so kindly looks over my work and gets back to me. Also to my readers who encouraged me to continue and those who begged for more. I have lost inspiration but hopefully I will get more inspiration soon. Enjoy and please review.

Part 45

Scarlett awoke alone, blinking against the harsh noon light. She thought she had only dreamed of being in Rhett's arms, but she knew it wasn't a dream or some figment of her imagination, although she had dreamt it many times these past few months. Dreams so vivid, they gave the appearance of being reality. Remembering what Rhett had said, she felt a slight sick feeling in her stomach. Nothing was turning out as she had hoped.

Coming downstairs for breakfast after hurriedly getting dressed, she watched the last moments of Rhett with Wade and Ella play out. Weariness assaulted her and hurt stabbed her chest. The children seemed devastated that he was leaving again and questioned when he would return. Of course he gave them evasive answers and it angered her. She had to bite her lip to keep silent, and this was no easy task.

As he prepared to leave and his bags were placed in his carriage, she waited out on the porch, the children beside her. Scarlett contemplated screaming or begging for him to stay. But she wouldn't beg, to do so would only degrade her more. Stiffly she waited, the children beside her as Rhett came up to give them their final good-byes.

Ella clutched Rhett to her and was crying as usual. Scarlett watched Wade as he slightly hugged Rhett before despondently turning away and going back into the house. As a mother who had felt very little for her children, she summoned sadness and pity for the boy. He had never known a father, and the only one he had known was leaving him once again, with no explanation.

Anger against Rhett resurfaced like an old, festering wound. The love that she had felt for him was replaced by a momentary resentment. As he walked up to her, no visible emotion showed on her face. Yet, she swallowed and forced herself to not stare at him too long or too hard. When she felt his hand upon her shoulder, it was torture and then and only then did she let her eyes meet his.

"Take care of yourself, Scarlett. I'll send the papers, but in the meanwhile, I will return in a month or so to keep up appearances."

Her eyes rose up to his, as if in a dream. Staring blankly at him, she didn't say a word, she couldn't. Nodding, she turned on her heel and left him without looking back. She heard him calling her, but she ignored him, going into the house and shutting the door behind her. Resting her back against the cold surface, she heard the sound of the horses' hooves and the carriage as it pulled away.

Leaning forward, she placed one foot before the other to go to her mother's office, her constant sanctuary where she allowed herself to think. In a short time, she knew Mammy would follow her in but until then, she would reach some semblance of control and figure out what her next move was.

She always had a plan. It might come at the last moment but she always had something to fall back on. No matter whether it was crude planning or common sense. So she knew even then at this darkest hour, she would come up with something. She had to or else she would go crazy.

"Oh what shall I do?" she whispered to herself as she sat at the desk, her fingers drumming against the mahogany tabletop.

As if in step with her mistress's thoughts, Mammy bounded down the hall.  
The sound of the creaking of wood floated to Scarlett's ears. Looking up  
as the door opened, it was Mammy. The old woman gave her a knowing look.

"I have to leave Mammy," Scarlett tiredly announced, knowing her statement was true as she placed her hands against her temples. "I just have to, there are too many memories…but where shall I go? Charleston is unthinkable and Savannah…" she trailed off and her eyes flickered, as if she had a moment of realization. "Savannah."

Mammy adamantly shook her head. "Der's nothin' in Savannah fer ya. It wasn't kind to Miss Ellen and it wouldn't be good fer ya, Miss Scarlett. Yer place is here with ole Mammy and at Tara."

But Scarlett wasn't listening. Her grandfather Pierre Robillard lived in Savannah. It's true she could never stand the old man and he had blatantly refused to give her money all those years ago to pay the taxes on Tara. She despised the old man yet it was a prospect. He was shrewd and rich like her. No doubt they could reach some sort of agreement. After all, wasn't blood thicker than water?

The thought of bringing the children with her caused her to waver. She needed time alone and a chance to reach the peace she hadn't had since she was a child. There was no point of pulling the children out of school, although she knew at Savannah she could hire a tutor until they returned to Atlanta…But still, she chose to put her own desires above what the children would want.

"I think the children should stay here," she finally voiced. "For school and to be at Tara... Pierre Robillard wouldn't take kindly to me bringing myself let alone two extra mouths to feed, the greedy old man. He wouldn't even loan me enough money to pay the taxes on Tara."

"You can't leave your chillun," Mammy muttered.

A frown came to Scarlett's lips as she rose to her feet. "I can and I will. The children will be better off here with you to take care of them."

"I'm getting' too old, Miss Scarlett," Mammy shortly said. "And Mistha Will ain't all there. Ya can't just run off and leave dem here. I doan tole you that…"

Disregarding what Mammy said, Scarlett eyed her with the first stubborn look she had given since Suellen had died. "You either let them stay here or I'll leave them in Atlanta with Ashley Wilkes."

"And have all that gossip?" Mammy demanded. "Mark mah words, Miss Scarlett, if ya did dat, Mistha Rhett would be as mad as a bear. And when he finds out ya have run off to Savannah…"

"He won't though because you shan't tell him. Rhett isn't to know where I'm at, Mammy. Let him suffer. I don't care what he thinks anymore. He can contact me through Henry Hamilton if he needs to. I'm leaving tomorrow, Mammy, and there is all that there is to it."

The old woman sighed. "Mah lamb is stubborn. Yer chilluns place is with ya but I will take care of dem. This ole Mammy is too tired to fight with you."

Briefly, Scarlett felt guilty. But she pushed it aside as she went over to Mammy and gave her a peck on her weathered cheek.

XXX

"Why are you leaving us?" Wade asked. His eyes usually calm were now slightly accusing. "Why can't we go with you?"

Scarlett sighed. "Wade, I can't stay at Tara anymore. Ella and you need to stay in school. So you both shall return to Atlanta with Mammy. You'll stay with Aunt Pitty."

"I don't want to," he said, "Just because you don't want to be our mother, doesn't mean that you can abandon us like Uncle Rhett did!"

Her hand actually rose, as if she would slap him and then, as she realized what she was about to do, her hand fell back to her side. She couldn't slap Wade anymore then she could bring herself to hate Rhett.

"I don't appreciate your tone, Wade," she coldly said, her jaw set, "As your mother, you shall listen to me. Tomorrow we will go to the Atlanta depot where Uncle Peter will be waiting for Ella and you. And I will go to Savannah to visit your great-grandfather."

"How long?" he whispered, his head bent.

"I don't know," Scarlett tiredly said as she turned to leave, not able to reassure her son. Never had she been a good mother and despite her valiant efforts, she couldn't muster the strength. "I just don't know, Wade."

As she left the room, she noticed Mammy was standing in the hallway with an accusatory look. Scarlett didn't care and wouldn't let her conscious plague her. Now she had to find Ella and let her daughter know she was leaving her with the Hamiltons.

Finding Ella didn't prove to be hard. She was in the backyard sitting on the first limb of a bare tree. Scarlett had climbed that tree many times as a child. Upon closer inspection, Scarlett saw Ella's face was still stained with tears from Rhett's earlier departure hours earlier.

Walking up to the tree, she looked up at Ella and motioned for her to come down. Ella obeyed with a despondent sigh and grabbed a branch, climbing down. She nearly toppled over but caught herself. Instinctively, Scarlett picked a piece of bark and a leaf out of Ella's badly snarled hair, observing it with a look of disgust. Her truly hair needed a good washing and brushing, but she would worry about that later.

"I need to speak with you, Ella," she began. "Mother is going to Savannah for awhile to visit your great-grandfather."

The small lips trembled. "Are me and Wade going with you?"

"No, you both shall go to Atlanta and stay with Aunt Pittypat."

Tears fell to Ella's cheeks. Without even a word she ran past Scarlett, nearly tripping. With a sigh, Scarlett turned and watched as Ella run up the stairs and slam the door behind her. Cringing, Scarlett turned and let her eyes wander across the winter frost of the grass to the gray sky and over the desolate land.

XXX

Rhett flipped through the stack of letters he had received from Belle since leaving Atlanta. Most of them were lighthearted and teasing, yet most of them made mention of Scarlett. What she was up to or how she looked. Some of the things that Belle said, such as Scarlett was seen walking with the old guard, were too much for him to even believe. Despite the fact he had seen her with his own eyes, he was curious as to what was going on in that mind of hers. She had let him leave Tara too easily.

Could it be that she was giving up? But no, Scarlett was like a bulldog and never gave up until she had something within her grasp. A feeling of pity for all that she had lost welled up in him. Of course it could have been the grief of losing her sister that had made Scarlett seem so dejected and vulnerable. Upon seeing her, he had wanted to take her in his arms and assure her everything would be all right. But of course he hadn't. He knew he acted like a cad. Focusing his attention on the letter in his hand, he read it.

_Your wife is raising a ruckus, Rhett, and some of the men do slip about the tidbits they hear their wives gossiping about. They tell me some of the respectable women scarcely know if she is still a sinner or a saint. She has been seen going to her weekly visits to the cemetery, picking up the children from school, and staying home. Just the other day I saw her at the store. She glared at me through the window; cold enough to melt ice, let me tell you…_

The sound of a clearing throat made Rhett shove the letter in his pocket. His eyes rose to the woman before him. She was wearing near to nothing save her ornate corset, her chemise and a fan playfully in her hand. A woman who knew very well how to please a man. Yet he was bored and his mind was on another woman, as it always was. The woman was none other then his wife. She had seemed so defenseless when he had returned; even then he could see her courage despite the look that she was unraveling. Still the first words that had come out of his mouth was that he was leaving right away.

Scarlett had looked paler then usual and a little thinner. He couldn't blame her. He knew very well she had been through hell since Melanie had died. She had been worn out with her campaign at getting him back. The damned stubbornness was that he had always admired about her. However she seemed to be giving up on winning him back with bitterness and resignation.

Should it have surprised him? He didn't know. Despite the fact she had held onto Ashley Wilkes all the time he had known her, for twelve long years she had held onto the illusion of the wooden headed Mr. Wilkes, she wasn't willing to wait that long to fight for him. Ironic.

"Mr. Butler," the woman said, pouting at his obvious lack of reaction. "What would you like me to do?"

His eyes roved over her. Dark hair framed a pale face and full lips puckered with paint. She looked clean and youthful, far from unattractive. Suddenly he realized her eyes were green. Green like emeralds, like Scarlett's eyes but darker since Scarlett's were pale.

Motioning for her to draw nearer to him, she had, his hands went around her waist and he drew her down so that she was straddling his legs. He began to kiss her throat with light, teasing kisses that made her let out a breathy sigh.

Eyes still closed, he could feel himself loosing his mind in his exploration of her. But her scent wasn't rose water and her skin was far too soft. Her hands didn't have ink stains on them and the nails weren't bitten down to a quick. Even her hair wasn't as soft as Scarlett's; it was coarse and elaborately curled, not natural. Shuddering, an image of his wife filled his mind…

_"I do declare you have a Madame in every town, Rhett Butler," Scarlett teased. "I'm not sure I should marry you."_

_He chuckled. "It's too late for that, Scarlett. You wouldn't want to break my poor heart would you?"_

_She pretended to think then burst out laughing. "But really, Rhett. Do you promise me once we're married, you'll quit consorting with… those women. I won't share you with anyone else."_

_For once a serious look came into his eyes. "Scarlett, look at me. I promise you'll never have to share me. As long as you're my wife, I won't seek comfort elsewhere."_

_A self-satisfied smile came over her lips as she toyed with her ring. "It is a deal, Rhett. I do believe we should shake hands."_

_A wolfish grin came to his face. "Oh, let's do more than that."_

_Then he kissed her. Slowly her arms wound around his neck as she surrendered to his kisses. The feel of her soft lips against his made him deepen the kiss considerably that was until his hands ran in her hair and he felt a rough hair piece. Pulling back, he stared down at her._

_"You're wearing fake curls."_

_"Oh, Rhett," she sighed, a moody look crossing her face. "It's all the fashion. Women wear curls now. Fiddle-dee-dee, you act as if I had committed a grievous offense or something."_

_"It's a shame to hide such beautiful hair," he murmured, taking it out of her hair._

_"Rhett!" she protested but was stopped as he pulled her so that she was flush against him, dropping the hairpiece on the floor, he stepped on it._

_"Promise me you'll never wear it," he demanded, his lips almost brushing hers. There was obvious longing in her eyes and a bit of frustration._

_"Very well," she muttered. "Now shut up and kiss me."_

_He chuckled and complied._

Jerking back to the present, Rhett placed a hand through his hair and quickly deposited the woman off of his lap. He got up and went to the window. Letting out a few breaths, he turned back to the confused Madame with a rueful smile.

"I'll pay you for your service," he explained. "I thought… hell, forget it. I'm sorry to have wasted your time."

"Did I do something wrong?" she calmly questioned. "Surely you don't find me unattractive."

"Oh you're attractive," he bitterly said, reaching into his pocket to pull out money. "But that's beside the point…"

A thoughtful look came to her eyes as she placed on her robe. "Last night you said a name in your sleep… I believe it was Scarlett."

He froze for an instant before an enigmatic grin came to his face. "I have made it a habit to call out my fantasy names…"

A frown came to her lips. "I know you're married." She pointed at his ring on his finger. "Scarlett is your wife, is she not?"

Rhett's eyes went to his finger. He hadn't been able to take off his ring. Leave and abandon his wife yes, yet he couldn't part with the golden band around his finger that Scarlett had placed there six years before. Maybe he was too sentimental and this stranger was seeing his weakness. This didn't sit well with him.

Curtly nodding, he said, "Yes, but that is none of your concern to interrogate your customers. Here is your money for last night and today."

Taking the offered money, she sighed but a slight smile came to her lips. "You must really love your wife… What is it, she won't please you in bed?"

"She pleases me quite well," he muttered, remembering the last time they had been together. The passion, desire and anger that had driven them both one of the most earth-shattering climaxes he could remember. "We're separated however, so the marriage bed doesn't hold any charm for me."

Her eyes were hesitant as if questioning if she should ask him the next thing on her mind. "You initiated the separation?"

Rolling his eyes, he quipped, "You know it isn't very becoming on a prostitute to interrogate her unwilling customers. If I had wanted to talk to you about my wife, I would have already. As it is, there isn't much to say about her..."

She pouted, lowering her eyes in what was meant to be a docile, submissive manner. A smile played at the corner of Rhett's mouth for he knew all the tricks in the book. This woman wasn't as coy as Scarlett but she was playing a good part.

"Before I leave," she said at last, "satisfy my curiosity on what she looks like and who she is. Then I shall leave and should you ask for me again, I won't mention your wife to you."

Shrugging, he thought a moment. What harm would it do? This was France and it wasn't as if he would likely see the woman again. Even though he very well could call for her another time, she knew no one that he knew. Motioning for her to sit beside him on the bed, she smiled and sat near him.

"She's a southern belle," he thoughtfully said. "From the first moment I saw her, she had both men and boys spell-bound by her beauty and charm. Then the war between the North and South broke out, she fought long and hard to survive, she became bitter after loving another woman's husband for twelve long years." There was bitterness in his voice.

"And you waited for her?" she asked, surprisingly perceptive.

Nodding, he continued, "Yes, like a fool I waited and finally talked her into marrying me. I promised her fun and a life full of money and little worries. But she still wanted him even when I held her and made love to her it was always him. So I got fed up. Finally, she realized she loved me but by then I was through with her. Now the man's wife is dead so I gave her permission to marry him…"

"Will she?" she asked, her green eyes shining with curiosity. Not an excited curiosity like Scarlett's when she heard gossip, this woman had no ulterior motive that he could detect, and her expression was kinder somehow.

"No," he confidently said with a sigh. "She's too stubborn and has tired of him. It's me she wants now."

"You sound tired of the thought," she observed. "Isn't it good to be loved and wanted? Forgive me, Monsieur Butler, but I would have given anything to have the love of someone instead of spreading my legs for every man who is wiling to pay me. You don't really want whores; you're just trying to drown your wife from your mind. I have seen it before"

A bitter twist came to his lips. "How apt that you would catch that. Au revoir, Claire. I shall see you soon…"

Shaking her head, she briefly touched his shoulder as she passed him. "No, Monsieur. I shall not see you for I do believe that you will go to your wife. I wish you much happiness. Au revoir, Monsieur Butler."

Then she slipped out of his motel room. For a moment Rhett stared at the closed door and sighed, rising to his feet. It was still relatively early. Perhaps he would go to the nearest saloon and get a drink. He needed it badly. Yet he was damned tired and sank back onto the bed, laying his body across the freshly made bed and placing his arms behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling.

Suddenly he knew he would contact his mother tomorrow to hear if she had heard from Scarlett. He knew they had been corresponding lately and it took all his willpower not to ask about his wife. He was sure she was raising hell in Atlanta that is if she had left Tara...

It had been two weeks ago. Two weeks since he had last seen or heard from her. Two long weeks of trying to drown her from his mind with whores, parties, gambling and the occasional public appearance. Paris was a lively place but it held little charm for him as it once had.

Yet he knew it was high time he returned to Charleston and investigated what Scarlett was up to. Claire had been right, he had tried unsuccessfully to drown Scarlett from his mind and now that his anger had cleared away he was ready to call a truce with her and hope they could reach some semblance of a life together.

He smiled. He knew she would gloat. But he missed her more then he had thought possible and he was wiling to overlook his lapse in judgment. He would proceed with caution and see where the road would take them.

TBC


	46. Better to hate than Love

Note: Well I decided to just go ahead and post this chapter without consulting my beta. Probably a poor choice but I was anxious to get this chapter over with and since it is nearly Christmas, I thought, why not? Thanks for the wonderful reviews and encouragement. Next chapter we will get a glimpse of Rhett in Atlanta for all the Rhett fans. So enjoy and please review.

**Part 46**

In Savannah for only two weeks, Scarlett was already butting heads with her grandfather. Glaring at him, he merely turned his thin lips into a defiant sneer from his bed. The sickly, sallow look in his face increasing. Had this man truly borne her mother? Their first meeting had been anything but pleasant…

_"Who the hell are you?" Pierre Robillard asked from his bed._

_"You're granddaughter," she said with mock sweetness, "Surely you remember me grandfather."_

_The eyes narrowed. "What are you doing here?"_

_"Oh, but you didn't receive my telegram?" Scarlett innocently asked, acting distressed and hoping it would work. "I was so sure that you would have heard of my arrival before hand."_

_"Hogwash," he muttered, slightly wheezing. "You want something from me. You aren't at all like Ellen… by the looks of you; you're guilty for something you did. I don't care what you are hiding but I always find out…"_

_"You haven't changed much," she observed, eyeing his thin face that had once been attractive in its day but now showed every line and sagging. The bones were visible on his face and the hardship of old age showing. "Still, no doubt rubbing it in my face that I am Irish and no pure of the proud French bloodline of the Robillards."_

_"Your mother was a true Robillard until I disowned her. People scarcely remember her anymore. For all her ogling at her cousin and the great aspirations she held." He sighed._

_Scarlett opened her mouth to reply but he lie back against his pillows and shot her a disdainful look, motioning with his hand that she was dismissed. "I can't match your energy and stubbornness. You can stay for now in my home as a distant guest but leave me a lone now so I can get some rest."_

_Knowing she had won, she smiled._

Now, a week later after her initial arrival, Scarlett was standing in his room with her arms folded. Having gone in public, she had caused a huge rise of notice in her. People naturally flocking to her and inquiring as to who she was. Not lying, she told them proudly that she was the former Ellen Robillard O'Hara's daughter from Atlanta and had come to visit her ailing grandfather. True she had made herself seem like a saint, but one little lie couldn't hurt anyone.

Scarlett had gotten accustomed to seeming like the ideal lady of Atlanta. They had seen her as a heroine in Charleston and as far as she was concerned, she would uphold her mother's unblemished name and be seen as a distinguished lady. But Pierre had not taken to the idea that she announced she was related to him.

"I already told you, I don't want you in here," he continued, his voice nasally. "Didn't your mother teach you to obey your elders?"

Her brow arched as she crossed her arms. "She did but I did not listen. I shan't listen to a stubborn old fool. If you want to kill yourself, that is fine with me but just think of all the money you'd be loosing..."

Scarlett knew that approach worked for her. And if there was one thing she had learned about Pierre Robillard in the week she had been in Savannah, was he loved money almost as much as her. She was certain he had millions hoarded away somewhere. As it was, a gleam came to his eyes.

"You're hoping it will go to you," he said. "But I would never give you my money. Is that why you are here or are you trying to cloak your sins like your mother?"

Scarlett stiffened and coldly said, "Don't you dare talk about my mother. She was a lady and far more generous then you, you low down…."

He held up a thin hand with a cough. "Yes, yes I know, young lady. If you would cease insulting me, I would explain what my youngest daughter did to bring shame to the Robillard name…"

As she watched him, Scarlett despised him. He had been bearable with his moods and his lack of grandfatherly love when she had arrived. Indeed at first he had refused to see her and had tried to send her away. But not being easily deterred, she had pushed open the door from the stuttering maid and had marched right up to his room, demanding to be seen.

Now, on top of all to be borne and his lack of generosity, he was sullying her mother's name. Ellen who would have never hurt a fly, who had been self-sacrificing and the most beautiful woman she had ever known was being lowered by her own grandfather, it was unthinkable.

"Yes, I know," she snapped. "She married an Irishman and that is the one thing you can't forgive her of. Which is why you are an hateful old man and to have refused your granddaughter…"

He cackled. "That's not why you're mad. You are as clear to read as Ellen was. And no, not because she married that Irishman but because-"

They were interrupted by a knock at the door. Scarlett ordered for the person to enter and the maid did, looking slightly nervous. Rolling her eyes, Scarlett demanded, "Well what is it?" before her grandfather had the chance to.

A grudging admiration shun in his eyes for Scarlett's bluntness.

"Speak up, Besty."

"Well, sir, there is a letter here for Miss Scarlett…"

"Give it to me," he ordered before Sacrlett could put in a word edgewise.

"That is my letter!" she cried. "You have no right to read it… who is it from anyway, Betsy?"

"I dunno how to read ma'am," she plainly said, her eyes darting between the two people with equally strong wills. Debating on whom she would listen to, for she served Scarlett but Pierre was the one who owned the house.

Easily, Scarlett yanked the letter from the maid's hands and glanced at the front. It read: Rhett Butler in bold scroll and her heart leapt with anticipation and foreboding, wondering what he had to say. As she could see, Henry Hamilton had forwarded the letter to her.

"Who is it?" he demanded, with narrowed eyes.

"My husband," she replied with a sniff. "If that is any of your business. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to my room to read this. And this evening I won't be back for supper."

"You will be back for supper," he demanded. "As if I would bear the company of that count alone. He bores me to death and if there is one thing I can give you, Scarlett is that you don't bore me."

Whenever he said her name it always sounded gritted out disdainfully. Having made it clear on numerous occasions he detested her name. "It is not a good, solid name," he had said. Another thing he disliked about her. Yet, Scarlett knew deep down he enjoyed her company so she smiled.

"We'll see how I'm feeling," she brightly said. "I have been under the weather lately…"

It was really the baby that had been affecting her moods. Some days she was as happy as ever and other days she was moody. The changes in her moods were drastic and how her body felt. Some days she was weak and tired while it shifted to bursts of energy. Where she felt like she could dance all night at many of the countless parties she had went to without her grandfather's knowledge.

Without realizing what she was doing, she leaned over and gave her grandfather a kiss on his cheek as she had done many a times to Gerald. Surprised eyes met hers and she was equally surprised, having done it unconsciously. Smoothing her dress, as if she had never kissed the old, mean man, she kept a straight face, wanting to leave as soon as possible but knowing he would try to detain her with snide comments. Her hands were itching to read the letter from Rhett, grasped in her shaky hand.

"You may go," he finally sighed.

Turning on her heel, she nearly dashed out of the room but forced herself to go slowly. Knowing she mustn't seem too eager for he would laugh at her but also knowing he would only think her ill-mannered and call her an Irish peasant as he seemed to take great joy from. How she hated him sometimes! Wondering how her mother could put up with such a man, she knew now that Ellen must have been born a saint.

Reaching the sanctity of the guest room, she ripped open the letter frantically. Her eyes scanning the bold writing:

_**Scarlett,**_

_**Perhaps you have made it a habit of disregarding others, namely not telling your husband of your whereabouts. I made it a point to visit Atlanta only to find you gone and the children at Pittypat Hamilton's, quite happy but missing you, only God knows why.**_

_**I don't know what game you're playing but the divorce will go through within a month's time and I will deposit the money as agreed. Surely even you can't contend against our agreement. For the time being I will remain in Atlanta with the children at our old home until you wire me to tell me of your upcoming arrival. In which I will return to Charleston on business.**_

_**RKB**_

Feeling the breath leave her lips, she bit it to keep the tears in. She had thought perhaps with time Rhett would come to realize he had missed her. Remembering that quaint old saying that absence made the heart grow fonder. So many hopes and dreams had been shattered for her and she bitterly knew that Rhett wouldn't give in.

He wasn't like Charles or any other country beaux. No, Rhett was as stubborn as her and nothing could bring him to her heel. If she was sick and dying, she knew he wouldn't care. She hated him as much as she had loved him, since it was better to hate than love him. Ashley had said something of the sort once, something a philosopher had said for love made people blind.

She could never see Rhett as just another person in the world. He was either her husband, lover and friend or her enemy… Knowing that she would either be madly in love with him or hate and despise him, she chose hate. Conjuring up the old wounds and hurts he had inflicted on her recently, she crumpled the letter. No, she wouldn't let him know how hurt she was or that she was carrying his baby.

Hand going to her stomach, as was her usual habit when alone, she wearily walked over to her bed and sank on the mattress, covering her face in the pillow, eyes roving across the room. It was mid-February, she was nearly two months along and it would be awhile until she showed; yet the baby was ever real to her.

Now, she was too tired to go outside and pretend everything was all right. She would take supper in the room and feign an illness. Realizing the letter was still grasped in her hand, she roughly threw it across the room. She couldn't bear to look at the reminder of Rhett's disinterest. Some part of her wanted to rush back to Atlanta for Rhett was home. But the other part didn't care anymore. For one more week she would stay in Savannah then after that she would return to face the old cats and tell the children she was pregnant.

TBC

Next Chapter: In Atlanta Rhett wonders where Scarlett is. In Savannah, Scarlett makes a new friend.


	47. Rhett in Atlanta, Scarlett in Savannah

Note: Thanks for all the reviews! Here is the next part with some on Rhett's thoughts. Next chapter Rhett will find out about Scarlett's pregnancy so bear with me. Hope you all enjoy.

Part 47

Striding through the hall of the monstrosity Rhett had built, he found himself in front of Scarlett's vacant room. The children were at school and he had just returned from dropping them off. Now, with very little to do, he had found himself pacing the halls and hating the silence. When Bonnie had been alive it had been filled with laughter and the patter of her feet.

Now with the children at school and Scarlett gone, it was oddly quiet. Funny the stark difference that only two people could make. Refusing to go in the nursery had brought him to his wife's room, the one she had barred him from years before. At his side, his hands slightly clenched and he questioned why he was going to enter, but he knew why…

Opening the door, he walked into the dim room. Through the curtains, light shun in but not nearly enough. He had to squint to see any of the surroundings at first. The usually immaculate room showed neglect that the covers were in disarray on the bed and there was a slight dust when he ran his hand over the surface of her vanity table.

Memories assailed him in this room, of Scarlett and him. The early days of their marriage when he had hope. Really he had believed they had a good chance. Sacrlett had been so happy and he thought he had been so close to making her love him. The first year he had been hopeful, even when she had kicked him out of their room. Thinking Bonnie was a testament that she could learn to love him.

By the fourth year of their marriage, he had given up hope. Oh, it occasionally lingered but it hadn't been a pressing thought to make her love him. It had been all about loving Bonnie and the children. Of working at the bank and paving a way for his daughter in society. Now, it was too late for Bonnie and for Scarlett and him…

Yet, he had been hopeful in France. Maybe they weren't a lost cause, which is why he had returned. Still searching for something only Scarlett could give him. Still, the wall was up however and he had to be cautious with Scarlett. It's not like he had never leapt into something without protection or much thought. Which was why he was testing the waters and seeing how being back in his old home and Atlanta was like.

The letter he had written to Scarlett had been brief and abrupt. No doubt the letter would make her angry… But he had been as mad as hell at coming back to his home and finding she had vanished. Only Henry Hamilton knew of her whereabouts and wouldn't tell him a thing. Not knowing where Scarlett was at was unsettling for he had always found her and knew where she was. During the war he had kept tabs on her, always knowing where Scarlett O'Hara was in the world and how close he was to her.

Usually brief inquiries would reveal where she was. Ironic that was before she had been his wife and now that she was, he still had very little control over where she was. They didn't know a thing at Tara and Mammy had said very little, having resorted to anger towards him. She had told him that she wouldn't speak with him until he wrote a letter of apology to Scarlett. It had been tempting but something still held him back from being vulnerable to Scarlett.

No reply had come yet and he didn't expect one. He would simply wait for a few weeks or so and if he didn't hear word from her, Rhett would search for her. He knew she couldn't have went far and wasn't blind to the fact that Scarlett was quiet ignorant when it came to traveling far out of the country, even in New Orleans she had shown her young naiveté which had endeared her to himself.

Feeling suddenly suffocated in the room, he let his eyes wander around one last time, resting on the bed and vanity. Remembering memories he would care to forget, he turned on his heel and left. What he needed was some air and a good, solid drink before it was time to pick up the children.

XXX

Finding himself in front of Belle's wasn't surprising in the least for the townspeople or for Rhett. It had only been a few weeks since he had last visited and before October, he had been a frequent visitor to the establishment, especially after Bonnie had died.

It was a surprise on how people received the fact that Rhett Butler consorted with Belle Watling. There were those that blamed Scarlett, saying she wasn't the most dutiful or loving wife, they didn't blame him for going to Belle's. Then there were the others who grieved badly for him over the loss of his daughter eight months before and didn't blame him that he would seek comfort elsewhere.

Today he had walked instead of ordering the carriage to be drawn, which would have taken a lot more time. So on his way down Peachtree Street he had run into Mrs. Merriweather much to his dismay. But with a smile pasted on his face, he greeted her most cordially.

"Good morning, Mrs. Merriweather."

"Ah, Captain Butler," she warmly greeted. "I had heard that you returned and am so glad you did. Where is Scarlett?"

"Oh you know Scarlett, Mrs. Merriweather," Rhett quipped. "Since she gave up the mills, she is restless and in need of fresh air. She went for a small trip to visit some distant relatives."

Mrs. Merriweather frowned. "But she just returned from Charleston not even two months ago. Indeed, we all miss having her at the sewing circles and we needed her at the upcoming bazaar. She truly has been most kind, lending store credit and going to all the lectures about remembering the cause."

Rhett's eyebrows rose and he nearly laughed. Scarlett sewing and going to lectures? He couldn't imagine it. And even more unbelievable was her lending credit. She hated loaning money but hoarded it. Mrs. Merriweather looked deadly serious and his unbelief was replaced with surprise.

"I'm sure Scarlett will return as soon as possible," he assured her distractedly, wishing to make his escape from idle chatter and go to Belle's. But that wasn't to be as she launched into shaky territory.

"Captain Butler, I know Scarlett and you have been through a lot. Believe me I have been through my fair share. Your poor little girl dying was a tragedy. I loved that girl as if she were my own granddaughter. Yet I say with the utmost thought that I hope that everything goes well for Scarlett and you. In the beginning I was against your marriage, but now I wouldn't wish any ill fortune on you two. Melanie accepted both of you and so do I."

Sometimes Rhett wondered if he was numb. At the mention of Bonnie's name, he no longer felt anything. Almost as if the horrifying event had never happened, as if his mind was separated from reality. As for her acceptance of Sacrlett and him, he didn't take the words to heart since truthfully he had no idea what Scarlett and his relationship would be from now on. But he nodded.

"Thank you, Mrs. Merriweather. I will be sure to tell Scarlett."

As if appeased, she walked past him. Rhett quickly made his way down the street and turned onto the main street that would lead him to Belle's. People nodded at him with a few occasional greetings but none seemed to find it a pressing need to stop him, for that he was glad.

He disliked Atlanta, he always had. Since it was a relatively new city, it didn't possess the charm that he associated now with Charleston or some of the older places. It had no beauty or charm that would have attracted him moving here. It had been only for Scarlett and the children. Indeed he had told Scarlett that Atlanta was too raw and too new for the likes of him.

So after his conversation with Mrs. Merriweather, Rhett was pulling out his key and went to the side door in order to enter through his room, well the place he stayed when Scarlett and him had fought or he had been too angry over her mooning over Ashley. In some ways it was his haven and had been for years, only lately more frequent.

Belle's room was located a door down from his but she rarely was in there. She liked going to the parlor to visit with the girls and gossip. So it wasn't surprising at that hour that he found her in the parlor, sitting down with the girls around her. Their laughter and chattering filled the air but all paused upon seeing him, a few blushes and smiles coming to their faces as they wordlessly left.

In turn Belle had a soft smile on her face and her eyes shun as she looked at him. Rhett noticed she was wearing a becoming dress the emphasized her full bosom and though he wasn't insanely attracted to her as he was to Scarlett, he could still admire her beauty and her good heart.

"So the prodigal returns," she joked lightly, coming to her feet and holding out her hands.

"Yes, I thought it was high time I returned. I know it's only been a few weeks and really I could have stayed longer but…"

She tweaked his chin. "I know, Rhett, you couldn't stay away. I heard your wife has gone though and flew the birds coop. I tried to keep my eye on her and occasionally sent a girl of mine to her store but...."

A slight smile came to his lips as he sat down on the plush red settee she had just been sitting on. Pulling out a cigar, he struck the match on his shoe and began to puff slowly, his eyes going to Belle as she shuffled around the room, her hands occasionally moving over the surface of her table and wall.

"I haven't the slightest idea where Scarlett is at," Rhett admitted with a sigh. "She simply left but it doesn't really surprise me. She always did what she wanted."

Belle shook her head with a husky laugh. "Oh, Rhett. You knew how she was like before ya married her."

He laughed shortly. "I did and I still married her. I don't know what I expected from her, Belle, and our marriage…"

"Love," she bluntly said. "Some part of you still wants her to love you for yourself, not for your money, Rhett."

"You know me too well," he praised. Getting onto his feet, he walked over to her and leaning down gently kissed her on her powdered cheek. "You're a good woman Belle and always know how to talk sense to me. I'm going back home."

Sadness momentary filled her eyes and wistfulness. "To wait for her? I never knew you to wait."

"I waited six years to marry her and another six for her to admit she was in love with me," he laughed. "I'm sure I can wait another week before I go searching for her."

"Miz Butler is fortunate, Rhett, though she might not know it," Belle told him. "You're a good man."

"I'm not too sure about how fortunate Scarlett is having a cad of a husband. But I'll take your word for it… Good-bye Belle."

"But before you go honey, there has been talk about Miz Butler. If I were you, I'd find out what she's trying to hide. Good-bye Rhett."

XXX

Enclosed in her partner's arms, Scarlett spun around, letting out a few steadying breaths, but smiling up at the handsome man who was her partner. He was definitely French and his accent bespoke this. When the dance had finished, he bowed over her hand and led her to the side, where he left to get her punch.

She hadn't realized her grandfather was near her until she heard the thump of his cane and his laugh, which weren't really a laugh but more of a snort. She held back the desire to shoot him a glare and move away.

"Enjoy the dance?"

"Indeed," she coolly said with a smile, not sparing him a glance. "I did very much grandfather." There was a pronounced sweetness in the word grandfather. But he wasn't deterred and moved a step closer to her, his brows furrowed.

"You are rather flushed for such a short dance and look tired," he observed speculatively. "It's not like a healthy woman to be tired unless…"

With a toss of her head, she shot back, "I don't care about your theories. I'm going to dance and dance all night without you bothering me..."

Shooting out one of her famous smiles, was enough to have the men line up for her and she sighed with relief as one man pulled her onto the dance floor, away from Pierre. The man, despite being old and misanthropic, was no fool. It was only a matter of time before he caught on and when he did, she knew he would either gloat or throw her out. Perhaps even call her a whore, in which she wasn't, for the child she was carrying was Rhett's. It had always been Rhett's and she would never bear any other man's child.

But she was running out of time. It was all ready the end of February and she hadn't moved forward any more then she had months ago. The aspirations of getting Rhett back weren't coming to pass and the child she was carrying wouldn't be wanted, at least not by Rhett. He would blame her and think she was using this only to get him back. Despite what he might think, she didn't want him to stay with her only because of the baby.

True she would be able to win him then and prove she loved him and the baby. She would be able to prove she had changed and give him happiness, she knew she could, but knew also that Rhett was damned stubborn and would fight her every advance. So she forced painful thoughts of him out of her mind and continued to dance, loving the distracting and invigorating feel of moving her body to the music. Glad that she could still dance lightly on her feet, as she had been able to do twelve years before, perhaps even better so.

Imagining what it would be like if this man was Rhett, she felt sickened. Really, she had to quit thinking about him for it was making her crazy and only consumed her thoughts. Everything was Rhett in her mind and she no doubt would have been talking about him, had she anyone to confide in…

As she was dancing, her partner suddenly stopped so that she stumbled and stepped on his foot. Looking up at him questioningly, her eyes followed his to the entrance. Everyone's eyes were at the door and a lone woman stood there, wearing a violet dress and her blonde hair pinned high atop her head. The pale face was composed but her painted lips turned into a smile as she continued forward.

A look of disgust came to the man's face in who was Scarlett's partner. Bringing his attention back to Scarlett, he said, "If you will excuse me…"

"Wait," Scarlett ordered, following after him. "Who is she?" She asked so in a whisper as she looked at the woman who didn't have anyone consorting with her but people seemed to stay far from her, well except for the men that is. A few went shamelessly towards her and other younger men seemed fascinated by her.

"The black widow," he muttered. "She has had many husbands, including my brother and seems to enjoy getting her clutches on many men. Poor brutes…"

Then he was gone and Scarlett turned her eyes to the direction of the woman. A man was leading her to the dance floor and she felt a stab of envy. Men seemed to be held captive by her and there was something in the woman's face that Scarlett couldn't name. Something she didn't possess, perhaps mysteriousness but it riled Scarlett to act and turn on her charm full force in the men who seemed to be avoiding the woman.

Thus it was a battle of wills between the two women. Scarlett knew the woman was looking her way and danced the best she could as if she were performing, sort of like when she had danced at St. Cecilia's Ball. But she was out of breath soon and feeling slightly dizzy, plus her feet hurt from the awful partners she had that incessantly stepped on her feet.

Feeling sick, Scarlett excused herself and slowly strolled towards the doors that would lead to the terrace. She needed fresh air and her corset, though lightly done, was constricting her airflow. The fresh air, once going outside was soothing and she deeply breathed in the air, looking out. For a moment nostalgia came over her and she thought of Charleston, not having loved the city because it was exciting, for it hadn't been but because she had been loved and accepted there.

Thinking she was alone, she relaxed briefly and placed her hands, folded across the railing. But a slight clearing of a throat, turning her head, interrupted her solitude; to Scarlett's surprise her eyes met the sight of the woman in whom had been called the black widow. The women didn't seem angry, only confident as she strolled forward, fan in hand.

"So you're Scarlett Butler," she said, her voice slightly husky. A deep accented voice that no doubt made Scarlett feel more envy at the sultry bur.

"Yes," she stiffly said as the woman came to stand beside her.

"You've been shooting daggers at me ever since I arrived… I bet with a woman of your beauty, you are accustomed to all the men being flocked around you." She laughed lightly.

Scarlett couldn't help but smile back at her own absurdity. It was laughable that even being twenty-eight years old, she still acted as a girl who craved all attention. Some thing never changed, and she would never change at wanting to be first to receive all the attention or wanting to be first.

"I'm Kitty Sloange," the woman was saying. "As you can tell, I'm not well received…"

Curiously staring at her, Scarlett grudgingly had to admit she was curious. Really she should flee from the woman's presence lest her own reputation be tarnished in Savannah, but she could not bring herself to leave. "Why is that?"

"I married for money," she admitted. "None of my husbands cared for me, only what was between my legs and the status I gave them."

Scarlett blushed at such bluntness. Kitty curiously stared at her. "Does that shock you?"

"No," she quickly lied. "But surely one of your husbands loved you…"

"No, not one of them. But then again I didn't care about any of them anyway."

For a moment Scarlett was silent until words so long held back, emerged from her lips, "My husband doesn't care about me either. He could care less where I went or what I did."

For some strange reason she felt liberated at sharing this. Before the words would have hurt her, but now it was better telling the truth. Perhaps Rhett had been right when he said the truth was always better, he had been hypocritical however since he had lied to her the whole time.

"Then he's a fool," Kitty dryly said. "Men are fools though, the whole lot of them."

Scarlett had always thought men were wiser then having vanity and prattling about clothes and beaux's. Men had always seemed more logical to her and seemed to have a whole lot more fun. Yet now she thought the majority of men were fools. As she looked at Kitty Sloange, she sensed a kinship with her. Both cut off form society simply because of being outcasts and for their husbands' actions.

"My first husband," Kitty began with a smile, "was married."

Thus began Kitty's tale to Scarlett and she was enraptured long into the night.

XXX

Much later, Scarlett was in her room, having just changed into her nightgown and feeling quite happy. She giggled at the thought of the shocking things Kitty Sloange had told her. Somehow, she felt much better about being in Savannah. Actually, looked forward for tomorrow because Kitty had invited her out for lunch.

Yet her calm feeling didn't last as her stomach suddenly lurched and she stumbled to the lavatory, retching any substance left of her supper and punch. Her body trembled and she wiped at her sweaty brow, hating the bad taste it left in her mouth. For moment she stayed on her knees until the sickness subsided.

As she rose up, she heard the sound of a cane thumping against the ground pass down the hallway before a door quietly shut.

TBC

Next chapter: Rhett makes a surprise visit.


	48. Living A Lie

Note: All the reviews were greatly appreciated. Wow, it's been a long time since I added a new chapter. So here it is and please enjoy.

**Part 48: Living A Lie**

Perhaps it was all the excitement Scarlett was experiencing being a friend to Kitty Sloange or just the fact she was nervous to see Rhett, but she held off buying tickets to go back to Atlanta. For once, she felt happy being away from responsibility and simply having fun running through Savannah. Having Kitty tell and show her things she would have never thought of.

As long as her mind was busy, she didn't think of Rhett that much. Luckily Kitty didn't ask her about him and for once Scarlett was actually glad not to talk about herself. She hadn't told Kitty much about herself. And was just fine not being in the center of attention for once.

Kitty was a pleasant distraction to keep her mind off of Rhett. It was strange having a companion that was a woman beside Melanie or her mother. Not having many friends, it was still new to her to be able to just relax and do the usual things friends did: laugh, gossip and talk. She didn't have to worry about shocking Kitty, it was often reversed and she was shocked by the wicked things Kitty had done.

Currently, they had spent all day shopping and were sitting at a quaint restaurant. It wasn't what she was accustomed to since she was used to dining at the best places, but found it quite relaxing and refreshing in not being around others who held their noses in the air, thinking they had more money than her.

"Scarlett," Kitty began, after a brief moment in the pause of their conversation. "I've noticed you've hardly touched your meals…" she lowered her voice and leaned forward. "I have to know…are you pregnant?"

The question so threw Scarlett off guard she blanched and quickly looked around, lest someone heard the question.

"Shh!" she hissed. "Do you want someone to hear?"

"Are you?" she asked, her brown eyes unflinching.

"Is that any of your business?" she asked, preparing to get up. Hating that Kitty could tell and was forcing her to tell something she still wanted to keep a secret.

She sighed. "No, but you can tell me. I have children of my own so I am not blind to the symptoms."

Scarlett's brows rose. "You haven't mentioned children ever since we met."

"It's something I don't like talking about. I have a little boy and girl. Their father took them from me and called me an unfit mother. It's a man's world and a woman doesn't have a say over her children."

Remembering how Rhett had once threatened to take Bonnie from her, she felt sick. He could very well do so with their unborn child, but she knew she wouldn't let him. She couldn't step around the issue so she wordlessly nodded.

"Yes," was all she said and both fell silent as Kitty nodded.

"I figured as much… Does your husband know? Ah, he doesn't."

"No, and he shan't. He wants nothing to do with me so why should he have any say about our child? No doubt he doesn't want the baby either. I despise him, Kitty and I shall until…"

"No, you don't," Kitty cut in. "You love him, that's why you're so upset. Only the ones you love make you the most insane… Scarlett, you should tell him, he has a right to know and maybe he has changed."

She snorted. "Rhett Butler change? No, he shall always be the same scoundrel and unfeeling man that I met. He doesn't want to change and for all of my apologies and declarations, he has scorned."

"Still," Kitty interjected. "Men are strange creatures, they say one thing and mean another. He might scorn it, but it's scaring him to death, mark my words."

"Oh, Fiddle-dee-dee, Kitty," Scarlett dryly said. "You don't know Rhett like I do. Nothing scares him." A sad smile came to her lips as she took a bite of pastry and pushed the untouched wine cup away.

XXX

It was a little past noon when the carriage pulled up to Pierre Robilllard's home. Kitty remained in the carriage as Scarlett got out with a smile on her face at the upcoming ball tonight and the promise of another shopping excursion with Kitty in the morning.

Kitty had her arms resting on the door as she leaned forward and gave Scarlett a grin.

"See you tonight," she said and her voice dropped to a whisper. "And take care of yourself."

Rolling her eyes at Kitty's "subtlety" or lack of it, she turned, calling over her shoulder, "I can take care of myself."

Watching as Kitty drove off, Scarlett smiled to herself and turned back towards the house, her smile dimming briefly as she looked at the steps, door and windows which were always closed with drapes. It was an expensive house, but it made Scarlett think of a prison like her aunt's house in Charleston.

Humming a tune, she went up the steps, pulling her hem up with one hand as she continued to hum. Opening the door with her key, she walked into the silent house and shut the door behind her. Her intent was going up to her room to change and retreat to the library, hoping to avoid her grandfather's beckoning. When she heard a male clear their throat, she jumped, her eyes flying to the source.

In front of the window, to her disbelief stood Rhett. His long frame was resting against the wall as if he had been there awhile and had been looking out the window, watching her. She couldn't make out his expression since he was cloaked in the shadows, but as he moved into the light, she felt her heart lurch in elation even as she felt like a trapped rabbit.

"H-how did you know I was here?" she asked, her voice sounding strange even to her own ears, constricted.

"I have my ways," he said evasively. His very voice seemed to affect her for she shivered. But playing as if she didn't care, she turned.

"What is it that you want?"

Instead, he grabbed her wrist and pulled her with him. She struggled in vain as she glared up at him.

"Where is somewhere we can speak privately?" he asked with raised brows.

Opening her mouth to refuse, she thought better and closed it. Motioning for him to follow her, they walked down the hall. She could feel his eyes scrutinizing every inch of her from behind and felt rattled, lest she saw too much emotion or give herself away. As it was, her mind was spinning and her heart was crying out, "He's here, he's here." But she knew it wasn't for her sake, he knew something and that unsettled her. Did he know about the baby?

Once they had entered the parlor and he shut the door behind them, she felt even more claustrophobic. His very presence took up the room and it had been so long since she had truly been alone with him. Swallowing nervously, she watched as he advanced closer.

"How long did you think you could hide it before I found out?" he questioned, his eyes burning with anger as he walked forward, his white suit immaculate as ever and even in his anger, his very nearness thrilled her. But she wouldn't budge and hoped against hope he didn't mean he knew about the baby.

"I have no idea what you mean," she lied.

He laughed, if one could call it that. "You're lying, Scarlett. I know you're pregnant and have been for some time if I remember correctly. You're about two months along with my child… I just want to know when you planned on telling me that I am going to be a father again."

So he did know. She wondered how he had found out, but it didn't really surprise her. Rhett always found out everything and she couldn't speak past the lump in her throat. The anger, shame and humiliation she felt were all too real. So she held her peace and shrugged.

"Why should it matter to you?" she bitterly asked. "You don't give a damn what happens to me or what I do. Just so long as I didn't bother you again and hang around you like a lovesick fool. Well you got your wish, Rhett."

"I care when it's my child in question," he shot back. "Good God, Scarlett, were you going to wait to notify me when you went into labor or are you having revenge on me in that twisted, petty mind of yours?"

It took all her will not to scream at him. Taking deep breaths, she mustered her dignity and sniffed. "If you are done insulting me, tell me why you came then get out! I'm not returning with a man who scorns and abandoned me."

His brows rose. "Abandoned you, that's a laugh. You're the one who abandoned your children and disappeared without a word."

Hands shaking, she clenched her fingers. "Don't you dare drag my children into this! I had to get away and if you must know, Rhett Butler. You're the one who abandoned them. I stayed with them these past few months that you have been with your whores in France! Don't think that I don't know where you have been. You didn't even have the decency to visit the children when you were in town but ran off to that creature's place, of all people. Forget that I said I loved you, because I couldn't love a man as unfeeling as you. I hate you so much that I-"

Trailing off, she felt the room swim before her eyes. For a horrifying moment she thought she would black out and swayed on her feet but Rhett, who was as quick as a panther, caught her in his arms and she fell unwillingly against his chest, feeling as weak as a newborn colt and hating her weakness. But when she looked up, she saw worry creasing his brows and his dark eyes rang with concern; she felt brief satisfaction in that.

"Scarlett, are you alright?"

Nodding, she muttered, "I'm fine. I felt just like this when I… I was pregnant with Bonnie."

His eyes darkened briefly. "I remember… Here sit down."

She let him lead her to the settee where she sat down. Of course he didn't sit beside her but observed her from a few feet away, his hands shoved in his pockets. Hating the silence, she shot him a pointed look.

"I'm still not going with you, Rhett."

"You're my wife," he reminded her. "And carrying my child."

"You're wife," she laughed. "That's fine coming from a man who claimed he wanted a divorce. And it's my child too… It was Henry Hamilton that opened his mouth wasn't it? Oh, I could murder him…"

She was cut off mid-sentence when the door opened with a bang and Pierre came in, clutching his cane. His eyes roved between Scarlett and Rhett; finally a satisfied grin flitted on his face.

"I take it you received my letter," he announced to Rhett. "And have come to take my unruly granddaughter out of my hair."

Scarlett's mouth floundered in outrage. "You told him that I-oh! How dare you stick your nose in others affairs! I should have known that you…"

"I always believed in a husband having a firm rein over his wife," Pierre muttered. "And I can tell when a woman is pregnant, granddaughter. I may be senile but not blind. Your place is with your husband. I never saw Ellen come back and complain about her lot with that Irishman."

Her jaw clenched. "Pa wasn't a cad, he loved mother. You don't know a thing about my marriage so don't you dare presume-"

"I presume a lot," he interjected, his eyes piercing hers. "Young lady, you might be flighty and snub me with your Irish blood but you also have French blood of Robillard running through your veins. Now, I will leave you to the mercy of your husband and don't expect to be in my will."

"I'd rather die!" she childishly shot back to his retreating figure.

The only thing that sounded was a gruff laugh from his as he shut the door, leaving her alone with Rhett again. There was amusement lurking in his eyes and finally he threw back his head and laughed. She stared at him as if he were mad.

"Why, I thought you were mad and now… you're laughing."

"It's not a crime to laugh Scarlett. That or wring your neck, as it is, I have mind to spank you until your black and blue but under the circumstances…How long have you known?"

"Weeks," she shortly said. "Call me fanciful but I don't want you to stay because of the… baby. I couldn't bear to go through what we did before. You hating me and not caring. I shan't go through a loveless marriage again. I'm no fool to believe you want to start anew."

There was a sudden seriousness in his expression. "And if I said I wanted to start over?"

"I wouldn't believe you. You never take back what you say nor are you sorry for it."

"I see," he muttered, his eyes meeting hers with a cautious expression. "Perhaps you're right, Scarlett. But regardless of my feelings for you, we're going to have another child and we shall stay together for the child's sake."

"No."

He frowned. "Can you imagine growing up without your father and mother together, Scarlett? You were damn fortunate to have two parents that were together. It messes up a child without both parents and I won't do that to a child of mine."

The expression she shot him could have melted ice. "I won't live a lie."

He laughed. "Now you want to be honest. You've been living a lie, Scarlett since before the war started and ended. We're staying married and you're having that baby. No objections, I hope."

Looking offended, she glared at him. "I won't object to having the baby, not that there is anything I could do about it… Oh, don't look at me like that… I know what I said about… Bonnie but I would never kill my own child. Mock me all you want, Rhett but I want this baby."

He stared at her for a long time before he looked away. "Maybe a leopard does change their spots."

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

Looking troubled, she fiddled with the hem of her sleeve before looking up at him with an adamant expression, one full of fire. "But mark my words Rhett, I won't share your bed until you tell me that you love me."

"Then your bed is going to be very cold...Come on, Mrs. Butler, I'll help you pack. Heaven knows you no doubt brought the whole house with you."

There was so much left unsaid and she opened her mouth but closed it. Maybe it was enough that Rhett was returning to her and she would have to hold her tongue for now. But she knew she couldn't remain silent forever and there would be a reckoning between them.

TBC


	49. Stripped Of All Defenses

Note: Thank you to my wonderful seven reviewers. I know the end may seem a little repetitive and not that exciting, but I promise within a few chapters more action will happen between Scarlett and Rhett so be patient. Enjoy and reviews are always loved!

Part 49: Stripped Of All Defenses

Watching her husband under her lashes, Scarlett was resting against the plush seat of the interior of the carriage. Edging away from Pierre Robillard's house one hour later, with her bags securely fastened and a shawl over her shoulders, the carriage passed through crowded traffic. Rhett had done most of the packing and had made her put on a green dress as compared to her black one she had been wearing.

He of course, had been all business, but through the hour they were in her room, she could sense him watching her. Now, he was very silent beside her, their bodies at a proper distance, though she itched to touch him. But keeping herself in check, she tried to not stare at him too much and settled for staring out the window at the passing scenery in silence.

"Rhett," she finally said, giving him a piercing stare. "I need to see someone before we leave."

His brow quirked, but he agreed. Receiving the address from her, he gave it to the driver. Soon, they would be at Kitty's. It's not as if she could leave without telling Kitty that she was. Feeling slightly sad, that she was loosing another person in her life, she was silent until they turned on the street where Kitty and her husband lived, he was rarely home however so Scarlett didn't have to worry about that.

As the driver stopped, Rhett looked over at her as she reached over to open the door. "I'll be back," was all she said and when he nodded she opened the door and stepped out onto the sidewalk.

Standing in front of Kitty's house, she felt some trepidation. Looking back at the carriage, she saw Rhett watching her with a curious expression, almost irritated or goading. So, she placed her mind back to the present and forced herself to go to the stairs that led to the porch. She wouldn't show fear, though she had never called Kitty. It was always Kitty that called upon her.

Grabbing the brass knocker, she gave one strong knock. Hearing shuffling within the walls, the door opened not a moment later, revealing a maid.

"I'm here to see Mrs. Slaonge," she said without a pause.

Nodding, as if it were no surprise the maid ushered her in. Inside the house, Scarlett took a breath as the door shut behind her. The interior of the house was much like the Atlanta one. With little warmth, not like all other older homes or the house on the Battery in Charleston she had come to love so much. Indeed Kitty's home wasn't as dark as hers since it had mint green and a black interior.

The portieres were green with a few black vases over mahogany furniture and there was winding staircase with polished wood for the railing. As she drank in the sight of the house, she jumped at hearing Kitty's voice.

"Scarlett, what on earth are you doing here?"

"He's here," was all she said, both falling silent for they knew of whom, she spoke. Kitty's eyes were questioning as she went over to the window and looked out, Scarlett followed her.

"When?" Kitty asked.

"As soon as I arrived. He knows about the baby Kitty and said he says- he won't divorce me… I have no say in the matter. Oh, I hate him! I wish it was anyone but him that I loved."

"But you do," Kitty gently said. "Return with him, Scarlett. Hush, let me speak... And within a few months I'll come and visit you in Atlanta. I'll help you win him back, there are ways woman have power more so than men."

Her face brightened. "Oh, Kitty will you really come?"

She rolled her eyes. "Of course, I said I would, didn't I? Now go."

Nodding was all Scarlett could do as she despondently made her way to the door and opened it without looking back. She would have to face her lot in life head on, and knew she couldn't hide in Savannah forever. Yet she had had fun here. Much more fun then she had thought possible under the circumstances. Despite her misanthropic grandfather and not knowing any other soul, she had felt strangely closer to her mother. The image she had held all these years seemed to have come alive, as she had met people who had known Ellen as a child and a fifteen-year-old girl.

Now, she would be whisked away back into Atlanta society, not sure if she wanted to make that step back into the past. Though, she had no other choice and knew that when she saw Rhett's face. There was no one she was kidding but herself, she would suffer any slight discomforts in order to be close to Rhett.

Wordlessly he opened the door and stepped out, bowing as she made her way into the confines of the carriage and sat back with a frustrated sigh. As the carriage rocked forward, Rhett thoughtfully turned towards her.

"Take care of everything?"

"Yes," she simply said, calmly turning her head to stare outside. It was strange that she should be at such ease around Rhett and not want to throw herself in his arms. She supposed her tremulous feelings had calmed a bit and now she was in control.

But in an after thought, she turned her head and her eyes met his. "Rhett, how will it be between us in Atlanta?"

"Just like it's always been. People don't change how they act around each other, since its habit. You'll be your normal moody, self-centered self and I'll be around the house to take care of the children and make sure the… baby is provided for."

The concern he voiced was not for her, but only for the unborn baby. It hurt that he called her moody and self-centered, but she wouldn't let him see how it affected her. She was made of thicker stuff than that so she curtly nodded and she felt him watching her.

"Indeed, then that means I have a free reign to do what I want, is that correct?"

"If it pleases you. I could care less what you do, Scarlett as long as the baby isn't in jeopardy."

Her eyes glittered. "I would never hurt the baby."

"I believe you, Scarlett," he said, his voice sincere and the fight left her body. "Let there be a truce between us for the sake of our sanity and the children. I'm tired of fighting and, I daresay we'll be around each other a lot."

Mouth opening, to object, she closed it. Truly, she did what peace between them and was so tired of fighting. Nodding her head, she leaned it back, sighed and closed her eyes, finally surrendering.

"Very well, Rhett."

If her eyes had been opened she would have seen Rhett's eyes shining with hope and the briefest admiration before he smiled and looked out the window.

XXX

Watching Scarlett sitting at the foot of Wade's bed, Rhett was silently amazed at the change in Scarlett's relationship with the children. Since arriving in Atlanta earlier that day, both Wade and Ella had been inseparable from their mother and welcomed her back with open arms. Regardless of the fact that she had left them for weeks and Wade had been hurt and angry when Rhett had arrived, demanding why she had left and why he was always in Charleston, they were appeased.

The children had questioned why he was going to Savannah before he had left. Remembering the burning rage he had felt at receiving the letter for Pierre Robillard and news had reached him from Dr. Meade that Scarlett was pregnant.

_"Scarlett wanted to tell you the happy news," Dr. Meade had whispered. "But I felt that she might be in danger, disappearing to only God knows where so soon after her body has been through shock." _

_Rhett stared at him as if he had lost his mind, preparing to send a telegram to his mother at the post office. But the doctor was bothering him and not letting him go in and hurry home before supper._

_"What the devil are you talking about?"_

_His shaggy brows rose. "You mean, Scarlett didn't tell you she is pregnant?"_

From that moment, Rhett Butler knew what it was to feel raw anger and fear; it was a common occurrence being married to Scarlett. He had stormed into Henry Hamilton's office, demanding the whereabouts of Scarlett and when he had reached a dead end, fate seemed to be working for him for when he arrived home in a furious mood, one letter from a Pierre Robillard was waiting for him. Scarlett was in Savannah and without delay he packed a small bag and left the children with Pittypat Hamilton.

Now, only mere hours of arriving back at Atlanta, she had Wade appeased enough where she leaned forward to kiss him on the forehead and ruffle his hair.

"Mr. Williams asked about you," Wade was saying.

Her brows rose. "He did, did he? Well, you tell Mr. Williams that I am fine and dandy. Were Ella and you well behaved?"

Nodding, he laid back on his pillow. "Yes. We were so glad Uncle Rhett came back. He'll stay now, won't he? He's not going back to Charleston on business?"

A pause, and then, "No, Wade. Uncle Rhett will be staying with us a long time." She looked over her shoulder, silently bidding Rhett to get Ella.

Without hesitation, Rhett turned on his heel and walked to the next room. Ella's room that she had once shared with Bonnie before Bonnie had become afraid of the dark. Then the little girl had been a constant fixture in his room with her small bed beside his. Even now, he wasn't sure where the bed had disappeared to and didn't want to know.

Upon entering the room, he saw Ella was half asleep on the bed. She lightly moved her head and gave him a slight, dreamy smile. Walking up to the bed, he peered down at her with a tender smile.

"Ella, your mother and I need to tell you about a surprise," he told her, aiding her by pulling the heavy coverlet off of her body as she sat up, rubbing her eyes sleepily and fiercely yawning.

"A surprise?" she questioned.

"Yes, honey. Your mother will tell both Wade and you. Do you want me to carry you?

Agreeing, she allowed him to scoop her in his arms. His heart hurt a little bit at remembering doing the same to Bonnie, but he pushed those thoughts away. Ella wasn't Bonnie and he couldn't forget that. Perhaps he was missing Bonnie more so since he had found out about the upcoming baby.

In only a few moments that he entered Wade's room and set Ella on the bed, coming to stand near Scarlett who was still sitting on the bed. Her eyes met his a little nervously as she bit her lip. He gave her an encouraging smile.

"You tell them," he told her, waiting to hear how she would tell her curious children. Scarlett had never been articulate with thoughts and words, tending to blurt out the first thing that came to her mind. This would prove to be interesting.

"Well," she cleared her throat, turning her attention to the children. "You see, the reason why I went to Savannah was because I needed to rest before- well that is Wade and Ella, in September you'll have a baby brother or sister."

As many children would react, they digested the news slowly before both, well rather Ella squealed and threw her arms around her mother's neck. Wade, a little more subdued smiled, but both chattered on about names and the role they would play in the baby's life. It saddened Rhett a little who watched, feeling awkward, as if he were intruding on the scene.

Did he want this baby? When he had found out that Scarlett was pregnant with Bonnie, he had been elated though he hid it. Now, all he could conjure up was fear of loving another human that would bring him closer to Scarlett and further from Bonnie's memory. He had told Scarlett he didn't want to risk his heart a second time, well it seemed as if fate was stripping him of all his defenses and within six months he would be a father again, rather he liked it or not.

He didn't realize Scarlett was watching him until he looked up and saw the cautious expression on her face. She gave Wade one last hug before grabbing Ella's hand and she wordlessly walked past her. Like a bridled horse, he went through the motions of hugging Ella and giving her a slight kiss to her cheek, before rising to his feet to see Scarlett watching him with an indiscernible expression. Then she left the room to take Ella to bed.

"Good night, son," Rhett murmured as he turned off the gas light, plunging the room in darkness. Echoing his words, Wade moved on his bed until he was comfortable and Rhett's last sight was Wade turning on his side as he exited the room, shutting the door behind him.

Scarlett was just emerging from Ella's room and met him in the hall. A slight, almost relieved smile came to her lips.

'They took the news well."

He nodded and then pierced her with a look, his eyes searching hers. Wondering what she was thinking in that mind of hers, Rhett was surprised to find for once in all the years he had known her, he couldn't read her right away. Something had changed in her, though he couldn't name it.

"Shall we retire, Mrs. Butler?" he asked, bowing for her to precede him. But her brow merely quirked and she folded her arms across her chest.

"What is the sleeping arrangement?" she questioned, her eyes narrowed.

Rhett knew he couldn't sleep in his former room; there were too many memories of Bonnie in there. But sleeping with Scarlett might prove to be a mistake also. Wondering what he really was afraid of he shook his head, if he was planning on staying with Scarlett, then he would have to take a few steps to close the chasm between them he had placed. But by God, did he want to keep her at arms length.

It wouldn't work though. When it came to Scarlett, nothing was rational and now they were going to have a baby. So he stared at her and finally sighed, surrendering briefly and knowing she would be pleased by the situation.

"We'll sleep together in your room."

A glimmer of hope came to her eyes but surprisingly she didn't gloat. He followed her into the room he had so long been banished from to find it immaculate as if unused and it had been for a while. Her nightgown was all ready on so she merely sat on the edge of the bed and slipped off her slippers, wiggling beneath the covers and letting out a long, luxurious sigh, stretching like a pleased cat. In amusement he watched her and began to shed his own clothes.

"Won't you freeze?" she quizzically asked.

"I'll have a body beside mine to warm me up," he replied, smugly smiling at her blush. Her eyes dropped and he nearly laughed at her modesty. They hadn't been very modest and the child she was carrying proved that. For a moment that thought sobered him as he advanced toward the bed.

"Be sure to stay on your side," she told him as she turned over.

Lying is body beside hers, he looked over at her. Her back was facing him and he smiled as she buried her head in the pillow. "What, no good night kiss?" he couldn't help but tease.

Turning over, her eyes glowed with an inner fire and will. "I told you I wouldn't share your bed until you admitted you loved me. Well, I'm in your bed but don't expect kisses from me, Rhett Butler. Not until you admit you are madly in love with me, and not before that."

His brows rose at the absurdity of her statement. "You drive a hard bargain, Mrs. Butler."

"Good night, Rhett," was all she said as she closed her eyes.

Rhett knew a short time later when she fell asleep for her breathing lightened and her body untensed. Only then did he allow his hand to travel to her back where he lightly massaged her, glad that he could touch her without her knowing. This was his first night in bed with his wife and knew that many others would come of it.

They wouldn't make love until she wanted them to, until he admitted he loved her. She was willing to start a new life with him and this baby would cement their relationship. Did he love his wife still, he asked himself for the hundredth time since leaving her in October? Knowing soon he would come to the end of the road where he would have to admit he loved her or he would have to tell her their marriage from then on would only be one of convenience… Sighing, he stared at the ceiling long into the night.

TBC


	50. Won't Live Happily

Note: Wow I have finally reached chapter 50 and am excited how this story is going. I hope you all are still enjoying it and thanks for the reviews and support.

**Part 50: We Won't live Happily**

Blinking awake, Rhett was surprised to find a head on his chest, none other then that of his sleeping wife. Somehow during the night she had shifted over to him and now was using him as a pillow. Murmuring, she buried her face deeper onto his bare chest, her skin brushing against his, causing awareness to course through him, even if the gesture was innocent.

Usually he was out of bed, long before she woke up. He would be in the parlor, drinking his third cup of black coffee. But Scarlett's head on his chest and the warmth he felt in the bed didn't drag him awake. There was no pressing need to wake up and Scarlett pressed against him made him watch her unnoticed as she slept. She looked so peaceful and young despite the hardships life had thrown at them. This was there first morning together with an uneasy truce.

"Hungry," she mumbled in her sleep and he smiled. Even in her sleep she thought of food. It saddened him that she had went without food during the war, but amused him greatly that even in her dreams, her appetite for food was insatiable. Shaking his head, he tried to pry her body delicately from his, but her eyes fluttered open and she blinked, looking at him.

"Rhett?" she croaked.

"In the flesh."

She stared at him as if he was a dream and he hid a smile as he got up and placed on his robe. Feeling her eyes on him, he turned to look at her, laying amidst the blankets, in complete disarray for she did move around a lot in her sleep, hogging the blankets and such. Shaking his head once again, he couldn't believe that after all this time of fighting to keep her at a distance; they were back where they had started when they were first married.

"Rhett, where are you going?" she quickly asked.

"To get you breakfast, Mrs. Butler. We wouldn't want you to starve, now would we?"

A smile came to her lips. "No, oh and Rhett bring me eggs and ham please. Two plates."

His brow rose. "That much food?"

She rolled her eyes. "Not only for me. I was hoping you would join me."

Rhett exited the room, pleased. He headed toward the kitchen to ask the cook to prepare something fitting Scarlett's appetite. Later, he would go in and visit the children, the bank and then perhaps see Belle, although he knew Scarlett would have a fit.

Promptly he returned with the meal and came into the room. Scarlett sat amidst the rumpled coverlets, her legs crossed, looking rather content. Her eyes widened as she took in the food and as soon as he set it down for her and joined her on the bed; she dug into it with earnest.

"Slow down," he chided with a chuckle. "The food's not going anywhere, Scarlett."

She didn't listen to him of course and proceeded to swallow the entire contents on her plate. He had to smile when she even eyed his piece of ham and he set it on her plate with his fork. A smile came over her lips as she took tentative bites on his ham.

"Rhett, what are we going to do today?" she asked, an excited look coming to her face, like a child as she pointed her fork at him. "I know, let's go for a walk by my store and all the women will be pea green with envy for all the hateful things they said to me. Of course, I shall be as sweet as pie for it would not do well for the old cats to think badly of me again. I have quite the reputation in Atlanta now."

"In your condition Scarlett, it would not be wise for you to go gallivanting around," he said, gauging her reaction.

Her mouth opened in outrage, as he knew it would, nothing she did surprised him. "Now you are going to try to tell me because I am pregnant I cannot go outside? I'll have you know, Rhett, when I was pregnant with Ella-"

He threw up his hands to stop her attack. "I'm simply saying, Scarlett, that your standing has elevated in the eyes of the genteel society. They have come to see your charm in a different light and you wouldn't want to do anything that would offend them would you?"

"I suppose," she allowed, with a pout. "But you better make up for this Rhett and keep me company. I suppose I can always fix the nursery, it is far too dark." Her eyes lit up. "I can order new tapestries, furniture and toys for the baby. I do hope it is a boy with your looks."

His eyes softened, but he laughed. "Heaven forbid."

"Yes," Scarlett interrupted, an ecstatic smile on her face as she thought about her future son. "He shall have dark hair, your eyes and be the most handsome baby in all of Atlanta. We do make beautiful babies Rhett and he will go to all the children's parties like-like Bonnie. Everyone will love them and everyone will love me. No one will snub me or belittle me again, Rhett."

Rhett heard the determination in her voice and some part of him knew she would succeed if she could ever control her temper and restrain that feisty spirit of hers. It was startling he realized he did not want her to change. And should she change, he wondered what that would entail. For the first time, he had no idea what Scarlett's next move would be and that vaguely disturbed him. He sighed; raking a hand through his hair as he realized what he was about to tell her would ruin her mood. He told her he planned on going to Belle's.

A fit she did have. Scarlett stared at him as if he had grown horns, and perhaps he had. It had been a nice and cordial breakfast and then suddenly:

"Like hell you are! How dare you try to insult me? When I thought-I thought we were trying to begin anew and you say you want to go to that-that creatures! How would you like it if I pranced over to Ashley's?"

"So, some things don't change. Still trying to use Ashley against me?"

"Well, aren't you trying to use Belle?" she demanded, shooting the name out in disgust and a grimace. "I won't stand for it."

"As I recall, you have no choice in the matter."

"No choice? God's nightgown! As I have no choice to live with a man who claims to not love me? How dare you rub my nose in your dalliance with that creature when you know-when you know how I feel. You have no heart, you cad!"

"Perhaps I don't," he calmly replied. "In case you have forgotten I told you my heart was buried with Bonnie and no matter how much cajoling and batting your eye lashes you do, that fact cannot be changed. Even this baby won't make me love you, so don't get it in your pretty little heads of yours we'll live happily ever after."

Tears pricked her eyes but she held them in, her eyes narrowed, hurt and wounded. But her chin was set and her shoulders rose as if in a battle. She would not cry in front of him, rage, yes.

"How could I believe I loved you? Even Ashley Wilkes never disregarded my feelings. He was tender, sweet, even if he was a coward and weak, at least he respected me. But you, Rhett, you do not respect me. I'm just some pet you can kick, am I not? And I hate you for it."

"I see." He shortly laughed. "Well, it's a good thing this marriage is not based on love, is it not? It is only for the child and whatever respect I have left for you as you so aptly put."

In a move that surprised him, as quick as a cat, Scarlett grabbed the empty plate of eggs and shucked it towards his head. Rhett ducked and it hit the wall with a loud crash. With a cry of humiliation and hurt, Scarlett grabbed anything she could get her hands on and began throwing it at him, her chest heaving, eyes flashing.

"Scarlett!"

The insane look in Scarlett's blazing eyes frightened him. It was as if she could not hear his pleas as she continued her pursuit of him. He called her name again, all mockery and coldness gone from his voice. Striding forward while dodging her attack, he reached for her and she roughly slapped his arms away, backing up like a caged animal.

"Don't touch me! If you dare- I swear I will-"

Despite his protests, he pulled her hard against his chest. She fought him feebly before she settled in his arms. He was further shocked when her shoulders heaved and he realized she was crying, not gentle tears, but ones that shook her body.

"Shh," he soothed, rubbing her back and inhaling the scent of her hair. "Think about the baby, Scarlett. I am sorry for saying all those things, my pet, I'm just so used to them, and old habits die hard."

Her breathing returned too normal and she raised a tear-streaked face up to his. "Oh, Rhett, must we always hurt each other and be cruel. Can you not at least pretend you have some feelings left for me?"

"I do, Scarlett." His head lowered to place gentle kisses across her face. Her lips met his and she clung to him. For once he returned her kisses on his own accord, without the thought of saying afterward it was a mistake. The kiss grew heated and she was the first to pull away, her eyes dazed as she stared up at him, lips swollen, a tentative smile came to her lips.

"You won't go to Belle's, now will you, Rhett?"

"No, Scarlett, I won't go to Belle's."

Scarlett's grip on him tightened, as if she would never let him go. The staggering thing Rhett realized is that he didn't want Scarlett to let him go.

XXX

February passed and along with that so did winter. Spring hung in the air and the Butler's lived in a relatively peaceful situation. Rhett would occasionally visit Scarlett at night, read her some poems and then they would fall asleep next to each other. This was their usual routine and though Scarlett wanted more, she did not fuss. Even she was learning that sometimes it was better to remain silent. This was with the grudging thought she mustn't contestant lest Rhett decide not join her at all and heaven forbid stay at that Watling creature's establishment.

It was mid-April now, sometimes, as Scarlett could not leave the house, she sometimes snuck out when the children were at school and Rhett at the bank, she would think on how thirteen years had passed since the war. How long ago it seemed, usually she was not one to look back. Not a dreamer like Ashley, but more so now. She let her mind linger on the good old days and missed them. Perhaps she could persuade Rhett to take her to Tara again. She missed Mammy terribly, but Mammy refused to return to Atlanta saying she would die at home. None of Scarlett's pleading letters had done any good.

Mammy did agree however to come to Atlanta the end of August to be present to watch another one of Scarlett's children be born. Mammy trusted no one else to watch over her and make sure the baby was healthy. That would be months away and Scarlett was now showing, her stomach was certainly round and she felt ugly, like an old house. Since she was now months along and today was not a peachy day, she was riled and had snapped at the maid earlier. Something she had prided herself not doing in a long time, now she felt guilty.

It was her birthday today and Scarlett was now twenty-nine years old. It felt like any other day and certainly hadn't gone well. She cringed at the thought and was glad no one seemed to remember that it was her birthday. She had only one year left, and then she would be considered a middle-aged woman. It was awful and she could barely keep from crying. She was fat and now old, surely soon her hair would turn gray and her body would fall apart. What little chance she left of wining Rhett's love would fail and she would be all alone, the former belle of the county an old woman, once beautiful, but more beautiful women would come along. Scarlett did not want to be bitter and look at the younger women with envy, how humiliating it would be!

Feeling tired, although it was only the afternoon, Scarlett fell into her bed and let sleep over take her. Better to sleep through her birthday then think of her advanced age. She did not expect to sleep long, but ended up sleeping through suppertime and was finally awakened by Rhett when night had fallen. He hadn't wanted to disturb her, but looked genuinely worried at her flushed face and her exhausted state.

She woke up groggily to him leaning over her. "Scarlett? Wake up, my pet, you have been sleeping for hours."

"W-what time is it?"

Rhett looked at his watch. "Eight o'clock. Imagine that, sleeping through the joyous day of your birth!"

Scarlett groaned, burying her face in the pillow, her voice muffled, "It is not joyous. I had hoped you had forgotten it."

"If I had, I wouldn't be a good husband, now would I?" he asked and she felt the bed sink under his weight. He was sitting down near her. "Come, now Scarlett, it can't be as bad as all that. You are still young and about to become a mother. You seem happy enough about the baby."

She turned to look at him. "Oh, I am happy Rhett! But I am becoming as fat as Mrs. Merriweather and old! Oh, why do we have to age and become ugly for everyone to gawk at us? Soon I shall have gray hairs and have one foot in the grave."

He shook his head, amused. "Now remove that glum expression from your face and meet me out on the verandah in a few minutes. I have a surprise for you, Mrs. Butler."

Her eyes brightened and Scarlett couldn't deny she was curious. But as to not show him she was much happier he was with her, she frowned.

"Well, what is it?"

He laughed as he strode towards the door. "You shall see."

TBC

Next Chapter: Scarlett's birthday surprise and a little loving from Rhett. 


	51. Possible Love

**Note: Thanks for the reviews! This next part has a slight love scene, but nothing too graphic. So please enjoy and review!**

**Part 51: Possible Love**

Later, Scarlett came down stairs after splashing fresh water on her face and checking her reflection in the mirror. Dejectedly she deeply sighed at the state of her appearance and walked away, finding her shawl and placing it over her shoulders. Surely she did not look attractive and mourned at her state. Shrugging her shoulders, and with a toss of her head, she exited her room and went to the stairs. Unconsciously, she clutched the banister tightly and her steps were slow and cautious as she held her train in her free hand. Why on earth would Rhett want her to go outside at night to meet him?

To her utter astonishment she stepped outside on the verandah and gaped. There was a table set with plates of food, candles and Rhett was standing behind a chair, a smile on his face. It was a kind smile, the light from the candles illuminating his swarthy face for an instant, before he stepped in the shadows. Striding over to her, he stopped directly in front of her.

"I was hoping," he said, "that a candle-lit supper would be a proper gift for your appetite has er- increased substantially as of late."

After her initial surprise had faded, a warm smile came to Scarlett's lips and she lightly chuckled as Rhett pulled back her chair and she took a seat. Rhett was being so sweet and as he took his place across from her, she smiled at him.

"This is awfully sweet of you, Rhett. I do declare you take my breath away with your chivalry."

"Since you are trying to keep your reputation untarnished and have become a prisoner in our home, I decided it was high time you got fresh air, Scarlett. After all, you will be confined to the house for at least five more months."

Not needing that reminder, Scarlett sighed. She let her eyes wander across the dark yard and look up at the sky. Surprisingly, she had not touched her food yet, but breathed in deeply, admiring the beauty of the night. Often she did not appreciate it, but she had changed somewhat and found herself contemplative as of late and quieter as she thought of her life. She thought often about the baby, Rhett, the children and her future. Not money, for she had more than enough, but she dreamt of happiness and being a great lady.

"What are you thinking about, Scarlett?" Rhett softly asked.

Scarlett's eyes met his. Why did Rhett seem so different tonight? He had been aloof with her these past months. The only time they spoke was during supper with casual conversation and at night as they lay in bed next to each other. It was not long conversations, for Scarlett usually could not force herself to stay awake long once in bed. But now Rhett was acting kind and tender towards her. Being so very thoughtful and she felt a glimmer of hope. Could Rhett love her? She did not want to hope he did, since it had been six months since she had admitted her love to him and he had not returned the sentiment. Yet her foolish heart hoped.

She shrugged. "The children and the baby." It was an easy lie. "I want to begin to refurnish the nursery for Gerald, Rhett and buy new toys. I shall have to hire some one to help since well, since there is no one who can help me. The children shall be at school and you will be at work…"

"Gerald?" Rhett questioned with a quirk of his brow as Scarlett took a bite of lamb.

"I decided I wanted to name our son after pa. Sue… Sue didn't use his name so I felt it was only right that our son carry his grandfather's name proudly."

For a moment a smile touched Rhett's lips and Scarlett's breath caught. His face seemed softer than she had seen it in ages. Perhaps it was the candle light playing tricks on her mind or her own longings but her toes curled as desire coursed through her body for the man in front of her. He lightly chuckled.

"Should we have a son, I am sure he shall bear the name proudly and live up to it. But how do you know we will have a boy and not a girl?"

"Because I want a son," she stubbornly said. "I know you once said boys are no good to anyone but- I- oh never mind, it does not matter now."

"Come, Scarlett," he cajoled. "Tell me what you were going to say?"

Scarlett contemplated telling him. Should she ruin the mood by speaking of things that did not matter now? Taking a deep breath, she averted her gaze. Not wanting to say something that would offend him lest the magic of the night was broken.

"When I found out I was pregnant, after you left for London, I had hoped the baby would have been a boy. Now that I have the chance again, he just has to be a boy, Rhett."

Rhett was silent and she feared she had divulged too much. But he swiftly changed the subject and Scarlett was not sure whether to feel disappointed or relived. Rhett had not mentioned the baby she was carrying much over the past months. He was attentive to her yes, and made certain she was in fine health everyday, but had made little mention of how he felt about the baby.

They finished their meal in relative silence. Scarlett secretly would steal glances at Rhett across the table. She had learned to curb her desire for him and to detach her mind from dwelling too long on wanting him. But tonight, in the cloak of darkness, the candlelight flickering about him, she felt desire come over her. She remembered when she had been pregnant with Bonnie; she had been a little more demanding during their lovemaking and had for the first time initiated it. Rhett had seemed quite pleased with her demanding nature then.

Soundlessly Rhett rose to his feet and quipped a light observation about the meal. He surprised Scarlett by going to her chair and offering her his hand. Lightly she slipped her hand in his warm calloused one and for the briefest moment allowed her thumb to lightly rub across his. Their eyes met, green on black in the shadows.

"Rhett," she breathed, it was a plea, a dare for him to close the distance. Who cared now that he hadn't admitted he was in love with her? A part of her mind did care, but all that mattered was he was here and was not pulling away from her. He had not pulled his hand from hers. She was disappointed however when he released her hand and walked away from her. Heart plummeting in her chest, she watched him in confusion as he leaned down to pick up her shawl that had fallen to the ground.

"You dropped your shawl, Mrs. Butler," he lightly said, stopping in front of her to place it delicately over her shoulders.

His eyes were soft, intense. When he finally crashed his lips over hers, Scarlett was more than ready. A sigh emerged from her lips and she wound her arms around his back, clinging to him as he kissed her as if starving, different compared to his tender actions of that evening. Now he ravished her mouth and she prodded his mouth demandingly, her tongue entering his, she would not allow him to pull away.

He pulled away. "Scarlett…"

She was not listening and began to tug roughly at his cravat. Struggling in vain, Rhett finally said her name again and stopped her with his hands over hers.

"Scarlett…"

Glittering eyes met his, full of passion. "No, Rhett. No more speaking or I shall go mad."

"I was going to say that it would be a better idea for you to continue undressing me in your room. We wouldn't want the neighbors to see." He laughed.

"Oh! I suppose not." A playful smile came to her lips. She quickly headed for the door, Rhett close to her heels. Her heart was pounding with excitement. Both reached the room as quickly as possible and as soon as the door was shut behind them, Scarlett launched herself into his arms, her lips meeting his demandingly.

XXX

Much later, Scarlett lay content in his arms, sighing like a contented cat. A lazy smile was on her lips and her eyes gleamed. She did not voice what was on her heart yet, as her mind replayed their hurried lovemaking, passionate, urgent at first. He had been gentle due to her condition although she had tried to make him hurry by ripping off his shirt and trousers.

_"You are rather demanding," he huskily commented once completely naked in front of her and she sized him up. He was truly a fine specimen of a man, even in the darkness, as she stared at him her heart clenched. His desire was evident, his body alive with need, mirrored in his eyes also. If only she could read love in his eyes, but could not for the lantern was dim._

_"Undress me," she softly said, "but do not look, Rhett!"_

_His brow quirked. "What if I want to look, Mrs. Butler?"_

_She blew out a breath and her face lamed as Rhett's fingers expertly undid the buttons of her gown. "I am fat and unattractive because of the baby. Oh, I want the baby, I do, but you simply must think I look awful."_

_"Scarlett, look at me," he seriously said, turning her body to look at him. When she would not, he tilted her chin up and her eyes met his reluctantly._

_"I think you are beautiful, my pet. You could acquire a few more inches to your waist, but I'll always want you. You are like poison to my blood and God, even when you're pregnant, you are more beautiful." Then he surprised her by kneeling down and placed his lips against her abdomen, as if he were kissing their child and her. Scarlett felt tears in her eyes and ran a hand through his hair._

_"Rhett, kiss me," she whispered._

_He rose to his feet and complied. The rest of her clothing was removed and soon they were on the bed in a tangle of limbs and arms. Passionately kissing, their bodies lying against each other, side by side flush against one another. His lips traveled over her entire body and her breath quickened until she was begging him to finally take her. When he slowly entered her, her eyes closed in ecstasy and opened right in front of his._

_"God," he groaned. "Scarlett, God."_

_Her legs wrapped around his hips as he slowly thrust into her. "Rhett!"_

_Burying his face into her hair as his hips continued to crash into hers, he groaned. "God, Scarlett how can you think I didn't want you? I'll always want you. God, I love you."_

_Through her hazy state, Scarlett's eyes widened. Had she imagined his words of love? But when he groaned it again, she knew he loved her! His words caused her to arch and quiver against his body as she climaxed, sobbing his name. He shouted her name as he followed with one last thrust; he buried his face in her hair and held her tightly against him._

Now in the aftermath, Scarlett searched his eyes. There was a vulnerable look in his eyes before it was replaced with a neutral look, and he rose to his feet going to the window. She knew he was beginning to make sense of what he had divulged to her. But she had to know if the words were true or in the heat of passion. Pulling the sheet to her neck and wrapping it around her body, she rose to her feet and padded across the room to him. Placing a hand on his shoulder gently, he jumped under her touch.

"Rhett… I have to know if what you said was true?"

He turned to face her, distracted, not meeting her eyes. "What did I say, I don't remember."

"That you loved me. Is it true, Rhett?" She held her breath as she waited for his answer.

He stared at her a long moment before he walked away from her. She watched him from the window as he began to place on his clothing. His movements were jerky but Scarlett would not be deterred.

"Tell me the truth, Rhett," she tightly said. "I deserve that much."

"People say many things in the heat of passions," he said with a shrug.

How could he deny it? Feeling tears rise in her eyes and suddenly cold, she shivered. Eyes narrowing with hurt, she cried, "I do not care what people say! Damn you, Rhett Butler! I care what you said and I know I heard you say you loved me. Do you?"

"I don't know, Scarlett," he admitted with a deep sigh. "I don't have an answer. Maybe in time I will be able to tell you that I do, but now hell, I'm here aren't I? Isn't that enough?"

Although her heart sank there was hope. He hadn't told her he did not love her. Could that men there was a possibility that he could someday love her again? The expressions that filtered in his eyes were confusion but a deeper emotion of a man who has no wish to be hurt again.

She sighed. "I am not patient, Rhett. But if you promise me that you shall not push me away anymore, then I will not push you to tell me that you love me…"

"I might love you, Scarlett," he cautiously said. "I'm not sure if I ever stopped loving you or if I fell in love with you again. I need time. Are you willing to wait because I waited long enough for you, heaven knows."

Scarlett detested not pulling the truth from him. But if she pushed too hard, she knew he would push back. Patience had never been a virtue with her, but with Rhett she was willing to swallow her desires and give him time. After the baby was born and he realized he could love again, Scarlett knew deep down Rhett would admit his love. Turning, she headed for the bed and sat down, the sheet still wrapped around her.

"Come back to bed," she softly said with a small smile. She had given him his answer.

TBC

Next Part: Scarlett takes matters into her own hands and even gets to see Mr. Williams.


	52. A Small Defiance

**Part 53: A Small Defiance**

After Rhett had admitted her loved her and they had their ultimatum, he seemed to withdraw from her as a weary animal does. Scarlett nearly screamed in outrage as he was now gone more often. A few weeks passed, and she had kept her peace but now she was furious, today of all days after she heard from one of the maids where Rhett was.

_"He said something miss, about going to a saloon, to a woman named Miss Watkins," the maid said, stuttering with the name._

_"Miss Watling," Scarlett spat out in disgust. Her eyes narrowed and she angrily clenched her hands._

_The maid seemed frightened and she fled when Scarlett barked for her to get out of her room. After kicking over a chair, Scarlett's eyes roved around the room as she sank on her bed and tried to get her breathing to return to normal. Shuddering, she placed a hand on her stomach and realized it would do no good to storm to the creature's establishment as she had thought doing. She would bear it, she would play the silent martyr and look pained when Mrs. Merriweather and the other fat old cats crooned about how awful Rhett was and how badly she was being treated._

With that plan in mind, Scarlett realized Rhett had written his mother to tell of her pregnancy and she had received an excited letter months ago from Eleanor and Rosemary. But Scarlett had been so busy trying to underhandedly make sure the mills didn't fall trough, that she had not given thought to inviting the Butler's to stay with them. Rhett could not run off to Belle's if Eleanor and Rosemary came and would have to act as the proper husband. Smiling, she walked over to her desk and pulled out stationary, nibbling on the tip, she thought of how to pen it and came up with the perfect words:

**Dearest Eleanor,**

**I simply do not know how to write this to you. I'm afraid that ever since Rhett heard about the baby, he has been more withdrawn and is rarely home. Please, I would hope that you do not tell him this for I trust you and would not want him to know I have been complaining. But I cannot bear it anymore and pray that somehow I can win Rhett's affections once again. To get to the point, I was hoping and praying that you and Rosemary could come to Atlanta and stay with us until the baby is born. I would not want to be any trouble; it is only that those past months when I was in Charleston, I began to feel as if you were my own mother. Please do not write if you do decide to come. I would like Rhett to be surprised.**

**Yours,**

**Scarlett Butler**

Scarlett felt satisfied with the letter and promptly sent it off with one of the maids. Pleased with herself, she decided she would go pick up the children from school today. No doubt Rhett was busy or drunk, not in the right mind to pick up the children. Despite what Rhett might think, she had liked picking the children up from school during that time she had been in Atlanta after leaving Charleston. It was not as if anyone would see her 'condition' anyway for she would be in the carriage. However, Mr. Williams for some odd reason flittered into her head and she wondered how he was. At first she had disliked him immensely, but now found she had enjoyed the few conversations she had with him, she had felt like his equal.

With other men, they had always tried to make her feel as if she were the weaker sex. Pa had babied her; Rhett had belittled her for her naiveté, but not Mr. Williams. Detaching her mind from where Rhett was and what he did, she decided she would put on an act of contentment; she did not want to look awful, should Mr. Williams happen to see her…

XXXX

As soon as Scarlett arrived, it surprised her to see all the children running around the schoolyard. She supposed she had been too early in picking up the children. Turning her head, as she looked out the window, she spotted Wade and Ella. They seemed to have spotted her for they ecstatically waved and left their friends, running over to the carriage.

They both paused at the door, out of breath.

"Mother, where is Uncle Rhett?" Wade asked, frowning slightly.

"He had some business to take care of," she lied. "Aren't you happy to see me, Wade Hampton?" she chidingly asked.

"Of course, mother!"

Ella was grinning as happy as could be. Smiling, Scarlett watched as Ella turned and cupped her hands, shouting for Mr. Williams. Scarlett furiously shook her head; Mr. Williams could not see her in her condition! Not because it was immodest, but she knew she looked awful.

"Come here, Mr. Williams! Mother is here!" Ella continued to call out.

"Ella-" Scarlett began to protest. But it was too late for she saw Mr. Williams making his way toward she carriage. The spring in his step was distinct, more pronounced. There was also a broad smirk on his lips, becomingly over his stubble. Why, Scarlett hadn't realized how ruggedly handsome the man was. Shaking her head, and feeling briefly guilty for admiring another man, she pulled her mind from thoughts off her children's teacher.

He leaned his arms across her window, his stance relaxed, as he genuinely seemed happy to see her, his blue eyes dancing with warmth.

"Hello, Mrs. Butler, how are you this fine day?" he asked with bright cheerfulness, it seemed as if there was teasing tone to his voice. But he was genuine. His eyes were expressive, as if he were laughing at himself and the world, but not at her.

"Just dandy, Mr. Williams," she lightly said, her eyes dancing as they met his. "And you?"

"Just fine, just fine. I am alive and well, so I do not have any complaints." Then his voice became reflective, thoughtful as his eyes flickered away. "I haven't seen you lately to pick up Wade and Ella…"

Scarlett's face flamed. Certainly she did not want him to think her an unfit mother. "Well, I ah-well, you see, Mr. Williams, I am going to have a child in September and well-" she trailed off, embarrassed.

"I understand, Mrs. Butler," he sort of laughed. "A woman after all must not be seen, heaven forbid that in their weak and fragile condition they are able to enjoy life and do such grueling tasks as picking up their children."

She smiled. "Then you don't agree with women being forced to stay at home during their-time?"

He looked incredulous and shortly laughed. "No. It deprives me of the only company I have save children." He gestured over to the playing children. Ella and Wade had returned to the games. Finally he gave her a sidelong glance. "Think about coming by more often, Mrs. Butler. The children are thrilled whenever you come, and I… I would be pleased to see you."

Never had a man been so blunt with her save Rhett. Perhaps not so blunt, for he was merely telling her he enjoyed her company. She did not think he was flirting with her, but wasn't certain. Was he offering friendship? Realizing she desperately needed a friend and feeling warm that he seemed to enjoy her presence, she smiled, her dimples flashing charmingly.

"I certainly shall, Mr. Williams."

"Good," he murmured, "Good." Then he was gone just as quickly as he had come to the carriage. She watched his retreating figure and heard his commanding voice as he told the children to cease playing and come inside for their books and things. Watching them file one by one into the door, Scarlett laughed.

"Mother, mother," Wade demandingly repeated, capturing her attention from her thoughts.

"Hmm… yes Wade?"

"Does that mean you shall come and pick us up more often, me and Ella?"

"Yes, Wade it certainly does."

The children let out whoops of excitement as they led into the carriage beside her. Scarlett listened to their animated chatter, feeling lighter and happier than she had in weeks. This was short lived however when she arrived home and met Rhett's angry eyes.

XXX

"What the hell do you think you were doing?" Rhett demanded, arms crossed. As soon as the trio had walked into the house, Rhett had been waiting and had whispered for her to join him in their room. She had no choice but to obey, not wanting to cause a scene. Yet she knew by the tenseness of his shoulders and his stony face he was angry with her.

"And it is good to see you as well darling," she said with mock sweetness.

"Some things don't change, do they, Scarlett? You're still as unthinking as ever. Prancing off. God, don't you know in that fool head of yours, the accidents that-"

"Accidents? Oh, Fiddle-dee-dee. I'll have you know Rhett I-the only accident I had when pregnant was because of you, not because I was out 'prancing' around as you called it."

The barb hit him and for a moment she felt guilty pleasure. Knowing she should feel awful, a feeling of guilt assailed her as she saw the flicker of remorse in his eyes before it was wiped clean. Scarlett wished she could be sweet to him, but could not muster the feelings. After all, he was not being kind to her and had barely acknowledged her these past few months. If only the sweetness of her birthday, the passion could be recaptured. But it could not for Rhett was being unreasonable and she was through being a doormat and begging for him to show interest in her or the baby. Always at Belle's, or the bank or heaven knew where. He coolly chuckled, mirthlessly.

"Indeed, how astute of you, Mrs. Butler. You will not pick up the children anymore until after September, are we clear, my pet? I won't have you risk that fool neck of yours or the child."

She glared at him. How dare he try to control her with an iron fist and forbid her from leaving her own home? Depriving her of the only pleasure of picking up her children. It was not fair. Yet, Rhett could not keep her from corresponding with anyone she wanted. She could still enjoy the pleasure of Mr. Williams company. Smiling, satisfied with her plan, she shrugged.

"Very well, Rhett."

He eyed her skeptically. "I don't believe you, Scarlett. It is not like you to give in so easily."

She lightly laughed. "Perhaps I have changed. It may be hard for you to believe, Rhett, but I am not the same woman you married. Now, if you'll excuse me, I am feeling rather tired and shall go up to our room for a nap."

Smothering a giggle at the incredulous look on Rhett's face, Scarlett turned on her heel and made her way to their room. Once inside she threw her shawl on the bed and sat down at the desk. Pulling out a pen, she nibbled gently on the nib and dipped it in ink. Thus began her long correspondence with Mr. Williams for the next months. She did not question why she was writing him, and what purpose it would serve, but this was a small defiance on her part towards Rhett. If he could very well parade around town and visit that Belle, what harm would it be writing Wade and Ella's teacher?

TBC


	53. Flutter of Hope

Note: Thanks for the reviews I'm glad to have readers still interested! I'm loosing interest in the story as many of you may have guessed by my lack of updates. For a long time I was ten chapters ahead of myself, but finally reached the end of my writing. Yet I will continue although I can't promise how often.

In case there is confusion, with the time frame. It is even confusing to me, it is May of 1874. Scarlett is about five months pregnant. Soon I will get to write the new addition to the Butler family so this excites me.

I have one question however… would you rather Scarlett have a son or daughter? I thought of her having a son, but let me know your thoughts. Enjoy and please review. Oh and I also changed Mr. Williams first name from Rodney to Rexton.

Also dedicated to Raicheal who owns me now haha.

Part 53: Flutter of Hope

**Dear Mrs. Butler,**

**I sorely enjoyed reading your letter and was pleasantly pleased to receive it as well. You inquired many things about me as of my disposition and why on earth I would want to become a teacher were your exact words. I laughed at this for I gradually fell into the role of being a teacher; this was not a life held dream of mine. From your charming letter, I gather books bored you, though having heard from Wade you are quite accomplished with figures. If you need help anytime, feel free to ask me and I would be more than willing to oblige and be of any service. **

**In fact, I may be bold in asking you this, but I would hope perhaps next week on Friday you could meet me at the schoolyard after school is let out and join me for a late lunch. I shudder at the thought of offending you, for as I recall our first meeting was not agreeable with scowls and harsh language on your part for my unforgivable actions. Though your nature delighted me and amused me as well, you are a woman of fine attributes. I can see why Wade and Ella sing you praises. I meant no offense by my request and would not want to proposition you or you character in any way, Mrs. Butler.**

**Rexton Williams**

A smile remained on Scarlett's lips as she finished the entire letter. She could detect the faint amusement and admiration in Mr. Williams's words. In her letters, Scarlett freely wrote about the children, her job and her beliefs on the old guard and life as a whole. Most of her letters were light and playful, some a little melancholy. Certainly she steered clear of mentioning Rhett, the baby or her unhappiness. Never would she tell Mr. Williams about her hard fight to make Rhett love her and how he rejected her. Yet each letter she received from Mr. Williams this past week, now the second were gladly and eagerly received, a respite from the grim state of Rhett and her relationship, cool strangers.

So enrapt by the letter and staring off into space, Scarlett did not hear Rhett enter the room, until a voice cleared behind her hands she swiveled in the chair quickly to find Rhett questioning staring at her.

"Who is the letter from?"

Feeling slight anger rise and fear that he would misread the intentions of her correspondence, she shrugged and lied quickly, "From Aunt Eulalie." Then she felt bitterness sweep through her at his skeptical look; no doubt he thought she was secretly corresponding with Ashley.

"Who did you think it was, Ashley perhaps? I think it pathetic that you are so mistrustful of me after all this time and jealous still, even though you cannot admit it."

His brows rose and he calmly asked, "Are you trying to pick a fight?"

She laughed mirthlessly, staring at him coolly. "No, of course not. Why would I ever pick a fight? After all we are happily married with a baby on the way. One baby you have voiced no word of wanting. I have been refurnishing the nursery and all you can do is glare at me and act as if I were getting rid of…" she trailed off, realizing what she was about to say, whom she was going to mention.

"Rid of who?"

"Bonnie," she breathed angrily. "You act as if making a room for this baby in our life and wanting this child, I was being cruel and forgetting Bonnie! Do you think Rhett I could ever forget her? I loved her so, even though you claimed I hadn't. Then you hold onto the damn past, holding onto her so that you could never be happy with this baby. Remembering all the wrong I did to you so you could never forgive me. God's nightgown, Rhett! Isn't it enough that I have not spoken with Ashley once since you returned and have avoided him because of you." She shook her head. "No, it's not."

Scarlett knew she had struck a nerve for Rhett's eyes were cold as he glared down at her. "You're still cold hearted. Telling me to forget my child. I will never forget Bonnie even if you have and presume that you can somehow atone for the past through this child, Scarlett. You can never make up for wanting to get rid of Bonnie before she was even born and neglecting her due to your selfishness. No, I won't ever let you forget who you really are. Hell this baby you're carrying could be Ashley's or Mr. Williams for that matter."

"Mr. Williams," Scarlett began, her jaw clenching. "You dare to insinuate-"

"I have heard talk about you being seen wit Mr. Williams in public and how friendly you two looked. People talk Scarlett."

Despite her attempts, she felt tears well in her eyes. Being pregnant and under so much stress made her more emotional as of late. She expected Rhett to mock her or assume she was acting, but he surprised her when she heard his soft footsteps approach her. He stopped in front of her and placed a hand on her shoulder, she trembled at his touch.

"I'm sorry, my pet. Look at me, Scarlett."

She did so.

A gentle smile came to his lips. "Let's have a truce. I know you're not having an affair and how do I know that?" A smug look came to his face. "You love me."

Not sure if she should be offended by his smug manner, she incredulously stared at him and somewhat cautiously. "I thought you believed I didn't love you."

"I didn't," he admitted for once, truthfully. "But I realize that your damn stubbornness paid off. Sometimes I believe yours is an infatuated love, but the fact remains you want my child. You never wanted children, Scarlett, especially mine so I conclude your words are true and you love me."

Her mind whirled with frantic thoughts. Should she be relieved finally after all this time Rhett believed her? However she was weary he would now use her feelings against her. She hated being vulnerable to him, under his power. Always had and bitterness welled in her.

"How nice for you," she bit out, eyes flaming. "If you think you can use my feelings against me, you are sadly mistaken. I might lov- care for you, Rhett, but I shan't be a rug you stomp on."

"I don't intend to stomp on you, Scarlett. I wouldn't be as cruel as to do that. My intent was to assure you I didn't believe the gossip and it's not even the old guard saying that. They have defended you most adamantly. Actually they called on us earlier while you were napping, but I didn't want to awaken you… you looked so peaceful sleeping."

More confused by his sudden change she murmured, "Thank you." A silence filled between them until suddenly she met his searching stare, one mirrored in her own eyes. A stare Rhett had known all too well, the search for love.

"Why do you love me?" he asked, open interest on his face, no hidden intent, only honesty.

This was a side of Rhett Scarlett hadn't seen in a long time. Staring at him, heart lodged in her throat by his stare, she didn't hear him at first then when his words registered, her eyes widened.

"W-what?"

"Why do you love me, Scarlett. What changed? Before you detested me and called me the dirt of the earth, spitting upon my face."

He sat on the bed, acting as if he was not leaving and would be there a long time to listen for once to what she had to say. Impulsively, Scarlett rose to her feet and slowly walked over to him, sitting beside him. She stared at her hands a moment, her face conflicted.

"I changed, Rhett. I know you haven't believed me, but after you left me with Bonnie I missed you both terribly. It was a gradual change as I realized I needed someone else other than money or myself. Money couldn't keep Bonnie alive or keep you with me. Then Melly died…"

She let out a sigh, her eyes squarely meeting his. "And I felt as if my heart had died as well, then you left me. I couldn't keep Bonnie or Melly, but I knew that I had to fight hard to keep you, because I realized you had always been there and that… that I loved you and had for ages, but had been so blind. But you know, you hurt me too it wasn't only me. I admit I am mostly to blame, but you haven't made it easy on me either."

"I know," he admitted, his hand grabbing hers and bringing it to his lips, almost tenderly. "But I shall try. I can't promise you my love yet, Scarlett, but know that you have my heart in some way still."

"Truly?" she suspiciously asked.

He grinned. "You are a suspicious woman, my pet. Yes, I do still care for you and my heart appears to be attached to you as well despite my determination and stubbornness to not make it so."

About to prod on what he meant, Scarlett let out a breath as she felt a flutter in her stomach. It was the baby kicking and wonder filled her face.

"What is it?" Rhett anxiously asked.

Instead of answering she drew his hand in her to her stomach and placed it there. The baby moved against his hand and Rhett felt it. For a moment it appeared as if he would pull his hand away as if burned, sadness and reluctant eagerness on his face. Their eyes met, his hand still planted on her stomach.

"It used to bother me so," Scarlett admitted. "Knowing I was carrying a greedy child that kicked and I had to feed, it drained me. Now… when I feel the baby I believe I feel as Melly did, as if his baby was God's blessing."

"I thought you didn't believe in God, you served mammon," he teased.

"Oh Fiddle-dee-dee, Rhett. I'm not a heathen and my mother raised me to believe. I could never believe as strongly as her, but I sensed as she read from the Bible that if she said God were real then He must be. Besides I once told you I knew there was a hell, didn't I? Well, if there's a hell, then there must be a heaven."

"Maybe there is," Rhett, murmured, his hand still on her stomach. "Maybe there is a heaven, Scarlett, and we're all fools."

"I'm no fool," she confidently retorted, her hand coming to cover Rhett's gently. Their eyes held and she leaned over and kissed Rhett on the mouth. He didn't pull away but returned her embrace.

TBC


	54. A Great Love for Portiers

Note: Well, here we go again. Sorry if this chapter isn't that good, I literally wrote it within a day's time. Usually I take more time, but wanted to give my readers another chapter. This story will start picking up more soon and I was planning within a few chapters for the newest addition to the Butler family to be born. Enjoy and review.

Part 54

Perhaps Scarlett did regret her rashly sent letter inviting Eleanor and Rosemary to Atlanta. Not that she did not want them at their home, for she had missed them, but now with Rhett giving her attention, she was nervous her intent would have the opposite affect. Perhaps Rhett would be too embarrassed to show her open affection as he had been doing as of late. Either way, it worried her. Everything worried her, as life had during the war. Where she would pace at night and have dark circles under her eyes. Surely this wasn't good for the baby.

Although Rhett had been attentive to her she doubted he noticed her stress. So when he sat beside her on the settee, a few weeks later in the parlor and took her hand in his, her eyes met his in surprise. Enrapt with thought, she hadn't heard him enter the room. The house had been relatively quite with the children off playing at Beau's.

"I'm worried about you," he voiced.

"Whatever for?"

"I have heard you pacing at night. I feel your absence in bed for hours on end, but didn't want to pry. What's worrying you so that you can't share it with me? I have been more open haven't I and I am willing to help you with your burden."

She sighed, her eyes looking at his tanned hand over hers. "It's my own burden I must bear, Rhett. This baby, as much as I want it, I'm afraid I shan't be a good mother and then you… I fear I shall never win you over and you won't love me again, truly as you used to. There is so much I could fail at and money isn't one of them. At least… at least with money it was something I could own by hard work. Emotions on the other hand are completely different."

Standing up, she moved to the window to get away from him, looking vacantly outside to reach composure. The sun was shining brightly, signifying summer around the corner and she felt a sudden wish to be outside, walking down the street and no longer imprisoned due to her condition. When she felt hands on her shoulders, she nearly jumped. Rhett placed his mouth against the side of her neck and she shivered.

"My pet," he gruffly whispered. "You will be a good mother, you are now to Wade and Ella. Never have I seen such a transformation and Atlanta sees it as well. When you set your mind to anything you succeed. As for me, you know feelings change as do circumstance. What you want, I can't fully give you yet, but I can give you something else you want," he finished wickedly.

"And what do I want?" she flirtatiously asked.

He moved closer against her, so that she could feel the evident desire he felt for her. Breath catching in her throat, she scarcely breathed lest he pulled away, an ever-constant fear. Slowly turning around, her eyes met his, dark eyes filled with desire and her brows rose. "The question is what do you want?" she demurred.

"My wife."

Stepping forward, she wrapped her arms around his neck, bringing his lips a scant inch from hers.

"You already have her. Now, Kiss me, or I shall go stark raving mad."

"Very well, Mrs. Butler, if it's my kisses you desire, you shall have them."

Then his lips were against hers and time stopped, at least for her. Time never stopped, it was her enemy, but now her savior. For in time Rhett was kissing her, holding her, in time she would have this baby she dearly wanted. Life was nearly perfect, if only he loved her... But his lips against hers, his body against hers was enough for now. More than enough as they moved towards the settee. Clothing was removed; barriers between them and Scarlett let Rhett take the lead this time.

XXX

"That was earth shattering," Rhett agreed breathlessly after they lay in a tangle of limbs and clothes on the floor. Scarlett on her side, facing Rhett so that her stomach was protected.

They had made love on the settee, but the poor piece of furniture couldn't hold their weight together for long so they had moved onto the floor. Now in the aftermath Scarlett was certain the whole house could have heard her moans, the neighborhood for that matter. Coincidentally due to the carpeting Scarlett had picked out years before, it was quite comfortable.

Blushing, Scarlett's eyes dropped. "It was. But I still wonder if you think I am fat and cringe at my figure."

"Good Lord!" Rhett laughed. "Scarlett, Scarlett, you're going to be the death of me. What do I need to do to make you believe I find you attractive? I thought my performance a little bit ago would have proven it and eased those silly fears."

Her face nuzzled his neck. "Oh, Rhett, I'm sorry. I just-well it's hard to believe that you truly care and don't just want my body. I'm so used to…. Men just wanting me for my body and not my mind."

Reaching out, he pushed a tendril of hair from her face and drew her closer. "Never doubt I quite enjoy your mind. It always challenged me and I always sought to be in that pretty head of yours."

"You have succeeded, darling." In a moment of tenderness, her lips met his and the passion blazed between them quickly.

Both were so caught up in the moment, hands roving hungrily across each other. It was unforeseen a knock would sound on the closed door. Both froze, Scarlett jumping to her feet and grabbing her clothing, a look of horror on her face.

"Yes," Rhett called out, laughing.

"Mistah Rhett, Miss Eleanor and Miss Rosemary is here," Prissy called through the door.

Surprise registered in Rhett's eyes. He looked over at the horrified Scarlett, face pale and clutching her clothing to her body as if she were Eve and had just committed an unforgivable sin. What bad timing that any relative could have.

"Hold on, Prissy. Tell them they can come in… in a few minutes."

As Prissy's singing died away, Scarlett and Rhett both frantically began to put on their clothing. Rhett was dressing first and Scarlett's mouth dropped open.

"Rhett!" she hissed. "Help me get this damn corset on!"

Scarlett still wore her corset for modesty sake, but didn't tighten it. Oh, the horror if Eleanor and Rosemary saw her naked. They would know what Rhett and her had been doing. Of all the days they could arrive!

"Clam down, Scarlett," Rhett laughed as he tied his caveat.

Then a knock on the door. "Rhett, we're coming in thirty seconds."

The voice belonged to Rosemary. Scarlett had no choice, but ran towards the window and hid behind the long portieres. She could taste the dust and coughed. Truly, she would murder the maid for not keeping her house cleaner. Then the door opened and she heard feminine voices address Rhett.

"Mother," Rhett joyfully said. "What a pleasant surprise. And Rosemary, my dear sister. Have you married yet?"

"Marriage ha! As if I would lie down for a man and let him rule over me."

Scarlett heard Rhett chuckle and wished he'd move his mother and sister out of the parlor so she could make a quick dash for their room. But Rhett, as happy as he pleased, was engaging them in a conversation about how Rosemary should marry and give him nieces and nephews. She would strangle Rhett later, much later.

"I'll be out in a moment, mother and Rosemary," he was telling them. "I gather Pork helped with your luggage."

The door shut behind them and Rhett laughed. He walked over to the portieres and pulled them away from Scarlett's half naked body. His eyes roved across her body, enjoying her discomfort and the view. Opening her mouth to make a sharp comment, she sneezed instead and Rhett threw back his head and laughed.

"I don't remember hearing you sneeze ever. Darling, I should have realized you had a great love for portieres when you came to visit me in my jail cell fashioning the green drapes. Now, history repeats itself, I see."

Stomping forward, she hit him on the shoulder. "You cad, oh I'm embarrassed! If they would have seen me, oh what would they think?"

"That we were madly in love with one another, married and couldn't keep our hands off of each other. Don't worry, Scarlett I shall give them a tour of the outside so you can escape unseen to our room."

She placed a grateful kiss to his lips and he grinned as he headed out of the parlor, closing the door behind him and whistling softly. After Rhett left Scarlett wasted no time hurriedly dressing with difficulty and heading out of the door. Placing a hand over her stomach at the baby's insistent kicking, Scarlett muffled her laughter in her hand at the situation. At least Rhett didn't know she was the one who had invited Rosemary and Eleanor to Atlanta. Some things were better left unspoken.

In the safety of her room, Scarlett fixed her appearance and forlornly put on one of her dresses, which the sides had been let out. She thought of Mammy being so proud of her once sixteen-inch waist and of Lou helping her dress after giving birth to Bonnie. Her figure would never be the same after this and she felt hideous even though Rhett had tried to appease her fears. Sighing, she left the room to meet her sister-in-law and mother-in-law.

If only she would have known that Rhett would have to run to an errand to the bank, which would leave her going to pick up the children from school with Rosemary, and an encounter with Mr. Williams would ensue.

TBC


	55. I Believe You

Note: Here is the next part. I wrote it quickly after procrastinating forever. Thank you, my reviewers for all the wonderful reviews for the last chapter. They keep me going. I hope Rhett's behavior is a tad more acceptable in this chapter. Hahaha. Enjoy and please review.

Part 55

Sitting beside Rosemary in the carriage, Scarlett stared out the window, listening to half an ear what Rosemary was rambling on about Charleston. Her mind was preoccupied with Rhett. A smile on her lips, face flushed from what had transpired hours before. Oh, how she loved him, despaired that he would ever love her. But he was willing to give her a chance and said he might love her, it should be enough. It was enough for now, having him there with her and sharing her bed. Enough to settle in his embraces and forget everything in his arms. Enough to feel desire course through her with each touch.

"We have arrived, Scarlett," Rosemary announced, her attention now focused on a book she held.

"Hmm…. Oh!" Scarlett blushed, realizing the carriage had stopped moments before and she yet noticed. "Well, Rosemary aren't you coming with me?" she asked, amused.

As long as she knew Rosemary Butler, a book was often in front of her face. No wonder she had no husband. Not to say a woman with smarts couldn't catch a husband, but Rosemary was off in her own world. How would she ever see a suitable man walk by? Silently, Scarlett decided after the baby was born and should she ever return to Charleston, she would find Rosemary a husband.

"No… I would rather finish the book. I shall see the children soon. Go ahead, I shan't tell Rhett you ventured off on your own."

"That's a relief," Scarlett said, smiling. "Rhett acts if I were a fragile china doll that will break. I shall return shortly."

For some reason, Scarlett's heart picked up when she looked towards the doors on her journey towards the school and spotted the familiar face of Mr. Williams. His grin broadened upon seeing her. As she reached the steps, her hand reaching out to grasp the railing, suddenly his hand moved over hers. Warmth. Surprise registered across her face, her eyes flickered to his. Across his face the expression showed uncertainty, as if she would scoff at his advance. Although she should, the words couldn't form at her lips.

Scarlett realized how much she enjoyed the simple touch, done on his initiative. A kind touch and he didn't seem to expect anything in return from her. Unlike Rhett, for if he touched her it was either with an ulterior motive or because he acted as if it were his duty. He never held her out of genuineness and even their lovemaking made her question why she gave him her body, but he wouldn't take her heart. Enrapt with her thoughts, she didn't realize the children told her they were heading for the carriage.

"Tell Rosemary, I'll be right there…" she said to Wade. "I'm going to speak to Mr. Williams about-Ella's progress."

Wade nodded, his eyes drifting to Mr. William's hand still over his mothers. "Yes, mother," he mumbled, hurriedly departing towards the carriage. As soon as he was out of sight, entering the carriage, Mr. Williams nodded towards the schoolhouse.

"Shall we converse inside?"

"Yes," she whispered and followed him in. As soon as the door shut behind them, she opened her mouth to speak, but he beat her to it. He sat on the edge of his desk, his blue eyes drawn to her face. A slight smile settled on his lips, a kind one, and his dimples showing.

"I have missed your letters, Scarlett. Immensely. I didn't want to be as bold as to touch your ungloved hand, pray forgive me. It's just at seeing you, my day brightened considerably and I felt the need to touch your hand."

Not accustomed to a man being so genuine, well except Charles, but he didn't count for he had been like a dumb, fatted calf, Scarlett nervously laughed. She headed for the window to look out.

"You are a smooth talk, Mr. Williams."

"Must everything be a joke with you?" he softly asked, no malice in his voice. "I assure you, I am sincere. Scarlett, this is hard for me to admit, I know you are married and have a child on the way. But I fear I have come to admire and love you."

She spun to face him, her hand at her throat. Once she would have gloated and played the cat and mouse game. Yet this had changed. She couldn't do that to Rexton Williams. The conscience was evil that way; whereas many would have once said Scarlett O'Hara was not dictated by it.

"I-I can't," she murmured, preparing to flee, but he caught her shoulder, turning her to face him. She came to rest against his chest. So broad and warm, like Rhett. But unlike Rhett, he wanted her there. His hand soothed her hair gently, hesitantly, as any gentleman would do.

"Scarlett, forgive me," he pled, his voice deep. "I would by no means compromise you or hurt you."

Head tilting back, she stared up at him. "I-I know. Oh, Rexton, you must see I love my husband. I'm carrying his child. Despite your feelings for me… they cannot be. I can and must only be your friend. If-if only I did not love my husband, it would be so easy to choose you. You are wonderful; no man has treated me so kindly except my pa. But-"

"Say no more, Scarlett," he softly said, resting his cheek against hers. Her eyes closed, she felt his stubble against her cheek. It was comforting somehow. "I withdraw my deceleration. If it's a friend you want, a friend I shall remain."

Shoulders relaxing, Scarlett sank into his embrace. Her eyes met his as she pulled back. Still filled with warmth. Placing her hand tentatively to his cheek, she cupped it and leaned forward, placing a gentle kiss to his cheek.

"Thank you, Rexton. I shan't see you until after my baby is born. But I hope that you will still receive my letters."

"Always. Now go in peace and take care of yourself. You know where to find me," he joked.

Nodding, Scarlett left him with one final glance and hurriedly headed for the carriage.

XXX

When Rhett came to visit her that evening, she knew something was wrong. Sitting at her vanity and brushing her hair, she eyed Rhett through the mirror. His hands were shoved deep in his pockets and a furrow between his brows as he thoughtfully looked at her. Confused, Scarlett turned in the chair and folded her arms over her stomach.

"I'm no ninny, Rhett. I know something is wrong."

"Wade came to me with a concern… about Mr. Williams and you."

Feeling fear rise up in her, she forced herself to remain calm and turn back to the ministrations of her hair. Despite her fear, she wouldn't let it master her. Sometimes she was the master of keeping her expression calm, but Rhett had always read her like a book.

"Mr. Williams and I? Whatever for?"

Rhett sighed. "Wade saw Mr. William's hand over yours. Scarlett-"

Spinning around to face him, she quickly stood up, nearly knocking the stool over. Fire in her eyes, chest heaving. How dare he throw accusations at her! Always blame and cruel words came from him. Well, not that time. High and mighty Rhett Butler wouldn't dare to accuse her and throw stones at her.

"Now you shall dare to say I'm having an affair with him," she hissed. "Merely because his hand was over mine? Oh, that's fine coming from a man who never had the decency to hear me out about Ashley embracing me at the mill, which was purely innocent. But just holding my hand isn't innocent enough for you, Rhett?"

He raked a hand through his hair and sat on the edge of the bed. "Scarlett, I wasn't going to interrogate you and say you were having an affair with Mr. Williams. Good God, woman! Can't you see that I believe you and despite the mill gossip and any other thing, I know you have a conscience and you wouldn't do anything to jeopardize us or the baby's reputation."

The fire left her eyes. "Then why did you bring it up?" Pulling her skirt out o f the way she sat back down on the stool and eyed him defiantly. A slight grin twitched at his lips.

Strolling over to her, he placed a hand on her shoulder, leaning down and lightly kissing her neck, sending shivers down her spine. The breath from his lips warm against her skin. "I wanted to tell you I have come to trust you over these past months. I wanted to tell you I believe you, Scarlett. I never trusted you in our marriage, but I do now."

"You do?" Scarlett dumbly parroted. "B-but I have done nothing that you would trust me."

Tilting her chin up, he stared her in the eyes. "You're carrying my child and that's enough. You have done everything in your power to make a god name for the baby. It hasn't escaped my notice you haven't ventured outside much despite how insane it drives you being locked up… Did I tell you I was happy about the baby?"

"N-no, you haven't. Oh, Rhett, are you truly happy about the baby? I know I am dreadfully happy about it."

Smiling, he placed a lingering kiss to her forehead. "I am, my pet. Never doubt it. It might be difficult, because of Bonnie and as odd as it sounds, it's hard for me to let any child take her place. But know, Scarlett, the idea of this baby has grown on me and I'm not adverse to a new baby. Now, you finish your hair and come down for supper. Mother had the cook make something special."

Speechless by all Rhett admitted, she watched him walk towards the door. Heart pounding madly, she called his name and rushed over to him. He paused and turned towards her questioningly.

"You forgot to kiss me properly," she explained in a rush.

He laughed, pulled her into his embrace and kissed her passionately, in a way he hadn't in a long time. Bending her over his arm, giving her the kisses, which made her head swim and feel dizzy. The way he had proposed to her so long ago in Pittypat's parlor. When he wouldn't let up, she feebly and breathlessly turned her head away.

"I think…. I shall faint."

"Please don't," he joked with a twinkle in his eyes as he released her. "I fear I wouldn't be able to carry you. It would break my back."

She swatted him on the shoulder and flounced away. "Oh, you go away. I'd like to see you carry a baby, Rhett Butler!"

His laughter followed him down the hall. Sitting back on the stool, Scarlett stared at her reflection in the mirror. Happiness radiated from her eyes and she grinned. Placing a hand on her stomach, new excitement for the bay to be born washed over her. Only a month's time and she would hold Rhett and her new baby. With a gentle hum, she rose to her feet and headed for the dining room.

TBC


	56. Georgia Carolina Butler

Note: I am so sorry it has been months but for the longest time I was depressed and didn't have the will to write. Here is the next chapter and I would like to thank Raicheal who hounded me and gave me the name for the baby and the inspiration for this chapter. And to all the others who so kindly reviews and asked me to continue. I am hoping the characters are believable, it's been so long since I have written Scarlett and Rhett. I fear I might have put too much in this one chapter and rushed, but here it is. Thank you all and reviews are always appreciated. Any typos, which there are many since the document froze while trying to edit and inconsistencies I apologize for in advance.

PART 56

With a start, Scarlett awoke in the middle of the night, disoriented, but feeling warmth seeping through her legs. This was the sign, the very thing she knew after three pregnancies, she was going into labor. Rhett lay next to her and she nudged him in the shoulder, he didn't awaken so she slapped his shoulder hard and he sat up with a start.

"What the hell?" he muttered.

"Rhett," her vice quavered. "It's time. You need to go fetch Dr, Meade."

Rhett blinked in confusion and any other time Scarlett would have found it endearing, but right now she was annoyed that he was being so slow. Had he drank? She didn't smell any whiskey on his breath.

"Rhett!" she cried, feeling slight pain and frustration rise in her chest, that got him up quick and he hurriedly began to dress in the dark, fumbling and Scarlett lit the light for him, the light of the lantern flickering across his face, his brows furrowed with concern. As he headed towards the door, he stopped and turned going back to her and taking her in his arms. Giving her a gentle kiss on the lips/

"I'll be back soon, Scarlett. You'll do fine."

She chuckled and then grimaced. "Well, I'm not going anywhere. Just hurry with the damn doctor."

"I shall!"

In a flash Rhett was gone and he must have alerted the whole household before his departure for Rosemary and Elanor flocked into her room. Rosemary still dressed in her nigh clothes, her hair done in a way that made her look like a maid. However Eleanor was dressed and not one hair out of place though she had rudely been awakened by her son, how on earth did Eleanor look so elegant even at 3 in the morning?

"Darling," Eleanor soothed. "How are you feeling?"

"Like a woman in labor," she grumbled and looked a little sorry for being so rude. "I'm sorry, Eleanor, I just don't rejoice in childbirth though I can't wait to hold the baby."

Eleanor gave her a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. "I know, darling, I did birth three children and each time loathed the labor, but afterwards... well you know." She smiled.

"Do you hope for a boy or girl, Scarlett?" Rosemary asked, trying to distract her.

Scarlett smiled gratefully. "Well, truthfully a boy."

"What does Rhett want?" she pressed.

Opening her mouth to answer, Scarlett closed it again. "He never told me," she admitted. "Said it didn't mater to him." Bitterness seeped through her saying that, but Eleanor didn't notice.

"Of course it wouldn't matter to Rhett. He loves all children. As long as the baby is happy and healthy he won't care if it is a boy or a girl."

"I wonder," Scarlett murmured, picking at a nonexistent piece of lint on the coverlet. If Rhett didn't admit his love for her after she bore his child with love, what hope would there be? Why did he seem to care and yet wouldn't admit it?

"When did Rhett come in?" Scarlett asked Rosemary and Rosemary looked away. She knew.

"Rosemary," she demanded. "When did Rhett come back from wherever he went tonight."

"An hour ago," she murmured, looking sorry.

Anger filled her and a sense of defeat. So Rhett had been at Belle's and he hadn't been drinking, which meant he had slept with a whore. He was a coward and she never had no use for cowards. Anger fueled her, pain physically and in her heart. When Rhett entered shortly with Dr. Meade she turned her face away from his searching stare.

The doctor took over and Scarlett looked at Rhett with a blank stare. "Please go. I don't want you to see me... like this," she lamely finished.

"But Scarlett-" he began.

"Leave," she ordered, sighing.

Dr. Meade stepped in when Rhett didn't move. "This isn't fitting for a man to stay in here. Please leave as your wife said Mr. Butler."

Giving Scarlett one last pleading glance, Scarlett didn't return his look or meet his eyes as he left, the door shutting behind him. Tears welled in her eyes and she was glad she could blame it on labor.

XXX

The labor was one of the worst of Scarlett's remembrance. She wondered if it had anything to do with her fall down the stairs and losing the baby she had so desperately wanted. Of course God would cause her unbearable pain when she actually wanted a baby this time. It hadn't been so with Wade, she had him so quick and painlessly that Mammy had marveled and Mammy had seen her fair share of births in her long lifetime.

"Scarlett bare down and push," the doctor ordered and Scarlett nearly cried and laughed at the situation.

She was about to tell him to go to Halifax, but decided word would get around and that's all she needed was putting her in a bad light so Rhett could use it against her. Crying out, she felt the baby coming. Sweat beaded her forehead and she loathed Rhett, it always fluctuated but now that he didn't care when she was happily giving him a child was the last straw so to speak. This baby-her baby she would dote and throw all the unwanted love she stored for this child.

She felt the baby leave her, felt a rush of fluid and pain and then just as quickly it was gone as a small cry pierced the air. A gentle, weak cry and Scarlett opened her eyes, scanning anxiously for her child.

"Dr. Meade, what is it?" she asked.

"A healthy baby girl, but she's very small..."

A girl. Disappointment filled her and then just as quickly she shook her head. No, this was her baby and she wanted to see her.

"Give her to me," Scarlett weakly ordered, voice growing stronger as Rosemary and Eleanor cooed over the baby. Wrapped in blankets they brought her over to Scarlett and the mother started at her new baby. She was tiny, yet so expressive as she opened her mouth in sucking motions and let out a murmur, a lot more quiet than Bonnie had been at birth, red faced and squalling. Why, this baby was like Melanie's temperament, She let her finger run across the baby's silky cheeks and tears filled her eyes.

"She's, why she's beautiful," Scarlett choked in surprise. "I-want to name her."

"Do you want me to go fetch Rhett?" Rosemary asked and when Scarlett didn't reply, she again said, "Scarlett?"

"No, tell him he has another daughter, but I want to rest and so does the baby. Her name shall be Georgia Carolina Butler."

Rosemary left to tell Rhett the news and Scarlett cradled the baby in her arms, staring at her with adoring eyes. For once she knew what it was like to love a child she bore, from the moment the baby was born and realized even more what Melanie had fought for. Babies were a blessing Melanie once said and Scarlett agreed, running her finger down the baby's cheek.

Rhett sat with Wade and Ella. Again as in the birth of Bonnie, he gave Wade some Brandy to celebrate. The boy was older after all and as he poured the drink for Wade, nostalgia washed over him. Remembering when Bonnie was born. His heart clenched for the briefest of moments.

Mammy waddled around more tiredly sue to her old age and gave Rhett a look. "Now Mistha Rhett I be thinkin' you're gonna have a girl."

"Certainly not Mammy! I'm going to have a son. One... Bonnie was enough. I wouldn't be able to have another little girl," he finished softly. "No one could ever take Bonnie's place."

"The chile wouldn't take Miss Bonnie's place, but the Lord does work in mysterious ways Mist ha Rhett an' perhaps he's wine give you another chance with a lil girl chile to love her for he took away Miss Bonnie too soon."

'I am dead set on a boy," Rhett only said and turned his attention back to the children. "What would you children like?"

"A boy!" Ella said. "Who would play with me unlike Wade." She stuck her tongue out at him and he glared at her.

"A boy would be nice," Wade said, "since I am always surrounded by girls."

Rhett chuckled just as Rosemary emerged, looking tired but very happy. "The mother and child are fine, brother." She smiled broadly. "You have a beautiful baby girl."

A pain pierce Rhett's heart and he mutely nodded as she ushered him in to see Scarlett and his new daughter. Scarlett lay her green eyes looking at their child and her head rose as he entered. She gave him a neutral look and shrugged. "You have another daughter, Rhett."

"So I see," he said.

"Hold her," Scarlett ordered.

Rhett shook his head, but Scarlett cooly objected. "Rosemary bring Rhett his daughter please."

Feeling stuck, the baby was placed in Rhett's arms. So tiny, a lot tinier than Bonnie and he looked down at her face, feeling inner turmoil as he saw her rosebud lips, delicate features and she looked even prettier than Bonnie a thought that made him feel blasphemous for no child, even another daughter could be prettier than Bonnie. Murmuring something he hurriedly gave the child back to Rosemary and looked at Scarlett who was watching him, then her eyes dropped and he couldn't read her.

"I want to be alone with Georgia. Will everyone please leave?"

"Georgia?" Rhett asked, surprised.

"Georgia Carolina Butler," she said, vice growing stronger though she looked pale and tired. "Please leave."

Everyone did as she said except Dr. Meade. Scarlett watched Rhett leave, her heart hurting. It seemed she never could please him and she realized that was the truth. She couldn't so she fashioned in her mind she would cease and please Atlanta, please the old guard, herself and her children. By becoming even more of a lady and bestowing Rhett's unwanted love on Georgia. Damn Rhett. She knew his look well after thirteen years. He hadn't wanted a child and it wasn't her love he was refusing this time or some material possession, it was his own flesh and blood.

Yet she couldn't make herself hate him, she hated his actions, loathed him for the hurt, but she couldn't blame him fully. She understood his pain and hurt. From this day forward Scarlett realized as she stared down at Georgia, she wasn't going to try to be Rhett Butler's wife or love. She wasn't Scarlett Butler in her heart, she was still Katie Scarlett O'Hara of the Irish blood and didn't need a man to validate or fulfill her. As soon as she was up again she would tell Rhett she was through with him. Not rudely, but politely and honestly. She had wasted enough time on him and his rejection of their daughter was the final straw. She would never forgive him or forget that. Never and she knew she had will like iron.

XXX

The children adored Georgia Carolina Butler as did her grandparents and all of Atlanta as Scarlett brought Georgia everywhere with her. Not to the store, but when she was shopping or taking a stroll down the lane with her baby, alone or in the company of Ella or Wade. Rhett was a;ways absent and people speculated how once a man so besotted and doting on his daughter could act coldly and be absent in his new little girl's life and she was such a pretty quiet girl. Well mannered though Scarlett did spoil her for Scarlett wouldn't let her daughter behave as a brat. It was rumored as well that Scarlett had moved out of her husband's room.

One day when Georgia was two months old Scarlett came home and found Rhett in the study. She shut the door and eyed him, he looked up.

"Yes, Scarlett?"

"I want to open the nursery up again for Georgia, Rhett. I have my mind set on it, but I was letting you know so everything would go smoothly. The people are coming in tomorrow to remodel it."

"If hell they are," he coldly said. "That was Bonnie's room and Bonnie's room it shall remain."

"Bonnie is dead," she said emotionlessly, "and the sooner you accept that the healthier you will be Rhett. You have a new daughter now, she is not taking Bonnie's place, but she is your flesh and blood. You haven't once held her since she was first born. You're a coward and I won't just shove her off in some corner and let her be hurt by you. I don't answer to you Rhett."

"I could take everything away from you," he said.

"I'm not afraid of you and you're a bastard. I don't love you anymore Rhett, I could never love a man without a heart. Once thought your heart was black, I respected you, but not now. Georgia will be loved even if it's not by you. You're a worthless excuse for a father and I hope deep down someday you'll see her grow and see her be sought after and loved by a decent man. Then one day you'll regret it Rhett and I hope you suffer for making her suffer. Good day."

She left Rhett's study, feeling angry but forced the expression off her face as she saw Wade and Ella. "Mother," Wade said, "can I go play with Beau?"

"Of course. I am going to be busy running errands anyway."

"Can I too, mother?" Ella asked and Wade rolled his eyes.

"Copy cat."

Scarlett hid a smile, feeling a little better. "You both may go, but I want you home by supper."

They agreed and left, Scarlett heading to her room where Georgia lay in her crib, soundly asleep. Checking on her Scarlett went to her vanity and sat down, eyeing herself as Mammy came in and saw Scarlett's forlorn expression.

"What is it chile? You can tell ole Mammy."

"It's Rhett," she took a breath and shrugged. "He doesn't want Georgia or me. Me I understand, but not his own daughter. I hate him Mammy."

"No you don't."

"You're right." Scarlett stiffly nodded. "But I don't love him, at least not as much and it's hard to find even tenderness for him now or pity. It's strange someone can love someone so fiercely and then hate them just as fiercely. No, I don't hate him, but I don't love or respect him. He's like a stranger now Mammy. Everything I once loved about him and wanted from him, I don't. I have my own money, I have my children and am for the first time accepted and being a good mother. That's all I need."

"You need love Miss Scarlett. I doan wanna see you be like Miss Ellen."

"Mother? What do you mean Mammy? Ma loved pa!"

"In her own way shedid love Mistha Gerald, but her heart belong to another. Her cousin Mistah Phillipe. He died Miss Scarlett and it doan near broke her heart and mine to se mah poor Miss Ellen die inside. You need love Miss Scarlett, dats something even money or children woan gibe ya."

All this was new information to Scarlett and it slightly bothered her for she had never seen a light in her mother's eyes. In many was Ellen had become the woman she hadn't been, a great lady and Scarlett had lost Rhett too in a way, perhaps she was more like her mother than she had thought. She heard Rhett's footsteps down the hall then he was gone, she heard the latch of the front door open and she sighed. _Well good riddance _she thought and stood up, flattening her hair with her palm.

"I don't need love Mammy not from Rhett. He only knew how to love Bonnie purely and now she is gone. Rhett and I are through Mammy and I would rather forget him and I share the same house. I shall be cordial fro the children's sake, but if he thinks-"

A knock on the door sounded and Scarlett being irritable opened the door and hissed at Prissy, "Are you trying to wake up the baby?" But then her voice softened. "I am sorry Prissy, what is it?"

"A man is here to see you Miss Scarlett! He says his name is Mistha Williams."

"Rexton," Scarlett squeaked in surprise, but composed herself. Mammy shot her a look.

"Whobe dis Mistha Rexton? Dona tell me-"

Holding up a hand, Scarlett stopped Mammy. "No, Mammy he is merely the children's teacher and that is all. Now if you will excuse me I shall go meet him in the parlor." With one last fleeting glance at the sleeping face of Georgia, Scarlett headed out of her bedchamber and headed down the stairs to see Rexton standing there, eyes awkwardly flickering around until his eyes met hers and he smiled.

She held out her hand and he lightly kissed it. "Hello Scarlett," he said in his deep, kind voice. "How are you?" he thoughtfully asked.

"Well," she said as they walked into the parlor. "I have a new daughter now named Georgia."

"Where is she?" he interestedly asked.

"Upstairs asleep."

"That's too bad. I wish I could have seen her. I am sure she is just as beautiful as you, very beautiful. Scarlett-I wanted to apologize for my misconduct in declaring my feelings for you. I am over them now and ready to be friends."

"Oh." Why did she feel slight disappointment? Love wasn't her forte she knew. "I am glad Rexton..."

"May I ask one question, do you still love your husband?"

A pause and then, "No, but I have my children to think of. I am happy and content for the first time in my life even without my husband's blessing. I answer to no one and am able to shower love on Ella, Wade and Georgia. I would never give that up Rexton and this means staying in my current state."

"Could you love me?" he asked. "Marry me and divorce Mr. Butler. Ah Scarlett I have loved you for awhile now." He gently grabbed her hand. "Give me a chance, I could make you happy, very happy."

She stared into his earnest face. He didn't seem besotted, but a strong man, not a coward as she was realizing Rhett was. Opening her mouth to reply, she shook her head but didn't stop him as he gently lowered his lips to hers and she felt his stubble gently brushing her cheeks. And she kissed back because it had been so long since she had been kissed with feeling and knew the man cared for her, he loved her and though she didn't think she could love a man again, the kiss was healing and Scarlett pulled away as she heard a throat clear. Looked over to see Rhett and she squared her shoulders.

"Rhett," she cooly said and sighed seeing his angry expression.

"I must be leaving," Rexton said, bowed and then walked right past Rhett, not seeming afraid. Then he turned back towards Scarlett and gave her a hopeful look.

"I'll be here Scarlett if you need me."

Nodding, she watched him leave then turned back to face Rhett. "Well, what?" she asked. "After Georgia was born I told you I had no desire to be with you anymore, but for the sake of the children. Can't we be friends Rhett? That's al I want now and I shan't give you the benefits of being your wife and my bed if you don't love me still after all I have done. Saved you from dying, defended you and gave you another child. Well, do you love me?"

"And if I did would you say you wouldn't be consorting with that man again? I saw how he looked at you Scarlett and you looked happy kissing him my pet."

"I was. At least he gives me warmth and loves me, unlike you. I don't want to fight. You're evading the question."

He sighed, looking still jealous. "You have grown up Scarlett. I think I might, I could love you if..."

"If what? If I gave you a son, if I was more like Belle? If's Rhett, always if's. Let's preserve out friendship, but since you don't love me I won't sleep with you again. I could never after the way you treated me and for turning our back on Georgia. She's two months old! I-want a divorce. I have thought it through and there is nothing to keep you here anymore."

"No," he said.

"No?" She raised her brows, scowling. "Why the hell not?"

"Because I want you. Because it isn't convenient now Scarlett. I came back for the child."

"A child you don't even see or love! You have no more excuses! Just get out of my sight, Rhett. Stay away from me. I don't know-I just can't bear you and you were right, we should have amiably parted instead of me chasing you and coming to this. At least I have Georgia now and still have my dignity and love. I'm going to speak to Uncle Henry to draw papers up."

His eyes flickered. "You really want a divorce? Just like that you give up? Come, this doesn't sound like you."

"Well," her chin notched. "I have grown up and know a lost cause when I see it."

XXX

Later, Rhett snuck into Scarlett's bedchamber at night. She was in her study and he had the urge to see his daughter. It hurt too much to see her, but Scarlett had been right. Isn't this why he had come back, to be a father and be a better man? He had failed and now Scarlett seemed truly over him. Heart pounding he entered the darkened room and saw the baby. Sleeping in her crib, her lips making gentle sucking motions. As if she knew someone was there, she awoke and stared up at him, lightly smiling. Even in the dim light he saw her beautiful eyes, hazel a bit like Ella's but with more green and her shape of face was like his slightly though she had baby fat.

"Georgia," he whispered and closed his eyes. His hand wanted to reach out and touch her cheek, but he couldn't. That is when she let out a cry and began to whimper for some reason. Feeling helpless Rhett reached out and grabbed her without a second thought. It was the first time he had held her and she continued to cry.

"Shh baby," he soothed, pacing with her until she began to quite. His eyes met hers and he felt his resolve to stay away from her slowly slipping. Thought of Bonnie and said he wouldn't risk his heart again.

Hearing a noise, he looked up to see Scarlett wordlessly standing there in her wrapper. Couldn't read her expression as she stepped forward and took the baby in her arms. Their eyes met and she raised a brow.

"Are you ready to be her father? I am not asking you a lot Rhett or to love me, but be as good of a father as you were to Bonnie if not better, for I won't have her be spoiled."

"You were right, you know," Rhett softly admitted. "I am a coward in regards to her and to you. Even if I can't say the words doesn't mean I don't feel them towards you, Scarlett."

She inhaled and looked confused. "What words Rhett?" she then impatiently asked, "Quit speaking in codes like Ashley."

"That I love you."

TBC


	57. She Is Tired of You

Note: Thank you all for the reviews and here is the next chapter! I am picking up my speed again. It might slow a bit since I just started my classes again, but I am getting into DOT again so there is no reason not to continue. Many of you really dislike Rhett and I fear I might have wrote him poorly. I haven't still decided after all this time if Scarlett should stay with Rhett. What are your thoughts? Or do you think they are better apart? I think I went a little slower in this chapter and hoped I didn't rush. Please review!

PART 57

"You love me?" she asked hesitantly, feeling her foolish heart lighten with his admission.

He nodded bleakly. "Yes, I do, Scarlett."

But no. It wasn't supposed to be this way. An admission of love was supposed to be happy and joyous. She wanted him to take her in his arms, smile broadly and rain kisses on her. How long had she waited for this? A few years and now after all this time he was saying it. And in her mind she had imagined it a million different times and ways. Not as he was doing it now, as if he were a man convicted to die. Closing her eyes, she took a breath.

"No," she said.

"No?" he questioned quizzically.

"No, Rhett you may say you love me, but I don't believe you. I don't want that sort of love. First you love me then hide it from me. Admit your love, but take it back and claim not to care, Now, after all this time you say you do but you say it grudgingly. I won't play your games anymore and I don't know if I even want to be your wife anymore. I think the best course of action is for us to be friends and that is it."

He laughed incredulously. "I say I love you and that's all you say? Throw my love for you back in my face Scarlett? I love you damnit, there I have given youyour precious words."

"Why thank you," she sarcastically murmured. "Once I would have been happy, but now I don't care. I don't feel that sort of love or want that kind Rhett Butler. I won't hold it over your head or try to use it against you. I just want to be left alone by you..." Her voice nearly broke as she stared into his dark eyes, searching them, she let out a breath and wanted to step forward and throw herself into his arms, feel love from him, not the kind he offered as if he were a man convicted to a painful execution.

When he stepped nearer to Scarlett, she froze and he reached out and grabbed her. Feeling the warmth of his hands on her shoulders and his breath made her want to surrender, but she shook her head, even as his lips descended on hers and they kissed. Kissed as if it were there last and she could taste the bitter sweetness of it. Then she pulled away.

"I am going to the store," she announced, as if none of it had ever transpired. "I'll see you for supper or do you have other plans?"

"None," he said, eyeing her with confusion. She nodded and turned away.

"Good then. I shall see you later, Rhett."

Her mind was spinning, but Scarlett was learning the fine art of bridling her tongue somewhat and keeping her feelings in check. Rhett loved her. _Yes, I do Scarlett. _But she couldn't forget the _No, I don't love you _of the last two years. She was just so tired of it all and even though she wanted to surrender and see if they could make amends, she wasn't certain she was ready yet or wanted the love he offered. Yet she couldn't ignore it all together and sighed, turning back and quickly heading down the hall and opening the door where Rhett still stood, unmoving.

"You love me, Rhett?" she asked again, "because I cannot have the sort of love that is given as if I were forcing you. I never forced you to love or want me. I never wanted your love until after Melanie died and I sure as hell am not begging you anymore for your love. Thought when someone loves someone they would declare it better or with some semblance of happiness. Do you not want to love me Rhett? After all this time when I have proven that you can love me safely and freely?"

Feeling her heart waiting and nearly breaking as Rhett eyed her with no expression and sighed, tiredly running a hand through his hair. "No, Scarlett," he wearily said. "I don't want to love you even though I do. It is safer not loving you. I don't want to risk my heart a third time and I am again. This is too complicated and messy now and I wish to hell I could turn off my feelings for you."

She swallowed painfully, but wouldn't cry. "Then you're saying you don't feel free or safe in loving me. You have qualms and would rather feel nothing for me?"

"Yes."

Nodding, she felt hurt. Really, she should have known. Scarlett bitterly thought this admission shouldn't surprise her for Rhett always thought about himself and not on how much his rejection and words cut deep. The man before her was selfish and a coward, yet she couldn't gather enough feeling to hate him, really she had expected this and laughed mirthlessly.

"I see. Well, that's that. You needn't worry. I don't love you anymore so you aren't obligated to love me or force yourself to remain in that state. I never wanted to force anyone to love me, I thought if I tried hard enough I could be firsts in people's hearts, but I have grown up and I'll be damned if anyone is forced to put up with me, let alone love me... I thought I had proven myself to you that you could see I was trustworthy and not out for my own benefit Rhett, for the first time in my life I am being there for others as Melly was, but you don't see that. You are blind. Blind Rhett Butler and I am glad-so glad that I have come to see that I can live without you after all."

Her green eyes pinned his and were gleaning with unshed tears. She showed him her pain, her hurt but her strength and nodded, even as he tried to offer her a handkerchief. At one time she would have taken it and launched herself into his arms like a small child, this time she didn't need him to lean on. The strength rested on herself.

"I don't need it," she said, pushing his hand away, then she turned and headed towards the door, head held high.

"Scarlett!" he called out, almost desperately.

"Yes?" she asked, not turning back to face him for he would see her turmoil and the hundreds of emotions crossing her face as she bit her lip lightly.

"Do you really not love me anymore, Scarlett?" he asked, stepping nearer to her and she could feel his body heat behind her, his hand settling on her shoulder. The warmth. "You and I are meant for each other, I suppose. We always have been and now that I want to give us a try you run, why?"

"If you don't know why," she said in a breath. "Then you're even a bigger fool than you realized.

His hand dropped and she breathed a sigh of relief until he slowly turned her toward him and his eyes searched hers. "What do you want Scarlett?" he asked in a breath. "For me to declare my love for you happily? We both saw what love does to people and what my love did to us? I was mad with jealousy and you never returned it. Then you suddenly loved me and my love for you was used up. It's understandable why I would be weary isn't it, Scarlett?"

Yes, she knew he had a point, but she had waited so long for those words and he didn't want to love her to begin with, not even now and was forced into it, as if he didn't have control and it was against his will.

"I understand. And you must understand how it doesn't make me feel better to know you feel forced into loving me. It seems we are at cross purposes again, doesn't it Rhett? Let's just go on as we were before, you not loving me and I am used to the idea now."

"But I love you damnit Scarlett!"

"Not enough. You never loved me enough to fight for me or to try to win my heart. You could have won so easily Rhett had you treated me nicely and not used everything against me to punish me for not loving you in the beginning when I loved Ashley. You were so cruel and if that's love then I don't want it Rhett. God's nightgown what has become of us? Please, just stop Rhett and let's forget everything..."

"Scarlett-"

"No! Damn you! No more Rhett, please? I have to go check on Georgia."

A sigh filled the room. His sigh and for once he listened to her and that surprised her most of all. "I'll do it."

She nodded. "Thank you Rhett."

As soon as he left the room Scarlett let herself cry and muffled the tears in her hand. Finally, she got his love, but wasn't happy. The world she had made for herself this past year with expecting and having Georgia, the composure and feeling of being content was gone to pain, raw pain that Rhett's words had left. Those words, his words had always cut deep and she was left reeling and wondering if perhaps she had accepted his empty words if they were better than none. No, she wouldn't settle. How were the actions of a man rejecting their daughter and sleeping with whores love?

She needed fresh air and checked the nursery before she left, checking on Georgia to see Rhett holding her and softly speaking to her, Scarlett listened unnoticed:

"You are very beautiful Georgia, just like your mama. I am sorry I have been a bad daddy, but I'll be better." He gave her a gentle kiss to her forehead and Scarlett saw he was off in his own world and she understood that, wanting to forget the past and pain, her wrong doings. Rhett was being the father he should be even if he wasn't the first class husband.

Quietly she crept away and ordered her carriage to be drawn, luckily Mammy was too old to accompany her so Scarlett rode t her destination, her mind thinking about her daughter and Rhett. The little girl was loved so much by her that Scarlett finally understood the maternal love that Ellen had showered on her and that Melanie had showered on all she knew. A sort of love that was unselfish, well the kind of love Rhett had felt for Bonnie, she finally felt that for Georgia. The name had been chosen by her because she had wanted to leave a part of her and Rhett to her daughter. Georgia for the beloved state she loved so much, which held Tara and Caroline for South Carolina.

Despite Rhett's protests she knew Charleston meant a lot to him and held him as Georgia held her and always would. Now, she wanted something for herself, some pleasure of another's company, the company of Rexton, he had left hours before, upset and Scarlett couldn't bear doing that to him.

XXX

When Rhett noticed Scarlett was gone he felt vaguely disappointed and at a loss, this surprised him because denial was his friend. For months he told himself he didn't care where Scarlett went or what she did, but now he was admitting he did care and he wanted her with him. One of the nurses would watch Georgia as Rhett decided perhaps he needed to make steps again to gain Scarlett's acceptance for she wouldn't seemingly accept him again and was making it difficult.

_ She is going to make this hard _he wryly thought and he, Rhett Butler realized he'd have to take steps and court his wife again in a way. He didn't feel a huge flood of love for her, but deep down he knew he loved her and had admitted it to her. With trust and working at it, he was sure their love or marriage would grow stronger, which meant cutting old ties with Belle.

Not complete ties as in seeing her and visiting, but it was no secret he slept with Belle and a few other of the working women. Especially when Scarlett had kicked him out of her bed years before. After that sleeping with tons of women didn't make him feel guilty because Scarlett hadn't cared. Even after she had admitted her love to him years later, sleeping with other women became a habit with him because he didn't wan to get that close to Scarlett and be vulnerable. No feelings were needed when sleeping with whores, but when sleeping with Scarlett, feeling always seemed to get in the way and cloud his mind.

Many people weren't surprised when Rhett entered Belle's establishment to see him head right to Belle, but they were surprised to see the grave expression on his face as he walked over to her. Belle right away gave him a charming smile and looked very happy to see Rhett, many thought she was in love with him and in a way it was true, but everyone knew Rhett Butler loved his wife even if they were estranged and many didn't fully understand the current state of the Butler's marriage.

"What is it Rhett?" Belled asked as they stepped into a private room. "Do you want some companionship or is it about Scarlett? What has she done now?"

"I love her," he slowly said, the words sounding strange to him now, but they had always been true. "I intend for her and I to be happy together this time. I am telling you this Belle because you a are a great friend and-"

"Don't want me to be hurt?" she asked.

"And that too." he sat down beside her and took her hand in his, earnestly staring in her face. "My days of sleeping around are truly over and I mean it this time Belle. There is only one woman for me and it's Scarlett. It has taken me a damn long time to finally accept she loves me and for me to be able to voice it after Mrs. Wilkes and Bonnie died. I need her Belle and have never learned how to live without her. She doesn't believe me, but I intend to prove that I love her."

The woman dryly laughed. "Oh Rhett. I believe people can change, but not like that you know habits stick with us a long time."

"What? Are you saying Scarlett hasn't changed-"

"No, I am saying you haven't that much Rhett. Miz Butler has changed a lot and noticeably show. Why she dotes over that daughter of yours and I always see her with those damned biddies now. You, Rhett Butler are a wandered and not meant to be tied down. In a few weeks you'll be back here when she doesn't let you back in her bed to be asking for a more wiling woman. I think you have used Scarlett's love so much she is tired of you and doesn't want you anymore."

Frowning, Rhett wondered how his good friend could be saying that about him. She had been with him for years and had helped him through the worst of his marriage, telling him to go home and tell Scarlett he loved her, Now, all of a sudden she was changing her tune.

"Don't get me wrong Rhett," Belle added sighing, "You and Scarlett could have been a great thing but you two much were alike and now you're just too different. Miz Butler has grown up Rhett to see how you are and what she sees she doesn't like. If you are serious you're going to have to give this up for good and your running around, drinking and anything else that you do to forget the past."

"And I can do that," Rhett confidently said, never doubting himself. "You're wrong Belle, Scarlett isn't tired of me. She may claim to hate, but she doesn't hate long and when she sees that I really lover her then she'll want me again."

_Poor Rhett _Belle thought knowing she had once loved Rhett and hated seeing him like this. She didn't want him to get hurt and he was like Scarlett in the sense when thing didn't go his way he worked and worked at it until he got his way. Eyeing him contemplatively she glanced at her fingernails.

"I sure hope so," Belle mumbled. "The way I see it, Rhett is that Scarlett is mighty stubborn and when she has her mind set on something then that's it. Didn't you once tell me that before?"

"Yes and things are different now. Scarlett is different."

"And do are you? You're so different Rhett," Belle sarcastically added, "that you're going to be the model husband and gentleman like Ashley Wilkes?"

The only answer was Rhett roughly striding away and slamming the door behind him.

XXX

Got out of her carriage from a block up and walked to his home, lightly knocking on the door. Surprisingly he answered right away and his pale blue eyes widened in surprise.

"Scarlett?"

She stepped in and wrung her hands. "Yes, Rexton... I'm dreadfully sorry for what happened earlier. My husband-"

"No, no my dear," Rexton cut in. "You needn't explain." He smiled warmly at her and looked a little nervous.

"Oh, but I do. Rhett-he-well I have loved him for years and he rejected me even though I deserved it. Now he claims to love me and I feel like I can tell you-I'm not sure if I love him anymore. Oh, Great balls of fire Rexton, I am so confused. Why is life this confusing?"

"Because," he dryly said, "life wouldn't be so entertaining and newsworthy/ It adds life to it Scarlett to feel and experience. You don't need all the answers now my dearest."

Her eyes met his at the endearment and she stepped forward, reaching out and slipping her hand through his. Their eyes were locked and she saw Rexton wanted to kiss her, but refrained from it, for that she was grateful for she was too confused right now with Rhett's admission to add more to her problems.

"Uh," he cleared his throat. "Would you like some tea or is tea not strong enough for you?"

"Tea would be lovely," she smiled widely as he led her into his parlor.

TBC


	58. In the Millionth Time

Note: All your reviews greatly encouraged me so I thank you all for liking my story and reviewing! It means a lot and I seem to be on track posting again. Yay! This part is also dedicated to Raicheal who gave me a few ideas I used in here. Currently it is November of 1874 in the storyline in case the timeframe is confusing. It was sort of hard to write Scarlett and Rhett's interactions, but I hope I did them justice. Enjoy!

Part 58

When Scarlett returned home before supper and walked into the nursery first to check on Georgia, the little girl was being tended to by Ella and Wade who were already trying to teach her at the young age of two months. Telling her stories of Rhett being a pirate and Scarlett a fair damsel need of rescuing from the evil war. Scarlett smiled at the sight and walked in. Both Wade and Ella looked up and in unison said, "Mother!"

"Hello darlings," she greeted, giving them each a kiss on their cheeks and grinning at Georgia. She picked up her daughter and gave her a loud kiss on her cheek, which made the baby giggle.

"Did you miss me?" she asked the little girl, who didn't reply, but stared at her mother. "I doubt it, but you will someday I assure you." Chuckling Scarlett let Ella take Georgia back into her arms.

"Uncle Rhett just left the nursery a few minutes ago," Wade said, his brown eyes searching his mother's. "Where were you mother?"

Her brow rose and she was surprised with the grave look on Wade's face. It wasn't often her son openly questioned her, but he seemed troubled. The other thing that confused her was why he pronounced Rhett's name to her.

"Why to visit Mr. Williams of course. We had tea and talked, Wade Hampton. Why the sudden questions?"

"I don't think you should visit Mr. Williams so much mother," Wade bravely stated and Scarlett's mouth dropped open in surprise. "It's just," Wade quickly added, "I have heard people talking..."

Her cheeks heated up. "And what have they said Wade?"

"That the both of you were very close and I think it upsets Uncle Rhett too. He really loves you and I-" he trailed off, looking uncertain.

"Go ahead Wade," Scarlett dryly said, "you already began this conversation and might as well finish what is on your mind."

"I think you should spend time with Uncle Rhett. He loves you mother and I know you love him. Uncle Ashley and Aunt Melly always did things together so why don't you and Uncle Rhett?"

"Your Aunt Melly was a different person than Rhett or I. I am too busy with the store and taking care of Georgia and Rhett is busy with-busy with his business ventures. We haven't the time like Melly and Ashley had. I can't just set time down and spend hours with Uncle Rhett Wade, surely you understand?"

"But you and Uncle Rhett used to sort of be happy. You'd dance together and talk. Laugh together... Do you love Uncle Rhett anymore mother?" Ella was also listening and looking worriedly at her mother. Somehow Wade had grown up and he was no longer timid to ask his mother things. Taking a breath, Scarlett felt trapped.

"I-care for Uncle Rhett a great deal. Things change in life Wade Hampton and nothing stays the same. People grow a part and feelings develop and may not be the same as they were months or years ago. I didn't realize that, I thought in my own idealistic world life would go on the same... Don't worry though," she forced a bright smile. "Uncle Rhett and I are not quarreling and we haven't parted. We're perfectly fine and happy!"

The soft brown eyes looked uncertain, but Wade nodded and smiled. "Okay if you say so mother. I just want you and Uncle Rhett to be happy..."

"And we are!" Scarlett said with false brightness. "Well, I shall change and then come down for supper. Will you bring Georgia down and put her in her seat? Be careful though with her on the stairs." Those stairs, Scarlett remembered falling and loosing the baby and then sobbing on them as Rhett left her. They agreed and Scarlett left, her smile lightly diminishing as she thought about what Wade said and how she lied.

Her and Rhett weren't happy together. She was no longer miserable, but nor were they happy. Now, Rhett claimed to love her, only hours before and she had run like a coward. Yet she didn't want him to settle and already with time made herself withdraw from him. Her priories were now winning over the old guard, the children, her store and being a great lady. Entering her room she began to slip off the shoulders of her dress when she heard a voice.

"Hello," Rhett greeted, sitting in the corner and she spun around, heart hammering and saw him sitting in the corner. The dim lighting in her room had left him undetectable in the shadows.

"God's night gown! You almost scared me to death!" she swallowed, feeling her heart madly beating for two reasons: surprise and because of his earlier admission. "What are you doing here?" she softly asked.

"To be with you," he honestly stated. "That's often what a man will do when he declares his love to a woman, he wants to be in her presence even if she is no longer receptive to the idea. I wanted to be near you, Scarlett."

"I-" she closed her mouth. Felt overwhelmed. For the first time he was being brutally honest and she could see the sincerity in his eyes and the hesitance. Right now, she couldn't think too deeply on this, it was confuse her and she didn't need confusion in her perfectly sculpted life now. "Very well," she relented, "if you want to be near me, perhaps you could help me dress, unless it would be too much of a temptation for you not to keep your hands off of me," she added jokingly, taking comfort in moving from the gravety of the situation to a lightness.

"I shall mange, my pet though it may be exceedingly difficult given the fact I haven't had the pleasure of you in quite sometime," he lightly stated as he stood up and walked over to her and once again it struck Scarlett how attractive Rhett was and she felt feeling churn in her stomach, a fluttering sensation, which wasn't helped when he placed his hands on her shoulders and gently ordered for her to turn around. Her eyes dropped so they didn't meet his as she turned her back on him.

"Rhett?" she asked, her throat suddenly dry. "Is it true that you love me?"

"Yes, I told you it was. Why do you ask?" He held a hopeful look in his eyes.

"I know-but why now? Why when I became accustomed to the idea of not loving you that you deicide to throw it at me. Do you get some perverted pleasure at seeing me suffer and living a life of confusion? I don't believe you love me."

His hands stilled as her dress fell in a pool at her feet. As she knew her own soul, Scarlett could feel his eyes boring into her back and he let out a deep breath.

"I have never received a good pleasure in hurting you. I admit I was pleased to hurt you when I felt you hurt me by not loving me. Now, I don't want to hurt you anymore Scarlett. I have and still love you. It takes a lot admitting something what I so long denied, but I do love you my pet, truly know that I do care and love you and want this. That I do unquestioningly and willingly that is if you give me the chance."

"It's too sudden," she said, feeling distressed. "I can't deal with this now Rhett. We need to go down for supper. The children are waiting for us."

Another breath emerged from his lips. "Very well, I leave it up to you Scarlett. But you can't run away forever. The fact remains I meant every word I said and I am not letting you go again."

There was nothing Scarlett could say to him. The fact remained she could remind him that he had thrown her love back in her face or that she was set on not allowing Rhett into her heart again. Perhaps they were destined to always be at cross purposes, some part of her wanted to tentatively step forward and kiss him, just feel and recklessly give in, wondering how they would be different for one another, but those reckless days were over for her.

"I still don't believe you truly love me," she said, eyes meeting his squarely. "And I cannot give in now Rhett when my world is finally stable and I am happy. I can not deal with more disappointment or the world falling down around me again. Surely you understand as I understood your weariness. Let's have a truce for I will not accept anything else." She forced a smile. "Truce?"

Sighing, he nodded. "For now Scarlett, but I intend to show you my intentions are genuine and hope you believe me."

"Very well. Things may change Rhett to stay the same, but right now I am too busy to think about anything else save the children and the store. Of being a great lady, I hold those things most dear now and love... well love is a luxury that some don't posses, I don't need your love or acceptance anymore Rhett, just so you know..."

"Nevertheless I do love and accept you, Mrs. Butler." He stepped forward and grabbed her shoulders staring into her eyes. "I love you and I am here when you want me. To chase away your dreams and to give you help."

This Rhett was overwhelm,ing. The kind, caring Rhett Butler she rarely saw. Shaking her head, she smiled though. "Oh, Rhett I don't need help. I have chased away my own dreams and awoke plenty of times alone, no one to talk to or to hold me. As for love I have plenty from the children and acceptance by others. You'll get on," she wryly said, "there's plenty of warm beds are there not and plenty of women who would want you."

"But I don't want those women's beds. There's only one woman's bed I want to be invited into and that is yours my pet. Come, Scarlett give me a chance..."

"No. No. Last time we did not work and it nearly cost us everything. I have grown up to see things as they are and I will not risk the children or my peace of mind. Don't think you can cajole or force me to change my mind please. Let's just go down to supper and enjoy the children's company. Georgia will be happy to see you."

Both walked forward and Rhett let Scarlet exit her room first then followed her closely, coming to stand beside her. "She is very beautiful, my pet. But then again I always knew we'd make beautiful children. Tell me, one thing I am curious about?"

"And that is?" she asked, with a raised brow.

"Why did you name her Georgia Carolina? It is a very charming name, but different then Bonnie's, a lot more simple."

"Georgia for Tara. Pa once said the land ran through our veins and more than anything we are attached to the land we love and the Carolina was for you for I know you do love Charleston... Why don't you go for a visit to Eleanor and Rosemary? I am sure they would like to see you again."

"Trying to get rid of me?" he joked, looking mock hurt.

Rolling her eyes she laughed lightly. "Perhaps. I just think it might be good to give me time to think and time for us to have a part."

"If I wanted to be a part from you I would have divorced you when you asked. No, you're stuck with me for better or worse though I assure you it's for the better now. I shall only go to Charleston if you and the children go with me. I do need to show Georgia off after all. Atlanta doesn't get the only honor of seeing her and adoring her."

This caused Scarlett to smile happily and proudly. "I will think about it or we could invite them back here later." Their eyes met and Scarlett saw Rhett's dancing with genuine warmth, a warmth he rarely looked at her with and she couldn't look away for a second, until she forced herself to do so and entered the dining room with Rhett following behind.

The children were seated, Georgia in her chair and Scarlett felt more at ease, except for Rhett's eyes boring into her as she went to take a seat, reminding her of what eh suddenly had to offer and she wasn't certain if she wanted it now-not anymore after this year's pain. IN time she could decide, but she would think about it tomorrow...

XXX

Wade always liked Mr. Williams. He was an amusing, dryly sarcastic fellow that made him vaguely think about Uncle Rhett. Yet, he couldn't ignore Mr. William's interest in his mother and how Mr. Williams could have been the very cause of the rift he noticed between his mother and Rhett. The dwindling of the hot Georgian summer still made the class want to leave earlier and everyone was sitting on the edge of their seats, especially Ella who glanced at the clock and doodled on a piece of paper some nonsense of romance in Wade's opinion.

Yet Wade held another purpose and wouldn't be rushing out, his brown eyes flicked over to Mr. Williams who sat behind his desk, his head bent and occasionally rubbing his stubbled chin. A brief feeling of hesitance and timidity washed over Wade as the bell rang and Mr. Williams looked up, telling everyone to have a good day in his deep, thoughtful voice. Everyone rushed out, but Ella gave Wade a look.

"Aren't you coming Wade? Uncle Rhett is going to pick us up."

"I need to speak with Mr. Williams about... uh schoolwork, tell Rhett I am staying after."

The hazel eyes of his sister narrowed. "You're up to something."

"Just go Ella," Wade sighed. "I'll be home later and tell mother and Rhett that."

Luckily Ella decided to go out the door and Wade stood, slowly heading towards the front of the classroom. Mr. Williams looked up and looked surprised to still see someone in the classroom, there were a few more lines under the older man's blue eyes and he looked a little tired, yet still a glimmer of amusement danced in his eyes.

"Wade? Decided you loved being in class so much to stay after for extra work?"

"No... Mr. Williams I need to say something that is on my mind. I know how you feel about my mother. I know you have been with her a lot lately and..." Feeling more uncertain and timid, Wade took a breath to gather courage. "And I thought I should inform you that my mother loves her husband Rhett... and I think it would be best if you left her alone."

"Hmm," Mr. Williams murmured and nodded. "Well, Wade I do think you are a very bright young man and a good student however I think your mother's personal business is her own. I assure you her and I are good friends and your mother can make her own choices and I am not swaying her."

"I know you are my elder and my teacher. My mother cannot be swayed, but she isn't very happy I think and you coming into the picture just confuses things even more. I don't want her to be hurt or Rhett or Ella. There's all this gossip and if you don't stay away from my mother I'll be forced to tell Rhett-Mr. Butler."

The blue eyes registered surprise until he nodded and looked grave. "Very well Wade. You must do what you feel is right, but I am an adult and have the right to see your mother. I enjoy her company and will continue to visit her despite what gossip says, she is very dear to me-"

"You have no right making her dear to you!" Wade shouted. "I thought you were a gentleman Mr. Williams, I guess I was wrong. If you really cared for my mother you would want her to be happy and point her towards Rhett. He is her husband and her life is with him and us, not you. Well, I have to go. I'm sorry, but I had to say what was on my mind. Good-bye Mr. Williams."

Leaving quickly, Wade took a breath and felt anger still deep in his chest. Looked up and was surprised to see Uncle Rhett standing outside of the carriage, waiting.

"You waited?" Wade asked as he drew closer. "You didn't need to, Uncle Rhett."

"I know," Rhett smiled and winked playfully. "but I didn't think it would take long. How is Mr. Williams?" he casually asked, but Wade could sense the tension.

"Fine I suppose," Wade idly said and got into the carriage, Rhett following. The drive back was filled with Ella's chattering and Wade was very silent, staring putt he window. The carriage pulled up on Peachtree Street and soon pulled up to the mansion. Ella got out and rushed towards the door, but Rhett stopped Wade outside.

"Son may I speak with you?" he asked.

"Yes?"

"Something seems to be bothering you and remember I know you very well. I have known you since you were a baby. You can tell me if it would lessen your burden."

"I- that is I have been hearing things about Mr. Williams and mother." Wade quickly added, "I am sure none of it is true because mother loves you, but Mr. Williams has been spending a lot of time with her, Uncle Rhett and I don't like the way he looks at her."

Rhett's face didn't change but Rhett felt jealousy course through him and wondered f perhaps Scarlett was developing feelings for Mr. Williams, he didn't blame her since he had been so aloof and absent, but it didn't bode well with him because he wanted his wife to love him and go to him alone. He hadn't heard gossip, but he knew people wouldn't dare tell him. Then hie eyes flickered down and met Wade's who looked very nervous and Rhett put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Thank you for telling me Wade. I am not mad and everything will be fine."

As Wade left him, Rhett stood rooted to the spot as he thought about his next course of action and about Scarlett. As id by coincidence Scarlett's carriage pulled up and Rhett strolled over to the door just as she opened it, she looked surprised, but smiled cordially.

"Hello Rhett," she greeted as he offered his hand and she took it. "Waiting for me?"

"Hello, my pet, of course I would wait on you hand and foot if it would esteem me higher in your sight." He was glad to see her and gave her a small smile even as he wanted to punch Mr. Williams. "How was your day? Any good come of it. I know my day has became a lot brighter at seeing you."

"Why you are a smooth talker. You know, had you talked like this in the early days I might have fallen in love with you sooner," she joked, but didn't seem t care that he was now.

"Or you would have laughed in my face and held it against me and thought _the poor besotted fool. _Well, I picked up the children and was hoping you would want to take Georgia for a walk with me later?"

"That would be lovely Rhett," Scarlett agreed, looking interested. "Don't you have plans after supper though? You always do."

"Not tonight I am afraid," he joked. "I thought it would be nice and I always enjoy your company especially with Georgia. Is it a yes then or must I beg for your crumbs of affection?" he joked again, eyes rapt on her face and Scarlett noticed the old look like a cat watching a mouse and she suddenly realized what it was, Rhett was looking for love in her eyes. Her eyes dropped.

"Yes, Rhett. That would be fine and your company isn't that bad."

"Ah so you just put up with me?" he wistfully asked, sounding serious.

Her eyes met his. "No, not anymore. I do enjoy your company Rhett I am just not... well we haven't done much together so don't you agree it is sort of odd? It feels foreign."

"I agree, but nice. I realize how much I enjoy being with you, my pet and I aim that you likewise will seek me out in the future."

Once again he was being so brutally honest and Scarlett wryly wondered why it couldn't have been like this ages ago. Oh, well even though she wasn't certain if she wanted to allow him complelty back in she would allow him some leeway and didn't mind spending time with Rhett, a lot of time sit could be fun and since he wasn't being a cad or mean she looked forward to it.

"Only if you are on your best behavior," she quipped. "Well, shall we head inside?" She looped her arm though his and Rhett smiled down at her.

"Yes, indeed and perhaps you should change, I don't want people to think I am now taking walks with crows."

"Crows?" she frowned. "I may wear black, but I do not look like a crow Rhett. Crows are thin and are scrawny."

'you are thin, but not scrawny." His eyes swept across her with admiration. "And you have more curves since Georgia was born. I never told you this but after Bonnie was born I found you the most attractive and could barely keep my hands off of you. Your bosom was rather enlarged if I do say so-"

"Rhett!" she hissed and blushed. "Someone may hear you." But unlike the old Scarlett who would fly into rage she seemed amused and a little pleased.

"Then they will know!" Rhett announced in a loud voice in the lawn. "That Rhett Butler is madly in love with Scarlett Butler!"

She covered his mouth, but couldn't contain the laughter and laughed. Rhett joined in and swept a tendril of hair off her face. "I do love you," he whispered, "and I would say it a million times if you would believe it, Scarlett."

A gentle breath escaped her lips . "Well, after the millionth time we shall see if I believe you."

She left Rhett, heading inside. The door shut and Rhett felt a stirring of hope. They were speaking and she wasn't objecting to his company. This time tings would be right and he would see to that. Now, all he had to do, he darkly thought was confront Mr. Williams tomorrow and tell him to leave his wife the hell alone.

TBC


	59. Tired of It All

Note: Another long delay without posting another chapter. I am very sorry! Life can be so hectic and I have been running out of steam for this story. Thanks to Raicheal however and my own thoughts about DOT I have a solid idea in my head and this is going somewhere with a major thing happening in a few chapters. So please stick with me and review if this story still holds your interests. I am trying hard to Keep Scarlett in character so I hope I am doing justice. I talked my boyfriend into watching Gone with the Wind with me, he really seemed to like it and said it was a great movie, plus I bought the book to help. Hopefully it will give me the inspiration. Enjoy and please review.

Part 59

The black Butler carriage stopped in front of the William's residence and a finely tailored and tall Rhett Butler stepped out, sweeping his hat onto his head and his eyes flickering across the house in perusal. Soon he would face Rexton Williams and he welcomed this day. Yes, he was jealous. Insanely jealous, but able to look past that and know how much he loved Scarlett and wouldn't have this man steal her from him. Yes, Scarlett didn't want him right now, but he hoped in time she would. Her love for him couldn't have faded, just as his love for her hadn't faded although he'd swore it did. Scarlett was in his blood and he was wiling to do anything to keep her, even if it meant smashing Mr. Williams in the face for trifling with his wife. Using his walking cane, he pushed open the fence and strode towards the door, tapping with his stick as well.

The maid answered and gave him a cautious look, which Rhett noticed right away. He grinned charmingly.

"I am here to see Mr. Williams."

"Who may I say is calling?"

Rhett grinned wider. "Just tell him his conscious."

She looked at him as if he were crazy as he stepped over the threshold and she went walking off to what looked like a study. Dark eyes swept across the house and he was silent, wondering how it would go with Mr. Williams. He didn't seem like the type of fellow to fight, but one never knew when a man was told off and he intended to tell Rexton Williams off, among other things. When Rexton appeared, he seemed a little awkward as his eyes flickered to him and then away as he walked up.

"Hello Mr. Butler. Please come into my study. Is this a social visit or a visit of another nature?"

When they entered the study, Rhett said, "It is about Scarlett."

"Scarlett?" His eyes flickered to life and he looked anxious, afraid of him, but wanting to know about Scarlett. Rhett shook his head.

"You fool. Even if Scarlett wanted you, Mr. Williams she wouldn't cheat. She has broken many rules in the past, but her conscious wouldn't let her cheat and it would ruin her. I love her and intend to keep you away from my wife. Take this as a polite warning to stay the hell away from another man's wife, before you get more than a warning, from me."

Sighing, Rexton admitted quizzically, "Yes, I love her. Who wouldn't? But you, Mr. Butler turned her away and caused her much pain. Through it all she loved you and refused my polite advances. I wouldn't be surprised now though if she doesn't love you anymore. She loves her children, and society. She's a great lady, too good for you. When I kissed her-"

"You kissed her?" Rhett growled.

"Yes. She didn't want it. I will still visit her for there is noting or my conscious keeping me from it."

Rhett felt hot anger seize him. He imagined Rexton kissing Scarlett and felt his control slip as he took a step forward and before Rexton could react, punched him squarely in the face and Rexton fell back, hitting the wall and looked utterly dazed.

"You'll write Scarlett a letter," Rhett calmly said. "Informing her of your decisions to break all word with her. I wouldn't cross me, Mr. Williams. I have marks against my soul and have killed two men in my life, I have no qualms for adding a third mark, you hear?"

Rexton looked surprised, blood spurting a little from his nose and he nodded. "Very well. I hold affection for Scarlett, but is death worth it? I suppose not. Mark my words, Mr. Butler though, Scarlett is a fine woman and deserves everything. She is the kindest and most hard working woman I know and if she on her own accord chooses to see me, I won't stop that, but I assure you I won't seek her out on my own."

He headed to his desk to pull out stationary and Rhett breathed a silent sigh of relief. It would soon be over. Ashley and now Rexton would be out of the way and Rhett realized he could spoil and love Scarlett as he had always wanted to, but this time be on the level and be sincere, if she would let him in.

XXX

Scarlett was confused as to why Rexton hadn't written her back. Talk had spread like wild fire that the Butler carriage had been seen in front of Rexton's home. Scarlett knew, just knew Rhett had something to do with it. It made her... angry and vaguely amused that Rhett would go to such lengths when she told him she didn't want his meddling or love. A sarcastic Rhett, a meddling Rhett or detached Rhett she knew, not one who overlooked things and she nearly giggled as she realized Rhett had overlooked something such as this. Still, she was annoyed and knew she would confront him, just when she would she wasn't sure, but as soon as he walked in the door...

The familiar sound of the key latch opening echoed through the house and Scarlett gathered herself up off her chair and headed out of her room to the nursery. Wade and Ella were in school currently and Georgia down for her afternoon nap, Scarlett chuckled on her to make sure everything was well and saw Georgia sleeping as peacefully as could be. Bending over, Scarlett gave her a gentle kiss to her cheek and her lips curved into a wry smile as she sighed and went in search of Rhett. She didn't have to look far for he was in the downstairs study and got right up onto his feet when seeing her, giving her a genuine smile that nearly melted her resolve, for his eyes showed a genuine happiness at seeing her, something she had rarely seen.

"Hello, my pet," he warmly greeted.

She wasn't taking his bait. She paused and gave him a look then sighed. "Please, don't act happy to see me and spare all flattery and warmth, Rhett. I know just what you did and were butting yourself in my business..."

"What business are you talking about, Scarlett?"

"You know very well, Rhett. Mr. Williams. He hasn't returned my correspondence with him and well I, I just know how jealous you were of him and did something about it. I know for fact, for at the sewing circle I was at, Mrs. Merriweather informed me of our carriage being in front of his house the other week. You know what the funny thing is Rhett?"

"What? Dare I ask?"

She laughed, looking amused. "That you reinforced what people thought. Some assumed I had ran off to see Mr. Williams and thus it made you the laughingstock." She continued seriously, "And I have my reputation to think of Rhett. I am finally accepted and making it where Georgia is because I do love her, Rhett. Don't have the gall to lie to me, what I want to know is if you were there?"

"Hmm." Rhett stroked his mustache. "An apt observer Mrs. Merriweather is. How do I know it wasn't you gracing Mr. Williams with your presence?"

"Oh, get off that," Scarlett snapped. Took a deep breath. "I mustn't get angry," she told herself. "Rhett- he always plays the same game. Tells me he loves me, but thinks that lets him have a free card to mess around and do as he pleases. Ha! I finally have the upper-hand and by God, I am not losing it, as tiring as it is."

"Scarlett?" Rhett eyed her quizzically. "You okay, my pet? Please. Come now, I didn't mean to offend you." He took a step towards her and Scarlett was so enrapt in thought, she didn't realize he was so near to her until he placed gentle hand son her shoulders and light squeezed. Her head tilted and she met him square in the eye, feeling a little flustered and swallowed.

"Yes, it was me," he continued. "And yes before you speak, I am jealous and was insanely so. You know very well Mr. Williams is in love with you. I love you, Scarlett and you claim to not love me, but you are still my wife and I have much invested in you-"

"Yes, I know very well what you have invested in me, Rhett," Scarlett said turning her head to the side and taking a breath. Still, his hands were on her shoulders. "Money and for you to look good. It has never been about me, but I don't care anymore. The thing is, I want you to let me alone and remain at a distance. It will benefit me more and I could rage and scream at you for Mr. Williams, because that would accomplish nothing so I am going to ask you to quit meddling in my affairs. I shan't see Mr. Williams anymore, but not because of you it's because..." she trailed off.

"Because why Scarlett?"

"I can't stand men! The lot of them! Especially you, Rhett Butler, who claims to love me but acts like a jealous school boy. If Mr. Williams were a real man as well, he would have stood up to you, but he didn't. I used to admire men and think they were sensible, why they are just as petty as women. You and Mr. Williams can go to Halifax, but either way I don't care what you do. You were jealous over Ashley and yes, I do admit you had a reason, but you have no reason now Rhett. Only that your pride is stung. You needn't worry. I don't plan in falling in love again with you or another man anyways. I have better things to think about."

"Do you mean that Scarlett?" Rhett softy asked. "Surely you must care, even the slightest for me. You know I love you."

"Do I Rhett?" she bitterly asked. "I can't believe you love me for this reason and I am so tired of it all. So tired of everything. Can barely keep the store running and such when I do step in. Georgia too, needs me all the time- I can;t do this all Rhett and fight you, wondering what you're going to do next. Please, just leave me alone, I just want to be alone."

He let go of her and sighed. "Very well, I'll give you your peace and space, but I won't stay away forever Scarlett. I intend to have you again and for us to finally be on one page. God, if only it were so. I am tired too my pet of all these circles and loops around one another. Come, Scarlett..." He grabbed her shoulders again gently and she stared at him, resigned and tired. Softly finished, "It would be so easy to give in. Let yourself feel."

Then he lowered his head and kissed her. In her mind Scarlett felt something, but it was far away. It were as if she were a stranger and was outside of herself, watching Rhett and her kiss. She let that part of her take over and her resolve melted as she kissed and wanted to feel anything, even if this was only it, but it wasn't enough. No, she had denied it so long, but Scarlett realized not everything was fine, especially after Georgia was born. She loved her daughter, but something didn't feel right in the world and now she had a hard time getting out of bed. Gently, she pulled away and gave him a vacant look, before a little fire entered her eyes and she sighed, shaking her head, staring him in the eyes.

"No, Rhett. No more. I am so tired of everything. All your kisses, money, jealousy and determination to claim me again. I am not a pet and may be your life, but not your property. You can't cajole or swindle me with sweet words, Rhett Butler, not anymore you can't. I am so tired or it all and cant stand this another moment. Alas I am tried and retiring to take a nap. I shall see you for supper with the children. Good day."

Turning on her heel with grace and head held high she headed for her room, but each step seemed to draw strength form her.

"Scarlett!" Rhett called out, but she ignored it.

"Oh, I can't think of this now," she thought, "I'll go crazy and I am so tired, as if all the strength has left me. Where has it gone, really? Tara used to be my strength and my own will to fall back on. No, I don't even have Mammy here with me. That's it, I need to go to Tara and be away from Rhett for awhile. Have some time to think. I'll go in a few months after everything is settled and I start feeling a little better. Feel as weak an a newborn colt and can barely stand against Rhett. I resent him, resent that he loves me. Now, now when I finally numbed all hope of ever being with him."

Entering her room, she shut and locked her door, then tiredly trudged and sank onto the bed. It felt nice and she heard a knock on her door. It was Rhett.

"Will you please go away, Rhett?" she asked, loudly. "I need to rest."

"This isn't over Scarlett," he said through he door in a deep voice. "I love you."

She didn't say anything, merely closed her eyes and let sleep begin to claim her for a bit. Really, she should have her strength back now after Georgia's birth. It had been three months and with all her other children she had recovered so fast that Mammy had told her it wasn't fitting to have her be so healthy when all other women were weak and fragile, though she knew Mammy had been secretly proud.

"I'll call on Dr. Meade tomorrow," Scarlett thought, "and it will give me time to think and get out of the house. There is no way I would bring Dr. Meade here with Rhett around. He's been around so much, waiting for me to say I love him. Oh, Rhett I hate that it is so hard to resist you and that you are such a cad and make me insane and tired. Oh, I won't think about him now, I'll have to think about him tomorrow. I won't give in, I can't because Rhett and I are no good together and I realize I will become lost again and by God and all that is holy I shan't be used again by him."

TBC


	60. Come away with me

Note: Well, I realized it has nearly been a year since I updated. Well, more precisely 9 months. Running out of steam and busyness have all been factor. However I am taking a quarter off school to transfer thus I have some free time on my hands for the next month or so. I know this chapter was hurriedly rushed, but I have everything planned out now unto the end of Dream of Triumph. Please enjoy and review! All my readers still mean a lot to me.

Chapter 60

Rhett felt anxious as he entered the mansion and Dr. Meade passed him, giving a mere tip of his hat without any explanation why he visited. Then his dark eyes swept across Scarlett's form as she quietly walked down the steps. She gave him a light, tentative smile as she stepped down the last step and he took her hand and kissed it.

"Are you ill?" he worriedly asked.

"No, Rhett…" He saw her swallow and tears fill her eyes.

"Scarlett," Rhett quickly and gently grabbed her shoulders. "My pet, surely it cannot be that bad?"

"No," she sniffled as he offered her his handkerchief. "I just have not been feeling well is all. Dr. Meade says sometimes it is common for women to feel slight melancholy after they give birth, but I have always recovered so quickly and now…"

"Now what?"

"I feel there is no reason to go on. I no longer have the mills; Ashley is taken care of for Melly. You're back here for the children. There seems to be nothing left for me sometimes, Rhett," she desperately added, feeling her age and everything had come to a stand still and it depressed her.

Rhett clucked his tongue in his cheek. "Nothing left to live for? Scarlett, you have everything offered to you. You can finally settle down and quit fighting. Tara is grander than ever. The store is doing well, the children are happy and you always have me, even though you don't want me. I have made my feelings quite clear and have been quite faithful."

"Now you are faithful," she bitterly said, glaring at him. "As if you are the virtue of the perfect husband."

"Where is that coming from?" Rhett demanded, looking a little hurt.

"Never mind." She tried to turn away but Rhett firmly caught her shoulder.

"No, none of that Scarlett. We have promised to be truthful with each other. Where is this bitterness coming from? I have tried to please you; to be kind but a man only has so much patience. Pray tell me how to win your affections for I am trying my damndest and bending over backwards for even a smile from you!"

Scarlett sucked in a breath and bit her lip, feeling a little guilty. Rhett was right of course; she had not been the easiest. What had happened? Why did she feel like she no longer needed Rhett? Indeed she felt despondent about everything. As if the life were sucked out of her and everything felt dull and lifeless. Her lashes fluttered down, hiding her expression from his alert eyes.

"I am sorry, Rhett," she admitted and her eyes met his as she stepped forward and earnestly stared him in the eyes. She placed her hand on his and she felt his hand move under hers and his other hand cupped over hers. "I am just tired of everything. There is no excitement, nothing to fight for or have. I feel like a caged animal and as boring as Aunt Pitty or Mrs. Merriweather. All I do is go to the store, sew and charity. I enjoy it, I do but there is only so much I can do!"

Throwing back his head, Rhett chuckled. "That is the old Scarlett I know and love. All you need do is tell me that," he tenderly added, walking over to her and cupping her face in his hands. "And I would relieve you. I know you have refused my offer to whisk you away to Mexico or Paris but you shan't deny me any longer honey. Come away with me Scarlett. I want a second honeymoon… so I could persuade you to love me again, with the most wicked way imaginable…"

She blushed but grinned saucily. "We'll see about that… but what about the children, Rhett?"

"They can stay with mother and Rosemary. They haven't seen Georgia since she was born. Give us this chance Scarlett and let yourself be a free spirit again, that is one of the things I admire most about you is how wild and untamable you are. You're a lot of woman."

"Oh, Rhett Butler…" Scarlett beamed and smiled coyly, "you are not so bad looking yourself or charming."

"Is that an actual compliment, Scarlett Butler?" Rhett asked, lips curving.

As she stared up at him, smiling, Scarlett's heart caught. His dark eyes took up her world. She thought back to a few days ago swearing she would not feel love. Yet she felt something deeper than mere fondness for this man she had known 14 years. Rhett. Her heart began to beat a little more madly, she berated herself, wanted to fight it yet she did not for once and reached up and cupped his cheek in her hands.

The dark orbs got that look. That cat look where he was searching for something and before he could fully think Scarlett kissed him. Kissed him as she wanted to and had for ages, before she tried to shut her heart off and keep it at bay from Rhett.

"Rhett," she broke away, breathlessly, her eyes serious. "I have something to tell you-"

Lou nearing interrupted them. After all Scarlett realized with surprise she had forgotten they were in the middle of the foyer and not at all truly alone.

"What is it Lou?" Rhett asked, hi voice husky and caused a shiver to make it's way through Scarlett's spine. Her entire body felt on fire and had a mind of it's own, as she stared at him too long, she blushed.

"A telegram for Miz Scarlett, Mistah Rhett."

Scarlett took the offered letter. A telegram, which was a lot quicker than a letter but Will often sent a telegram with a short missive because he did not like writing long and wasn't very literate. She would read it later and didn't bother to glance at it.

"What did you have to say to me, Scarlett?" Rhett asked.

Scarlett idly glanced down at the telegram, preoccupied. As she read the urgent telegram, the color drained from her face.

"Scarlett?" Rhett urgently called.

For some reason Scarlett could barely hear him. She dropped the telegram and it fluttered to the floor.

"No…" a broken moan emerged from her lips.

She backed away from Rhett.

"Scarlett?" He quickly gripped her shoulders and bent down so his eyes were level with hers. "Sweetheart?"

She felt the bile rise in her throat and Scarlett couldn't stop it. Wrenched herself out of Rhett's grip and retched on the precious carpet, shoulders heaving as her breath came in short and quick gasps.

"M-my stays," she gasped. "I can't breathe…"

Rhett quickly went down on the floor beside her and undid her stays as Scarlett had sank all the way to the floor and he moved her face and hair so she wasn't near her own vomit. He felt fear, unlike anything else as he stared at his wife's pale face and then he grabbed the telegram and read it.

"Oh, Scarlett. My pet…"

Mammy was sick and dying. Will begged them to go to Tara as soon as possible for it was all likely Mammy would not be on this earth in a few days time. Fiercely he held her as Scarlett clung to him, she didn't cry surprisingly but was trembling.

"Lou!" Rhett yelled, not moving. Lou hurriedly dashed into the room a moment later and took in the scene.

"I need you to pack Miss Scarlett and my bags. We're going to Tara. Mammy is gravely ill."

Lou looked saddened and uncertain as she stared at the broken form of Scarlett huddling in Rhett's arms. "Yes, Mistha Rhett. And I will… clean up the mess sir."

She quickly departed and Rhett rocked Scarlett in his arms.

"It will be alright, my pet," he murmured, hoping it was true. He kissed her forehead gently and stared into her watery, vacant eyes.

"Mammy…"

"I know," Rhett murmured. He loved Mammy as well and closed his eyes, whishing they could return to their happiness earlier. It seemed they were happy for a few precious moments than destruction would hit. How much more could Scarlett take before she would break? Suddenly he, strong and mighty Rhett Butler felt scared to death and anxiously watched Scarlett and picked her up in his arms, beginning the walk to her room.

TBC


	61. An end of an era

Note: Thank you so much for the reviews! All of you are awesome and so kind to give me encouragement. Each review made me very happy and realized I missed writing Dream of Triumph. Well, it would seem I am in "writing mode again" and got some steam and passion back for the story. The chapters are just getting punched out now and here is the next part. Please enjoy and review!

Part 61

The children were with them. Ella and Wade loved Mammy as much as Scarlett had as a little girl. Though it would have been easier not to bring the children and have to comfort them, Scarlett knew they should be at Tara with Rhett and her. Shock coursed through Scarlett, she felt like weeping and raging. How much loss must one have? Had she not paid well for her sins? Perhaps she had been wrong and she was meant to be crushed and lose everyone she held dear.

"Scarlett," Rhett whispered, placing his hand on her cold one. She looked over at him in the carriage beside her. "You're cold."

Nodding, not saying a word she watched him remove his jacket and place it over her shoulders.

"Rhett…" Scarlett began, but trailed off and sighed.

"What is it?" he asked.

The courage left her and she berated herself. Her world was falling a part. Surely it was. Soon they would be at Tara and she would see Mammy. See the old, black and wrinkled face, the old hands and know death loomed there. This was too much. Once, she felt hope she could face and do anything. She could save Tara, and she did. She could win Ashley's love and she lost that. To find she never wanted that, she wanted Rhett. Rhett abandoned her and then she thought she could weather it and make him love her. Now, he claimed he did but therein laid a hollow victory.

The very thing Scarlett wished to tell Rhett was she wanted to be free. Marriage constricted her now; everything seemed to threaten to sink her. Eyes filling with tears, she took a shuddering breath and held it in, leaned forward and pulled Georgia into her lap.

"Mama?" the small girl asked, dark eyes wide. "I am scared."

"Don't be baby," Scarlett said, burying her face in her daughters soft curls. "All will be well," she lied, making her face serene. Wishing to offer a prayer to God, wondering if He would listen to her as he had listened to her mother.

"Mother?" Ella tearfully asked, lip trembling. "Will I get to say bye to Mammy?"

Luckily Rhett answered for her. "We hope so Ella. We're getting there as fast as we can."

Wade didn't say a word; he merely stared out the window, a lot like Charles. Kind, more outspoken though. At his age, Wade wanted to take his pain like a man, as he was getting older. He was thirteen years old and soon he would be an adult and in the University in four years.

"I wish I were dead," Scarlett glumly thought. "Another death and funeral to sit through. Have to listen to everyone say how sorry he or she is when they know nothing of suffering. I used to be so bitter, perhaps I still am, but now I see this is hell: Pa, mother, Bonnie, my baby, Suellen, the boys in the county and Melly. I needed them so. Now Mammy…"

XXX

As soon as they arrived at Tara and saw the large, white plantation loom proudly in sight, Rhett kept a close eye on Scarlett. He wanted to be there for her. To soothe her fears and help her through this. By God, he knew how much Mammy meant to her, in so many ways Mammy was like Scarlett's mother now and the last link to the old days. Though Scarlett's face appeared calm he saw her green eyes were cloudy and turbulent as they stared back at his.

He took her hand in his and kissed it once the family exited the carriage. He stopped down, picked up Georgia to rest against his left side while he continued to hold Scarlett's hand, until her hand slipped out of his and he watched her shoulders square and her chin tilted up.

The classic Scarlett pose of strength. He admired her strength and courage. Admired and loved everything about her. Yet she wasn't reaching out to him. He offered her himself and she denied him and the happiness that could be hers. This time, he didn't feel self assured or confident. No longer the same care free blockade-runner. Hadn't been for some time. After Bonnie left and this 14-year race and war with Scarlett. He weathered this storm though; in hopes she would forgive him and love him again. She seemed determined not to though.

Now, Mammy was dying. He felt a pang. He loved Mammy for Mammy's no nonsense attitude. How she had always been there for Scarlett and Bonnie when Bonnie was alive. Entering the house, Will stood there, looking grim and sad.

"Hello Rhett," he greeted then looked to Scarlett and gave her an awkward squeeze to her shoulder. "Scarlett… I am glad to see ya, even under these circumstances. Tara has missed ya."

"Well, events seem to call me back that are not in my control," Scarlett bitterly voiced and then her eyes swept across the foyer. Her girlhood was spent here, full of hopes and dreams. She felt resentful and so afraid. Wishing she could still be that young carefree girl. Knowing however she told herself she would not look to the past and hope for things that could never be. "I must see Mammy," she softly murmured and could not look Will in the eyes, for if she did Scarlett feared she would cry.

Swallowing, she told herself she would remain in control. For her and the children's sakes. For Mammy's sake. Mammy must not worry about her. Will nodded and she followed him. Ever conscious Rhett was following behind her as well as they ascended the stairs and walked to the spare room.

Will opened the door and Scarlett stepped inside to see Mammy's form lying on the bed. Mammy had always been round and plump, now she appeared so much thinner and her face unmoving, more lines and wrinkles of age and hardship on her mammy's face.

"Mammy," Scarlett softly said.

The old eyes opened. "Mah lamb?"

"Yes, Mammy," Scarlett whispered and kneeled besides Mammy's bed, taking her hand in hers and gave it a light kiss, face earnest and saddened. She felt the tears well in her eyes and held them back. "I came to see you… I missed you so. When you are better," she brightly added, "we can have it be like old times, wouldn't that be nice Mammy?"

"Miss Scarlett ya were always de worst liar dat Mammy done ever seen." Some old fire entered Mammy's eyes. "I know soon I shall meet the good Lord and dat doan bother dis old woman one bit. I's only want ya to be happy mah lamb and Mammy can go in peace."

"I am happy, Mammy," Scarlett lied, closing her eyes. "Rhett is here with me and we brought the children…" Ella and Wade answered on cue, Ella crying of course and Wade looking stoic and brave. Scarlett turned away from the scene briefly and could not hear or make out what was being said past the pounding in her ears.

Ella and Wade were ushered out. Scarlett didn't realize it, until Mammy spoke again. "Mah lamb, I wan ya to know ya have been more special to me than anyone else. I am proud of ya Miss Scarlett and see how much ya hab blossomed to look like yer sweet mother. Miss Ellen would be might proud."

Finally, Scarlett lost her composure and her face crumbled. "Oh, Mammy!" she cried, "I can't live without you. I need you so and I am so selfish, I know how I can be, but please Mammy don't leave me like everyone else has."

"Mammy is ole now Miss Scarlett," the woman said. "Now I must go and yer strong. Mah lamb has de fight. I want ya to do somethin' for me. Before I go to be wid de Lord, I want ya to patch up things with Mistha Rhett. I ain't no fool Miss Scarlett and know dat man loves ya and ya two could be happy."

"Mammy, we can't-" Scarlett protested, "there's been too much hurt between Mistah Rhett and me, there's-"

Mammy held up a hand slowly. "No, Miss Scarlett. I know ya both are stubborn. Jus' as stubborn as mules in horses harnesses. It be about time ya two made peace and learned to quit scratching at each other like cats."

Why did Melly and Mammy have their dying wishes about her and Rhett? Scarlett felt it was wasted breath and she shook her head, wishing to protest then Mammy stared at her.

"Miss Scarlett, pride is no good. Pride made yer grandpapa never see Miss Ellen again. Pride made Mistha Gerald jump when we try with all our might to stop him. Ya must give up yer pride and learn to live."

"I'd do anything for you Mammy, anything," Scarlett fiercely said, "and if you want me to make things right with Mistha Rhett and be amiable… I will. I loved him Mammy, I waited so long for him to love me, but I have changed and whatever I do, I'll do it for me, Mammy and not because I care what people think. I love you so, dearest Mammy."

She gave Mammy a kiss to her weathered cheek and felt the other tears threatening to fall but Scarlett gulped them back and moved away from Mammy. Smoothed her hand over her black dress. Then she realized she had yet to tell Mammy what she had found out from Dr. Meade and quickly turned towards her bedside, trying to be discreet. Crouched near her and whispered, "Mammy, I am going to have a baby."

Mammy beamed. "Mistha Rhett will be mighty proud and happy. He say he doan want a boy but I doan believe that. Not one bit."

"I haven't told him yet though," Scarlett admitted. "Please don't tell him."

"This old woman's lips are sealed and she'll take them to the grave," Mammy promised. "I love mah lamb."

Scarlett faintly smiled, but her eyes were agonized in her pale face. "I love you, Mammy," she whispered. Turned and left, she motioned for Rhett and he walked up to her, afce concerned.

"I said good-bye," Scarlett said with difficulty. "Mammy wants to see you now, Rhett."

"Very well," Rhett gave Scarlett a tender kiss to her cheek. Her eyes fell closed as she took momentarily comfort from his kiss. She wanted to kiss this man, fall inot his arms and weep. Yet Mammy was right, pride kept her from doing all these things, even telling him that they were to have another baby. She had been about to tell him, always waiting for the right moment. Wanting to withhold it for she felt uncertain if she wanted this baby or not. A part of her did, the other part was afraid of what it would mean. Her true feelings for Rhett.

Staying by the door, Scarlett listened to Rhett speak to Mammy in his deep, soothing voice. They joked about her petticoat, the red one Rhett had bought her while Rhett and her were on their honeymoon in New Orleans and she spent tons of money on trinkets. Gifts to make everyone pea green with envy that she had tons of money now.

Rhett stared at the wizened face; from the war he knew what death looked like. Mammy was close to leaving this life. Her breathing was becoming more shallow as she stared up at him.

"Mistha Rhett, I was mighty mad fer ya leavin' Miss Scarlett," she rasped, "ya must promise me you'll never leave her and always be a gempum."

"I swear this to you," Rhett gently replied. "I love Scarlett, Mammy and I intend to stay with her through hell or high water."

Mammy weakly nodded. "Yer a fine gempum Mistha Rhett. A mighty fine one…"

That was Mammy's last words as she breathed her last breath and it slowly expelled from her body. Frowning, Rhett moved forward and looked grief stricken, he had been too much of a coward to be at Miss Melly's bedside and he leaned forward.

"God rest her soul," he chocked briefly and sighed, moving over to gently close her eyelids with his hands. Then he looked at Scarlett and saw her face crumple, break as if she were a piece of glass and had just shattered, she turned on her heel and ran as if something were after her.

"Scarlett!" He moved after her, wanting to comfort her and firmly pull her against his chest, but she had already ran down the stairs, the train of her mourning gown following her quickly.

Will stropped him though. "I don't mean to tell ya what to do, Rhett but she needs time. Everyone needs to mourn in their own way and sometimes alone."

Rhett knew Will was right. As much as he wanted to wipe away her pain and make her happy again. His shoulders slumped as he sighed and glanced back to the room with the lifeless body of Mammy.

XXX

Ten minutes later Rhett came upon the sight of Scarlett crouching near the headstone of her father and mother. Her shoulders were heaving and he was afraod for her, he quickly jogged over to her, she gave no indication of having noticed him. When she looked up at him, he stopped dead in his tracks and stood motionless.

Her green eyes were vacant and dull. Face tear streaked with the red earth from her tears. "She's gone," Scarlett murmured. "Gone, Rhett." The voice spoke simply, as if the weather and Rhett crouched down besides her, not caring if he dirtied his trousers.

"Yes, my pet." He stared at the headstones as he heard her bitter laugh ring.

"Another plot to line here in Tara. How appropriate don't you think? It's only setting for when I will be buried here, an old, lonely and miserable woman whom everyone hated. Melly and Bonnie aren't here, but everyone else is and someday I'll be here too."

"Scarlett," he gently said, "you have a lot of life in you yet. I love you and won't let anything happen to you…"

Quickly standing up, Scarlett nearly fell over, but his hand caught her.

"Protect me?" she incredulously asked. "Not hurt me? You hurt me, Rhett! I gave you my heart and you spat on it, just to be cruel and give me a taste of my own medicine. Where were you when everyone made fun of me, when I was so very alone?"

"I want to make that up to you, if you would let me I would make you happy. We're meant to be together Scarlett. It's destiny, fate, whatever you call it, but it is us and I want to take care of you, darling."

"No," she simply said, the fire leaving her. "No." Shaking her head sadly. Rhett desperately tried to take her in his arms but she pushed his chest hard and he stumbled back in surprise. "What is broke cannot be mended, isn't that what you once said? We're broken, I am broken. We're a lost cause." She began to laugh hysterically.

He quickly stepped towards her, "Scarlett," he whispered. "I am sorry." Tried to take her in his arms and she fought.

"No! Let me go! Let me go, Rhett Butler!" she screamed hysterically. "You think your soothing words and lies will fix this, will soften me and make me your doormat."

"No, I-"

"You never deserved me," she cried out, angry tears coursing down her cheeks and a sob emerging from her lips, the tears mingling with the red dust.

"Excuse me?" he felt he had been slapped.

TBC


	62. I will not run

Note: Thanks so much for the reviews! Thank you ScarlettLovesRhett, BlaqueCat13, CaptScarlett, Merovia, Villains R HOT and Sonomi-chan. Also another thanks to Pureblood-Slytherins who pointed out a GWTW video on Youtube called Shattered reminded them of my story, and after watching it I had to agree. I usually don't add song lyrics to my chapter, but I liked them a lot. The song is called Shattered by Trading Yesterday. Also so clarify it is November of 1875. Georgia is a year and a few months old. Please enjoy!

"**And I've lost who I am, and I can't understand. **

**Why my heart is so broken, rejecting your love, without, love gone wrong, lifeless words carry on. **

**But I know, all I know, is that the end's beginning. **

**Who I am from the start, take me home to my heart. **

**Let me go and I will run, I will not be silent. **

**All this time spent in vain, wasted years, wasted gain. **

**All is lost, hope remains, and this war's not over. **

**There's a light, there's the sun, taking all shattered ones. **

**To the place we belong, and his love will conquer all."**

Part 62

She smiled, a sick smile. "You don't deserve my love. I am better than that Rhett and better than your games…"

"What are you saying?"

"Everything is over, don't you see? It's like the war and we lost. We gambled and lost, but you were the one who sunk us and we could have been so very happy. You wouldn't let us. You change your mind, all the time. At least when I loved Ashley, I loved him for years. I wasn't fickle like you. Now, you are a liar and I once looked at myself and asked, "what is wrong with me, that Rhett can't love or want me?" When I loved you so much. God's nightgown, I loved you and would have shown it. Now, I see I was not the problem, it was you all along and I blamed myself. I blamed myself, Rhett! Now Mammy is gone, my last link to happiness and childhood. Do not think about trying to love me or save me. Save us dignity as you once said, spare us this last, right?"

"Scarlett," Rhett began, but she cut him off.

"I do not want to hear it," her eyes blazed with tears. "I cannot think anymore except about Mammy…"

"No," he said, "you have said your peace, let me say mine." Rhett searched his mind desperately, realizing they had made so much headway and now she had completely turned away.

"It doesn't matter," moaned Scarlett. "Please, let me be Rhett. It's too late. Everything is too late…"

"No," Rhett broke in.

"Yes!" she fiercely cried, "I thought… I thought once we had a chance. A good fighting chance, and now… now I find there is too much bad between us, Rhett…"

"Shut up!" Rhett fiercely whispered, "I threw our happiness away with two hands when I said you were. I was a damn hypocrite, but this time Scarlett I won't let you walk away from me, do you hear me?"

"It's too late, Rhett," she defiantly retorted, chin tilting up and eyes flashing fire, with tears streaming down her face. "I may not walk away from your physically but my heart left you long ago."

"Are you tying to be cruel?" he quietly asked.

"Not cruel, no Rhett, just honest."

Then he put his arms around her and kissed her forehead, grabbing her chin to have her eyes face his. "I love you, Scarlett and I shall never stop. That is the honest truth. I shall wait for you and help you through this, my pet. Mammy was a great lady and this time I shan't run. Just tell me you don't hate me."

Her mouth opened then closed. She shook her head and let out a shuddering sigh, closing her eyes for a moment before they opened and their eyes met. "No and therein lies the problem. I could never hate you Rhett, but I am not certain I can love you. This is why we are here today in this mess and I do not know how to get out of it, except…"

"Except what?"

"If I didn't feel," she tearfully added, the tears beginning again and smudging the dirt on her cheeks. Rhett reached in his pocket and pulled her against him, wiping the red dirt from her cheeks and tears. Pulling her closer, he laid her head against his chest and she held him, tightly with her arms, her breaths heaving until she pulled away.

"I shall make arrangements for the funeral and in a few days time after it," Scarlett began in a business-like tone, "we can head home with the children."

Then she turned and left him again. Rhett looked around the surrounding area and felt the wind blow in earnest, watched it move Scarlett's dark train of her gown and she seemed like such a small figure compared to the earth and the huge plantation. Mammy. His find went to her last words and he sighed. The reality had yet to set in.

Hope was gone from Scarlett's eyes. A frightening reality took hold of him. Suddenly he knew he had one more chance, one more chance to patch things up with Scarlett and save her, or else all would be lost.

XXX

The dark mansion was unbearable for Scarlett. Everything was done with. The dead buried, she bitterly thought and she was carrying Rhett's child. Although they had been back in Atlanta for two weeks now, Scarlett had not worked up the nerve or desire to tell him. Soon she would be forced to for she could not hide her secret for long.

Georgia was a little over a year old now, Scarlett couldn't believe it and how much time passed so quickly. Looking back, Scarlett also knew when the baby had been conceived, it was Georgia's birthday. It had been such a nice day and despite Scarlett telling Rhett she didn't love him and spurning him, that day he had been so happy and loving with Georgia, Scarlett had felt her heart soften towards Rhett again…

"_What a night!" Rhett grinned as he neared Scarlett. The children were now fast asleep and Scarlett and Rhett were cleaning up the mess in the foyer from the large birthday party. Everyone had been invited: The Elsings, Merriweather's, Meade's and everyone in Atlanta. _

"_It was a pretty good party if I do say so myself," Scarlett smugly smiled, proud of the work she had done. She always thrived on social functions and usually did good ones. It was nice once again to be in good standing and have approval. _

_Then Rhett warmly put his hands on her shoulders and looked down at her, his dark eyes warm in his swarthy face. A feeling settled over Scarlett. It was like when she first met him: the young, vibrant and joking Rhett Butler. Still trim, as handsome as sin and the Rhett she had loved yet she had been such a fool to realize why her blood had warmed and heart raced when near him. His touch was like electricity and their eyes clashed._

_Warmth spread through Scarlett's stomach and she smiled up at him, eyes dancing with amusement._

_He sucked in a breath and Scarlett could tell she affected him. "What is it?" he asked._

"_What ever so you mean?" she lied._

_Quirking a brow, he laughed as well. "You are the worst liar. Come now, you can tell me, I am your husband after all."_

"_That eases my mind," she retorted, rolling her eyes. "Truly, it is nothing, Rhett. I was only thinking of how much fun Georgia's party was, is all and how beautiful she is becoming. All the men shall court her."_

"_She will be like her mother," Rhett agreed._

"_But hopefully not as intemperate as I," Scarlett said in honesty and laughed lightly. "I want so much for her Rhett," she passionately added. "I want to give her all that I could never give Bonnie."_

_A flicker of pain crossed Rhett's face. "Bonnie loved you, Scarlett," he seriously said._

"_No, she didn't. She loved you, Rhett. It's like when I was a little girl and with pa. No one could get in-between pa and I. I still miss him, you know." She smiled bravely and Rhett touched her hand, a jolt went through her body and Scarlett sucked a breath._

"_What do you want to do, Scarlett?" Rhett silkily asked._

_Scarlett blinked. "What do you mean?"_

"_I see something in your eyes. Tell me, what do you want?"_

_Mind racing, Scarlett felt the words come to her lips. Rhett. She wanted Rhett. It had been so long. Almost two years since they made love. How had she refused his touch and denied themselves? Pulse hammering, Scarlett felt weak at the knees but her courage and desire fueled her to step lightly forward and frame his cheeks in her hands and stare deeply into his eyes._

"_I want to kiss you," she whispered tantalizingly._

"_Then, what?" he huskily asked._

"_Then I want you to take me to my room and make love to me Rhett. I don't care what you think of me or that you want declarations. I am sorry, I cannot say much. I only know that I want to be yours tonight, Rhett Butler and I shall think about the rest tomorrow. Do you want me?" she candidly asked, face flaming._

"_What a question," Rhett gruffly said, "you know that I always want you. My feelings for you are pretty clear. Need I go outside your window and serenade you to wiggle my way into your heart?" _

"_You are already in my heart."_

"_Am I?" he slowly asked, eyes flickering. "Then why can't you let yourself love me, Scarlett?"_

_She thought of a reply but her courage was fading. Instead of answering, she brought his lips hard against hers. They didn't need to talk; she only wanted to feel him. Hand running up and down his back, clutching his back and shirt with her fingers, Scarlett felt her mind begin to spin as his warm lips moved down to her throat and he sucked and kissed her skin. Moaning, Scarlett looked up at him hazily._

"_My room?" she breathlessly asked._

_He chuckled softly. "Who am I to refuse such a beautiful woman as you? I want you, Scarlett," he added and kissed her lips hard, causing her to shiver with excitement and her breathing to heighten considerably. "More than any other woman. You mean more to me than anyone else in the world, do you understand that?" Kissing her again, Scarlett didn't have the ability to speak, she merely nodded._

_Both, hand in hand slowly walked up the grand staircase towards Scarlett's room. As soon as the door shut behind them, they hurriedly found each other and moved towards the bed, clothing falling along the way. _

"_So sweet," Rhett whispered against her lips. "I love you."_

That night, out of that passion and Scarlett's momentary abandon she conceived. Not sure how to feel about it now, with her world falling apart. Scarlett bit her lip, not wanting to cry. The brandy decanter across the way called out to her and she craved the liquid to warm her bones. The baby… Scarlett knew it was wrong for her to be thinking this way, not to tell Rhett, to shut herself away this cold night and drink, but she didn't care. Nothing mattered anymore.

She poured and gulped down the liquid desperately, the wind howled outside. Hit the windows and she jumped slightly, greedily drinking. Thought of Mammy and felt like sobbing. The gaslights flickered and she felt so alone. Where were Mammy, mother, Melly and all those women who had coddled her and comforted her? Yes, she was a woman, should be strong and take care of herself but she was so weary of taking care of herself and sanding on her own. Was there no one she could confide in? Oh, she felt she was going crazy sitting here alone with her thoughts.

Eyes darting across the quiet room, she debated about going over to the room adjoining hers. Rhett was in there. Sometimes they shared a bed still for appearances sake, but Scarlett decided she preferred sleeping alone so she could keep her resolve and not meld to Rhett or give into him. 

But when the knock sounded on her door, Scarlett knew it was him. Fear, annoyance and such a wide range of emotions took hold of her. She slightly staggered when she walked to answer the door, not realizing she had drank so much.

Rhett' stared at her. His dark eyes concerned and pointed as they swept across her.

"Scarlett, may I come in?"

Bracing herself, she nodded. She wanted to throw him out and rail at him, but she felt him move past her into her darkened room. Then with panic, she realized she had not thought to hide the decanter and it sat on her desk, exposed and through weary eyes, Scarlett blinked and watched him pick up the glass and eye the contents, he set it down and sighed.

"Scarlett, I am worried about you since the funeral, I think it's time we talked."

TBC


	63. Scarlett decides to gamble

Note: Thank you to all who reviewed. You all are so thoughtful and encouraging to me. Well, yes I finally have the rest of Dream of Triumph's plot in my mind and the storyline will go on for a period of about 8 months then it will be over. It is so hard to believe… after having been working on this story for 3.5 years. Anyways please enjoy!

Part 63

"What is there to talk about?" Scarlett asked, a defensive tone coming to her voice. She knew what he wanted, to pry more and try to make her open up. She simply had no desire to.

Rhett sat down and sighed. "Scarlett, I love you. I have made that fact quite clear, but I am also not blind to what you are doing. Damnit Scarlett, why won't you let me in? I would help you if you let me."

"You can't help me!" she cried. "No one can help me!"

"Why not? My pet, life can't be as bad as all that. Mammy is gone yes, and all of us mourn- you more so because she was like a second mother to you and the link to the good old days, but Scarlett, I am here. You have a husband who loves you, children who look up to you. You are a great lady now, you have all of Atlanta at your feet."

"A little too late," she bitterly said, green eyes harsh. "Now when everyone is gone, I have what I always wanted! When it doesn't matter anymore. Haven't you heard of a little too late?"

"What must I say Scarlett?" Rhett groaned. "I have tried everything."

Fire sparked in her eyes. She wanted to run far from Rhett. Why did he act like he was the saint and she had something wrong with her? He had a hard life, yes, but he acted as if her pain was nothing. She should just be happy and fall on a bended knee, thanking him for his love.

"Oh, now you want recognition? You always played the perfect husband and now that you claim to love me you expect me to be grateful? You act as if you were the martyr and saint! As if I owe you something and I owe you nothing Rhett." Sadness suddenly filled her and her throat and heart felt constricted. "Nothing," she finished in a whisper.

"Let me hold you, my pet," he told her and she tried to push him away as he put his arms around her. For a moment she let herself be held, felt intoxicated, as if the world was spinning and she had lost her inhibitions. Then she looked at his earnest face, desired him and felt she despised him at the same time.

"Scarlett," Rhett said, deeply. "let me love you. Quit fighting me and this…"

Here he was before her. She was tired of his promises. Scarlett wondered if she could ever feel again. A cold feeling held her: anger, hysteria, depression weighed her down. Simply she wanted to be let alone and Rhett wouldn't leave her alone. A part of her wished to punish him, for acting so perfect. It would have been preferable right then if he hated her and left her alone. Felt he never had understood her and pretended he did.

Then she dragged his face down to hers and kissed him violently. The alcohol swirled in her mind and she wanted to be the one in control over him. Hurt him as he hurt her by his invasion in her life, the feeling that nothing would ever be right in the world again. It was only when his hands came upon her shoulders and he pushed her roughly away, hand flying to his lip, she realized her folly. Scarlett's eyes widened.

"You cold hearted bitch," he murmured, eyes flickered with pain then anger. She saw blood on his lip and was horrified. Paled and stepped back as he advanced towards her. Shaking, Scarlett realized she deserved to be hit and wondered if he would strike her, she deserved it.

"Rhett," she gasped, "Rhett, I don't know-"

"Shut up," he whispered violently, "I loved you Scarlett. I offered my help and love, openly this time and you revile me. It was different when you didn't think I loved you, but now that you know… I would strike you, but I couldn't do that or stoop to that level. Don't worry; I shan't come near you again. You can do what you want and keep yourself locked away. I see now that it was never possible between you and I, even now. Fool I was to believe if I changed and proved myself, you would open your heart to me. Your heart is too cold; you won't let yourself feel anything save bitter repulsion for me. I tried to win your love but the cards were always against us. God, Scarlett! Is your heart really that cold you could never love again?"

There was no reply. Scarlett felt shocked and paralyzed by his harsh words. They doused her as if they were cold water. Rang on her mind and she stared at him with horrified eyes. Then he sighed and his fists clenched.

"I suppose it is too late," Rhett continued, "Good bye, Scarlett."

He turned and Scarlett watched him leave. Fear paralyzed her. No. Rhett was leaving her again. Hearkened back to the most freighting time in her life: Melanie dying, Rhett leaving her. That is when she realized history was repeating its self and this was her fault for wishing to push him away.

"Rhett! Please stop!" Scarlett cried, rushing after him.

She watched him pause with relief and grabbed a hold of his arm pleadingly. "Rhett, I don't know," tears of frustration and fear rose up. "I don't know what is wrong with me. I- you, all I know is I do not want you to leave. I-"

"Do you love me, Scarlett?" he asked, but his eyes showed he knew her answer and held little hope.

"I- I want to love you. Want to feel as I used to, but I am not sure if I can trust myself, Rhett. "

"Are you at least fond of me?" Rhett quietly asked.

Scarlett nodded, biting her lip. "Yes. I am fond of you. I always have been. I-" A shameful look crossed her face as she touched his lip. "I am sorry for what I did to you. I suppose I tried to punish you for hurting me. And for Mammy. I can't forget so soon, I'll never be able to forget. I had to forget everyone else and push on, little time to mourn. In my own way I need to mourn, Rhett."

"I want you to Scarlett. And I know I am no saint. I know I have pushed too hard, I am not a patient man by nature. From now on, I will not force my help where it is unwanted. Only if you ask me. Is that fair?"

For the first time in ages she felt a little hope. A little better. The pain she felt about Mammy was still there. Yet hope mingled and perhaps with time she could feel something… she once loved Rhett and perhaps that part of her heart could be unburied.

"I think I might be able to grow to love you," Scarlett mused aloud.

Rhett cracked a small smile. "That sounds like a business negotiation, Scarlett Butler. But I do know one thing; when you are determined to do something, heaven help if anyone or anything gets in you way! I desire your love, Scarlett, truly I do."

Bringing her hand up to his, Rhett kissed it reverently. Sucking in a breath, Scarlett felt the old desire rock throughout her. She wanted to be his, have him take her over and know that swirling darkness again. Even then she knew she should tell him about the baby, but told herself she would later, perhaps she would be able to tell him another piece of news too.

"Rhett," she breathed against his lips. "I desire you." Yes, it was bold but something about Rhett and the way he felt about her made her feel bold, over time she had grown bolder.

He groaned. "Scarlett, you do not know how hard it is to refuse your body, but I am through making love to a woman who doesn't love me, if I wanted just a body I would take a whore. And you, my dear mean far more than that to me. I will have to live as a celibate priest until then," Rhett weakly joked.

Raising a brow, Scarlett smirked. "You a celibate? I hardly believe that."

"Well, even if I do not touch, I can sure as hell look and lust." The dark eyes swept across her body slowly and caressingly. This caused Scarlett to shiver. Even she had to admit though some part of her had felt dead, Rhett made her feel alive. She couldn't escape how he made her feel how; he had always made her feel.

"You are impossible and incorrigible, Rhett Butler," Scarlett chidingly said but she did feel flattered and her eyes gleamed.

Then he moved closer and his lips were a scant inch from hers. Could feel his warm breath fanning her face. "And you would have it no other way, would you?"

When she didn't answer, he sighed and she could tell he had hoped for an answer. Instead he gave her hand a quick kiss and told her not to drink alone, then turned to leave her in the hall.

"No, Rhett," Scarlett called out. "I wouldn't have you any other way."

He seemed startled and Scarlett felt slightly nervous and embarrassed. "I am going to see Georgia," she told him and brushed past him quickly, not wishing for him to read her expression until she figured out her feelings for him herself.

Once out of Rhett's sight, Scarlett placed a hand to her madly beating heart. She still burned from his touch and she felt so confused, her brow furrowed. She needed to get a hold of herself, no long was she a green girl of sixteen and the belle of a county, she was a woman and surely would not let Rhett throw her off balance.

But he already had and she felt everything in the world to be beautiful, hopeful and terrifying. If she allowed herself to love Rhett again what would happen, to what end? Perhaps it was time to find out and Scarlett raised her shoulders, a determined look on her face. Two could play a game, but this time she would be sure she was the one in control and her and Rhett would not move too fast, for if they did Scarlett felt she would surely bolt and perhaps what Rhett and her could have would be lost. It was time to take the chance and gamble.

TBC


	64. Jealousy

Note: We're nearing the end of Dream of Triumph and I am saddened and at the same time elated about this nearly 4-year-old story. Please enjoy and as always thank you fro the reviews.

Part 64

As soon as Scarlett walked through the front door, an excited Rhett stopped her. Her hand flew to her stomach in surprise. In Rhett's arms was Georgia and she giggled, reaching out towards her mother.

"God's nightgown, Rhett! You scared me to death. Can't a woman walk into her own home without being assaulted?" Scarlett wryly asked, but her eyes swept across his darn animated face and proud eyes and she smiled, reaching out to take Georgia in her arms.

"Mama, I wu-ke," Georgia said seriously, pretty lips pinched.

Scarlett laughed and kissed her cheeks. "Precious, I can't understand you." Then she looked at Rhett. "Well, what is it?"

"A surprise, something happened today, my pet. But you'll have to wait until later for the surprise."

"A surprise? Oh, Rhett!" Her interest was piqued as they moved further into the foyer. "Oh, do tell, you can't leave me on tanter hooks. This is the best thing I have heard all day save gossip from Mrs. Merriweather and the other ladies."

"No," Rhett teased firmly, "Later."

She pouted. "Oh, you are impossible, Rhett Butler! I shall find out some other way, mark my words."

"We'll see about that." He grinned.

"Oh, why do you like teasing me?" she grumbled with a small glare and smiled as looked down at Georgia.

"I tease you Scarlett because I enjoy that sweet look that crosses your face: annoyance, interest and your lively spirit comes out. It is too hard to resist."

"Well, I wish you would," she exclaimed. "Very well though, I assure you I will find out… sooner or later."

"How was the store?" Rhett asked, swiftly changing the subject.

Oh, she knew what Rhett was doing. Then she slowly smiled. "Some people hear highly interesting things… I heard a pretty piece of gossip, but…"

"But what?" Rhett coaxed.

"But I shall not tell you if you do not tell me."

Throwing back his head, Rhett laughed, causing Georgia to giggle. "Daddy is funny, mama!"

"I know sweetheart. Daddy usually is, isn't he?" Scarlett smiled, kissing her again. Georgia looked so much like Rhett. Her skin wasn't her pale hue, but a little darker like Rhett's, her eyes the pretty hazel and hair jet black and straight.

Ella and Wade walked in to see the scene unfolding, Ella seemed excited and Scarlett smiled, quirking her brow.

"Is there something you wish to share Ella Lorena?"

"I- I," Ella stammered and gave Rhett and Wade a look. "I am not supposed to tell mother."

"Ella," Wade warned, "it's supposed to be a surprise."

"Fine," the girl grumbled, "Wade. Uncle Rhett can't we just show mother now? I am not very good at keeping secrets."

Rhett grinned, his white teeth flashing. Pride rang in his features and Scarlett wondered why. Then Rhett moved towards her, grabbed Georgia out of her arms. Their hands brushed and Scarlett's eyes met Rhett's as he turned to move away from her. What was this all about? Scarlett wondered as she watched Rhett whisper something in Georgia's ear and when he was a slight distance away from Scarlett, he set Georgia onto her feet.

The little girl wobbled a little and looked at Scarlett. One small foot moved in front of the other as she headed towards Scarlett. "Mama, I wu-ke," she said, smiling. Aghast, Scarlett stopped low as Georgia made the short distance and fell into Scarlett's arms. Tears of joy escaped Scarlett's eyes and she kissed Georgia's cheek.

"Baby, mama is so proud of you!" Motherly joy filled Scarlett. "You are becoming such a big girl now."

Scarlett's eyes moved up to meet Rhett's. His expression was filled with love, joy and pride. It hit her deeply and moved her. Pulling their daughter closer to her, Scarlett rose to her feet, and then bit her lip, face beaming.

"I kept the secret," Ella boasted.

Her older brother rolled his eyes. "Just barely. You nearly cracked."

"Oh, hush!" Ella cried, stamping her foot. "Mother was surprised, wasn't she?"

"I was Ella, very much so," Scarlett told them, chest tight with pride and amusement at Ella and Wade. They were much like how her and Suellen had been. Sometimes she missed Suellen. Wished their relationship had been better. Ella and Wade were close though and she hoped they would always be there for one another.

"Well, children!" Rhett brightly said, "shall we tell your mother our idea?"

They nodded eagerly. The dark eyes of her husband turned towards Scarlett as he neared her and she felt her throat close up. He affected her senses still- was he in her blood? At the same time, she wanted to push herself closer to him and also run from his penetrating gaze.

"What is it?" Scarlett asked, dragging her eyes from Rhett's to Wade and Ella.

"I think a celebration is in order, "Rhett inserted, "don't you my pet?"

Her eyes met his again, the dark orbs warm and taking up her gaze. Managing to nod, she laughed lightly, "Certainly. This is such a joyous day. My big girl is growing up. What did you have in mind Rhett?"

"Dinner outside of this monstrosity. It's been a long time since we have done a family thing, isn't it, Scarlett?"

"You mean in public?" she incredulously asked.

Throwing back his head, Rhett roared with laughter. "Yes, darling. Unless of course you object? I think it's high time we start being a part of society again. All you do is work, do your charities then come home to care for Georgia. Where is your spirit, Mrs. Butler?"

This made her ire rose. As if she did not have a social life anymore. Why, Scarlett thought many seek after me. The grinning face of her husband and his knowing eyes spoke volumes, she knew Rhett wanted a rise out of her. Glaring at him, Scarlett forced a sweet smile.

"Fiddle-dee-dee, Rhett! You act as if I were some recluse. I am social and have a life outside of the home. If it's spirit you want, Rhett Butler, I shall show you spirit."

"Everyone in Atlanta loves mother, Uncle Rhett," Ella chimed in.

"Of course they do Ella," Rhett warmly agreed then walked near Scarlett, she clutched Georgia tighter to her and the girl squirmed. The dark eyes stared seriously and deeply into her eyes. "but none more than your husband." His hands reached up and he gently held her chin his hand and stared at her intently. "I shall look forward to taking you in my arms and dancing again and yet again with you, my love."

Swallowing, Scarlett mutely nodded as he turned. Yet as he was about to leave, she didn't want him to get the upper hand. Triumphantly smiling, she called out, "Unless my dances are already taken."

Surprise registered in his eyes, but then he chuckled as he turned to face her. Shaking his head, Rhett left and whistled a merry tune. Setting Georgia down, Scarlett brightly looked at Wade and Ella.

"What should I wear?" she asked them.

"That's girls business," Wade good-naturedly mumbled and left to follow Rhett.

"Oh, I know mother," Ella babbled, proceeding to rush to her mother take a hold of her hand and drag her and Georgia up the stairs to head to Scarlett's wardrobe.

XXX

Rhett couldn't take his eyes off Scarlett as all were seated at a table. The woman before him was just too breathtaking and tempting to resist. Ever since Georgia was born Scarlett had lost some weight, but a glow and rosy hue still hung about her cheeks. Knowing her skin was silken made him long to do very indecent things in public and he wished to just kiss her lips.

This evening she had decided on a cream colored gown with black velvet running along her sleeves, about her waist. The dark hair was pinned high and tendrils framed her sharply defined face, the cat green eyes calm and at ease, as beguiling as the first day he'd laid eyes on her at the barbeque.

"What are you staring at?" Scarlett broke into his thoughts with a bemused expression, the look in her eyes showed she knew when a man was giving her attention.

"Oh, just some women over there," he joked quietly, hoping the children didn't hear. "I may ask one to dance."

"Rhett Butler," she fumed, "you, sir are a cad and to just think I dressed with you in mind."

"Did you Scarlett?" Rhett quietly asked, his eyes sweeping across her appreciatively, "because even after all these years you are a vision and have me transfixed."

A sharp breath left her mouth. "You found me beautiful then?"

"I always have."

"But you said there were far more beautiful women," she reminded him, still thinking of the annoyance and hurt she felt when he had went to other's beds.

"Yes, they may be physically more attractive but your Irish spirit they do not possess. No other woman has or will as thoroughly enrapture me as you have Scarlett."

"You are a smooth talk," she dryly stated, eyes dancing, "but you best remember Rhett Butler I was the belle of the county and can have any man I please."

Ah, yes I remember," he rose a brow, "they were all old enough to be your father."

"Oh, hush!" Scarlett fumed, reluctantly smiling though, as she sipped some of her wine and Rhett dragged his eyes away from her and back to the children, Ella in particular who looked bored. She watched the people who danced and sighed wistfully, he saw that look in her eyes, wishing to be older.

"Why, Miss Kennedy!" Rhett proclaimed, waiting as Ella turned a doleful expression to him. "I am mighty shocked that no man has been brave enough to ask you to dance, but I am no coward and ask that you would allow me a dance, that is if your beautiful mother is fine with it?"

"Well," Scarlett slowly said and relented with a laugh. "Yes, Ella Lorena you may but you must be on your best behavior."

Ella stood up so quickly she nearly knocked her chair over and both Rhett and Scarlett shared an amused look. He felt his heart lodge in his throat as Scarlett, Georgia and Wade watched him. It had been so long since they all had been a family, the part of his heart was missing that Bonnie took with her, but he felt there finally long at last was hope. Slowly he could gain Scarlett's trust and love and all this felt right.

It was fun dancing with Ella, but he was stopped when he saw a red haired woman in the distance. It was Belle and her painted lips turned into a kind smirk as she read him, she could always read him better than any other woman for he'd known her longer than Scarlett, longer than any other woman save his mother and sister.

Then she headed his way and Rhett's eyes flicked over to gauge Scarlett's reaction. Scarlett's eyes were now in green angry slits and her brows furrowed. Rhett knew part of him should ignore Belle for propriety sake, but he did not have it in his heart to be rude to Belle, she possessed a good heart of gold.

"Belle," Rhett bowed.

"Rhett," Belle huskily returned, smiling. "It is good to see you. You haven't seen me for awhile now."

"Too long," Rhett agreed, "but I have been busy with my family." Then he looked down at Ella. "Honey perhaps you should return to Scarlett so I can speak with Miss Watling?"

Ella appeared hesitant, but mutely nodded and quickly left. Scarlett watched from the table, fuming as Rhett actually had the gall to dance with that woman! Oh she was angry and knew causing a scene would be detrimental to all her work to save her reputation.

"Children," Scarlett brightly said, "I think it is time we left."

Being an astute young man, Wade knew what Scarlett meant and nodded. "Yes, mother. Come along Ella. I can carry Georgia out mother."

The family left quickly and Scarlett hoped to leave in the carriage before Rhett noticed. Her shame was too great. That man claimed to lover her? Then how on God's green earth could he dance with that woman? Thoughts swirled frantically in her mind from wishing to slap him and tear his eyes out, to wanting to cry. Placing a hand on her stomach, she took a few deep breaths and reminded herself she had the baby to think about as well.

They managed to make it outside to the carriage; the children entered it, Wade last with Ella when Scarlett froze. She heard quick footfalls and Rhett's voice ordering her to stop. Flinging around, Scarlett glared at him, trying to keep her lips from trembling.

"What you are done embarrassing us by dancing with that Watling creature so soon?" she acidly said.

"Scarlett, it was not like that-"

"I do not care what it was like! I care how it looked. Rhett, how on God's green earth could you dance with her in public? I do not care if you dally with all your whores but not in public and not in front of the children!"

His eyes became cold. "Dally? It is not like that. I thought you knew me better than that. It is you I love, Scarlett. But all she has done for me when you were not there cannot be forgotten. She, second to you and mother and Rosemary is a woman worthy of respect, despite her reputation she has a heart of gold."

Jealousy consumed Scarlett. "And I? Your wife, what am I worthy of? You treated me like a whore, like a child that you could fool and make fun of."

"That was in the past," Rhett sadly said, "and I have told you a million times how sorry I am Scarlett. I am at my wit's end. You have my love, you have my devotion, my faithfulness- what else can I give you? What else! I have given you all of me."

Scarlett could not deny he had a point and she swallowed, looking away. "How can I know you are truly faithful? You aren't known as a faithful man Rhett, why the whole time we were married you were bedding," her voice dropped to a discreet whisper, "whores."

Rhett grew frustrated. "I told you I am faithful and only want you. How can I prove it? I can't. The only way is if you believe me Scarlett. You know we have shared a bed every night and if not I am in my room. Those days are over and the only bed I wish and heart I wish is yours."

The fight left Scarlett slightly. "Just do not dance with her again in public," she grumbled, still upset and turned to head into the carriage, but Rhett's arm stopped her firmly on her shoulder.

"Scarlett," Rhett begged, "do not withdraw from me."

"How can I not? You were married to me and held no qualms bedding other women. That is the way you are Rhett and you're still as attractive as the devil, so many women would be with you."

"I do not want women," he interjected, "I want one woman. You, Scarlett. Good God what can I do? I am tired of this back and forth between us and want to meet on the same page. Can we or should I not come home tonight?"

"Should you? I do not care, Rhett Butler! Go off to your whores then for I know you find more solace with that Watling woman. Why, you stare at her with more tenderness than you do me!"

"You're jealous," he said in a low voice, "and making a fool out of yourself. All this, is a figment of your imagination to push me away more and throw away any chance we may have Scarlett. Fine, I do not force myself where I am not wanted and I did nothing wrong. I have been a damn saint for you. Do not wait up!"

Turning, he angrily walked away into the inky night. Her heart sank. She wished to call him back, tell him she was sorry and had lost her temper out of jealousy and fear. No doubt he would bed a whore and Scarlett felt the tears fall, as her stomach turned and she wrenched on the side of the carriage, shoulders heaving.

Wade quickly came out to aid her and held her hand silently as Scarlett cried on his shoulder, realizing how tall he was becoming. Then her heart turned miserably in her chest when she thought about Rhett.

"_Rhett please don't leave me." Scarlett hysterically pleaded, face illuminated by the blood red sunset and fire billowing in the air. "I'll never forgive you"_

_ "I'm not asking you to forgive me," Rhett passionately answered, dragging her unwilling self along with him. His rough hands holding her still, "but if there is one thing I know Scarlett is that I love you, despite you, me and the silly world falling to pieces I love you…" _

Her mind flashed back to the day on Rough and Ready, the words and the feel of his lips desperately against hers. It's as if he were leaving again. But should she go after him? No. She would not. No need to go gallivanting around town when she was pregnant and with the children at night.

If he did not come home by tomorrow evening, no doubt she would go after him and find him in a drunken stupor. Heart twisting, she held back the tears for Wade's sake though her throat burned and she felt like sobbing.

"It's alright, Wade," she squeezed his hand. "Let's go home…"

TBC


	65. Beginning to Love again

Note: This chapter is Rated M.

Thank you to Sugargirl002, LoveandaFighter, SkyBlueSw, ScarlettLovesRhett, Liz86000, Athenav1 and littlegirlblood for your reviews! Once again, enjoy!

Late November 1875

Part 65

That night was very still as Scarlett lay in bed. Lou had put the children in bed for her and helped her dress. In Lou, Scarlett had a kind housekeeper and, none could replace her Mammy nevertheless Lou's help was appreciated. Oh, it seemed so long ago the last time she rested her head on Mammy's bosom. Now, she missed Mammy and Melly fiercely. To have someone who understood her. Rhett did not seem to or understand why she would be so upset.

No doubt he was bedding another woman and her heart filled with ice and she tried to hold back her tears, but sobbed in her pillow. "I hate him," she whispered raggedly in the pillow, "I hate him, hate him…"

Placing a hand on her stomach, she felt the slight bump, soon she would begin to show her pregnancy. Tonight she would have told Rhett if he hadn't deemed it appropriate to humiliate her with that whore.

In her mind, she tried to hate Rhett- tired to pretend it didn't matter he was sleeping with another woman. Yet it did matter. Scarlett couldn't hate him, anymore than she could stay away from Tara. The tears fell in earnest and she vacantly stared out her window from her bed, the moonlight hitting her face, until the clouds covered it and the room was suffused in darkness.

She sank deeper into the bed, burying her face in the pillow as she cried her last tears. After this, she would not allow herself the luxury of tears. Rhett made his descion to leave. He always ran and she always pushed him away. Perhaps it would always be doomed to repeat.

Then her mind went to another thing they were doomed to repeat: Rhett loved her and she hated him, or so she thought. Later she realized she loved him but he claimed to no longer love her. This time they had reached full circle and Rhett again said he loved her, but after all the pain she would not allow herself to entertain that she may love him.

"Must I break the cycle?" she asked herself. "How shall Rhett and I ever have peace unless I find out if I still may love? I want to stay in his arms and be held. I want him to protect me like he did when we were first married, but was it all an illusion?"

Still, Scarlett knew the truth. When she had been in Rhett's arms after lovemaking, she'd idly thought of Ashley. "_Damn you're traitorous heart." _Then he'd left her, confused and feeling angry. He knew she loved Ashley going in, he surely had. The past made more sense, the times Rhett and her were so close to being together and the times they both pulled away. They ran from each other when this whole time… she should have ran to Rhett and he to her.

"Oh, Melly," Scarlett thought, "You loved Ashley so, knew all along that I cared for Rhett. How can I finally have peace?"

_Quit fighting. Quit struggling. _The words floated to her heart. It was no longer the war, no longer the days of the old when she went after a man who did not want her. Rhett wanted her- he loved her and she did not have to fight her feelings as if they were the enemy. The only enemy would be the unhappiness that in nights like these consumed her.

Then she froze as her door rattled and she sat up, heart jumping. The door was pushed open and she came face to face with the dark silhouette of Rhett.

"Rhett?" Scarlett asked, voice husky with tears. Her breath stopped, she hoped it was him. Knew it had to be.

"Scarlett…" In an instant he crossed the room and stood in front of her, looking down, silently as if we were struggling.

"I am sorry," he continued, "I did a lot of thinking…" He rubbed a hand across his stubble. "You were right. I do care for Belle, but it is you I love, my pet. Anyways the point is I shouldn't have spoken with her then. I was not thinking and so for that I apologize and apologize for our argument, darling. We are supposed to be working together and not fighting one another."

Her hand reached out to his in a token of acceptance and they held hands. "Then you didn't…" she trailed off; face conflicted with all her thoughts and Rhett being at those establishments.

"No," he whispered, hand reaching out to cup her cheek. "Despite my threats and what you assumed, I still love you honey and I don't want other women. I am not known to be faithful, but have turned a new leaf and why should I seek another woman's bed when you offer such a nice bed?"

"I am glad you came back," she tremulously whispered, squeezing his hand.

"Were you crying?" Rhett asked, sounding ashamed through Scarlett couldn't read his expression in the dark. His thumb wiped her tears away.

Nodding mutely, Scarlett wound her arms around Rhett as he leaned over and embraced her. She moved so he could sit beside her on the bed, all the while holding her. His touch soothed her momentarily as her hand still firmly was in his warm one.

"My pet, are you okay? It's as if you're miles away. I am sorry…" He cursed himself. "I shouldn't have left you."

She placed his hand on her stomach and understanding flooded between them. For a moment he seemed shocked as a silence followed then he cleared his throat.

"How long?" he gently asked.

"Three months. I do want this child Rhett."

"You do?" he hesitantly asked, a small smile on his lips as he gently kissed her forehead and she burrowed her head on his shoulder.

"I do, Rhett," then she reached up and touched his stubble, his cheek. It's as if she were seeing him for the first time. Had she ever really seen Rhett? Scarlett felt queer, as if everything were changing. It was as if the swirling darkness was taking over her again. "I wish to kiss you, Rhett."

He leaned over and softly placed his lips against hers. They tentatively kissed.

_Likes marry likes. Women often fall in love with their husbands? _Rhett and I were made for each other, Scarlett foggily thought, mind pounding from his intoxicating kisses. It's as if fate destined we should meet when we did. Who would have thought when I confessed my love for Ashley, Rhett was there the entire time? No… Even Mammy Jincy knew, whom Scarlett had wrote off as a crazy woman.

_ "You will marry a dark haired man with a black mustache."_ Mammy Jincy had told her.

_"I don't want to marry a man with black hair!" Scarlett cried, nearly stamping her foot. "I do not even like dark haired men."_

Her throat felt dry, cold ice water doused Scarlett and she turned her pointed chin towards Rhett, their eyes opened and met in the darkness- lips still clinging. Scarlett forgot about holding herself back and pushed Rhett over, climbing atop him desperately- she needed to feel him.

She roughly pulled off his shirt; he pushed her nightgown up and jerked his hips upward, quickly hard and straining against her.

"Scarlett," he begged as Scarlett giggled and her hands moved to undo his trousers, she pulled them off from his hips daringly along with the union suit he wore underneath, finally revealing Rhett's magnificent body. This was bolder than she usually was and perhaps she should blush, but she did not care!

"I need you," she breathed, wiggling her hips tauntingly above him.

His hands captured her hips firmly. "Then take me," he gritted, it all happening so fast. Then in one smooth motion he entered her, hips bucking upwards.

Head falling back, a scream of pleasure welled in her throat. Did not escape quite yet, however Scarlett's breathing became more ragged. Both rocked frantically, him bucking up hard into her and Scarlett bearing down with her weight. She moaned and he gasped, head falling back.

"Oh God, Scarlett…"

"God, R-Rhett," she whimpered. "Faster."

Eagerly he complied, moving so that he was half sitting up and she placed her hands on his shoulders, anchoring herself as they moved in the same fast rocking motion. Rhett couldn't believe how beautiful and inhibited Scarlett looked; her green eyes a story color and her face pale and lovely. It shouldn't have surprised him since he had taken her many times like this. Though something in her face, actions were different than other times. His mind was too fogged and pounding with pleasure as he moved within her, he did not analyze the change. It shook him.

Their pleasure reached a fever pitch and both lost control as Rhett continued to pound in her depths. This time Scarlett screamed his name loudly, convulsing around Rhett as he gave one last rough thrust and reached his own pleasure with a husky moan.

As she lay satiated in his arms in the aftermath, Scarlett blissfully smiled at him beneath her. Her naked body still draped across him and her head resting on his hard chest. While Rhett pulled her warm body closer against him and gave her a light, languid kiss to her lips. He felt at peace and satiated, his body now wishing to sleep and his eyes closed, smelling the lilac clinging to Scarlett's damp hair.

"Rhett?" Scarlett murmured, looking down at him.

"Hmm?"

"I love-" Then her voice halted and he felt her freeze up in his arms. Rhett's eyes flew open and a flame entered them, hope in the dark orbs, breath abated. Would she-

"I mean," she said in a rush, "that is I love being here with you." She moved off of him to settle next to his side.

Disappointment replaced the eagerness, yet he merely pulled her closer and tried to tell himself this was enough for now. "Me too, honey." Finally Rhett Butler closed his eyes and laid his head on Scarlett's bare chest, her heart was beating madly, still no doubt slowing down from their intense lovemaking.

Hours later, Scarlett didn't dare move an inch. The sun was now beginning to rise over Georgia and move high in the skyline. No. She could not believe what she had been about to admit to herself, to him. Almost effortlessly _I love you, _slipped from her lips. Instead, she changed her words quickly and only settled down when Rhett had fell asleep.

"God's nightgown," she breathed, fear paralyzing her. Looked at her sleeping husband, face soft and peaceful. Even she could detect a slight smile on his lips while sleeping. Her heartbeat picked up madly.

She was no fool and realized with startling clarity, "_Great balls of fire, I am beginning to love Rhett again..._"

XXX

Scarlett fled, like a coward she dressed in the wee hours before Rhett arose. Fumbled in the darkness to dress in her rumpled clothing, did not dare venture into her walk in closet lest she make too much noise from having difficulty seeing. Eventually her eyes adjusted to the semi darkness in the room.

Once she almost tripped over her boots and held back a frustrated cry. Rhett moving in the bed reached her ears and she lost all breath, fear gripping her as she watched him. Fortunately he settled back to sleep and her shoulders relaxed.

Oh, thank God she thought, taking a deep breath. She knew Rhett would be able to read her newfound confusion and feelings in her eyes. Hadn't he always? Once he said she never fooled him and he could read her like a book, well she must escape before he knew and when he knew, she was certain he would be elated, but as for her she could not be elated at that moment.

"Scarlett," she told herself fiercely when in her carrige, "quit being a fool. Rhett loves you, he would be happy should he know."

Head falling back against the leather interior of the Butler carriage, she raised her hand and tried to smooth her unruly hair, made even wilder from Rhett and her lovemaking. The memories came back to her and her cheeks flushed.

The outside scenery seemed foreign to her, caught up in the orange glow. Odd. She had seen the sprawl everyday she'd lived in Atlanta, but everything seemed different, inside she did feel different because of Rhett.

Still, she could not say the words aloud even to herself. The carriage stopped with a rock in front of the store. Getting quickly out, she rushed inside and headed to her office.

"Oh, I hope Rhett doesn't come here," she whispered aloud to the empty store. Biting her lip, she paced in her office, placing a hand on her stomach. "What shall I say? Oh I will sound like a fool. I can't think about how he made me feel, I can't. I'll think about it tomorrow and try to act as if nothing changed. Yes…"

"Scarlett?" a male voice asked and Scarlett let out a scream, eyes meeting befuddled gray ones.

"Ashley?" Scarlett asked, face flooding with relief. "You gave me a scare. Thank God, I thought you were-"

"Rhett?" he asked, smiling gently. "I heard everything you said, my dear. Anyways I came by early to start the mills but I saw you here surprisingly early so I wished to say hello. I have not seen you in these parts lately." Then he reached out and took her hands in his. "I have missed you."

"I have missed you too, Ashley." She felt guilty she had not looked much after Ashley lately. After all she had promised Melly.

"How have you been, Scarlett?"

"Oh, Ashley," Scarlett choked, tears beginning to flow and she couldn't hold them back, try as she might. She disliked crying and showinfg the weakness and mortification filled her. "Oh, I am sorry, I am such a silly goose. It must be the baby. When I was pregnant with Ella I wept all the time. Just ignore me, please."

She watched through blurry eyes as his thin arms wrapped about her and she laid her head on his chest, feeling safe like in the old days. There was no spark or passion left between her and Ashley, only friendship- an very old and dear friendship from a different era.

"Tell me about it," Ashley melodic voice filed her ears and she looked up to be greeted by his soft smile. "I am an ever-ready ear for you, my dear. What else are good friends for?"

TBC


	66. Are we free?

Note: Rated M again. I know I have written many love scenes however there will only be one more after this before the story ends. (I enjoy smut but also plot of course) I find myself writing and writing during the most stressful times in my life, which is why I have written so much lately. It is very therapeutic! Please enjoy!

Thank you ScarlettLovesRhett, Sugargirl002, BlaqueCat13, LoverandaFigjter, Athnav1, Joyce LaKee and saragwtw!

(Also to avoid any confusion, I decided to jump ahead a year. Meaning Georgia is 2 years old and it is late 1876 NOT 1875. I messed up on the dates.)

Part 66

After a breath, Scarlett ceased speaking with Ashley and awaited his reaction. She had divulged enough of the story without embarrassing herself. The gray eyes were alert and searched her gaze; he placed a gentle had on hers.

"Tell Rhett you love him. I know you do my dear. You cannot fool me. I may not be the smartest of men, especially when it comes to the world. The world is hard for me to stomach without my Melly, but I know you. Ever since you were a small girl of fifteen and already becoming the belle of the county. You have the greatest capability to love, Scarlett than any woman I have met, to feel and to act. Most women would wait for the man yet you must go after it. Please, it would not do for your and Mr. Butler's story to be a Shakespearian tragedy."

"Shakespeare, Ashley?" Scarlett asked, mystified. "What on earth does Shakespeare have to do with Rhett and I? Truthfully he bored me to tears."

"He wrote tragedies, Scarlett. Take Romeo and Juliet. Star crossed lovers whose families feuded and Romeo thought Juliet dead so he killed himself. The girl was not dead though and of a broken heart she stabbed herself."

"Why, Ashley that is horrible!" Scarlett cried, appalled, "but they were fools. I would never be so foolish to end my life, even if it did get awful."

Ashley chuckled. "Well, you are strong. You're not like us weaker sorts. That is why I am telling you, my dear to embrace happiness with both hands…" He grabbed her hands and placed them together, "and hold onto it tightly, keep it. Melly so wanted you and Rhett to be happy. I don't like Rhett much, but Melly was good and pure, she knew Rhett and you well. She always cheered you both on, raved about how deeply you both were in love, Scarlett."

"She did Ashley?" Scarlett's voice became soft and tears entered her eyes. "Oh, sweet Melly. Why did she never tell me?"

Smiling, Ashley shrugged. "Perhaps she was embarrassed or afraid you would lose your temper."

A smile twitched at the corners of her lips. "I suppose the old me would have. I am the same me, Ashley deep down. Only a little calmer and a little more grown up. Not as intemperate."

"You have grown, Scarlett… we have all grown. After Bonnie- died all of Atlanta thought Rhett and your marriage would dissolve, that the child was the only reason you both were still together. I did not say anything, but Melanie stood up for you both and angrily told them, "Scarlett loves Mr. Butler and he her, how dare you say such hurtful and horrid things. They shall last, for their love and passion is great."

"She said that?" Scarlett asked, shock gripping her although it should not have. "Oh Melly. I miss her so Ashley, everyday. She was my best friend even though I did not know it. This world and I were not worthy of her! I miss her, ma, pa Suellen, Mammy- all those links to the past are gone. Only you and I are left Ashley."

"Yes," murmured Ashley, a faraway look in his eyes. "I miss the old days, but they were an illusion and time vanquished it. You my dear are very real. Your and Rhett's love shall triumph and you know how I know this better than I know most things?"

She shook her head silently.

"Because I know you," he continued passionately, "I know who you are Scarlett and the army could not lick you, the war, the loss of our loved ones. It is all over and now it is time for you to grab happiness and live in the present, something I am not able to do."

Groaning, aggravated with herself, Scarlett sighed and clenched her hands. "I know I must. The truth is I was so afraid of Sherman's army, so afraid of that damned war but kept going on. I went on because it was that or die. Now, I find my feelings scare me far more than any army. I am afraid of allowing myself to be hurt again. I know what Rhett went through all those years when I thought I was in love with you. It's so painful; Ashley when one waits and hopes. I resented Rhett for not loving me when I realize now I resented myself for being so blind and childish."

"Yes my dear and you are no longer a child. How old are you now anyways?" he teased.

Scarlett chuckled. "Why, Ashley Wilkes! What a question, you should know a true lady never reveals her age."

Laughing, he threw up his hands in surrender. . "Very well. I do know you are no longer 16 and do not look a day over twenty-five. You are a woman to be very much admired and your strength is that of Artemis."

"Artemis?" Scarlett asked, it was times like these she felt Ashley was speaking another language.

"Did you not read about the Greeks, Scarlett?"

Wrinkling her nose, Scarlett laughed. "Fiddle-dee-dee, Ashley! You should know I do not like to read. Some books are dreadfully boring. Tell me, who is Artemis?"

"She was Zeus' daughter and asked him to never make her marry. When insulted she could be deathly angry. Her admirable traits were that she was a hunter and protector. A strong goddess."

Her heart swelled with gratitude for Ashley and felt flattered. Once she believed she loved him and then hated him, blaming him for her and Rhett's problems. Like she said, Ashley was her dearest friend and the last link to the old days- to Melanie, to her carefree days at Tara. Gently, she held his hand.

"And what about you, Ashley? Surely you are free also?"

"No, when Melly was here I was free. I never knew how to live Scarlett except behind my books and Twelve Oaks. I was never made for this world like you were. But you shouldn't be here with me, you know you wish to be with Rhett."

"You are-" Scarlett broke off when she heard someone clear their throat. A deep voice and her blood froze. It was Rhett, she was certain!

Turning cautiously, her eyes met Rhett's. A somber expression lighted his face and he nodded his head in acknowledgement to Ashley.

"Mr. Wilkes."

"Hello, Rhett," Ashley smiled; he dared use his first name. "Well I am off to run the mills into the ground." Then he reached over and placed a gentle hand on Scarlett's shoulder. "Good-bye my dear."

"No! You do not need to go Ashley," Scarlett objected, nervous.

"I think it is high time I left. You and Mr. Butler have things to speak about. See you soon, my dear."

With that, Ashley humbly took his leave and Scarlett turned her green eyes to Rhett's. Bit her lip and then smiled nervously. "Hello, Rhett…"

"You were not there when I awoke," he voiced, eyes uncertain. "I did not hurt you, did I?"

"No! Oh, no of course not, Rhett. I-" She racked her mind trying to think of anything to say. "I felt embarrassed with how wanton I acted." Face flamed. "I usually do not act that way and good Lord, it's enough to make a saint blush."

A roar of laughter from Rhett made her cross her arms. "Rhett!"

"I am sorry, Scarlett," he chuckled, "I thought you did not believe in a heaven."

"I am not a heathen, I'll have you know! I believe in a heaven and as you very well know, a hell. I have seen hell. I am glad you are here…"

"And what of Ashley?" Rhett asked.

Suddenly, Scarlett felt defensive and nervous. Would he even assume she still had feelings for Ashley? If so, he was so wrong.

"What about Ashley, Rhett?"

"No need to get defensive my pet, I hear that ruffled tone in your voice. You are acting as guilty as hell for something, but I know it had nothing to do with Ashley Wilkes." Taking a step forward towards her, Scarlett wanted to shrink back from him but instead averted her gaze. Until Rhett's hand firmly tilted her chin up and her eyes were locked on the warm glow of his dark eyes.

"What is it, honey? What caused you to flee so early in the morning? Are you angry with me?"

"I? Angry at you? No. At first I was livid you spoke with that Watling woman, but you came back. I am simply overwhelmed, Rhett. The baby… I do want the baby, it just feels everything is so sudden is all."

"My poor darling," he drew her closer to him and tenderly kissed her on the lips. "All you need do was tell me. That is understandable, honey. I want the baby too, Mrs. Butler. I believe we shall have another girl and we should name her after Miss Melly."

She felt relieved Rhett did not question her further. "A girl? Fiddle-dee-dee! We have far too many girls and poor Wade is alone. I wish for a boy."

"A boy? Good God! He shall be trouble with the Butler and O'Hara blood. Look at me and how your father was."

"He shall have spirit," Scarlett determinedly said, ignoring him with an excited smile, "and look as handsome as his father."

"You think I am handsome?" Rhett asked with mock shock, throwing a hand dramatically to his chest.

Playfully hitting his arm, Scarlett rolled her eyes but giggled. "Oh, shut up! You know you are far too handsome for your own good. I have always thought you looked good. You are as handsome as the devil."

"Hmm… that must be it." His arm snaked around her waist and he pulled her to his chest, beginning to kiss her neck and Scarlett's breath grew shallow, her hand raking through his hair as he kissed her harder. When his lips met hers and his tongue probed inside, it grew more heated and Scarlett felt her knees grow weak.

"Rhett," she weakly protested against his lips. "Someone might see!"

"Let them see how much I love and desire you, Mrs. Butler," he huskily whispered in her ear. "You left this morning and I wished to take you again. After all, we have to make up for lost time, for soon you will be far too pregnant to give me my marital rights." Winking, he kissed her neck again and Scarlett shuddered.

"You wish to make love here?" Her jaw went slack. "Rhett Butler! That would be far too scandalous and should anyone see us…"

"They won't though… and we'll be discreet."

In an instant, his large hands spanned her waist and he hefted her onto the desk so she was sitting on the edge. Scarlett giggled and felt recklessness in her only Rhett caused. Suddenly she did not care if anyone saw them as Rhett kicked the door shut and preceded to kiss her and kiss her breasts through her gown. Head tipping back, Scarlett gasped.

He pushed her skirts up, undid his trousers and moved between her tighs, accommodating him, Scarlett wrapped her thighs around Rhett's trim waist and he slowly entered her, gauging her reaction with an intense expression.

"Ooooh, Rhett," she whimpered, losing leave of all the surroundings around her. That she was even on a desk and acting like a complete wanton in her own store, where someone could walk in. However the store was not open and her assistant should not arrive for another 20 minutes or so.

"Scarlett, my love," Rhett moaned as he continued to move in her, the desk moving beneath them. It was not long until it brought them both crashing to pleasure.

TBC


	67. Feeling the waters

Early February 1877

Note: I fast-forwarded a year due to wanting Georgia to be a little older. She is 2 and a half right now and Rhett and Scarlett made love on Georgia's second birthday, not her first. Sorry for any confusion. Later on I will go edit the dates. Also, Happy 4th of July to my fellow Americans and if you are not from the U.S. I hope you all have an amazing day in general! Enjoy!

For the 4th, my boyfriend ended up playing _I'm a Good Old Rebel _and for some reason he told me it reminded him of Rhett Butler. I had to agree so here is the last part of it:

"_Oh, I'm a good old Rebel  
Now that's just what I am.  
For this Yankee nation  
I do not give a damn.  
I'm glad I fought agin her,  
I only wish we'd won.  
I ain't asked any pardon  
For anything I've done…_

_I can't take up my musket  
And fight 'em now no more,  
But I ain't going to love 'em,  
Now that is certain sure;  
I don't want no pardon  
For what I was and am,  
I won't be reconstructed  
__**And I do not give a damn**__."_

Part 67

Now 6 months along in her pregnancy, Scarlett found herself almost fully confined in the house. Rhett entertained her when he could however he still sometimes worked at the bank and on his other investments. Sometimes she felt she was going mad, this left her far too much time to think about how she felt about Rhett. They still confounded her.

Her feelings for him were growing in intensity where when he was gone, Scarlett missed him and often would daydream about their nights together. This made a calmer, more serene Scarlett where she smiled more and was less harsh. Still, her boredom did not evaporate and she wished even the old cats would call on her, she longed for the sociality of the functions in Atlanta.

Tonight she sat in the nursery with Georgia. The children were off in their rooms and Georgia had left the nanny, ran into Scarlett's room and poked her mother, trying to wake her up from her nap.

"No one to play wid me," she informed Scarlett seriously.

Scarlett laughed and gave her a kiss to her cheek, "What about Wade or Ella? Very well darling, I shall play with you. Let's go to the nursery." Dr. Meade told Scarlett she must be careful and should not lift anything, even her own daughter, which raised Scarlett's ire. After all she was not made of glass! This would not stop her from playing with Georgia though.

This was her 6th pregnancy and one would think she knew how these things went and did not need advice. The thought made Scarlett pause as her and Georgia entered the nursery and watched the little girl rush to her toy box. After the third child, she swore she would not have anymore. Scarlett knew she loved her children but did not wish to have anymore after this one. Weren't 4 children enough for any women? By the time Wade was ready to leave for college, Georgia would be 6, Ella-14 and the new baby would be 4 years old.

Also Scarlett's body would never be the same again. She knew this and felt self-conscious. Her waist used to measure 16 inches, by the time she had Bonnie, her waist was 18 inches. Today her waist measured to 20 inches. She intended to keep in that way.

"Baby," Scarlett asked Georgia, "how do you feel about a baby brother or sister?"

The girl's face lit up and she smiled. "I can have one for Christmas, mommy?"

"You silly girl," Scarlett laughed, pulling her onto her lap. "No, your baby brother or sister will be born before Christmas.."

"I wanna a kitty," Georgia told her instead, "or a horsey."

Heart lodged in Scarlett's throat, her eyes flew to her daughter's face. "A horsey? Why would you want a horse, Georgia baby when you could have a kitty?"

"Wanna be a cowboy and play wid my horsey."

"Oh," Scarlett breathed, wondering why all her daughters were so free spirited. In ways it made her proud, but also afraid. She could not lose anymore of her children. "How do you know about cowboys?"

"Wade book," she simply said and giggled.

"Well, darling your papa and I can give you a kitty, but not a pony. You may not have a pony until you are much older."

The girl looked disappointed. "When, mama?"

"When you are eighteen. You will be a very big girl then."

"But that is old!" Georgia cried. "Why do I wait?"

"Sometimes we have to wait," Scarlett explained with difficulty, trying to make it as simple as possible so her little child could understand. " Your big sister fell off her pony and got hurt. It made daddy so sad and we don't want you to get hurt, sweetheart, okay?"

"Why can't I see her?" Georgia asked.

Thank heavens Scarlett thought, she is asking me and not Rhett. The mention of Bonnie still hurt Rhett too much. Bonnie would have been nine years old if she were still here. Scarlett mourned for her daughter silently now, but felt that in some way Bonnie lived now through her and Rhett.

"She is in heaven with the angels," she told her daughter, deeply saddened. It had been awhile since she thought of Bonnie. Today she wore the locket though Rhett had given her on Christmas 3 years ago. Touching it gently, she leaned over and kissed Georgia on her forehead.

"Heaven?" Brows furrowing and lips puckering, Georgia looked so adorable and a little like Bonnie, Scarlett's heart broke slightly.

"Heaven is where good people go when the Lord wants to take them. Your grandma, grandfather, big sister Bonnie and Auntie Melly are there."

Wordlessly, Georgia hugged Scarlett tightly with her small arms and rested in her lap. Rocking gently, Scarlett felt the baby flutter within her, giving a strong kick. The baby was thriving and would be healthy. Her life in almost every way was perfect now. Rhett loved her, her children were no longer afraid of her, she had enough money where she would never be poor or lose Tara. However, her heart would always have a part missing without Ma, pa, Mammy, Melanie or Bonnie.

Much had changed. Ever in denial about her age, Scarlett wished she could say she was less than 30 years old. No, she was not. Now she was a 31-year-old woman and everything was far more different than when she was a fresh faced sixteen-year-old girl, so in love with Ashley, spoiled and impetuous. _Why, if I am 31, Rhett must be at least 48. _Where had all the time gone?

She was pulled from her thought when she heard Georgia excitedly squeal. That is when she looked up to see Rhett stride. Georgia scrambled off her lap.

"Daddy!"

Rhett scooped her in his arms and gave Scarlett a tender look, then switched his attention back to Georgia as Scarlett rose to her feet slowly.

"My Georgia peach," Rhett happily said, "I missed my sweetheart. Have you been a good girl for mommy?"

"Yes."

"That's my good girl!" Rhett gave her a smacking kiss on the cheek and she giggled, wrinkling her nose.

"Daddy! Your kisses are wet. Yuck!"

Both Scarlett and Rhett broke out into laughter as Rhett set Georgia down. Then he went over to his wife and warmly looked down at her, "Hello."

"Hello," she warmly replied.

Then he leaned down and kissed her, arms wrapping around her and bringing her to his chest.

"Hmmm," he murmured in the back of his throat. "You smell delightful, Mrs. Butler."

"You smell of brandy and cigars," Scarlett mumbled against his chest then yawned, "I feel tired."

"It's getting late. Shall we retire to bed, my pet?"

She sleepily nodded. "Rhett, can you put Georgia to bed and read her a bedtime story? I am awfully tired and I usually do it for her…"

"No problem," he kissed her again on the lips. "Go to bed and I will meet you in a little bit."

Arching a brow she nodded, "Do not be too late, Rhett, I don't sleep well unless you are with me."

Scarlett methodically reached out and kissed Georgia. "Good night sweet heart."

Sharing a small smile with Rhett, Scarlett turned and left the nursery.

XXX

Rhett entered the room to find Scarlett curled up on her side, soundly sleeping. A small snore emerged from her lips and he grinned, chuckling silently. His wife denied it, but she did snore sometimes, softly yet the sound quite unmistakable.

He noticed she must have been exhausted, for Scarlett wore her clothing and had not bothered to change into her nightgown. Moving forward and admiring how beautiful Scarlett looked, Rhett methodically began to help undress her. It was not long before Scarlett's eyes fluttered open and she smiled up at him.

Quirking a brow, she shot him a look. "Trying to take advantage of me, Rhett Butler?"

"Surely you know your charms, Mrs. Butler? But no, I was merely helping you undress and get ready for bed. You must have fallen right asleep." For some reason one of her buttons was stuck and Rhett struggled with it.

Laughing, Scarlett moved his hand gently away. "Oh, Rhett- here let me. I can undress myself."

"I prefer aiding you, my pet. Very well though…" As soon as he sat on the bed, still fully dressed, he leaned back against the headboard and leisurely placed his arms behind his head. "I am content watching you."

The clothing fell to the heap on the floor, Scarlett no longer worse a corset and he noticed her figure beginning to get fuller from the baby, not very noticeable yet save her protruding stomach. To him, she looked mesmerizing and he felt heat go to his groin. Withholding a groan from emerging from his lips. Rhett tried to think of other things- Scarlett and him would not be able to make love for at least 6 more months.

"Rhett, I was not sure how to bring this up, but…" Scarlett trailed off as she slipped her nightgown on and sat on the edge of the bed, looking rather endearing in Rhett's opinion with her lose, tumbling free curls over her peach colored nightgown.

"Yes?" Rhett encouraged.

"Georgia asked me for a pony."

The breath left Rhett's body and worry spiked through him. It was as if they were speaking of Bonnie. Bonnie. Time made it easier to speak about her, but the hole her death left in his heart would never be fully filled.

"What did you say?" he asked, his face a bland mask.

"Heavens, Rhett! What do you think I said?" Scarlett asked quietly, "I told her not until she was much older." Her hand reached out and touched his sleeve. "Please tell me you won't buy her a pony, Rhett."

Guilt pierced him and vague anger as he shrugged her arm off and walked past her. "Buy her a pony? Do you think I am completely stupid, Scarlett? As if I would put another child of mine through that, she could fall again just like my Bonnie and break her neck. You don't trust me not to place her in danger, is that it? Surely that is why you are asking me not to."

"That is unfair! You know that, Rhett Butler. I only wished to ask you to see…" she trailed off, shaking her head. No. Scarlett did not mean that, she looked up at him from the bed. "I merely mean I know how easily you are swayed by the children, Rhett. I know you would never put Georgia in danger. Please, come sit down next to me." She gestured for him to come over near her.

"No. It worried you for a reason, so say it Scarlett. Do you think I could ever forget watching and holding Bonnie after she broke her neck? Until my dying day I shall never be over what happened to her and so God help me, the same shall never happen to Georgia."

Tears pricked her eyes, Scarlett mutely nodded and watched emotion rock Rhett. He would not cry, yet she saw his eyes misty with tears. Soon he averted his gaze and walked over to the window, looking out into the inky darkness. Never one very good at comforting others, Scarlett was not certain if she should remain on the bed or move over to him.

It broke her heart though to see him in that state and she rose to her feet, softly making her way over to him. Without a word she wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his back. The smell of his cologne and cigars filled her nostrils.

"I am sorry, Rhett. I- wasn't thinking." Swallowing, Scarlett closed her eyes and felt the material of his jacket rub against her face. "I know you would never put Georgia or Wade or Ella for that matter in danger. If Georgia asked, I only wished to make sure you would say no."

"Then you do know that?" Rhett quietly asked, still not looking at her. "I would never do that to Georgia. I assumed you were blaming me again for Bonnie's death and I very much deserve the blame."

"No," Scarlett passionately said and moved her hands on his shoulder, turning him so he was facing her. "Oh, Rhett you know that is not true. I told you- I told you how sorry I was. I did not mean a word of it. I was so afraid, scared and angry that I dind't know what I was saying. Surely you believe I never once blamed you."

"Yes, I know that," he duly said, eyes averted, "but I blame myself. I will never cease blaming myself. It haunts me now and will haunt me for the rest of my life. It was my fault for spoiling her so, but I wished to make her happy. In the end, it killed her. God, I should have stopped her." He smiled sadly, "I had so many plans for her… she would have been ten now, my pet."

The tears rolled down Scarlett's cheek and when Rhett pulled her against his chest, she sobbed. "I miss her so Rhett. Please, do not blame yourself. She would have jumped anyways, just like Pa. I hope you know how dreadfully sorry I truly was for being so mean and hurtful."

"Shh," he soothed her hair. "I know, darling. We can't erase what happened even though I wish we could. All we can do is live now- if we don't we'll only be miserable and I have spent a lot of my life being miserable."

"Me too," she sniffled. "All I have ever wanted is to be happy, Rhett. After Bonnie and Melly d-died then you left, I thought I could never be happy again."

Wordlessly Rhett moved his arm over Scarlett's shoulder and they both walked to the bed. Rhett removed his clothing, placed his pants on. As soon as he blew out the lantern, the room was suffused in darkness. In a moment, he made his way to the bed and crawled in behind Scarlett, spooning her. He took comfort in her soft, feminine scent and his hands rested on her stomach, feeling the baby.

"We can both be happy, Scarlett," he whispered in her ear. "We can't change what happened, but I am not going anywhere. You are stuck with me, unfortunately."

"Well I shall think about staying around you," lightly laughing, Scarlett looked at his large hands spanning her stomach. "That is, if you aren't a cad."

"I shall try to be on my best behavior," he promised mischievously.

"Rhett, I think I like you," she whispered, half asleep.

"Like me?" he grinned.

"Yes, I think I shall keep you around after all. Only if you keep being as nice and sweet to me though."

Sweet? Rhett did not think himself sweet. He placed a gentle kiss to her cheek in the darkness and deeply chuckled.

"You have a bargain, Scarlett Butler. Good night, honey."

"'Night, Rhett," she murmured. Closing her eyes, Scarlett was sound asleep within a minute, feeling very safe and secure in Rhett's arms.

Rhett watched her sleep, wishing she loved him. Sometimes she seemed so bloody close and then would pull away. He deserved it; he knew and would wait for her. But the fear he felt if she didn't come to love him in the end, made him wonder if a divorce would be better. No matter how much he loved her, he did not wish to live the rest of his life pining after the woman he loved. Though, he pushed aside the thought of divorce for now. Soon they would have another baby and he would feel the waters then.

TBC


	68. What is this fear?

Note: Here is the next chapter and I hope you like it! I didn't wish to make it too fluffy and after I finished writing it, didn't feel very satisfied, but here you go! This next month will be a busy month for me and exciting: my 21rst birthday and a few days later, my anniversary to the man I love. I will try to get out a next chapter before then!

The next chapter will be Rhet's POV and him in Charleston. I can't thank you all enough! My audience is so very kind and I have appreciated each and every review. Enjoy!

Part 68

April 14, 1877

Given that Scarlett was confined to the house and could not do much, drove her to madness. At one time, she may have gone stark raving mad- now she did do tasks at home, which did take some time and calmed her. She played with the children; would sew, worked on designing the nursery and looked over the mill ledgers for Ashley. He dropped by sometimes to visit and she, though Rhett knew nothing of it would have one of her assistants sneak and bring the mill ledgers to her when Rhett was at the bank.

Still, that particular day, Scarlett was bored in her eighth month of pregnancy. She felt fat, like she would pop any day. The Georgian weather was sweltering outside, not as hot as it could be. Later summer was when the temperature rose sky high. This spring though was warmest in her recollection and her mind grasped the significance of this month. April.

"Why, soon," she thought fanning herself heavily with one of her small, black fans, "It will be Ashley's birthday. Two days in fact and I cannot even go see him. Perhaps Rhett wouldn't mind it if I invited him over for dinner. At least then I would have some company."

Sighing loudly, Scarlett felt grumpy. "Oh, Rhett is such a varmint for leaving me today and Saturday of all days! It's not as if he had to work. Then her mind shifted to earlier this morning when Rhett lovingly told her how beautiful she was and kissed her and the memory made her feel slightly better, enough so to smile.

"Perhaps," Scarlett said aloud, staring out at the yard, hearing Wade and Ella's voices in the distance as they played with Georgia. Their laughter filled the air and made Scarlett feel more content as she smiled out at them, "I can tidy Rhett's room for him and heaven knows why he still has that room when we share my room now. It should go to Wade…" Excitement filled Scarlett at suggesting that and suggesting having Ashley over with Beau for dinner.

"Ella, Wade!" Scarlett called out to the yard and watched both her children pause.

"Yes mother?" they called out in unison, Ella's voice more noticeable since it squeaked.

"I am going inside and will be in Uncle Rhett's old room to organize it. Shall I bring Georgia in with me?" She raised her brows.

"No!" Ella answered for her and Wade, the more outspoken one of the two. "She can stay with us mother. We'll take care of her."

"Very, well. Wade is in charge. If she needs me, you only need come upstairs and find me. Later I want to ask you both what we should do for Uncle Ashley's birthday." Two months before had been Wade's birthday and Scarlett still felt guilty, wishing she could have done more for him. Take Wade out but Rhett reassured her after the baby was born, perhaps they would take Wade out or send him on a small trip somewhere.

As she watched him for a moment, she felt sad. Wishing she would have savored and held onto the memories of him as a baby. Yes, she hadn't wanted Wade then and had been an awful mother to him. Now, he was 15 years old and she felt tears prick her eyes as he neared her, Ella following and holding Georgia's hand.

"What is wrong mother?" Wade worriedly asked, ever perceptive and sensitive to how other's felt. He had Charlie's eyes- warm and deep. All emotion he felt showed in his eyes and Scarlett laughed lightly.

"I am only being a goose, Wade. I just- wish I could have given you a better birthday. 15 is an important number and I could not take you out."

"Mother, it's okay, really," Wade reassured her, "Uncle Rhett gave me some money and I saw my friends and bought tons of candy." He smiled. "It was a lot of fun."

"Okay, then," she smiled and touched his cheek lightly. "But after the baby is born, Uncle Rhett and I shall throw you a proper birthday and everyone will be pea green with envy!"

"Can I help mother?" Ella eagerly offered.

Scarlett agreed that Ella could and she gave Georgia a kiss to her cheek. Georgia curled her nose, wiggling to get out of Wade's arms. Then Scarlett left the children and headed into the house, dabbing the sweat from her throat and neck with one of Rhett's old handkerchiefs he loaned her.

Soon she had made it to Rhett's room and felt fat. The last stages of pregnancy were horrid. Yet even then, Scarlett thought of the baby she would soon hold and understood now what Melly had met. It was worth it, a child created out of love… This thought made her pause. Love? Lately, she had come back to this time and time again and her resistance to Rhett had all but melted. However she could not get past admitting it to herself. Love for Rhett was there, illusively there and sometimes when he held her and teased her kindly, it nearly burst from her lips but she wanted to wait until she knew for certain.

"I will know soon," she told herself and the thought made her feel incredibly happy, to see the look on Rhett's face.

On the top of Rhett's dresser was stationary. She grabbed and piled up in a neat stack. Something else caught her eye and she halted. A pucker formed between her brows when she grabbed an envelope and pulled out the contents.

Two train tickets bound for Charleston. Fear spiked Scarlett, then anger. Rhett had not told her he planned on going to Charleston and who was the other ticket for? She could not travel and there were no tickets for the children.

As if Rhett sensed she were in there, she heard him enter his room and say her name. Since her back faced him, he did not sense her mounting anger.

Spinning around to face him, her eyes flashed. She strode over to him and waved them in his face. "What are these?" she accused.

"Scarlett…" Rhett began but when she glared at him he said, "Calm down, my pet, it's not good for the baby."

"The baby? Oh how dare you tell me to calm down when I have a right to be angry! You did not tell me about any tickets and about going to Charleston." Scarlett felt sick and held back angry tears. "Well? I suppose it was too hard for my husband to inform me of his plans."

"Scarlett, I was going to tell you. Tonight in fact."

"Oh, were you?" she suspiciously asked, her eyes signifying she did not believe him in the least. "Or perhaps you would wire me as you left when you were God knows where. Who is the second ticket for?"

Rhett sighed and raked a hand threw his hair. "Honey, it's for Georgia. Ross is sick-"

"Georgia!" Scarlett exclaimed. "You want to take her away from me. I am her mother and you did not consult me. You want to leave me when- you are a cad! Oh, I should have known you didn't love me even when you claimed to. You're are not taking my child from me!"

Wincing, Rhett knew he deserved that. It made him think of their old spat about Bonnie and taking her to London. This was different though. He sympathized with Scarlett and knew he should have informed her earlier about his need to go to Charleston quickly. When he received the telegram from Rosemary this morning, he hurriedly left to buy the tickets and pack.

"Be fair, Scarlett-"

"No! What would have been fair is you telling me, Rhett. You're not taking Georgia from me."

"Will you let me explain?" he expasredly asked and the look she shot him could have melted ice.

"Very well," she stiffly said, "explain your actions, Rhett."

"Honey I am not taking Georgia from you long. The telegram was very sudden and Ross is very sick. Should he die, which to God I pray is not the case, then I thought he should see his niece. He's never met Georgia and I don't want to leave her here alone with you to take care of her. You have enough to worry about with the baby coming and Ella and Wade. I should have told you and please believe that I do love you. I hope I have proven myself honorable despite my past and being unfair," he took a breath, "about Bonnie. I would never take Georgia away from you."

The fight left Scarlett and she felt foolish. Suddenly a sob emerged from her throat and Rhett's eyes widened and he took a step forward as Scarlett launched herself into his arms. He held her tightly and breathed in her scent as she clung desperately to him and cried.

"Baby?" he breathed, "why are you crying?"

"O-ooh R-Rhett, I am such a blubbering fool. I was so afraid. Afraid you were taking Georgia from me and leaving me for good b-because you grew tired of me and waiting for my love. Then I was so angry at you that you would decide to leave now, now when I need you so."

"Do you need me?" he whispered, alertly staring at her tear stained face. "What do you mean?"

"I couldn't be without you long, Rhett. I would go crazy if you were not with me," she admitted, "I- that is that I-"

"Yes," he gently prodded.

"I care for you a great deal and I could not imagine my life without you there."

He took a breath, disappointment mixed with happiness. The words weren't a deceleration of love, but Scarlett told him she needed him and wanted him in her life. Patience, Rhett reminded himself though he was not a patient man.

"Rhett?" she asked, a catch in her voice, "you look disappointed. Is it because… oh-" Scarlett paused and though she did not pride herself on reading Rhett as well as her, she knew that he wished to hear words of love. They were there, she was certain of it but she felt paralyzed to admit them. She didn't wish to when she felt fat, ugly and had just raged and cried to Rhett.

"You wanted me to tell you that I love you," she murmured in a faraway voice. Love. Staring into his eyes and he lowered his lids to obscure her searching green eyes, she bit her lip. If she admitted the words now then he left, it would make it harder for her, for she wanted him by her side and the thought of him leaving terrified her. What if he did not come back? The sensible part of her told herself she would muster the courage to tell him- something…

"Scarlett-" Rhett began, but was cut off as she gently placed her lips to his.

"Shh," she said and laced her fingers through his. "You better return Rhett Butler or you'll be mighty sorry. I shall have a surprise for you when you return."

"A surprise? Hmm… what it is my dear?" he stared at her wolfishly. "Shall I tickle the secret out of you?"

"Don't you dare!" Laughing, Scarlett moved away from him and he grabbed her and she giggled as a small struggle ensued then he drew Scarlett to him and their foreheads touched.

"I shall miss you," he honestly said.

"You won't be gone long, will you, Rhett?" she worriedly asked, laying her cheek next to his.

How could he? Rhett did not think it was possible. She was like his breath and without her he was quite mad. Shaking his head, he placed his hand on her round stomach and felt the warmth of her skin from beneath the fabric.

"Of course not, my dear. Even the war could not keep me long from visiting you, remember? I shall be back in no time, two weeks at the most."

"It feel so long," she mumbled. "I will go crazy cooped up in here alone. Fiddle-dee-dee I am a prisioner in my own home!"

"You have Wade and Ella. I am sure Ashley would love to come by as well."

Thinking about Charleston made Scarlett wish she could travel and not be stuck in the house like a leper. But Charleston conjured up images of Sally Bright and Scarlett's eyes narrowed.

"You will not visit Sally Bright, will you?" she asked, voice stiff.

"Certainly not! Why would I seek her company when I have you, my pet? You have my word as a gentlemen, Scarlett."

"As a gentlemen?" she teased, eyes dancing. "I thought you were no gentleman or so I thought that day in the library."

Rhett threw back his head and roared with laughter, placing his arm around Scarlett and she saucily smiled. The smile briefly flickered though as worry assaulted Scarlett again and a slight panic filled her chest. She placed a small hand on Rhett's strong arm, eyes pleading.

"Promise me you won't be long gone," she pleaded, swallowing and hating herself for feeling so small and helpless.

Rhett gently interlaced their fingers and kissed her hand, causing old desire to coil in her stomach and wished her and Rhett could make love. But with this desire the fear lurked beneath.

"I promise. I will come back to you as soon as humanly possible and before the baby is born," he gently reassured her. "This is my solemn promise, honey."

"I will miss you Rhett," she all but chocked as he drew her into his arms and kissed her passionately, Scarlett began to feel lightheaded and cursed she was pregnant at that moment, she craved the feel of Rhett's body over her as if she were starving.

He groaned. "God, I want you and soon the baby will be born and after you recover I can take my pretty little wife into my bed and ravish her properly," he sensually added and Scarlett bit her lip, trying to keep her tears in and hating that Rhett had to leave.

"He will be back," she told herself. "He claims to love you, after all Rhett has always came back, hasn't he? You are being a silly goose."

Yet she could not shake the sense of foreboding that something bad would happen…

TBC


	69. The Letter

Note: The last time I updated, I was turning 21 and now I am 22. I have many excuses: life, depression, and lack of inspiration, but they don't feel very adequate. I know for me, as someone who loves reading GWTW fanfiction, it drives me insane when other authors suddenly quit writing and give up on a story. Also, when it's been so long since an author updated and I lost track of where the story left off and need to reread their prior chapters to remember the story!

So, I apologize, but I figured I have been writing this story since 2008 and felt it would be wrong to give up when I am so close to finishing. My writing is a tad rusty, but please enjoy. There will be more Scarlett in the next chapter. This chapter is mainly from Rhett's pov. I am not very pleased with this chapter, but C'est la vie!

Also there are such great stories on here and I'll quit lurking and review them.

Part 69

The train seemed to move at a sluggish pace, and not fast enough for the likes of Rhett. He wanted to arrive in Charleston and leave as quickly as possible. In him resided worry for Ross, but the more pressing image in his mind was his green-eyed wife and the way she had clung onto him tightly as they held each other in bed that last night. Once, neither of them had said much except he played with her hair and she rested her hands on his shoulders, spooning with him.

Then his hand lingered on her stomach and he felt the baby move slightly. It made him think of Bonnie. When he first felt her move.

_"I felt her move, my pet!" Rhett exclaimed, a look of unaltered joy appearing on his face._

_ Scarlett quirked a brow. "You act as if Christmas has just come. Fiddle-dee-dee Rhett, it is just a baby, there are a million of them just like our baby will be."_

_ "No," Rhett objected, grinning down at Scarlett. "Our child will be the best looking and most sought after child in Atlanta. With our looks, my pet, our child is bound to be a hit with the old guard." _

_ "Oh, Rhett, how you do run on," Scarlett sighed, grouchy. "But I do think if she is a girl, then she shall be a belle of the county as I was. Ella is far too plain and scatterbrained to be a great beauty." _

_ "Hmm," Rhett murmured, stroking his brow. "I think Ella is quite pretty with her hazel eyes."_

_ "You are far too generous."_

_ "No, just honest. Any child you would have Scarlett, could never be ugly for there mother is not."_

_ Without noticing it on Scarlett's part, her face softened. "Truly? Are you teasing me?"_

_ Shaking his head, he took a step toward her and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Why would I be?"_

_ "You often do,' she grumbled. "You treat Melly far better than me! And I am the one giving you this baby when you know how I hate babies." _

_ "What?" Rhett mockingly asked. Something deep within him wished to goad her. Perhaps it was because she made it clear she did not want his child and it hurt. "Surely not all babies! I am sure you would love to bear a blonde haired, grey eyed baby." _

_ A fierce look crossed her face. "Why, you!" She tried to slap Rhett but he caught her hand and she struggled._

_ Instantly Rhett felt sorry. The sorry mixed with triumph though for the pain Scarlett caused him dreaming of her precious Ashley Wilkes. _

_ "Stop, Scarlett," he warned in a low voice. "You mustn't hurt the baby."_

_ Wrenching out of his arms, she scowled and her face twisted into an ugly frown. "Fine! I shan't hurt your baby. I am beginning to think all you care about is this baby. You only married me as a brooding mare and to torment me. I h-hate you! I shall despise you until the day I die."_

_ Before Rhett could say anything, Scarlett hurriedly left and Rhett sighed, leaning his back against the wall and closing his eyes._

That was not the happiest memory. There were only a small few when she'd been pregnant with Bonnie when they were happy. Back in the present, Rhett looked at Georgia beside him who was sleeping with such a peaceful expression on her face, her rose bud lips slightly parted and breath shallow.

Then her eyes opened, hazel a lot like Ella's but frmaed with darker lashes, which pronounced the green more.

"Are we to 'Char'sten yet, daddy?" she asked, yawning.

"No my Gerogia peach, we have a couple more hours. Then we'll be there in no time and you get to meet your auntie and grandma."

"I miss mama," she told him, eyes looking sad as she hugged her doll to her who happened to be named 'Scarlett.' "How come she is not here with us or brother or sissy?"

"Well," Rhett said with a small smile. "You know how you are going to have a baby brother or sister? Mama can't travel because the baby will be born any day and mama needs to rest. I miss her too."

Rhett realized he never said such to Bonnie when she kept begging to go home, saying how much she missed Scarlett. Back then, Scarlett and him tore each other down so much, by that point in his heart he felt numb to thoughts of her mixed with anger and shame towards himself. That was in the past though and Rhett intended to make everything up to Scarlett. If only she could come to love him again and they could start anew.

The moment Rhett entered the house on Battery, his mother quickly rushed to him and hugged Rhett, looking at Georgia as well.

"Oh, Rhett, she is divine. Looks like the spitting image of you and Scarlett," Eleanor said.

"I know, mother," Rhett smiled, "and you have another grandchild on the way. Is Ross upstairs?"

"Yes, he is." A worried look crossed her face. "I wouldn't take Georgia in yet though, Rhett. He is a little," her voice dropped to a whisper, "intoxicated."

This made Rhett's eyebrows raise. "Drunk?" He nearly laughed but his mother's expression was serious. He wondered why Ross would be drunk when he may be hovering near death's door. It explained it though. Rhett knew what it felt like to want to get so drunk that he'd fall into bed and barely remember who he was or why he lived, especially after Bonnie died or when Scarlett threw him out of their room.

"I'll speak with him," Rhett assured his mother, placing a hand on her shoulder. "And where's Rosemary or Lucille?"

"I gave Lucille the day off," Eleanor weakly smiled. "She's been working so hard this past week since Ross fell ill. Rosemary is napping and it would be best not to disturb her. She's been beside herself about your brother. Oh but I'm so happy to see you my son. We want to make the journey to Atlanta when the little one is born."

"Scarlett and I would like that very much." Rhett gave her a genuine smile. "Okay, well I'm going to face my brother. Let's hope he isn't liable to treat me as Abel. Ross does have a strong left hook."

"Oh Rhett," Eleanor sighed but gave him a tiny smile. "I- there is something I must tell you though in strict confidence. But later…"

"More secret?" Rhett asked with raised brows. "Alright. We'll talk later." He looked at Georgia and stopped down, she flew into his arms and gave him a kiss.

"Goes granma have chocolate?" Georgia asked, notorious for her sweet tooth.

Eleanor laughed. "Oh yes I do, honey. Come along with granma. Your daddy is going to visit your uncle. He is very sick."

A somber look crossed her face. "I'll pray for uncle."

"Oh what an angel," Eleanor crooned. "You do that. Let's go find you that chocolate."

Rhett smiled as he watched Eleanor usher Georgia along with her and sighed. He missed Scarlett and worried about her. No doubt while he was gone she'd sneak out and try to work. That woman still held the most vivacious spirit he'd ever seen in one person and he feared she'd over exert herself. No longer having Mammy or Melanie around made it difficult to find anyone to speak sense to his stubborn wife.

Heading up the stairs, Rhett's mind flashed back to that day he hung near life and death after the boat capsized. Too bad Scarlett couldn't have accompanied him, he held no doubt she'd have Ross out on bed in no time. Him and his brother had never been close, needless to say they butted heads in every way and Ross angered him with his drinking. Rhett didn't have much room to judge him for his love of alcohol, but he wished Ross would make an effort to stop his habits and settle down. Their mother could only take so much and the Butler name had been blackened enough from the likes of him and his former father Rhett darkly though.

Knocked on the door and Ross' hoarse voice allowed him entrance. Rhett stepped in and eyed Ross on the bed. His brother wearily looked at him and sighed, his usual impenitence and arrogance somehow absent in his weakened state.

"Hello, Rhett. Bring your beautiful life and lovely daughter?" Nearly spoken bitterly, with a twist of Ross' lips but he was more silent.

"Georgia is here, yes. Surely you heard Scarlett is pregnant. She couldn't come." Rhett took a seat in the chair next to Ross' bed and his dark eyes flickered to the nightstand to see a bottle of whiskey.

Anger entered Rhett's eyes, even though this fool was sick, he was still drinking and killing himself all the more. Of course Rhett knew the want to escape, oh he knew it well, but what demons did Ross have? His manners were lacking and everyone knew he was a drunkard, but Ross never knew what it was to feel the rejection and be disowned from the family.

"Don't approve, dear brother?" Ross mockingly asked, weakly. "Don't worry. It's empty. I just wanted it there, to look at it and pretend. Can't get access to the real thing. So are you here for my death?"

"You look well enough," Rhett darkly said. "You're still speaking."

Ross relaxed against the pillows and sighed. "If this fever worsens, I want you to do something. Give a letter to someone for me." He closed his eyes for a moment and did indeed appear paler.

"Sure. To whom does the letter get delivered to?" Rhett sorely wished to smoke but resisted.

"Anne," Ross croaked, looking ill. In a quick motion, Ross sat up and nearly didn't hunch over the bedpan in time. His shoulders heaved as he threw up a decent amount and groaned, breathing heavily.

As Rhett watched his brother, his own flesh and blood, he began to feel pity. What had driven Ross to be such a son of a bitch? Then again, Rhett was one as well, just in a more suave manner than Ross. Ross acted rougher and more obvious than Rhett had. No, Rhett liked being a bastard with a cool, jeering and laughing manner. Anne, though? Which Anne? Shot Ross a quizzical look underneath raised brows.

"You know how many Anne's there are, Ross?"

"There is only one Anne," Ross whispered and lay back, wiping his mouth with his hand. "Hampton."

"Anne Hampton?" Rhett slowly echoed and had questions of his own, but ignored them for the moment. "By all means I'll deliver the letter, but why on earth would a woman such as sweet little Miss Hampton receive you or be acceptable of a letter from the likes of you?"

"She might not be, Rhett, but since I am near death according to the damn doctor, what have I to lose? I'm pathetic already. Go grab the letter from the drawer over there."

Raising a brow, Rhett got up and walked across the room. Opened the drawer and found a folded letter on the top with the name Anne scrawled in dark, bold letters across the top of the paper. Turning back, Rhett looked at his brother and then nodded.

"I'll give it to her today if you wish. Drop it by her home."

"Yes." Ross sighed and his tone grew emotionless. "Read it now. Aloud, if you will. I've been good at words, but in this case, nothing would be good enough or adequate for her."

Another odd look at Ross. Rhett wondered if his brother was delusional. Taking a seat again in the chair, Rhett crossed his legs and leaned back, lazily opening the letter. Clearing his throat, he began to read:

"Dear Anne. I fear I should never write you a letter or dare hope that a woman of your breeding and goodness would accept a letter from a man such as me. For two years now, I have suffered in quiet passion and longing for you-"

Rhett stopped and stared at Ross, shocked. Good god. Of course Ross would be capable of desiring a woman, but a sweet woman such as Anne Hampton? This stunned him. He knew Ross frequented with loose woman. Before he'd promised to be faithful to Scarlett, so had he. In the past, he couldn't remember a time Ross ever courted a lady.

"Continue," Ross quietly insisted.

Rhett continued: "I have suffered in quiet passion and longing for you. Demons of doubt, bitterness and anger have assaulted me for years. Mainly my own inadequacies and imperfections plaguing me. My whole world has been dark until you smiled at me and treated me as a man. When I spoke with you, you were kind and ignored those who urged you not to. Anne, I am near death most likely, but wish you to know that you are in my thoughts constantly. You are an angel and I wished you to know, if I die, it will be more peaceful because the thought of your sweetness and kindness will be on my mind. Perhaps if I hadn't been such a coward in this life or had a ruined reputation, I could have asked you to be my wife. Live a good life.

Closing the letter after finishing, Rhett looked at Ross again and shook his head. "Well, I… don't know what to say frankly. I'm speechless. You didn't even sign the letter."

"There's no point. Even if I survived, it would ruin her reputation to marry me. She's such an innocent woman, Rhett. No guile or tarnish about her. I've done wrong back in the day, but to do so to her would be specially cruel."

"I know," Rhett sighed and tapped the letter against his leg. "I knew a woman like that once. All heart. But she was a lot stronger than one would think. Maybe one of the strongest women I had the fortune of knowing. I'll deliver it."

Ross nodded. "Good. I'm tired now." Making it obvious he wished to be alone.

Taking a breath, Rhett stood up. "I'll be back soon. Rest."

Rhett headed for the door and left the room. Rosemary eyed him, she'd been waiting outside and her eyes flickered to the letter and she raised a brow in silent question.

Rhett shrugged and smirked. "It's in confidence. No one shall know." He laughed and brushed past her, grabbing his hat and headed for the stairs to leave the house, placing the letter safely in his pocket as he shut the door behind him.

XXX

Rhett raised his eyes to the staircase, waiting in the foyer for Anne Hampton. He saw the small-framed woman nod at the maid and look down at him. A welcoming smile and slightly inquisitive look entered her brown eyes as she made her way down the staircase. Politely, Rhett bowed and took off his hat.

"Mr. Butler," Anne haltingly said. "What a surprise."

"Yes, it would be. I am not in the habit of calling on many people." Rhett chuckled, though with Ross being sick, it didn't feel like the appropriate time to chuckle. Still, this situation was romantic in a way. Amusing and not lost on Rhett. Ross pined for the unattainable and pure Miss Anne Hampton.

Anne's eyes flickered and she lowered her eyes. Obviously uncertain of what to say, but she raised her eyes to meet his. "Is this a social visit or for a greater purpose?" she softly asked, more straightforward.

"Something someone gave me. A letter to deliver to you, Miss Hampton." Rhett reached into his coat pocket and pulled out the letter, offering it to her.

Anne gently took the letter from him. She opened it and her eyes scanned the contents. As she read, Rhett watched her intently, more to see her reaction and read her true feelings of the letter. A slow flush crept to her cheeks and her eyes snapped to his.

"Who is this- from?"

"I fear I have no right to say and was not given leave to do so. I'm sorry."

Anne took a deep breath and exhaled. Her gentle eyes roved to her hand, which the letter was still clasped in. "I- do not know what to say. Should I reply or- leave it alone? How can I reply if I do not know the man in which to reply to?"

Clearing his throat, Rhett sighed. He felt awkward offering advice to Anne Hampton because he would play the devil's advocate. "Again, I'm sorry. I don't believe he expected a reply. I'll take my leave now of you, Miss Hampton. I wish you a good day."

"He's sick… this man-" Anne softly said and tears filled her eyes and she paled, swallowed. "I know who this is from or presume I know. Your brother. Everyone knows he is sick."

Rhett didn't deny it or affirm it. "My brother is getting better, I believe. He is weak, but able to talk now and carry on a lucid conversation."

Relief entered her eyes and her shoulders sagged.

"But he could die," she pragmatically murmured and she placed the letter against her breast. "I surely don't know what to do. My family would be greatly angered, should I entertain your brother's affections. And I have never disobeyed them."

"I know. I believe my brother just wished you to know that you affected him, Miss Hampton. Sometimes it's better to let sleeping dogs lie. He cares for your reputation and your honor. Marry some gentleman, as it should be. Well, I best be going." Rhett wanted to check on Ross and make sure he wasn't taking a turn for the worse.

"Wait!" Anne breathless said, a flush still on her cheek and her eyes darted and lowered, she'd grabbed his arm and quickly removed her hand, embarrassed. "Forgive me for being so frank, but you chose Mrs. Butler to love, in spite of the gossip and your reputation, you and her are happy?"

Of course Anne and all of Charleston would know that. The notorious gossipers, Rhett thought. He gave Anne a kind smile, close lipped and realized her words were true. He was happy and he believed Scarlett was happy being with him. In spite of everything, he still loved his beautiful green-eyed vixen of a wife fiercely.

"When it comes down to it, Miss Hampton," Rhett slowly said, serious. "Men have been fools for love. They have sold everything for love and have even given up kingdoms. Yes, I'd do anything for Scarlett. Give her anything and my reputation be damned. A reputation is good and noble, but in the end, when one loves, well an honest love, there is nothing better than that. If Mrs. Butler and I can make it with all that has happened, surely anyone could," he finished wryly.

Confusion welled in her eyes and Anne looked visibly shaken. "I don't know. How can I trust this man's intentions for me are true and pure? I know of his past. I am not a… woman to. I try to be a lady. Anyways, I…" her voice became more steady and composed, business like. "I have kept you long enough," contritely. "Thank you for delivering the letter."

Rhett wished he could have said more. To ease her mind because he could tell she was troubled and confused. Truthfully though, he didn't know Ross' intentions. Was Ross being impulsive again, selfish or delusional? Perhaps he'd never know. He felt pity for Anne and hoped she would go on to marry a better man than his brother and have a happy and long life.

A final nod, Rhett turned and left Anne Hampton standing there, clutching the letter and staring at it as if in a daze.

TBC


End file.
